Best friends and siblings
by Fairusa84
Summary: Bella and Edward meet at a college party, not knowing their siblings are each other's best friends. AU/AT/AH, a little OOC, mostly canon pairings for main characters . Rated M for adult content & strong language coming up. R&R please!
1. A highschool girl at college

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or the characters. They're all Stephenie Meyer's invention. I just love to incorporate them into the figments of my own imagination.**

**This story has been playing on in my mind for the past couple of years. Recently I've decided to properly put it in writing. To test it on an audience, I've decided to rewrite it as a fanfic. Reviews are greatly appreciated!**

**Common pairings. All human.**

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1. A high school girl at college

I hadn't even thought about what to wear. The bigger issue was how I would be able to go to the party in the first place. But Emmett had thought about that. What was the purpose of me having a room at his place if I wasn't going to use it? We would just hang out with a movie and I'd stay the night. Charlie and Renee didn't question our plans in the slightest.

So when Rosalie was inspecting the contents of my closet, I really had no idea what to wear. What does a high school girl wear to a college party? Certainly not what you'd wear to a club in Soho, but definitely not your everyday clothes.

'What kind of message to you want to send out?'

_Uhm... not being seven__teen of course!_

'Can't we just keep it simple?'

Like jeans and a t-shirt. Skinny jeans and not too girlie t-shirt. V-neck with a nice belt?

'Fine,' Rosalie said, 'but I'm putting you in heels.'

I was supposed to look like I belonged at this party.

It was actually kind of exciting being at a college party. The only downside was that I didn't know anyone, and after a while I couldn't find Emmett and Rosalie anymore. Well, it's not like I expected them to babysit me. It was their night out too! And they had introduced me to some people, but I forgot their names just as soon as they walked away. Oh well, I didn't really mind hanging out by myself.

The party was pretty good and I was enjoying myself. Until some drunken guy thought it neccessary to not only spill both our drinks over me, but also run me over, landing me on top of the table full of cups. He made an attempt to get up and wipe me down, emphasizing the wiping part. I tried to push him off, but he was too heavy and drunk. Around me some people started laughing.

'Wow, Tyler, that's not what we meant by 'getting her a drink'!'

Hilarious. Now please, somebody help me? But they just stood there, laughing at their friend.

After what seemed like forever, but in reality only was about a minute, the drunk was being pulled off of me and launched out the door. Another guy walked up to me, and he looked angry.

'Guys like that should keep their hands off girls like you.'

Did he pull the other guy off?

'I'm so sorry,' he said, while helping me up, 'are you okay?'

I was at a loss for words, so I just nodded.

'We have to get you out of those wet clothes.'

How did he envision that happening? I lived nowhere near the party and didn't bring anything else. I also still couldn't form a coherent sentence. Taking charge, he grabbed my hand and pulled me to the hallway, up the stairs. A few people started cheering. When we reached the bathroom he closed and locked the door.

'We have to rinse that top, otherwise it'll smell and stain.'

I just stood there. He couldn't expect me to take off my clothes and walk around in my bra the rest of the night. Could he? Apparently he was thinking the same thing, because he quickly removed his own shirt, handed it to me and turned around so I could change.

Of course his shirt was much to large for me, so I put a knot in it and rolled up the sleeves. While putting it on, I smelled his cologne. Armani Code. Delicious.

'Okay…', I whispered, and he turned around.

He looked at me and a beautiful smile lighted up his handsome features – how could I not have noticed that earlier?! He wasn't huge like my brother. Emmett really resembled grandpa McCarty in that way: big, brawny, all muscles, but also kind of like a big teddybear. This guy however... he was tall and lean but also muscular. He was wearing fitted dark jeans – not the baggy kind – that hugged his body in just the right places. His features were very symmetrical, but his smile was slightly crooked and his green eyes had this naughty sparkle in them. Wow. And then his hair: bronze, messy, and some of it fell in his face. How long did it take him to get it like that every day?

He raised one perfect eyebrow and looked at me questioningly. Oh, right, my top. He took it from my hands and started rinsing. All I could do was watch. Slightly dazzled, I admit.

'I haven't introduced myself, sorry. I'm Edward', he said.

I was still trying to find my composure. _Answer him!_

'Uhm… B-b-bella', I managed to say.

Great. I actually proved able to be an even bigger clutz than usual.


	2. Damsel in distress

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or the characters. They're all Stephenie Meyer's invention. I just love to incorporate them into the figments of my own imagination.**

**Common pairings. All human.**

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2. Damsel in distress

What was I doing here again? I know I used to like these kind of parties. But the last couple of months... I just found them tiring. Always the same people, all there for the same reasons: feeling superior, getting drunk and hooking up with someone. I'd participated for years, because that was just the thing to do. But now... I don't know why I wasn't feeling like it anymore. I just did.

So why was I here now? Mostly because of my little sister and my friends. My sister was convinced I was in dire need of a night out. During mid-terms I mostly studied, of course, and had barely seen my friends. Usually we'd meet at least once a week, even when we had demanding obligations, like mid-terms and what not. Hanging out, gaming, working out, watching movies, partying... Only this time various stuff came up and changed those plans.

Jasper had only had one mid-term and afterwards had flown to his father, who'd moved back to Texas a few years ago, for a week. He'd visited over the summer, but this way he wouldn't have to feel guilty for staying here over the holidays. I couldn't really blame him. Mr. Hale was alright, but kind of moody and distant. Jasper's sister Rosalie hadn't joined him; she didn't mind spending Thanksgiving at her father's. She and Emmett also had some more mid-terms to study for, and Emmett parents had just moved into town, so they'd decided to go over there to help them settle in.

I knew they all'd be at the party, so I figured I might as well make an appearance. My sister had a slightly different view on it, however.

'At least wear a nice shirt', she said, diving into my closet, 'Even if you're not looking for something, it wouldn't hurt you to raise the bar a bit.'

While she finished styling me – seriously, that girl would make a great personal shopper or stylist – she continued her lecture on leaving good impressions. I tuned in and out, thinking she meant well.

'Say hi to Jasper for me?', she asked as I walked out the door.

'Will do. Any plans for tonight?'

'Just a movie with the girls.'

So now I found myself at this party, one hand holding a beer, the other a cigarette. About an hour ago I'd run into Emmett and Rosalie and we'd agreed I'd come over for dinner later that week. And just now I had been talking to Jasper.

'Oh, by the way, before I forget: my sister's been asking about you.'

It was always fun anticipating his reaction and Jasper didn't let me down: he almost choked on his beer.

'When are you guys finally gonna admit you like each other?', I chuckled, 'Would save us a lot of drama.'

He looked at me startled and shocked and hurried away, mumbling something along the lines of 'bathroom... phone...' Whatever. I'd known Jasper for years. He's always had this thing for my sister, and when she started to notice boys, she noticed him too. I think they might have kissed once or twice. Jasper's a good guy, just a little shy. However, the tension between the two of them was getting more noticeable recently...

Jasper had just disappeared, when I saw her. The only girl here I hadn't seen before. Petite but not skinny, dark brown hair cascading over her shoulders. She was by herself, but didn't look lonely. Interesting. While I was trying to decide whether or not to go talk to her, I noticed Tyler Crowley heading her way. He obviously had a beer, or ten, too much. He managed to run her over, launching her into the table of cups. Knowing Tyler would take any opportunity thrown his way, I hurried through the crowd, over to the kitchen. Yup, he wasn't drunk enough not to notice his victim was a girl and had decided to wipe her clean using his hands. Some frat guys stood around laughing, while the girl tried desperately to be free from his groping hands. I got angry, both at Tyler and at the audience, grabbed him by the shirt and yanked him off the girl and out the door. He didn't put up much of a fight.

'Guys like that should keep their hands off girls like you', I growled, mostly to myself.

She looked up, startled. Right, the laughing frat boys could wait. She was clearly the priority. I helped her up.

'I'm so sorry. Are you okay?'

She nodded.

She was soaked. And all the beer and shots she was covered in would probably stain her clothes and start to smell soon. She at least needed to rinse out her top. She looked at me questioningly, so I grabbed her hand and pulled her with me, up the stairs. The guys that just minutes ago had encouraged Tyler now started cheering my 'victory'. Childish.

Luckily the bathroom was free. I locked the door to give us some privacy. The girl still hadn't said a word. She probably thought I was some jerk who couldn't wait to get her naked.

_Could've been the case a while ago._

No, I'd never been that cunning, even when I was on my worst behavior. I hoped. It wasn't what I was after now anyway. I thought for a minute and decided to just give her my shirt to wear, glad I was wearing a t-shirt underneath.

_Come on, Eddie, you would've given her your shirt regardless._

Fine. But I did have the decency to turn around so she could change.

'Okay...' I softly heard behind me.

I turned back. Wow. This girl, wearing my shirt… looked so good! And not just in the way a throbbing in my jeans signaled me.

_Very mature and respecting._

Well, I may be on my best behavior, I'm still a man!

But the way she was wearing my shirt... sleeves rolled, unbuttoned for the most part, a knot in the hem, showing me her stomach... and damn, was that a belly ring? I couldn't help but grin.

_At least you didn't moan._

I know, I know, it had been a while.

But I didn't want to take advantage of the situation. Something told me I'd regret that later on.

Apparently she was still a bit dazed. I raised my eyebrow, eyed her curiously and took the top from her hands, so I could start rinsing it.

At that point I realized I hadn't introduced myself to her yet. No wonder she was so quiet!

'I'm Edward', I said.

I looked up just in time to see her blush vehemently, which made her even more attractive.

'B-b-bella', she said.

Lovely name. It sounded oddly familiar...


	3. Cooling down

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or the characters. They're all Stephenie Meyer's invention. I just love to incorporate them into the figments of my own imagination.**

**Common pairings. All human.**

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3. Cooling down

After Edward finished rinsing my top and even found a blowdryer to dry it, I put it back on and we headed back downstairs. I hadn't spoken much after introductions; I was still recovering from falling over and meeting him. When we got downstairs I continued out the door. No way I was going anywhere near those drunk people now. Also, I could use some fresh air. Edward walked with me. Not really neccessary, but welcome anyway. We walked around the house and through the garden. Still not talking much.

'I haven't seen you around before,' Edward mentioned, 'Did you just transfer here?'

'No, I don't go here. I came with my brother.'

'Where do you go then?'

Now was the time to come up with a story about some college, but why bother?

'Uhm...' How was I going to explain this? 'Not?'

No reaction.

'I'm in high school...'

I half expected him to end the conversation then and there, but instead he asked me what I thought of this college party. Well... he could probably tell, seeing as how we met. He chuckled and grinned that sexy crooked smile again. Sexy, yes.

The cold night air was nice. Still I found myself getting a little dizzy. Those shots really weren't that friendly, in hindsight.

'I think I need to sit down.'

He walked me over to a bench.

'Are you okay?'

'Yeah, just not quite used to drinking.'

He must have thought I was such a baby. Luckily it was dark so he couldn't see my blush.

'You don't have to keep me company if you don't want to', I said.

I could imagine he'd prefer going back to the party.

'And leave you here by yourself?', he asked, sounding a bit offended, 'I don't think so.'

That was actually really nice of him. Added to the help he'd already offered. What was it about this guy?

It was quite chilly; I shivvered. To confirm my observations about his willingness to help, he put an arm around me and rubbed my arm, to warm me up. My heart skipped a beat at his touch.

'You're cold. Do you want to go back inside?'

'No, I'm fine', I said, but moved to sit a little closer to him.

I actually was quite cold, but didn't feel like going back yet. He was nice and warm and I just wanted to spend a little more time alone with him. He held an arm around me and kept rubbing my arm.

I remembered I hadn't thanked him yet for helping me, so I leaned over and whispered 'Thank you, for everything' in his ear. In response he pulled me closer, one hand placed in my neck, the other wrapped around my waist, and kissed me.

Wow. Didn't see that one coming. Combined with the drinks I'd had, it took a while for me to realise I should react to his kiss. But before I could do so, he pulled back and looked at me questioningly. I leaned back in and pressed my lips to his. He pulled me onto his lap and I put my arms around his neck. His kisses were amazing: not too rough, not too wet, not too much tongue. His scent was overwhelming, but I also got caught up in his taste. It was very sweet, almost vanilla-like, with a bit of peppermint and a hint of cigarettes.

When he broke away to take a breath, I realised I had completely forgotten to breathe since the kiss started; I was feeling a little lightheaded and gasped for air. He chuckled and hugged me. We sat like that for a while. He stroked my back and arm and every now and again would lean in to kiss my hair, my neck, my lips. It felt amazing.


	4. Crossing the line?

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or the characters. They're all Stephenie Meyer's invention. I just love to incorporate them into the figments of my own imagination.**

**Common pairings. All human.**

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4. Crossing the line?

I couldn't help it. I knew she was slightly intoxicated, and maybe a little shaken up still by what happened with Tyler. But when she whispered her thank you in my ear, I just had to kiss her.

She didn't react. At all. She didn't answer my kiss, but she also didn't push me away. Nothing whatsoever. This was... strange. Or did she have more to drink than I'd thought? Shit, this wasn't supposed to happen! I didn't want to take advantage of the situation, or her, I just wanted... I don't know! Not force her into anything, at least. So I pulled back. I looked at her, hoping I hadn't crossed a line.

This time she reacted. She leaned back in and kissed me. Wow. Didn't see that one coming. She kissed me back! I gently pulled her onto my lap and kissed her again. This time when I broke away to take a much needed breath, I couldn't help but laugh a bit, as she was practically gasping for air. Did she forget to breath?

It was still chilly outside and it was getting late, but I didn't want to let her go just yet. I held her in my lap and stroked her back. I couldn't stop myself from leaning down and kiss her from time to time.

Suddenly I felt something vibrate. Her phone. Whoever she was here with. She said she was on her way. I asked if she wanted me to walk her – _say yes, please say yes_ – but she said her brother gave her clear directions where to meet him. Maybe just as well. I wasn't sure if running into her brother at this point would be helpfull.

_Coward._

I know. But come on, how do you think _I_ would react if I caught _my_ sister with some random guy?

...

Right.

_Except if it were __Jasper._

Yeah, well, that's not the point. This isn't one of my best friends we're talking about, it's a stranger. Why don't you get that? Best to postpone that particular event for a while.

_Postpone? Are you planning on a repeat of tonight?_

I don't know!

At least I had the presence of mind to give her my number.

When she was out of sight, I decided to call it a night. Like I said, these kinds of parties just didn't hold my interest anymore. Although I did have to thank my sister for kicking my butt out of the house tonight. This party turned out better than expected. But now the fun was over.

I had just reached my car when I got a text. Unknown number.

_Thank you. __For everything._

My grin was ridiculously wide. Luckily no one was watching. They would probably be freaked out by me. I didn't care. I had kissed her. And now I had her number.


	5. First day of school

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or the characters. They're all Stephenie Meyer's invention. I just love to incorporate them into the figments of my own imagination.**

**Common pairings. All human.**

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5. First day of school

First day of school. For now my mom would drive me, until I could set something up with a classmate or, hopefully, a new friend who lived nearby. There was a bus, but the closest stop from our new house was through a rather ditchy road, so my parents prefered it this way. Frankly it was fine by me. Bus... not something I had looked forward to. I definitely needed to get my driver's license soon!

First days of school are all the same. Call in to the office, fill out forms and being escorted to my first class, where I'd have to face the humiliation of being introduced in front of the class and forced to share some 'fun information' about myself. Repeat that about six times, depending on the schedule, and you've got TORTURE spelled in all capitals.

So far, this first day was predictable: the teacher to my first class, luckily History, was aware of my arrival and tried his hardest to keep my time in the spotlight as pleasant, and thankfully as short as possible. I only had to say my name and where I was from. Great. I already liked History.

There were a few empty seats left and I tried to decide which one to take as quickly and effectively as possible. I prefered a seat in the front in History; it was one of my favorite subjects. But, as this was my first day, taking a seat in the front equalled being labeled an ass kissing nerd. I wasn't really in the mood for that. A seat in the back was also out of the question, as that meant I couldn't care less about the subject because I thought myself above paying attention. Added downside was that in the case of actually wanting to pay attention, the teacher's words were lost in the chatter of those in front of you.

So that left me with two vacant seats somewhat centrally located. One was next to a guy who clearly wasn't awake yet; he was sprawled over both desks. The other one was next to a girl with black spikey hair and a big smile on her face. Bingo.

I thanked the teacher and made my way to my desk of choice.

'Hi!', the girl whispered to me enthousiastically, 'I'm Alice Cullen!'

'Bella Swan', I whispered back while pointing at myself.

The teacher started his lecture by then. We were studying the Roman Empire, a topic I had already covered – amply – back in London. I glanced through my textbook and discovered that the material was actually pretty basic. Five centuries discussed in little over ten pages. I'd written essays on single emperors that covered more than that! It looked like this class would be one to relax in, great for first period. Maybe I could even recycle some of my old papers. I was pulled out of my reverie when Alice slipped me a piece of paper.

_So, you moved here from London?_

I nodded.

_Sounds fabulous! You've got to tell me all about it! Lunch?_

I nodded again. It would be nice to sit with someone I'd seen before at lunch. To not be completely lost on my first day .

_I hope you don't have any trouble catching up,_ she continued.

_Don't worry about it, _I wrote back, _ I'm familiar with most of it. Just the sciences, those will be tricky._

She asked to see my schedule, and it turned out I was in her English and Chemistry classes as wel.

_You can be my lab partner in Chem if you want._

I nodded and mouthed 'thanks', just in time for the teacher to hand out tomorrow's assignment before the bell rang.

Alice showed me how to get to my next class and said she'd pick me up there to go to English. She was very excited and upbeat, which I would have found annoying, if I didnt feel so welcomed by her.

I walked into the classroom and introduced myself to the teacher, who handed me a list of authors we would be discussing this year. Caesar and Ovid were the ones to provide the texts for this semester. Again, familiar to me. However, I loved Latin, so having to read them again wasn't that bad.

As promised, Alice was waiting for me when the bell rang. In English it turned out there actually was a book on the list I hadn't read yet: _Wuthering Heights._ Why hadn't I read that yet? Oh right, it was on this semester's list in London too. Coincidence. My last class before lunch was Maths. Not my most favorite subject, but I had been taking it as an A-level in London, so it couldn't be that hard here. And at least it would mean some homework. Not that I was that big on homework, but none at all would get boring too. When the hour of juggling formulas, shapes and pi's was over, it was finally time for lunch.

I met Alice outside the cafeteria and as we walked in I was glad I did. I would never have been able to find her in here, there were so many people! We got in line, filled our trays – the food looked pretty good, considering this was a school – and I followed her to an empty table. We were quickly joined by two boys who were introduced to me as Ben Cheney and Mike Newton. Ben came across as a quiet and thoughtful boy, while Mike liked to be the focus of the conversation. They were both nice enough though, and tried to make me feel welcome.

After a few minutes two girls sat down at our table, their hair a little damp.

'I still don't get why we have Gym before lunch', one of the girls complained, 'It totally ruins my look and messes with my lunch.'

'That's Jessica Stanley, Mike's girlfriend of sorts,' Alice whispered to me, 'They're like on and off all the time', she continued, giggling.

'Jess, we've been over this,' the other girl sighed, 'just wear less make up in the morning and fix it by the end of lunch, you'll be fine.'

'Angela, Jessica, this is Bella,' Alice interrupted them, 'She just moved here from London.'

Apparently, London was the magic word. Jessica quickly seemed to forget her make up worries and wanted to know all about the fabulousness that was the city I spent the past five years of my life in. I would have been the center of attention, if Jessica hadn't done most of the talking, asking me about shopping and nightlife. When lunch was almost over, Jessica went to fix her make up and Alice and I went to Chemistry, so I could meet the teacher and get my book and equipment.

I really didn't like Chemistry, but I had to take a science, and it was better than Physics or Biology. In Chemistry, we at least would get to do some fun experiments. Alice actually enjoyed the subject, which was beyond me, and it turned out she was pretty good at it.

'Don't worry, sweetie, if you want to we can study together. I'd be happy to help you', she whispered to me as she saw me struggle with the formulas.

I had no idea what I was doing.

'Actually, that would be great, thanks!'

'Do you want to come over after school?'

'Sure. Just let me call my mom between classes.'

Wow, this girl was really nice and friendly!

French was uneventful. In fact, I could probably teach the class. The final ordeal of this day was Gym. I wasn't very athletic and I didn't particularly like working out. Plus, in Gym you would be graded for your performance, not for the effort you put in. Usually I would nearly fail, causing the teacher to take pity on me if I was lucky, and they would cut me some slack. This time however, no such luck. The coach forced me to play basketbal, and even though I couldn't aim if my life depended on it, I had to take free shots. Of course I couldn't get the ball even remotely close to the basket, and I spent the entire double period blushing, cursing and apologizing. Alice thought it was pretty hilarious, but thankfully didn't try to embarrass me further and kept the ball as far away from me as possible. When the coach whistled, signaling we could change, I couldn't help but sigh. I had survived.

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**A/N: I included some of my own high school experiences in this chapter, so there's a lot of me in Bella's likes and dislikes. And yes, I was the geek that loved Latin and History and sucked at Gym :p**


	6. Friends and texts

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or the characters. They're all Stephenie Meyer's invention. I just love to incorporate them into the figments of my own imagination.**

**Common pairings. All human.**

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6. Friends and texts

The rest of my weekend was relatively quiet. I slept in on Saturday. On my way downstairs I noticed my sister was even more hyped than usual. After finding my father having brunch with Esme this made sense. If Esme were here, there was a good chance Jasper wouldn't be too long. Right on cue, there was a knock on the door and I went to let him in.

'Dad, maybe you ought to give Jazz a key too, since he's spending more and more time here.'

Jasper shot me a nervous glance. Lucky for him, our parents appeared to be quite oblivious to the infatuation he had developed for my sister over the years.

'I didn't know you were coming over today', I said to Jasper.

'Yeah, I just thought you might wanna hang out or something. I mean, we didn't really last night, seeing as you disappeared all of a sudden...', he hinted.

'Oh, that's right, how was the party, dear?', Esme asked.

'Fine,' I mumbled, planning to kick Jasper's ass when I got the chance, 'uhm... I kinda saved a girl from Tyler.'

'That boy's got trouble written all over him', my father sighed.

After exchanging some more comments regarding the party, I decided it was time to leave, before the more awkward questions would be asked. Awkward for me, that is. I didn't mind triggering Jasper's or my sister's nerves. They should just come clean and start dating. Preferably _before_ she was his stepsister. That would just be weird.

I spent the afternoon playing some videogame with Jasper, while my sister hovered around. From time to time I made a comment that earned me death glares from her and embarrassed coughs from Jasper. Yes, I know, I can be quite the jerk. All in good spirits, though. Just trying to get them to admit their feelings. I was glad, however, that they didn't notice the profuse texting that was taking place. Bella and I had been texting each other all weekend, mostly about trivial things, a little flirtatious.

_What r u up 2 2day? – B_

_Just messing w/ my sis & a mate – E_

_What's there 2 mess w/? – B_

_They're in denial. Lol. What r u doing? – E_

_Unpacking more boxes, boring :S – B_

Later that day I had gotten a text from Emmett so Jasper and I headed over to his place to watch some dvds.

_Still messing around? – B_

_Nah, dvds w/ friends. Gave up on sis 4 2day – E_

_U can only do so much; u deserve a break – B_

_Thnx. U taking 1 from unpacking? – E_

_Yeah. Still jetlagged. Party didn't help. Off 2 bed. Night – B_

_Ttyl. Night – E_

Sunday was spent much the same: watching some tv, reading a few articles for upcoming classes, all the while texting with Bella.

_School 2morrow? Excited? – E_

_1st day. Not really. School = school – B_

_It'll be fine. Let me know how it went. – E_

_School 2morrow? Excited? – B_

_Yeah. New courses. Should be okay – E_

_I bet. College sounds fun. Let me know how it went. Off 2 bed now – B_

Okay, if this wasn't flirting... I decided to see if this would continue when she started school, then maybe ask her out.

_Dude, she's in high school. Don't you think that's a little young?_

I didn't even know how old she was exactly.

_For all you know she might be a freshman._

No freshman looks like that. Or texts like that...

_Dream on. She's jailbait._

We'll see. I was curious, though.


	7. Homework

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or the characters. They're all Stephenie Meyer's invention. I just love to incorporate them into the figments of my own imagination.**

**Common pairings. All human.**

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7. Homework

Alice's house was huge! I mean, my parents had money and I've always enjoyed a comfortable lifestyle. But Alice's family must have been loaded. The house was really light and open and the rooms were very spacious. Alice had the most amazing walk-in closet and her own bathroom. Even though the house was decorated in a stylish and timeless manner, Alice's room was a cozy clutter of... stuff. It really reflected her personal style; happy, colorful, eclectic.

She threw the clothes that were scattered over her bed onto one of the chairs and told me to make myself at home while she fixed us a snack. I plopped down on the bed and pulled out my phone. I had gotten some texts from Edward throughout the day, but had only managed to send some quick, matter-of-fact replies. I noticed Emmett had texted me as well, so I decided to call him first to let him know how school was. He'd be glad to know I'd already made a friend. After that I texted Edward.

_School was okay. __Gym sucked, but I survived – B_

_Glad to hear. Lots of catching up 2 do? – E_

_No. I'm ahead in most. Just Chem is tricky. – B_

_Need any help? I was pretty good at it… - E_

_Thnx but I'm already studying w/ a friend – B_

_Wow you're fast in the friend department :) – E_

_Well I'm just so very charming :p – B_

_That you are ;) – E_

Was he flirting again?

Before I could come up with a witty reply, Alice came back in with two cokes, two bottles of water, a bag of Doritos and a jar of dip.

'So... do you want to start homework or just hang out?'

'Well, we've got some time before I've got to go home and _I_ only need to struggle through Chem so I guess we could relax first...', I said.

So we talked some more about the placed I'd lived at and visited, her own travels, my family, her family... It was nice and I was beginning to think I'd found a nice friend in her. We then decided to tackle our chemistry homework. We had to describe the chemical compounds of alcohol and predict the results when combined with certain pharmaceuticals. Probably an attempt by the teacher to promote awareness of substance abuse. I just couldn't discern the different molecules. What was the use anyway? Alice seemed to get it, at least, and tried to help me understand.

After a while we took a little break and watched some silly clips on YouTube. I checked my phone to see a few new texts.

_Trying 2 stay awake, most boring lecture ever. Could use some distraction ;) – E_

_Hating Chem yet? Or did it already kill u? – E_

He must have been really bored. I almost felt bad for him.

_Rose asked me 2 remind u we're only a phonecall away – Em_

I loved my big brother! He knew my father and I hadn't been getting along lately. I quickly replied.

_Expect 2 c a lot of me :p Missed my big brother around – B_

_Friend's been a great help. Taking a break now. Thnx & sorry – B_

_Survived class. On my way home now. I'm beat. U on fb? – E_

I sent him my e-mail address so he could easily find me.

_:S__ Looks like sis has friend over. Have 2 b polite but her friends r so flaky – E_

_Explain. Can't b that bad – B_

_Only talk about guys & clothes and their flirting is too obvious, I can't stand it – E_

_Sorry, I'm not good company atm 2, youtubing :p – B_

At that, I heard someone chuckle as they came up the stairs.

'That'll be my brother', Alice sighed, 'I hope he behaves, he's been bugging me all weekend.'

I laughed, 'I haven't see my brother enough for him to bug me.'

'Lucky for you', she mumbled, but I saw a smile playing around her lips.

Surely he couldn't be that bad. I mean, Emmett and I would tease each other – a lot – but I loved him nontheless. And it was only because for the past three years he'd been living here, that we tried to make the best of the time we did get to spend together. I was sure he'd be 'bugging' me a bit more since I moved here too.

'Hey, no making fun of big brothers,' a voice sounded from the hallway, 'we only want to protect our little... sisters...', he trailed off at the end.

I looked up, curious as to why he sounded so strange, yet also, quite familiar. I looked up to find the most amazing green eyes locked on me in shock. Those green eyes. _His _eyes. What the f...? This couldn't be happening, could it? Was he...?

'Eddie,' Alice broke the silence, 'this is my friend Bella. She just moved here, so behave. B, this is my brother Edward.'

I was so fucked.


	8. Fucked

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or the characters. They're all Stephenie Meyer's invention. I just love to incorporate them into the figments of my own imagination.**

**Common pairings. All human.**

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8. Fucked

I was so fucked.

Of course I knew she was in high school. But I'd been secretly hoping she was a senior. I never expected her to be here, in my house, in my little sister's room.

I was so fucked.

I had spent all weekend and all of today texting her. Today her texts were short and to the point, but when she got home from school, the flirting started again. She'd said she was studying with a friend. I'd asked if she was on Facebook and she'd given me her e-mail address. I was definitely looking her up later. Then I'd gotten a text from my sister.

_When u get home: behave. Got a new friend over – A_

Great. That's what I needed. Another girl to listen to while they gushed over shopping and the latest Hollywood heartthrob. That wasn't even that bad, I could tune that out or hide in my room. What's worse was that her friends would try to flirt with me, even though I made it clear I wasn't interested. They were just too shallow. I didn't want a high school girl.

_Well, not _any_ high school girl._

True, there was one exeption to that rule.

So, I texted Bella about my impending predicament and she replied saying she was having a shallow moment as well. I couldn't help but chuckle as I made my way to my room.

'That'll be my brother', I heard my sister sigh, 'I hope he behaves, he's been bugging me all weekend.'

Then I heard someone laugh, 'I haven't see my brother enough for him to bug me.'

Her voice sounded oddly familiar.

'Hey, no making fun of big brothers,' I commented as I walked into my sister's room, 'we only want to protect our little... sisters...'

My mouth dropped open and my eyes must have been bugging out of their sockets.

Because there, on my sister's bed, there _she_ was. Petite frame, brown hair with, I noticed now, a hint of red in it... I couldn't help but gape. Then she looked up and caught me staring. I kept looking at those big brown eyes and lucious lips I had kissed only a few nights ago.

'Eddie,' my sister started, 'this is my friend Bella. She just moved here, so behave. B, this is my brother Edward.'

I was so fucked.

Alice was looking at me expectantly, raising an eyebrow to silently warn me to behave. I mumbled a quick greeting and hastily made my way to my room, claiming to having to write a paper. As I closed my door I sighed and closed my eyes.

I thought about the situation for a minute. I'd known Bella was in high school. No surprise there. That also meant there would be the possibility of her getting to know my sister. So finding her here was not that unexpected. So she'd befriended my sister. What was wrong with that? Nothing. If anything, it might make it easier to get to know her. Of course I'd have to be careful not to hurt Alice's feelings in the matter, but she'd understand. Right? While I pondered this, I heard a car leaving. Looking out my window I noticed it was Alice's yellow Porsche 911 Turbo.

Yes, the spoiled brat had gotten a Porsche for her Sweet Sixteen last year. When I first found out I was quite envious, of course. I mean, she didn't even know anything about cars, what did she need a Porsche for? But then it dawned on me. Just a few months before, Jasper had gotten an Aston Martin V12 Vanquish. Courtesy of one of his father's guilt trips. Alice had been drooling over the combination ever since. Truth be told, Jasper had been getting more attention ever since he was first spotted in his new car. But instead of continuing said drooling, she decided she could match him and reverse the roles. Quite cunning, actually, that sister of mine. It worked like a charm and Jasper had been following her like a little puppy the entire party, begging for a ride in her new car. Any other guy would have been wanting a ride because of the awesome car and the fact that it belonged to a sixteen-year-old girl, but for Jasper it was the combination and even the girl that were more alluring than the car itself. Eventually she'd granted him the ride, but then both of them turned out to be too shy to do anything else.

I decided I might as well start to work on the essay I used as an excuse earlier and opened my laptop. While it was starting up, I texted Bella.

_Wow, that was unexpected. U okay? – E_

No response. Oh well, I'd wait.

First thing I did was log on to my Facebook account and add her. Might as well. I typed _bella0912__, _hit enter and _Isabella Marie Swan_ popped onto my screen. No. Fucking. Way. _Swan_? What were the odds? I clicked _Add as friend_ before going to her profile. Apparently she'd used her birthday in her e-mail address. She was seventeen. Cute picture, though. She didn't have that many friends, just some people in London, and a few others. She was yet to change her current location; it was still set as _London, United Kingdom_. I went to check her info page.

_Siblings: Emmett McCarty Swan_.

I was so fucked.


	9. Complication

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or the characters. They're all Stephenie Meyer's invention. I just love to incorporate them into the figments of my own imagination.**

**Common pairings. All human.**

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9. Complication

_Wow, that was unexpected. U okay? __– E_

Uhm... most definitely not! What did he expect?! I came here to study with a girl I had just befriended today. How was I to know I'd been kissing her brother just days earlier?

When he had made his escape, no doubt I'd been blushing furiously.

'Weirdo,' Alice muttered, 'Now, where were we?', she continued.

This was getting too awkward. How long would it take for her to find out there was something up with me and Edward? And how would she react? I didn't want to find out just yet. I really liked Alice and didn't want to ruin it by gawking after her brother.

'Actually, I need to get home,' I hurried to say, 'I forgot I promised my mom I'd be home in time to help her with dinner.'

She looked a little disappointed, but offered to give me a ride. I felt bad for leaving like that, it wasn't her fault after all. So when we were safely on our way, I apologized.

'Sorry about the weirdness earlier...', I started.

'Yeah, what was up with that?', Alice interrupted me, 'Did you loose track of time? Oh well, it doesn't really matter, we got a lot of work done anyway. I hope you had fun, though. How are you getting to school? I noticed you don't have a car. Does your mom drive you? If you want you can ride with me. It's not that far out of the way and since we have half our classes together...'

Sche rambled on, upbeat as ever. She reminded me a little of a fairy, she was so tiny, perky and happy. Now I was really starting to feel bad. This girl had been nothing but nice to me.

'Alice?', I interrupted her.

''Ssup, B?', she sang.

'I'm sorry...'

'What for?'

'I think I know why your brother was acting so weird...'

'How would you know that? You barely spoke.'

'Well, last weekend I went to a party with my brother. A frat party. And I met him there.'

'No, you didn't?!', she exclaimed, 'Oh, sweetie, I'm so sorry, he...'

'No, no, he actually helped me when this guy sort of attacked me.'

'Wait, are you the girl he saved from Tyler?'

'I guess so...'

A knowing look came across her face, but she let the subject drop. I had absolutely no idea what she might've been thinking, but I could only hope she'd still want to be friends.

Things couldn't get any worse, right?

We arrived at my house.

'Thanks for the ride,' I said before getting out of the car, 'I guess I'll see you at school tomorrow. Again, I'm s...'

But before I could apologize once more, she turned to me and said, 'I'll pick you up at 7.45, okay?'

I nodded and went inside.

'Hi, sweetheart, how was your first day?', mom asked when I walked into the kitchen.

'Fine. I'm ahead in most classes, gym sucks and I think I've already made a friend,' I said, forcing a smile, 'She's picking me up for school tomorrow.'

'Oh, that's nice. Why don't you ask her to come over tomorrow after school?'

After dinner I excused myself and went to my room. I needed to buy a copy of _Wuthering Heights_ and wanted to check my e-mail. I hadn't gotten around to it since the move. I placed my order and logged onto gmail. There were a few e-mails from some of my friends in London; Jacob, Leah and Kim. I sent them a quick reply, promising an extended update later in the week. Next in my inbox was a notification from Facebook.

_Edward Anthony Cullen has added you as a friend._

A time check told me he had added me after his last text. This ought to be a good sign, right? I logged onto my account and clicked on the friend request. _Two mutual friends._ Who could that be? *click* _Emmett McCarty Swan. Rosalie Lilian Hale._

Correction: things could definitely get worse.

I was so fucked.


	10. Interrogation

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or the characters. They're all Stephenie Meyer's invention. I just love to incorporate them into the figments of my own imagination.**

**Common pairings. All human.**

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10. Interrogation

When Alice came home after dropping Bella off, she stormed into my room.

'You could've told me the girl from Friday night was in my class! Can you believe how embarrassing that was for us? You're an idiot!', she yelled at me.

I put up my hands in defense. She might be tiny, but my sister was one frightening little pixie.

'Ali, believe me, I'm as surprised as you are.'

'You honestly want me to believe you didn't know?'

'Well, I knew she was in high school, but what are the odds?'

'Apparently, pretty high', she muttered.

Her anger was wavering, I could tell, as she quieted down and her eyes took on a thoughtfull expression. I glanced around nervously.

'So...'

'What happened Friday?'

_What's with the interrogation?_

'What's it to you?'

'She's my friend. I like her. She doesn't know anyone else here, since she just moved. And she kept on apologizing in the car. _And_ I'm your sister, you know, the one you keep bugging about your best friend? I think that gives me a right to know. Plus, considering how obnoxious you've been regarding me and Jasper _all_ weekend, I think I deserve to let you sweat for a minute or two', she smirked.

I sighed. She was right. I deserved this. I'd been a jerk to her, now it was time for payback.

'Not much happened, really. I got rid of Tyler for her. He's a lame ass jerk who can't hold his liquor. I helped her clean up and after that we went for a walk. We started talking and then I kissed her.'

Alice crossed her arms and gave me a stern look.

'That's it?'

'That's it. We've just been texting a bit.'

'Hm, I was wondering who she'd been texting all day... What about?'

Was she seriously questioning me?

'I mean, what kind of texts? Like the ones you send a friend, or flirty, or the kind where you try to get in her pants?'

I couldn't believe this. She was actually second guessing my motives. Not that I could really blame here. She'd only ever seen that side of me. Still, I'd hoped she'd be a little more observant.

'Pix, haven't you been paying attention?'

Alice glared at me. I knew she hated that nickname. Well, what are big brothers for? Nontheless, I gulped. Like I said, frightening.

'What I mean is, yeah, I know, I've been a jerk when it comes to girls. But if you'd been watching more closely, instead of lusting after Jasper all the time' – another sisterly glare – 'you would've noticed that I haven't been hooking up in a while. Hell, that party was the first in months!'

'You're saying Sexward's been on a dry spell? Yeah right! Girls practically throw themselves at you! Do I need to remind you of the hoochies I've been scaring out of the house? Let's see, there's Tanya... that Russian girl Irina, Lauren... Carmen, that skank Victoria – by the way: ew, what were you thinking? She's horrible! – Kate... do I need to go on?', she smiled sarcastically.

Point taken. I admit, I'd been getting around before. A lot. Not to sound cocky, but I'm not exactly hideous. I wouldn't go as far as Alice just did, saying girls threw themselves at me, but it's always been quite easy to hook up. And I'd been taking advantage of that. Who wouldn't? However, the examples she chose to illustrate her point weren't exactly the ones I took pride in, if you can even call it that. I physically winced when she mentioned Victoria. That girl had been causing trouble ever since she first crossed my path. I claimed a temporary lapse of judgment in that case.

Alice was right, though. I'd never been serious about any of them. They were merely conquests at best, but mostly just a way to pass the time. No wonder the nickname _Sexward_ had come into fashion in my junior year of high school.

How could I explain to Alice that Bella was different? Like she'd said, she was her friend. Knowing Alice, she was going to be protective of her. She always made it clear to her friends that their eyebatting and _drooling_, as she liked to call it, were condoned and somewhat appreciated – I mean, it was always a little flattering – but nevertheless a waste of time. I didn't date. And even if I would, I didn't want to date any of Alice's friends. Or high school girls. Like I texted Bella earlier, they were too flaky, shallow and immature.

With Bella, however the situation was different. I felt like I'd really made a connection with her, her age not even being an issue. Yes, I'd gotten hard upon seeing her wearing my shirt, but what guy wouldn't? There was something extremely sexy about a cute girl wearing your clothes. The main thing was that I didn't do anything with it, because I didn't want to ruin any chance I might have had with this girl. The thought itself amazed even me, so I wasn't sure how to explain it to my sister. Best be completely honest, maybe she'd understand and not try to prevent me from getting to know her better.

'Alice, I haven't tried to hook up with Bella.'

'What, you don't think she's pretty?'

She actually thought I'd get with any pretty girl? She didn't seem to notice my hurt expression, because she continued relentlessly.

'That's insane! I've seen you with these skanky girls, and now...'

'No! That's not what I meant. Of course I think she's hot! Come on, have you seen her? She's gorgeous! It's just, I don't know, I actually _felt_ something when I was with her. I... I didn't want to ruin it...', I sighed.

Alice looked at me incredulously.

'You're serious, aren't you?', she asked.

I just nodded.

'Wow', she mouthed.

'I know.'

'So, what are you gonna do?'

'I don't know...'

'Why not? You just said you've been texting with her.'

'Things just got a little more complicated.'

Alice looked at me, puzzled.

'Do you know her last name?'

'Bella Swan... Oh!'

Understanding dawned in her eyes.

'Yeah, I just found out she's Emmett's little sister.'

At that, Alice started laughing hysterically.

'Eddie, you are so fucked!'

'I know', I sighed, exasperated.

'Em is gonna kill you!'


	11. Sixpack of beer and two pizzas

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or the characters. They're all Stephenie Meyer's invention. I just love to incorporate them into the figments of my own imagination.**

**Common pairings. All human.**

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11. Sixpack of beer and two pizzas

Even though Alice thought the entire situation was pretty hilarious, I was scared shitless. My original fear – her age – seemed so insignificant now. So long as my intentions were sincere, Alice was going to be completely supportive, she'd promised. I think she welcomed both the change in my demeanor and the shift of focus away from her and Jasper. Whatever.

My main concern now was Emmett. Unlike Jasper, he hadn't grown up with me. The latter was my childhood best friend. We grew up together and shared everything that went with that. To top that, his parents divorced around the same time my mother died. We became even closer, almost like family. And he truly was like a brother to me. Which was why I didn't mind the whole situation with Alice. I knew he was a good guy. He actually helped me calm down in my hour of need. He'd always been a quiet kid, but after the divorce he became terribly shy. Which was a stark contrast with my rebelling. We were an unexpected pair, but we worked. If I had fallen for Rosalie he would probably back me up, because he knew where I came from.

_Wait a minute, back up... did you jast say _fallen for_? Seriously?_

Uhm... I guess so.

_Dude, you met her just a few days ago. When you both had been drinking. And you've been stressed out ever since you saw her in your sister's room._

I know, but it's just... I _felt _something when I was with her. I _never_ feel anything when I'm with a girl. But this girl had been in my every thought since I met her. I couldn't explain it. She just was. There was something intruiging about her and I couldn't put my finger on it. But I was intent on finding out.

_Maybe it's a Swan thing._

Which brought me to my current fear. Emmett was going to kill me! Unlike Jasper, he hadn't known me his whole life. We only met when he moved here. We all just started as freshmen and we had a few classes together. When Emmett, Jasper and I had to do a group project together, we just clicked. Jasper's calm, Emmett's goofyness and my... I don't know, wild side, arrogance, whatever you want to call it... complemented each other. Pretty soon, the three of us were inseperable. People actually started to refer to us as _The Three Musketeers_.

After a while, Emmett had confessed he'd fallen in love with Jasper's sister Rosalie. At first it was a little weird, having her around more. But then again, being twins, Jasper and Rosalie had always been close and it wasn't exactly a huge change. She had her own friends and we all liked her. We just told Emmett to keep the gory details to himself. We didn't want any explicit visuals of our sister/almost step-sister.

But the situation regarding Rosalie was so different from te one regarding Bella.

Like I said, Emmett had only known the me from college. By then, I was already ruined by past experiences and carefully groomed into the cocky man-whore version of me. Yes, _Sexward_. Jasper new the real me, the old me. And even though Emmett learned that _Sexward_ was mainly a façade, he knew I'd never been serious about any girl. I'd never had a girlfriend, just a lot of extracurricular fucking. We all joked about it and they acted as my wingmen when I was seducing yet another one. It was a good way to pass the time and a great source for storytelling.

How would the guys react when I told them I met a girl who changed everything?

How would Emmett react when he found out said girl was his little sister?

He had told us about his sister before; that he missed her, was very protective of her, and how excited he was that she was moving here.

He was going to freak out!

How to handle this?

I figured I'd probably talk to Jasper first. Maybe he'd offer a fresh view of the situation. At least he'd be able to calm me down somewhat.

_Jazz, wanna hang out? Need some 3M perspective – E_

_Sure, b there in 20. Want me 2 call Em? – J_

_No it's about him. Need 2 talk 2 u 1st – E_

_Something happen w/ Em? – J_

_Indirectly. Will explain when u get here – E_

Fifteen minutes later, cue doorbell and enter Jasper with a sixpack of beer and two frozen pizzas. While we waited for the pizzas to be done, we opened the first beers and made some small talk. When the pizzas were crispy and their aroma filled the kitchen, we took them up to my room and settled on the floor, leaning against my bed.

'So... spill', Jasper said as he practically inhaled his first slice.

The amounts this guy could eat never ceased to amaze me. He rivalled Emmett, but his skinny ass never showed it. It was hard to believe.

'I fucked up big time and Em is gonna kill me when he finds out!'

There was no denying it anymore.

'Why? What happened?', Jasper asked, surprised.

Of course he was surprised. Emmett was huge and intimidating, but he hardly ever lost his temper. Surely I must have done something particularly offending to be dreading his wrath and anger.

'What the hell did you do and how come I don't know about it?', he continued.

'Well, do you remember when I told you about Friday night?', I started hesitantly.

He nodded, 'The girl you rescued from Crowley.'

'Yes. Well, there's more to it.'

He motioned for me to continue.

'I sort of ended up kissing her.'

'And this is a problem because...?'

'She's in high school.'

'Again, I fail to see the issue. So, she's a little younger. Big deal. If she were just a score, you wouldn't be so stressed out by it. Obviously, you care. At least to some extent.'

This was why it was a good idea to talk to Jasper first.

'It's not that simple,' I interjected, 'Today I came across two complications. The first being she's in Alice's class and started to hang out here.'

Jasper exhaled heavily and gave me a sympathetic look.

'Did Pix scare you off?'

'Not exactly. She was upset at first, but mostly because she thought we'd been keeping it a secret. But we didn't know until I ran into her here. So when she realized that, _and_ made sure I wasn't going to use her, she came around. Now I think she's actually excited', I chuckled.

'So, basically, you're telling me you met this girl you really like – which is a first – who's friends with Pix, who's fine with it.'

I nodded.

'Forgive me, but I fail to see what the problem is and how Emmett's involved.'

'Well... I also found out that she's Emmett's little sister.'

True to fashion, Jasper choked on his beer. That's the second time this week and the second time after a sister of ours was mentioned. This was becoming a habit.

'Are you kidding me?', he managed to blurt out between coughs.

'Afraid not', I said while patting his back.

When he regained his ability to speak, Jasper agreed that Emmett would probably be less than thrilled about this development.

'But I think it also depends on how you tell him and what your intentions are,' he offered, 'So why don't you explain it to me first?'

I ran a hand through my hair and pinched the bridge of my nose in an attempt to relieve some of the tension, before I started my explanation.

I divulged the tale of meeting her, the consequent texting and the surprise to find her in my house earlier today. Then I told him how I couldn't stop thinking about her, wanting to get to know her, to see her again. And more importantly: how I hadn't tried to take advantage of her, how I wanted more than just sex, how I hadn't even thought of her in that way.

'I think you really need to stress that point when talking to Em,' Jasper suggested, 'If you want to I can be there when you tell him, lestening the blow, offer a third perspective...'

I hated to admit it, but I was relieved that he offered to and I didn't have to ask. Having Jasper present during the confrontation could only help.


	12. Sisterly bonding

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or the characters. They're all Stephenie Meyer's invention. I just love to incorporate them into the figments of my own imagination.**

**Common pairings. All human.**

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12. Sisterly bonding

I was more nervous about my second day at school than I was about my first. Alice knew. Edward probably knew too, seeing as he added me on Facebook. I had accepted, but hadn't texted him back yet. Soon, Emmett would find out and I really didn't want to know what to expect there. I fidgeted nervously with my sweater while I waited for Alice to pick me up. At precisely 7.45, a honk sounded and I rushed out the door. Alice flashed me a brilliant smile upon opening the passengerside door. I guess she either chose to ignore what happened yesterday or just didn't care.

Last night, after accepting Edward's friend request, I did some light Facebook stalking, which included adding Alice, Jessica, Angela, Mike and Ben. I also figured out Edward was not only an acquaintance of my brother, but on of his best friends; a picture of three guys acting goofy, titled _The Three Musketeers_, in which Edward was tagged, clued me in. Emmett had told me quite a bit about his friends, but I hadn't pieced it together until now and I hadn't really looked at all the pictures before. I had also noticed he had a lot of people on his profile and a lot of them were girls. Hm. I wasn't sure what to make of that yet.

'Morning, B!', a cheerful Alice greeted me.

I grinned at her.

'Would you like to hang out at my place after school today?', I asked and she agreed.

School was again uneventful. Until lunch.

'So, Bella,' Jessica started, 'I heard you went over to Alice's yesterday after school.'

Ben and Mike rolled their eyes. Obviously they knew where the conversation was headed. I nodded.

'So...,' she continued, eyeing me suggestively, 'did you meet Edward?'

Of course, my blush gave me away.

Jessica started giggling, 'Yeah, I know, positively drool-worthy, right?'

'Well, I only met him for a grand total of five seconds, so I really wouldn't know.'

This earned me curious looks from Jessica and Angela and eye rolls from the guys, while Alice shot me a knowing smirk. Why was I downplaying it? Right, because after yesterday's London-interrogation, I wasn't sure if I was ready for Jessica's Edward-related questioning. Alice seemed to sense my discomfort, because she quickly changed the subject.

'You guys, we really need to get together to make the final arrangements for the party.'

Jessica was instantly distracted as she started to grill Mike and Ben about their wardrobe choices.

'My brother and I are hosting a Halloween party this weekend. Of course you're invited too! The girls and I are coordinating our outfits, as are my brother and his friends, and Mike and Ben. We're having a sleepover after. You should definitely come too! We could make it a weekend... Jess, Ang, wanna go for a movie and ice creams Friday night?'- they nodded – 'Oh and we need to go shopping soon, like tomorrow? We've already got our outfits sorted, do you want in?'

She kept on talking about the party, shopping and the different movies that were playing until the bell rang. I was beginning to suspect Alice was even more excited about the planning and preparations than about the party itself.

After school we went to my house, where we found my mother waiting for us with tea and cookies. She quickly took to liking Alice, but honestly, she was just very likeable. When we asked if I could spend the weekend with her, she complied. Mentioning that Emmett would be there Saturday helped too, and she suggested I spend Sunday at his place. My parents probably weren't opposed to a quiet weekend together either, though I didn't want to think about that too much. Your parents having _quality time_... quite disturbing.

Later that night, as I had just gone to bed, my phone started buzzing on my nightstand. The display read _Rosalie Hale_. She wouldn't call me this late unless it was important, so I answered.

'Rose?', I croaked.

'Hey, sweetie, sorry I'm calling you at this hour. Did I wake you?'

'No, I just went to bed. What's up?'

'Well, I would've called earlier, but this is the first chance I got and I didn't want to text you about it, but... we had some friends over for dinner. My brother Jasper... and Edward.'

Uh-oh.

'And we had quite an interesting conversation...'

Gulp.

'Rose, I know why I'm whispering, but why are you?'

'Uhm, Em doesn't know I'm calling you. He wants to call you himself tomorrow, but I thought I'd give you a head's up.'

I had really grown to like Rosalie. The first couple of times we met, I was a little intimidated by her. She was just so breathtakingly beautiful, tall, blonde and statuesque, and very confident. But she treated me like a sister and a friend and we became closer. When we first found out I was moving here, she insisted to make their spare bedroom _my _room, so I could stay over whenever I wanted. We'd spent hours on Skype discussing color schemes, furniture and decorations. It made me wonder now how she and Alice got along. Rosalie and I were quickly becoming sisters, which explained why she'd want to warn me.

'Why? What happened?'

'Edward told us about the party.'

Fuck. Again: she wouldn't call if it wasn't important.

'How bad is it?'

'First, I'm curious to hear your version.'

This was another reason why I liked Rosalie more and more; she was the big sister I'd never had and encouraged me to confide her about things I felt uncomfortable about telling my brother. He might be my best friend, but he was still my, sometimes overprotective, big brother.

'I'm sure he told you how we met. He was just really nice to me, we kissed for a bit and when I left to meet up with you, he gave me his number. We've been texting and then yesterday I ran into him at a friend's place. Turns out he's her brother and one of Em's best friends.'

'That's pretty much what he told us too.'

'So how did Em take it?'

'He was pretty upset at first, you know, worrying about you. To be honest, Edward looked really scared. I guess my big Teddybear can be pretty scary.'

We both giggled at that. I knew he could be intimidating, but the nickname _Teddybear_ was very accurate.

Rosalie continued to give me a full account of the conversation they'd had.

'Don't worry about it, sweetie,' she said before wishing me goodnight, 'Talk to Em tomorrow and remember he means well. He's just protective because he loves you.'


	13. Thai takeout

**A/N: I'm sorry it took me a little longer to update this time. I've been struggling with the dialogue and energy of this chapter. I hope I got it right.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or the characters. They're all Stephenie Meyer's invention. I just love to incorporate them into the figments of my own imagination.**

**Common pairings. All human.**

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* * *

**

13. Thai take-out

Now I knew how Emmett must have felt when he told Jasper about Rosalie. I was beyond scared. I was terrified. I knew Emmett wasn't easily angered, but I also know how much he could bench press and the punches he could throw. I didn't really want that turned on me. I really hoped this dinner would go well and I'd be able to explain myself to him.

Jasper gave me an encouraging slap on the shoulder before knocking on the door; Rosalie let us in.

'Jazz, bro, 'ssup?', Emmett boomed from the couch.

They hadn't seen each other since mid-terms, except for a quick greeting at the party, and Emmett wanted to hear about Texas. He'd never been there. He held his fist out for us to bump. Rosalie emerged from the kitchen with four beers, just as we were sitting down, joining Emmett in his sports commentaries. I liked it when a girl would drink a beer, somehow it felt more relaxed.

'What's for dinner, sis?', Jasper asked.

'I'm making my famous Thai take-out', Rosalie winked.

I felt a little relieved. This meant we wouldn't need to sit at the diningroom table, which would've made it all the more formal.

When the food arrived the room grew silent, except for the sounds being emitted by the tv. Everyone knew better than to distract Emmett while eating; his food was very important to him. Besides, it was really good. When we were finished I went to get us another beer, working up the courage to broach the subject.

'So, Em, there's something I need to talk to you about', I started.

_Don't chicken out. He's your friend. __You should be able to discuss this._

'You know how I usually go about girls, right? No emotion, just… fun.'

He nodded, grinning. _Fun_ was an understatement. I saw Rosalie pull a face out of the corner of my eye. Obviously, she knew about my ways and didn't always like it.

'Well, I met this girl and I've got this feeling she might change that.'

That peaked his – and Rosalie's – curiosity. Jasper already knew, of course, and he motioned for me to continue.

'There was this girl at the party Friday, and I was just... drawn to her. Like, I _had_ to get to know her, you know? We started talking, and there was this _connection_, almost instantly. It felt really effortless and comfortable.'

Emmett seemed a little dumbfounded at my revelation; his beer was frozen midway between the table and his mouth. Obviously he wasn't expecting this. Rosalie looked at me sceptically. Like Jasper, she'd known me longer than Emmett, and she knew the truth behind the act. She sympathized to some extent, but that didn't keep her from scolding me for my behavior on a regular basis. She'd often tell me that 'being miserable doesn't justify acting like a jerk', which my sister would always wholeheartedly agree with.

'You're saying you went to a frat party and didn't hook up?', she verified.

I nodded.

Emmett laughed, 'Sexward's on a dry spell?'

I couldn't help but smile at that.

'That's what Alice said too. But I don't care. I'm over that. You know, that was the first party I went to this semester. I'm tired of all the games. Honestly', I added, because of the raised eyebrows I was facing.

'It's about time!', Emmett said, 'Your fooling around has been fun to watch, but I was wondering when it would get old. Glad to see you've come to your senses. So, who's this mystery girl that turned things around? We so owe her!'

This was the kind of reaction I'd hoped for, but hadn't expected. I could only hope he'd still be this excited when I continued.

'That's the thing. See, I wanna tell you all about her, but I think I'd better tell you how I feel about her first.'

'That bad, huh?'

'Yeah, but in a good way. I think the best way is to just tell you what happened. After I ran into you guys at the party, I saw her from across the room. Tyler was kind of bugging her, so I stepped in and got rid of him. He'd managed to get her soaked, so I offered to help her clean herself up. After that, we went for a walk outside. She was pretty shy but we started talking and... like I said... there was this connection. Then after a while she did the cutest thing: she thanked me for helping her, actually whispering in my ear. It was just so sweet, I _had_ to kiss her. So I did, and she kissed me back. When she went home I gave her my number and we'd been texting all weekend. And the thing is... I haven't been able to stop thinking about her.'

'Sounds like you've got a bit of a crush, Eddie', Rosalie said.

'Yeah, I haven't heard you talk about anyone like that before', Emmett added, 'But why didn't you tell us about this when you were here Saturday?'

'Guess I didn't want to jinx it.'

'But guys, remember what you just heard, and what you said about having a crush, Rose', Jasper cut in.

I shot him an appreciative glance. He was already rooting for me and trying to help.

'Okay... but so far it all sounds good. I don't get why you're so nervous about talking to us about this', Emmett said.

'Well, there's this little... complication. When we were talking, I of course asked her what she was majoring in, because I hadn't seen her before. She told me she doesn't go here, because she's still in high school. I didn't really give it that much thought, because I wasn't after a hook-up with her. I really want to get to know her, you know? Anyway, yesterday I got home and Alice had a new friend over. _Her_.'

'Wow. Awkward,' Emmett winced, 'So she's like, sixteen?'

'Seventeen, actually. But that's not even an issue, I think. Like I said, we've been texting, and I got the impression she was kind of interested too. Later I talked to Alice about it. I told her what I just told you and she's fine with it. She knows I've never felt like this before and that I haven't tried to take advantage of her.'

So far, the conversation was going well. I felt more confident that Emmett wouldn't get too upset once he found out who I was talking about.

'But then I added her on Facebook and I found out something else. Em, it's Bella.'

What was it with my friends choking on their beer when one of our sisters was mentioned? Emmett actually had beer coming out of his nostrils and his face turned red due to the lack of oxygen. Rosalie's jaw dropped as she looked from me to Jasper, who was smiling encouragingly, back to me.

'You kissed _my sister_?!', Emmett roared.

Maybe his face turned red because he was angry. My bad.

I was glad there was at least a coffeetable between us. Hopefully that would be enough of an obstacle to him for me to get away.

'Em, baby, try to calm down,' Rosalie cooed, 'Remember, he's your best friend.'

'I don't care! _Sexward_ put his tongue down _my_ _little sister_'s throat and for that he must die!'

Of course, that would be the only part of my speech he remembered.

'Nothing happened, Em, I swear! We kissed _once_ and...'

'You're not getting in her pants, you hear me?! Bella's not one of your regular girls. She's my _baby_ sister...'

'Honey, she's seventeen,' Rosalie interjected, 'She's not a little girl anymore.'

Before he could counter that, Jasper silenced him.

'Didn't you hear a word Edward just said? He's been eating himself up over this! And I know for a fact he hasn't talked to her since he found out she's your sister, because he wanted to talk to you first. You gotta respect that.'

'But... you know what Edward's like with girls. You said so yourself, man! I don't want that for her.'

'Of course you don't, baby, but you haven't known Edward as long as me and Jazz have. We knew him before he got so fucked up – sorry, Eddie – and even you know he's a good guy underneath it all.'

'Besides, it's not like he's the only one who caught sight of one of our sisters', Jasper added while motioning towards Rosalie.

It wasn't exactly the same situation, but it was an argument Emmett couldn't argue with. Jasper had him cornered, and he knew it.

'Just sleep on it, talk to Bella tomorrow and see what _she_ has to say about it, okay?', Rosalie told him, 'You can't tell her what to do, but you _can_ be her big brother and her friend.'

'Fine,' he huffed, 'But you don't go near her until she decides to, you hear me? You're my best friend, but I will _kill_ you if you ever hurt her.'


	14. Overthinking things

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or the characters. They're all Stephenie Meyer's invention. I just love to incorporate them into the figments of my own imagination.**

**Common pairings. All human.**

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* * *

**

14. Overthinking things

I spent a lot of time at Alice's that week. I'd quickly grown very comfortable there. The nerves coursing through me and my heart pounding loudly in my chest almost the entire time due to the close proximity to Edward... I welcombed it even. It had all become part of my daily routine. Alice had become a friend in a matter of days and I honestly liked her very much. Wednesday, when I stayed for dinner, I had met her father, dr. Cullen. He was very welcoming and insisted I call him Carlisle. I tried. And slipped up a lot. Comparing his fair hair and Alice's dark, spikey do, I wondered where Edward had gotten his bronze locks from, as well as his green eyes. Alice definitely shared her father's piercing blue stare and I was glad Edward wasn't present during that particular dinner, because I wasn't sure how much I could keep from Alice and her father combined. They both seemed very perceptive.

Of course, I didn't mind seeing Edward when I spent time with Alice, but I didn't want her to think I was using her to get to her brother. Like I said, she was my friend. And having him around also caused some slightly embarrassing situations. Like me losing my train of thought, midway through a sentence. Or getting even more clumsy. I had already managed to break a few glasses and fall down the stairs. I was just a little jittery, dropping anything I was holding. The falling down happened Wednesday night, when I was about to go home.

After dinner, Alice had wanted me to try on my costume, to see if she needed to make any alterations by Saturday, before driving me home. I was just walking down the stairs, when Edward walked through the front door. His hair was disheveled and a few pieces were sticking to his forehead. The UW t-shirt he was wearing clung to his torso, obviously drenched in sweat, but thereby emphasizing his muscular build. As he came through the door he pulled the earbuds of his I-pod out of his ears and his lips turned up in that crooked grin I had already memorized. Still, my breath caught.

'Hey sis', he called.

Alice was too busy talking to me about the clothes we'd bought earlier that day to respond and instead just waved at him.

Then, he looked straight at me, 'Hi Bella.'

I was so caught off guard, I missed the last couple of steps. I would've fallen flat on my face if it hadn't been for Edward. He shot forward and managed to catch me just as I was bracing myself for the inevitable impact. I heard Alice shriek, but it was muffled as I was lost in Edward's eyes, full of concern, and a little humour.

'You okay?', he asked and I nodded.

Talk about déjà vu.

'That's the second time this week that I'm picking you off the floor', he snickered, as I felt the blood rush to my cheeks.

'I think she's able to stand by herself now', Alice muttered.

Edward was still holding me up, his arms wrapped around me, my nose inches from his neck. I could smell him, and even though he was sweaty, it wasn't repulsive. On the contrary, it had a sweet, almost musky undertone to it. Edward held me for just a few seconds longer, before placing me back on my feet and releasing me. He looked like he wanted to say something else, but Alice grabbed my arm and pulled me out of the house. Once in the car she turned to me, a concerned look on her face.

'Are you sure you're okay?'

I shrugged.

'Sure. Falling down is a common occurance with me. You should probably get used to it. I'm surprised I survived this long here without any bruises,' I laughed, 'I'm just such a clutz. By the way, sorry again about the glasses, I hope they weren't too expensive.'

'Are you kidding me?! I'm glad you broke them. They were hideous!', she exclaimed, wrinkling her nose in disgust.

'Then why did you have them? I mean, your whole house looks so tasteful and...'

'Thanks. Esme did most of that. She's my dad's fiancée – well, not yet, but it won't be long anyhow – and she's an interior designer. That's actually how they met, when she was still married and Edward hadn't even been born yet... Anyway, after my mom died, she and my dad got really close and she's been like a mother to me ever since. You know she helped me do my room? She's really nice! Last summer I worked at her office for a while, getting to know the business a bit. It's not the same as fashion, but it was a nice way to get my bearings in the field a little. I mean, design is design, right? She's also got two kids, they're Edward's age. You probably know Rosalie? Yeah, she's awesome! We go shopping sometimes, I love her style! She can definitely pull it off, too. Have you seen her body, it's like a supermodel's, only healthy, like with boobs and a nice ass.'

I couldn't get a word in, so I just nodded at appropriate times.

'Anyway, those glasses... Don't worry about it. They've been an eyesore to me and Esme ever since we got them, but they were a gift from one of my aunts. She really has the worst taste, but she's a sweet thing, so we couldn't bring ourselves to returning them. We usually don't use them, except when she visits. I don't know why I got them out tonight, I must've not been paying attention. Anyway, I'm glad you broke them, now I can buy some nice ones with Esme.'

With that, she pulled into my driveway. She had chattered away the entire ride, thankfully avoiding the topic of me stumbling into Edward's arms.

I was glad it was already quite late. I could claim being tired and go to bed. I needed to think.

Emmett had texted me Wednesday during lunch, asking me to come over after school. As I'd already made plans to go shopping with Alice, I told him I couldn't come. A few minutes later he called me. He started to make smalltalk, obviously somewhat uncomfortable bringing the subject up over the phone.

'Look, Em, I have class in about ten minutes and I'm ditching my friends here. Is there something you wanted to talk about?'

That came out a little more annoyed than I'd intended, but hopefully it did the trick.

'Uhm... well, I... uhm... I know what happened Friday!', he blurted out.

Silence.

Did he expect me to respond to that? I decided to play dumb. I wanted to hear _him_ say what was bothering him, even though I knew what it was.

'What do you mean?'

'You know, about Edward... kissing you.'

'Oh, that.'

I heard him gulp and stifled laughter. Even though I hadn't been looking forward to this particular conversation, I couldn't pass up the opportunity to mess with my brother for a while.

'_Oh, that_?!', he quoted me, 'Bells, I know you just moved here and all, but you can't be completely ignorant...'

'Ignorant?'

'I'm sorry. What I mean is, you must've heard at least _some_ stories.'

'That's right, Em, _stories_.'

'They're not all rumours, B, most of them are actually true. I should know, he's my friend, I was there for a lot of it.'

'If he's your friend, then why are you talking bad about him?', I challenged.

'I'm not. I'm just trying to protect you. He's a great guy to hang out with, but his track record with girls isn't something to be proud of. I'm just looking out for my little sister.'

'As much as I appreciate that, your judgment isn't flawless. Remember Jacob?'

Last year, when Emmett and Rosalie came over during their spring break, he'd gotten into a fight with Jacob. He thought he had the wrong intentions and wanted to defend my honor. When in reality, we'd been just friends. He'd seen me go through the awkward stages of being a teenager, and vice versa. We knew too many embarrassing things about each other to ever be more than friends. Emmett had a tendency to overreact when it concerned me.

'Yeah, yeah,' he grumbled, 'but this is different. I actually _know_ Edward. Look, just be careful and try to stay away from him. At least for now.'

'I'll see what I can do. But I _will_ run into him eventually, so don't go acting all miffed when that happens.'

'Okay,' he agreed, then mumbled something that sounded like 'probably scared him off anyway' under his breath. I didn't want to argue any more with him, so I let it slide.

'Oh, by the way, can I come over Sunday? I'm staying at Alice's Friday and Saturday and I think mom and dad wanted the house to themselves for the weekend.'

I grimaced. Emmett probably did too.

'I _so_ don't want to know what Charlie and Renee are up to,' he complained, 'Yeah, sure, come over, you know we're happy to have you... Wait... You're staying at Alice's?'

'Yeah, they're having a party, remember? I'm invited too and Alice wanted to make it a sleep over. Anyway, I've got to go. See you Saturday.'

'See ya, Bells. And remember what I said...'

Lying in bed, I was replaying his words in my head. Emmett had warned me about stories involving Edward being true and him having a doubtful reputation. But he never specified.

Monday, Alice had apologized for something she thought had happened Friday. But she didn't specify either.

So what was I going to make of that? I only knew what I had experienced first-hand.

He had come to my aid when he didn't need to, acted a little protective and managed to charm me with one look.

_No, not charm._

You're right, _charm_ didn't cover it.

When he smiled at me, every time so far, it was like my brain ceased to function. I couldn't form any coherent sentences, reaffirmed my clumsiness... he was _dazzling_.

Was he even aware of it? He must have been... Why else would Jessica call him _drool-worthy_?

I started trying to connect all these little pieces of information.

If Edward knew about his looks and dazzling abilities – and why wouldn't he? – he must also know how to use them. If that were the case, why would Alice apologize to me? Because she thought he'd been trying to take advantage of me? That would certainly explain why Emmett wanted me to be careful. My brother was one of the most loyal people I knew. He wouldn't talk ill of his friends if he didn't have a good reason to. Admitted, he had been wrong about Jacob, but that was because he didn't know him, or how our friendship worked. He trusted his instincts, and to the objective onlooker it might have seemed confusing. So if he was trying to protect me from one of his _friends_, he must really be serious. I'd be a fool not to listen to him.

On the other hand, the way Edward acted towards me contradicted that.

What was I going to do?


	15. Thinking things over

**A/N: Sorry it took me so long to update. I was at my parents' for a few days so I couldn't type it all out. I was also struggling with this chapter's content a bit. I hope I got the vibe right, because I really wanted to give an insight in the workings of Edward's mind and his relationship with Alice in this one. Let me know how I did.**

**Disclaimer: I don't own Twilight or the characters. They're all Stephenie Meyer's invention. I just love to incorporate them into the figments of my own imagination.**

**Common pairings. All human.**

**

* * *

**

15. Thinking things over

At first I'd been relieved by Emmett's final reaction. For a moment I had feared he'd get stuck in his secondary response, the one where he wanted to beat the crap out of me for going after his sister. Not like I didn't have it coming.

_You're kidding me, right? Do you honestly believe you're nothing more than Sexward, the jerk? You just spent two nights in a row explaining yourself to your sister and your friends. Don't go back on your word now. Emmett should not want to kill y__ou and you know it!_

Geez, thanks?

So yeah, after giving it some more thought, I decided to prove Emmett wrong. I could be a good guy. Wasn't I one underneath the whole cocky act? Rosalie and Jasper seemed to believe so.

_Shut up! You know you are. You just have to prove it._

Right. So, how was I going to do that?

The way I saw it, I had two choices.

One. I could do as Emmett had demanded and stay away from Bella. That would ensure Emmett's goodwill and maybe, eventually, if he found I had actually changed, he'd allow me to pursue his sister. I considered that, but pretty soon thought of so many cons, they outweighed that single pro. For starters, who was to say Bella was even as interested as I had thought her to be? It wasn't like she had responded to any message I had sent her since Monday night. Furthermore, I had no guarantee Emmett would change his mind. There was also the immense risk someone else would take notice of Bella – though I was sure that had already happened – and ask her out. She might be taken by the time I was allowed near her. I didn't see how that got me any further.

Two. I could ignore Emmett's command and continue trying to get to know Bella. If she let me. That little detail aside, this option looked so much better to me than the other one. True, I wasn't sure what Bella's take on things was, but it couldn't hurt to let her know I was genuine in my feelings regarding her. Nothing ventured, nothing gained, right? If Emmett got angry with me, I'd deal with it.

Wednesday, after my afternoon class, I dropped my bag off at home and quickly changed into sweats and a t-shirt. I left a note for whoever would be cooking today saying I wouldn't be home for dinner and went over to Jasper's. We hung out for a while before going to the park for a run. I liked running around dinnertime; the park quieted down, allowing me to be alone with my thoughts, and not tripping over strollers and toddlers. We didn't talk about my situation with Bella and Emmett; Jasper must've sensed I wasn't in the mood to discuss it, thinking it over. He offered to drop me off at home, but I wasn't tired yet, so I decided to continue my run home. As I turned onto the driveway I finally felt satisfied: not only had I made up my mind, but I was also drenched in sweat from my run and a pleasurable soreness in my legs was announcing its presence by next morning. I walked through the door, grinning profusely while pulling out the earbuds to my I-pod.

That's when I saw Bella and my sister coming down the stairs, talking about shopping. Well, Alice did all the talking, while Bella just smiled and nodded.

'Hey sis', I called, she waved back.

Then my eyes locked on Bella. She looked absolutely stunning. I didn't know the U-Prep uniform could look so good!

Sure, Alice had used every loophole in the rules regarding attire to customize hers – she hated that the uniform prevented her to be as fashionminded in school as she'd like – and Rosalie's curvy body could make a garbage bag look like it came off a runway, but Bella....

She wore the blue plaid and pleated skirt short – almost too short – showing off slender yet toned legs, disappearing in black Allstars. Instead of the white button down shirt, which never seemed to fit anyone properly, she'd opted for a blue longsleeved shirt under a white Tommy Hilfiger t-shirt. She looked quite comfortable wearing the uniform, like she was used to it. Of course, she'd lived in London for the last few years. Did she wear a uniform there too? I'd have to check her Facebook to see if she had any pictures of that...

She caught my stare, effectively cutting off my train of thought.

'Hi Bella', I said softly.

She seemed startled somehow, or just lost her balance, because she missed the next step of the stairs and started to fall down the remainder. Instinctively, I shot forward, my arms stretching out. I managed to catch her mere instants before she hit the ground as I noticed she was bracing herself for impact. Did she have a habit of falling down? She looked up and her eyes locked on mine, making me forget temporarily that I was way too sweaty to have her this close. She just felt so good, cradled in my arms like that! I also got a funny sense of déjà vu as the thought entered my mind that I had helped her out of a compromising situation not even a week ago. I fought back a smile at that.

'You okay?', I managed to ask her, 'That's the second time this week that I'm picking you off the floor', I continued, no longer able to contain my humourous train of thought.

Her cheeks turned a lovely shade of deep pink, making me want to trace my hands along them. Of course, that would mean releasing my hold on her, causing her to fall down again. I was supporting all of her weight, her feet hovering above the ground.

Alice interrupted our private little bubble.

'I think she's able to stand by herself now.'

I knew I had to put her down, and soon, to avoid awkwardness, but I couldn't bring myself to do so right away. Instead, I kept my arms around her for just a few moments longer and then gently placed her back on her feet. She was still so close, and even though she was blushing, her eyes were locked on mine, never looking away.

_This is the perfect moment to let her know!_

I wasn't entirely sure about that. For one, I was sweaty.

_Like you care..._

Usually I didn't, but I didn't want to ask Bella out on a date looking – and smelling – like this.

Second, Alice was hovering nearby, obviously concerned for Bella and annoyed by my intrusion of their girl-time.

Before I could make up my mind whether or not to say something, Alice pulled Bella out the door behind her.

I shrugged to myself and continued my way upstairs. Even though we barely had a conversation, running into her just now only added to my high. Not only had I made up my mind and gotten a good workout, I had also got to hold her, albeit briefly, and the look in her eyes when I was holding her made me think I might stand a chance.

Then my mind wandered back to the vision of her walking down the stairs in her school uniform. It was so simple, but looked so amazing on her. Bella didn't need much embellishment and from what I had seen of her so far, she didn't care much for it either. She was like a breath of fresh air amidst the Barbie-doll fashion victims I was surrounded with. I liked the longsleeved shirt and the t-shirt she was wearing today, it made her look very relaxed and comfortable, while still showing off her small frame and hugging every curve of her body. And then the skirt... or almost lack thereof... My mind started to wander to less virtuous places and I quickly decided that a shower was definitely what I needed. A cold one. I didn't want the image of Bella tainted like that.

_Yet._

Uhm... yeah, I guess so. But I didn't want her to be just something I get turned on by and nothing more. I wanted to _know_ her and want her for everything that she is, not just her body. So I wasn't going to envision her like that yet. Or at least try to.

When I finished my shower and was getting something to eat, Alice walked in. She probably had given Bella a ride home.

'What's up with you?', she asked, glaring at me.

'Just making a snack. Didn't know I needed your permission for that', I replied.

She sighed, 'That's not what I meant, obviously. What's it with you lusting after Bella?'

I barely managed to swallow the bite I had just taken. Did she actually accuse me of _lusting_ after Bella?

_Well, you were..._

That was beside the point. I'd told Alice everything that had happened, which was a first for us. Neither of us had felt comfortable discussing my lovelife before. That was probably due to the fact that it wasn't so much love as it had been sex. So me confiding in my little sister about actual feelings I had, them being about her friend even adding to it, was a big step forward for us. Given the information she had, she shouldn't be so quick to judge me. Oh, wait... I never had a chance to tell her about my decision. She only knew Emmett had forbidden me to go near Bella. She didn't know I was determined to ignore that.

She was still glaring at me.

'Ali, relax, I meant to talk to you about that, I just haven't had the chance yet.'

She crossed her arms and raised an eyebrow, challenging me to explain myself.

'I'm listening.'

'I like Bella.'

'Can you tell me something I don't know yet?'

'I like her enough to ignore Emmett.'

Her eyes widened.

'I did a lot of thinking since I talked to him. So much that I have absolutely no idea what we discussed today in class. All I could think about was Bella and how being around her might affect my friendship with Emmett, and yours with her for that matter. But I can't just ignore her, only because _he_ told me to. And I know I don't know what she thinks about all this, but I figured, if I don't try, I'll never know. And I really, really _like_ her, you know? Like, just thinking about her makes me forget what I'm doing at the time. It's as if my mind can only come up with _Bella Bella Bella_ anymore.'

Wow, saying it out loud made it even more intense than when it was just in my head.

Alice's eyes softened while listening to my rant and finally she walked up to me and hugged me. Another novelty in our relationship. It's not like we weren't close, but we weren't particularly physical, except when we were teasing each other. Could this be another effect of having Bella around? A newfound closeness to my sister?

'Thanks, I guess? Anyway, I haven't thought of her that way. Well, tried not to, at least. I want her to mean more to me than that.'

'Eddie, I think she already does. Have you heard yourself talk about her?'

'It's just, I don't know how to handle this. I'm only used to the easy way, no strings attached. I've been acting like that for so long, this is all new to me. _And_ I don't even know if she likes me too', I sighed.

Alice pulled back and gave me a knowing smile.

'She does!', she cheered, 'I know she does! But I'm not sure she knows it yet.'

'You've lost me, Pix. What do you mean, she doesn't know it yet?'

She playfully smacked my shoulder.

'I mean, it's obvious she likes you. She's way too nervous when she's here, avoids talking about you, because everytime she does she can't stop blushing, and whenever something even remotely linked to you is brought up, she gets unbelievably clumsy. She broke four of those hideous glasses aunt Cynthia gave us. And of course you noticed her graceful stumble down the stairs earlier. That was a direct result of you speaking to her, in case you didn't notice. She told me she's naturally clumsy, but you seem to bring it out even more. Stop grinning like the idiot you are!', she laughed.

'So, what do you propose I do?', I asked.

'Well, you could start by looking – and smelling – nice. Not the sweaty thing you were sporting earlier.'

'Sorry, Pix,' I said sarcastically, 'I'd been working out. But I'll keep that in mind', I added hurriedly, as she was giving me her menacing glare.

'Then, and this is important, _act_ nice too. Don't use your usual array of tricks and looks. Just try to get her alone and _talk_ to her. She's staying over this weekend, so you're bound to find an uninterrupted moment then.'

So Thursday I paid a little more attention to what I was wearing, in case I ran into her again. No such luck. I spotted her in the kitchen, but when I walked in, she mumbled an excuse and disappeared to Alice's room.

I had checked her Facebook some more and found a few pictures of Bella in a uniform similar to one I had seen Emmett wear in his old London pictures. I clicked _Like_ on a couple of pictures in an innocent attempt at flirting and also sent her another text, but she didn't respond. I started to wonder if she was just shy, or worried about Emmett, or not interested after all, or something else entirely. Alice didn't know what to make of it either, because Bella seemed to carefully avoid the subject. At least I knew she'd be here this weekend and I was determined to get her alone at some point.

Friday she dropped off her bag before they both would go out with some other friends. They were in such a hurry, I only managed to shout a 'Have fun' after their retreating forms. Not having much else to do, I locked myself in my room and worked on a paper I had due next week. Might as well get it over with so I could make the best of the weekend.

Around eleven I heard a car pull up in the driveway and doors open and close. I expected them to go upstairs immediately, but when I didn't hear any noises down the hall, I got curious. I opened my door and heard some faint sounds coming from the living room. Pretending to crave a midnight snack, I made my way downstairs and walked through the living room to the kitchen, greeting the four girls I passed while feigning nonchalance. Two of them giggled, one started blushing, and one rolled her eyes at me. Maybe I was being a little too obvious. I shrugged and went into the kitchen to retrieve my alibi, all the while eavesdropping on the conversation going on in the living room.

'There's definitely a lot of tension', I heard Jessica whisper.

'Yeah, did you see the way he looked at you most and longest?', Angela added.

Did I really do that? I wasn't aware of that.

I waited a couple more minutes before heading back to my room. Angela and Jessica were just leaving.

'No sleepover this weekend?', I asked.

'Just B tonight', Alice answered.

'Right. Well, goodnight, ladies.'

'Bye, Edward', and the two giggling girls left.

'What are they on?', I mumbled, mostly to myself.

'Uhm, Alice? I'm pretty beat, let's go upstairs, okay?'

'I'll be right there, B... Very subtle, Edward', Alice said when Bella had closed the door to her room.

I feigned innocence and help up the bag of Doritos I took from the kitchen in evidence.

'Alright, alright. It's not like I mind anyway. Look, I think she's mostly just a little shy. So I'll give you some alone time tomorrow, use it wisely, okay?'

And with that, she climbed the stairs and joined Bella in her room.

The next morning, I woke up to the smell of freshly baked waffles. They must've already been up. Anxious to finally get to talk to Bella, I jumped out of bed and made my way downstairs. When I walked in, Bella's eyes widened alarmingly, and I thought she might have actually looked me up and down briefly, before quickly averting her gaze. It was then that I realized I had jumped out of bed and gone downstairs without putting anything on, so I was standing there in my boxershorts. Talk about awkward.

_Well, not much you can do about it now, so you might as well go on. And it's not like you don't want her to see you like this soon anyway._

True, but I don't want her to be uncomfortable either.

'Morning, ladies.'

'H-h-hi', she stammered.

Definitely flustered.

Maybe now was not the right time. Maybe I should put some more clothes on before talking to Bella. And let her get dressed too. She was only wearing a skimpy satin nightgown I'm sure Alice helped pick out. The midnight blue fabric enhanced her natural beauty, her creamy skin and her thick hair that looked almost auburn in the morning sun.

Just when I decided I'd just grab something quick to eat and talk to Bella later today, Alice made up my mind for me.

'B, I'm gonna hit the shower, okay? See you in a bit', she said, while cocking her eyebrow at me, letting me know this was the _alone time_ she'd promised last night.

Well, it was now or never.

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**A/N: So, yeah, I enrolled them in University Prep and UW respectively (Edward, Jasper and Rosalie went to U-Prep too when they were in high school). I figured I needed a setting and these seemed appropriate. So this also means that they live in Seattle. I didn't mention any location earlier, because it wasn't relevant at the time. Expect to have more details revealed this way - it's no fun giving it all away right at the start! I know U-Prep doesn't have a school uniform, but I've always found it fitting for a private school to have a uniform. Plus, it allows for some lemon-y thoughts coming up as I've already insinuated a bit in this chapter :p**


	16. Movie, ice cream, sleepover, breakfast

**Disclaimer: I don'****t own Twilight or the characters. They're all Stephenie Meyer's invention. I just love to incorporate them into the figments of my own imagination.**

**Common pairings. All human.**

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16. Movie, ice cream, sleepover, breakfast...

This weekend turned out unlike anything I'd expected. And it was only Saturday!

Friday night I had gone to see a movie with Alice, Jessica and Angela. It was a typical girls' night out: we endulged in popcorn and candies while watching the sequel to _Transformers_. Jessica was swooning exaggeratedly and repeatedly sighed that Shia LaBeouf and Megan Fox were 'so terribly romantic' as a couple. Personally, I didn't see it. The guy was this standard bundle of muscles who couldn't even tell the somewhat tacky girl he loved her, while trying to save the world from evil robots. It completely lacked depth. Just another don't-think-just-watch kind of movie. Of course Jessica wanted to know why I didn't partake in her worshiping, and of course my aforementioned reasons absolutely fell short.

'But don't you think Shia's positively dreamy?', she asked me, 'He's delicious!'

'No, not really. He's totally not my type.'

'Then what is your type?', Jessica questioned me.

'Yeah,' Angela chimed in, 'I'm curious about that too. Have you seen something to your liking at school yet?'

I shook my head.

'Really? But there are some really cute guys...'

'No, not at school...', I said, and I immediately wanted to take that back.

'Not at school?!', they both shrieked, 'So there _is_ someone? Tell us!'

And the questions kept getting fired at me. If I still had a boyfriend in London. No. Did I meet someone somewhere else? Blush. Who, what, where, when? … And how did I know him, how long had I known him, what did he look like, had we kissed yet...? I looked over to Alice helplessly – we had made it into an ice cream parlor and she was the only one of us that had managed to eat her sundae. Things started to fall into place, because they started asking her questions as well.

'_What?_ You know? Tell us, what's he like, who is it?!'

How much _did _Alice know?

'We haven't really talked about it that much, but as far as I know, there isn't really a lot to know', she said diplomatically.

Fuck, my stumbling, blabbering and blushing hadn't gone by as unnoticed as I'd thought. Did that mean _he_ knew too? My blush managed to get even deeper; I focused all my attention to my sundae, hoping they wouldn't see. It was quiet. Good, hopefully now we could talk about something else.

Relieved, I sighed and decided to ask Angela what she thought of the movie. Hopefully I'd trigger another lengthy debate of Shia's physical qualities.

I hadn't even opened my mouth when I saw Jessica and Angela staring at me. The blush that had just started to fade came back full force and I could almost hear the click in their heads as they pieced everything together. I could only hope their reaction wouldn't be too bad and they would drop the subject soon.

Of course, that was going to happen.

'You're kidding me!', Angela said, '_Edward_?!'

'Honey, we've all drooled over him, believe me. Nothing wrong with that. I mean, come on, he's delicious! Sorry, Ali, you know it's true', Jessica added.

Alice looked at me.

'Well, B, I have to admit it. Most girl who meet my brother show some interest, until they realize it's a waste of time.'

What did she mean by that?

'Waste of time?'

'Edward is... fickle,' Alice explained, 'He doesn't date. He hooks up. He flirts. He plays. He's my brother and I love him, but seriously, girl, be careful.'

Uhm...

'He _is_ yummy...', Angela interjected, 'That body!'

Jessica and Angela started describing in detail all the physical aspects of Edward that added up to his _yummy-ness._ Icouldn't listen to it for very long. With every new remark my blush only deepened, which made me realise I _was_ actually _drooling_ over him. But they forgot his more important qualities – chivalrous, mysterious, protective... or didn't they know about those? Did they only go surface-deep – in itself justified, as he _was_ gorgeous – and didn't notice everything else? It sure looked like it.

Why was I such an open book? Why hadn't I just denied it? Now there was no controlling it anymore. I'd have to do something about my obsession. The girls wouldn't let me forget. Would they insist I act upon it or would they try to distract me?

The original plan was that Alice and I would be dropped off at her place. But after my involuntary confession Jessica decided we'd have some tea before she and Angela went home. They wanted to see how I reacted to Edward's presence. And vice versa. Well, they were up for a disappointment. I was convinced Edward only saw me as one of his sister's friends. Yes, we'd kissed at the party last week, but based on the stories I'd heard since then, that was a regular thing for him. I shouldn't read too much into it.

Edward must have known how he affected girls, and I suspected by now that not all of them were as subtle as I'd hoped to be. He must have known girls were _drooling_ over him. So when he heard us talking in the living room, he just 'happened' to walk in.

'Ladies.'

Giggle. Blush.

'How was the movie?'

More giggling. More blushing.

He shrugged and left. As soon as he was out of sight, the girls analyzed every movement he'd made and look he'd given us. Conclusion: there was definitely a lot of tension between us. Really? And note sarcasm.

When he returned a few minutes later, Angela and Jessica were about to leave.

'No sleepover this weekend?', he asked.

'Just B tonight', Alice answered.

'Right. Well, goodnight, ladies.'

'Bye, Edward', they both giggled.

'What are they on?', he asked after they'd left.

I didn't know where to look.

'Uhm, Alice? I'm pretty beat, let's go upstairs, okay?'

The next morning Alice and I were in the kitchen having breakfast and discussing our plans for the day, when Edward walked in. There I was, in my pyjamas. Luckily I had let Alice convince me to get a short satin dress for my sleepovers instead of the sweatpants and t-shirt I slept in at home. But still I looked no more than ordinary.

But he... every time I was here he looked like he'd just gotten home from a photoshoot. Wednesday he'd sported gray sweatpants and a college t-shirt; Thursday he was wearing the most perfectly fitted jeans and a charcoal designer button-down shirt. His messy bronze hair and the perfect amount of scruff covering his jaw and chin only added a delicious degree of nonchalance. It made me even more aware that he was painfully out of my league. That one kiss, last week, was just a kiss. One of many, probably, for him.

And right now... he was in his boxershorts! Light blue, Calvin Klein. Was he doing this on purpose?! I couldn't help it, I _had_ to look. His amazing body, his muscular arms, his broad chest, his toned abs… Drool. With a little effort I managed to avert my gaze. I didn't want to get caught ogling him. _Or the bulge in those boxers._ Yes, that too.

'Morning, ladies.'

Gulp.

'H-h-hi', I stammered.

Oh help, my clumsiness was getting even worse. What would he think of me like this?

'B, I'm gonna hit the shower, okay? See you in a bit', Alice said.

I shot up, a little frightened. Was she leaving me alone with Edward? In his _boxers_? Help!

She smiled at me and exchanged a look with Edward. What was she telling him? I would grill her about it later.

Well, just because he's delicious, didn't give him the right to keep me from having breakfast. I got up to get myself another cup of tea.

'Hey, Bella', I heard a voice behind me.

So close.

Too close.

I glanced over my shoulder and sure enough, he was standing right behind me. I flushed bright red and managed to humm my recognition before getting back to the task at hand.

'I'm a little curious...'

What could _he_ be curious about?

'Why are you always so rude to me?'

I was baffled. Me, rude? To him?

Nervous, yes. At a loss for words, yes. Blushing, clumsy, stammering... okay, I admit, obsessed, yes. All of the above. But rude? I didn't think so.

'You never talk to me, you hardly look at me, don't respond to my messages anymore, you make up excuses so you don't have to be in the same room as I am... What did I do wrong?'

He thought he'd wronged me? And so what if he did? Why did _he_ care?

'I'm not being rude,' I whispered, 'I just don't know what to say...'

_Because it's all nonsense to you anyway. You don't want some inexperienced geek like me._

'That's too bad, 'cause I'd like to talk to you.'

_Why?_

'I'd like to get to know you better', he said, and I noticed he'd lowered his voice.

I turned around, wanting to see his face. Was he playing some sort of game with me? But his face showed nothing but sincere interest. I found myself staring at him. It took me a couple of seconds before I managed to close my mouth, as my jaw had dropped at the sight. Then several more to formulate a full sentence.

'What do you want to know?'

'Oh, so much', he said, ever so careless, 'but for starters just two little things. First: do you have a boyfriend?'

Blush.

That was my response.

How lame can you get? Why couldn't I be relaxed, like Edward?

_Because you're standing here in __a skimpy nightgown talking to the object of your obsession! That's why._

Then I would at least try to appear relaxed.

'No, but you could've known that.'

He looked at me, slightly puzzled.

'I hang out here all the time... You're on my Facebook... And your best friend's my brother.'

'That's true, but I wanted to hear it from you. First hand.'

I just nodded. There was logic in his words. My blush couldn't possibly deepen any further.

'Second: do you like me?'

Why did I choose that exact moment to take a sip from my tea? I was so shocked by his question, I squirted it all over him. Was I that obvious? Or had Angela and Jessica's behavior given me away? Did Alice or Emmett say something?

'Does that mean _no_? 'Cause you could've just told me, you know. Now I have to shower...'

A vision of Edward in the shower caused me to blush again.

'No, no,' I hurried to interject, 'you just caught me off guard, is all... Because uhm, well... you're sort of... right... I guess', I confessed while biting my lip.

I couldn't bring myself to look at him.

Which is why I didn't see him closing the little distance between us. Suddenly I felt his hands cradling my head and his lips pressed to mine. It felt exactly like last week. Just without the alcohol. Even better!

Before I could recover from the shock and start enjoying the kiss, Edward broke away. I slowly opened my eyes and found myself drowning in his emerald eyes. I knew they were green, but they had an amazing sparkle in them now...

He kissed me again, more careful this time. One hand kept cradling my head, while he wrapped the other around my waist, pulling me closer.

Wow. This kiss was... even better, if possible! Of course I didn't really have a frame of reference, I'd only made out with Jacob on a few drunken occasions, but I couldn't imagine anything that could top this. My heart was beating like crazy and my skin tingled where he touched me. I heard his breathing become more shallow and laboured, felt goosebumps arise where I touched him and his kisses grew more eager. For a while I didn't care we were in the kitchen, that I looked a mess and that I was supposed to be hanging out with my friend Alice. Edward wanted me! He was kissing me and he didn't care either, who my brother was, who his sister was... he wanted me!

Suddenly I was very aware of the fact that, even though it didn't matter that we were in the kitchen, we were barely dressed. He was in his underwear and I wasn't wearing much more! I felt my blush return and pulled back. My body objected, but I knew I had to take a step back for now. Edward chuckled and gave me a playful look.

'What, not good?', he teased.

I shook my head and waited until I felt sure I wouldn't stumble over my words.

'No, very...'

That sexy crooked grin made another appearance, lightening his entire face, making his eyes sparkle even more.

'But I really need to go sho... get dressed', I corrected myself.

Something in his eyes told me he was envisioning now what I'd previously been imagining him doing.

'Wat are you doing tonight?', he asked.

Uhm... I knew there was something, but it slipped my mind. I was still thinking about that kiss. His lips. His hands... Oh right, there was something tonight. A party. Here.

'Then I guess I'll see you later', he said as he winked at me.

I hurried to Alice's room, carefully avoiding Edward's gaze. I was pretty sure the physical effect he had on me was also affecting him, and probably in a more visible way...

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**A/N: I'm not sure if I'll be able to update this week. We have a national holiday coming up over here (Queensday) which also happens to be my birthday, so I'll be quite busy. I will however try to update soon. Let me know what you think of the story so far - reviews are highly appreciated!**


	17. Halloween

**A/N: Sorry it took me so long to update. As I said after my previous update, I've had quite a busy week: normal working days, national holiday, birthday, and then I got to work extra because of a championship, which also meant I got to spend some quality time with my BFF :D To make up for the long wait, this chapter is a little longer. I hope you guys like it.**

**Disclaimer: I don'****t own Twilight or the characters. They're all Stephenie Meyer's invention. I just love to incorporate them into the figments of my own imagination.**

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17. Halloween

Still blushing vehemently I stumbled into Alice's room. I best shower first, that always managed to calm me down. While gathering my toiletries, Alice emerged from her bathroom.

'And?', she asked.

'Like you don't know', I muttered.

She batted her eyes, feigning innocence.

'I saw the look you gave him earlier', I accused.

She raised her hands apologetically.

'I only let him know I was giving you guys some privacy, so he could finally act on his pining for you.'

_His _pining for _me_?

'You've been gravitating towards each other since I met you. Last night was just too obvious. And you apparently are too shy to act on it. So I suggested he take the first step. So... what happened?'

I guess it wasn't only obvious that _I_ was obsessed with Edward, but _he_ had been acting suspicious too. I couldn't help but grin.

'What? Tell me!'

'Well, he asked me why I always ignore him… and then he kissed me.'

Alice was practically hopping up and down. Her enthusiasm over even the littlest of things was infectuous.

'I want to know everything! Oh and we need to make a quick action plan. But hurry, shower first. We have _so_ much to do today!'

I didn't ask what this plan of hers entailed. Something told me I'd best lay low. Her infectuous enthusiasm... fine, but I didn't want to rush things.

The rest of the day was spent preparing for the party. Furniture had to be moved, cups put on tables, playlists sorted and more of the sort. I convinced Alice we should squeeze in some homework too, even if only during lunch. She caved, but demanded I let her style me for the party. That effectively diminished our study time, because Alice insisted on giving me a facial mask and a manicure as well. When I was about to rinse off the mask, Jessica and Angela arrived, officially starting our prepping time.

I had asked Alice not to say anything about Edward and me. This morning had been so unexpected, I wasn't sure what to make of it yet. But of course, Jessica's curiosity was unrelentless.

'So, I'm dying to hear... Did anything happen last night after we left?'

I was glad she specified. There was a difference between omitting something and lying about it and I didn't feel particularly comfortable with the latter. Since nothing _had_ happened the night before, I could deny truthfully and get back to the task at hand: dolling up for the party.

We were dressing up as fairies, all in the same, barely-there, strapless, sequined dresses with matching butterfly wings and knee-high stiletto boots. Luckily my clumsiness didn't affect my ability to walk in heels. All the time. I hoped I wouldn't trip during the party.

Angela's outfit was limegreen, which brought out the honey tint in her hair and her olive complexion. Jessica was wearing electric blue. On the hanger it was really loud, but it suited her. The deep purple she had chosen looked amazing on Alice. As for me, I had let Alice talk me into a hot pink version of the outfit. I usually didn't wear colors that bright, but Alice practically forced me to at least try it on. And I had to admit, the bright color offered a striking contrast to my pale skin and brown hair. Who would've thought? So when we had bought everything for my costume last Wednesday, I had also bought some more casual clothes, including a pink hoodie.

Alice had also explained to me that the rules regarding the school uniform weren't as strict as I was used to in London; only the skirt was compulsory, but we could wear it pretty much as short as we liked, within the boundaries of decency. We could wear our own shirt instead of the button-down provided, so long as it was white, blue, or both. That suited me just fine. I might be kind of skinny, but I knew I had nice legs, so I liked my hemlines short.

'Okay, now that you are pampered and primed, it's time to get started', Alice announced while pushing a small chest on wheels out of her bathroom.

Angela and Jessica giggled at my alarmed expression. Get started? What had we been doing for the last hour and a half? Alice rolled her eyes at me.

'These are just basic beautifying neccessities, Bella. Make up and utensils, hair equipment, accessoiries and miscellaneous', she said while pointing from the top to the bottom drawer.

The chest appeared scarier with every passing second.

The other girls had emptied their overnight bags onto the bed and their hair and make up equipment was spilling over two endtables. They were already busy applying their make up and fixing their hair in front of Alice's mirror, that covered nearly half of one of her walls.

'Ali, maybe you should start slow,' Angela suggested while giving me a reassuring smile in the mirror, 'Bella, what is your usual beauty routine?'

I didn't really have one. Usually I just showered and let my hair dry naturally – I hardly ever blowdried it – then wore it either down, in a ponytail or a messy bun. I used a generic cleanser for sensitive skin. Alice was dedicated to Clinique and had used five different bottles to clean and moisturize my face. I had to admit, it felt really nice, soft and smooth. Maybe I could look into that. As far as make up was concerned, I usually just applied some mascara and lipbalm. Sometimes, like for a party, I would wear a little lipgloss. Alice's array of products reminded me of Rosalie's bathroom – Emmett just happened to have obtained a shelf for his products. Adding that to their shared love for clothes and shopping, I could tell why they got along. Alice shaked her head incredulously at my routine, but figured it would probably be better not to go all out.

'We'll just enhance your natural beauty.'

She instructed me to go wet my hair and then to sit back and relax. I doubted it would be as relaxing as she claimed it to be, but did as I was told. She combed through my hair before putting styling foam in it, pulling out the blowdryer and instructing me to lean forward and tilt my head down while she dried it.

'Drying it like this will add volume, not that you really need it, but it's still a nice effect, and it enhances your natural curl,' she explained, adding in a whisper, 'Edward won't be able to keep is eyes off you when I'm done.'

I flushed bright red, but luckily I was still upside down, so it could also be explained as blood rushing to my head. So this was all part of her action plan. When my hair was nearly dry, she combed through it using her fingers, smoothing it out a little, and put in in a loose bun high on my head. Then she started work on my face.

'I promise I won't put too much on. You'll be totally comfortable. I'll just emphasize bits and pieces.'

When Alice was finished with my make up I was handed a mirror. She had been right; I didn't look like I had tons of make up on. In fact, she had only drawn a black eyeliner, softened it with some eyeshadow and applied mascara. My lashes appeared much thicker and longer, though, than when I did it myself. I wonder what kind of mascara she'd used. While I was admiring myself, Alice quickly did her own make up – big purple smokey eyes that made her blue eyes stand out even more – and put almost an entire can of glitter spray in her usual spikey do. Jessica's make up also was quite extravagant and she had put in a wide head band that matched her dress, while Angela had kept her make up more toned down, like mine, and was wearing her hair in low pigtails. Then, Alice pulled out a box of face paint and added some sparkly stars, matching our outfits, on one of our temples.

'Okay, for the final touch... pull out the rubber band and fluff your hair a bit. Excellent', she beamed and proceeded to mist me with hairspray.

Lastly, she gave me a lipgloss that had a slight pink shade to it.

The entire afternoon, the girls had been taking pictures of our grooming and I found myself enjoying it more and more. Girl time like this wasn't half bad, so long as I could stay in my comfort zone somewhat. Back in London, Leah and Kim had invited me to a couple of girl nights, but they enjoyed playing _Barbie doll_ with me a little too much. They were my friends, but I really didn't like that, so after a while they learned not to include me in their girl nights unless I asked them too. In reality, I prefered hanging out with Jacob, Jared and Paul. Alice was a graceful hostess, seeming to know how to cater to each of our personalities, creating a pleasant atmosphere. Then, right before we went downstairs, Angela did the sweetest thing. She reached into her bag, pulled out a rectangular box and handed it to me.

'Just a little something from the three of us to welcome you here and as our friend.'

I was frozen in surprise for a few moments.

'Go ahead, open it', a bouncing Alice said.

Tearing off the gift wrap, I saw it was a, rather large, bottle of my favorite perfume, Bruno Banani eau de toilette.

'Alice noticed you were almost out,' Jessica said, 'So me and Ang went to get you a new one.'

This was incredible! I had only known these girls less than a week, but they had already welcomed me in their group and went out of their way to show me.

'You guys... thank you!', I managed to choke out as I felt myself tear up.

I found myself in a tight group hug that lasted until Dr. Cullen... Carlisle called from downstairs, letting us know Rosalie's mother had arrived and had brought some food for us. Alice danced lightly from the room, followed by the rest of us. I tried to find my balance in the killer heels she had put me in, thankful they were boots and not sandals, so they at least offered some support, and kept my eyes downcast to see where I put my feet. I didn't need to fall down the stairs twice in one week.

Walking into the kitchen, we were greeted by Carlisle and a woman I took to be Rosalie's mother. She must have been in her mid- to late-forties, seeing as she had 21-year-old twins, but she looked more like late-thirties. She was wearing black slacks and a deep burgundy satin blouse. Her hair was pulled back into a Grace Kelly roll and had this mesmerizing shade of blonde or lightbrown, almost like caramel. She wasbeautiful and most definite Rosalie's mother.

'Hi girls,' she said, 'Don't you look absolutely adorable!', then walking over to me and extending her hand, 'You must be Bella. I'm Esme, Rosalie and Jasper's mother. I'm so glad to finally meet you. Emmett and Rosalie have told me so much about you, I feel like we're already family.'

She was so friendly! I'd met friends' parents before, and they were always polite and friendly, but nothing compared to how Esme and Carlisle treated me. Carlisle welcomed me into his home and Esme didn't treat me like the stranger I was to her, but like family. Well, I was her future son-in-law's sister, but still... Her warm, brown eyes appraised me as she awaited my response. I took her hand and she squeezed mine gently.

'Thank you, it's nice to meet you too. Alice told me you decorated this house. It's so beautiful.'

'Thank you, dear, that means a lot. Girls, I've brought some food for you,' she continued, gesturing towards the kitchen table, 'I don't want you to get hungry during the party and binge on chips and pizza.'

She started handing out plates, forks and napkins, just when Rosalie walked in.

'Mom! I thought I saw your car parked out front. You brought your pasta salad, great!'

'Hi sweetheart. Oh, cute costume! It's a little short, though. Will you be alright?'

Rosalie rolled her eyes and lifted up the skirt of her army green, painted on, military dress.

'I'm wearing shorts.'

More like hotpants. But they seemed to please Esme. Rosalie's legs were covered in fishnet stockings and she was balancing on black stiletto pumps, which, I learned later, were Louboutins. She had victory rolls in her long blonde hair and had the rest tied back in a forties style bun, to accommodate the cap that went with the outfit. She reminded me of a pin up girl, or Christina Aguilera in _Candy Man_.

'Where are the boys?', Esme asked.

'They're helping Emmett bring in the keg. Don't worry, mom, we have wristbands for people who can drink, so no one underaged or driving will, and one of us is gonna be near the keg all the time. We had to clear it with Carlisle first.'

I _had_ been wondering about that, because I could imagine college students' reluctance to hang out at a party with us high school kids and not being able to have a drink. As well thought through as it all sounded, I could still think of a few loopholes, though, but then again, someone would always try to find one, and this way no one could claim no precautions were taken. Then the first part of Rosalie's answer registered.

'Help Emmett? But he's all muscles... he could carry the keg himself _and_ the other guys.'

'Well, you know guys,' Rosalie shrugged, 'they want to keep an eye on their precious beer.'

We all started laughing, until we heard a few loud thumps come from the hallway and voices discussing the best way to get the keg in.

'Jazz, let go, I've got this!', Emmett said, through clenched teeth by the sound of it.

'No man, let me help you, you can't see where you're going like this', I heard an unfamiliar voice counter him.

'That's because you're blocking my view with your _help_!'

I could imagine them struggling over carrying a keg. Why anyone would want to get in my brother's way was beyond me. Rosalie decided to intervene.

'Eddie, get my brother out of there and let Em do it himself, before anyone gets hurt. We need the keg in here in one piece!'

A few moments later, Edward came in, dragging a tall, skinny boy with unruly blonde curls with him. This must be Jasper. From the corner of my eye I saw Alice quickly checking her reflection in the glass door and fidgeting nervously, although she tried to cover this up by pretending to be mesmerized by her plate of food. However, I couldn't really linger on that observation, because Edward... looked absolutely delectable. He was wearing camouflage cargo pants, army boots and a white wifebeater that showed off his well-toned torso. The other boy was wearing the same outfit, and Alice and I both swallowed noisily. I got the impression she found this Jasper every bit as... attractive, to say the least, as I found Edward. Obviously, he and Rosalie were twins, so it would have been kind of unfair if only one of them was goodlooking, but Jasper was really quite handsome, if you liked the surfertype kind of guy.

'Geez Eddie, you don't have to pull out my arm!', he complained, then saw his mother's food, 'Great! I'm starving!', and went to dig in.

Esme swatted his hands away.

'Haven't I taught you any manners? Say hi to Carlisle and the girls first and introduce yourself to Bella', she chided him.

Embarrassed, he grumbled a greeting, causing Jessica and Angela to giggle – did they know how Alice seemed to feel about him? – and Alice to blush. He then looked at me and waved.

'I'm Jasper, but you can call me Jazz if you want. So, you're big E's lil' sis?', he said in a slight southern accent.

I knew their father lived in Texas and originated there, but I'd never heard Rosalie speak with an accent. It suited him, though.

'Hi Jazz,' I replied, 'it's nice to finally meet Rose's elusive twin.'

He smiled and winked in response.

'Pleasure's all mine, darlin'.'

There was something in that smile, and especially in that wink, that told me he knew more. Then again, Rosalie did say Edward _and_ her brother had come over for dinner Tuesday, so he probably knew as much as she and Emmett did.

In the meantime Emmett, dressed similar to Edward and Jasper, had carried in the keg, put it in its designated spot and went for the food as well, barely taking his time to nod his greeting to us. It was a good thing us girls had already gotten our share, as the guys quickly emptied the containers. Boys and their food...

'Alright, listen up for a minute,' Carlisle started, 'I know you're all responsible kids and we've discussed this before, but I just want to remind you to pay attention to the wristbands I've provided. I don't want any drunk teenagers or accidents on my watch. I trust you to make sure your friends don't pull any crazy stunts. Esme and I will leave you to it, but in case you need us, we'll be close by. So just have fun and you know where to find us.'

We'd just loaded all the plates and forks into the dishwasher when the bell rang, announcing the arrival of the first guests. No one I knew, probably. Carlisle and Esme went to answer the door and then excused themselves.

'How many people are invited?', I asked Angela.

'Mostly friends of any of us, which comes down to most of our junior class, a few seniors and about half the junior class of U-Dub.'

Right, no one I knew. Pretty soon, the only other two faces I knew came in; Mike and Ben, dressed as gangsters in grey dress pants, tight white t-shirts, black vests and hats. Even though Jessica tried to act cool – apparently they were on another one of their breaks – she couldn't hide the fact that she looked Mike up and down before turning on her heel and heading towards the other side of the room, with Mike following her. Ben walked up to Angela and whispered something in her ear, causing her to blush. He didn't stray far from her the entire party. They were cute together.

Alice had been standing at the door, greeting people and handing out wristbands to those eligible. I noticed she'd almost ran out, which could only mean most of the people invited had arrived. I decided to help her with the last ones, two girls who were dressed similar to Rosalie. One was short, blonde and almost angelic looking, the other was slightly taller and had long, wavy, darkbrown hair.

'Jane, Bree!', Rosalie squealed and threw herself at them in a hug.

So that wrapped up the guestlist; Alice and I left our positions at the door.

'So... Jasper?', I asked tentatively.

She jumped.

'How'd you know?'

'I didn't. But I noticed the way you acted when he walked in.'

She blushed, 'Do you think anyone else noticed?'

I shook my head.

'He's cute.'

She grinned, 'I know, right? But... I don't know... it's kind of weird.'

'Weird?'

'Our parents are practically engaged... He's one of my brother's best friends...'

'Uhm, Ali? That didn't exactly stop Edward, you know?'

'Yeah, but it's also, I've known him and Rose my whole life. And he's so quiet, and I'm, well, me. I don't even know what he thinks.'

'I don't think it's that big of a problem. Just see what happens.'

'He _is_ a good kisser... We accidentally kissed at my Sweet Sixteen', she added after my curious look.

Cue goofy grin. This girl was totally crushing on Jasper!

'Well, that ought to tell you he at least likes you.'

At that moment, Edward walked past us. He didn't stop, but slightly slowed down his pace and let his fingertips graze my arm. A jolt of electricity coursed through me at his touch and my breath caught. This hadn't happened before... but I liked it. I wondered if he felt it too. Then I felt his breath tickle my neck as he whispered 'Amazing' in my ear and continued on his way. I followed him with my gaze, a little stunned.

'Bella?', Alice's voice filtered through, 'Hello? B, you're zoning out on me... are you okay? I'm gonna get us some drinks.'

Didn't she notice what happened? I guess not. Maybe Edward had been more subtle that I thought.

When Alice returned with our drinks I was talking with Jasper about nothing in particular. He was a quiet guy who didn't speak in long sentences, but I was already starting to take a liking to him.

'I like your costumes. Ali looks like a real pixie now', Jasper said as Alice was just walking up behind him.

I had expected her to at least pull a face at the reference to the nickname that suited her well but she hated nontheless. She didn't. Instead she blushed and the corners of her mouth pulled up. Maybe Jasper was the only one allowed to call her _Pixie_.

'Anyways, between Em and Rose and Eddie, I heard so much about you, I'm glad to have finally met you.'

Emmett and Rosalie telling Jasper about me, that I got. They had told Esme about me too. But Edward... I only knew what Rosalie told me he'd said, and that wasn't much to go on.

'Edward talked about me?'

Jasper seemed to realize he'd let something slip. Alice stepped in to hand me my drink.

'Knowing my brother, he told you the same things he told me, if not more', she said conspiratorily.

Now I was starting to get curious. What had they been talking about?

But I also noticed that Alice had no problem talking to Jasper now. That had probably something to do with the fact that neither of them was the subject of the conversation. Realizing I still hadn't _thanked_ her for this morning, I excused myself.

'Go for it!', I mouthed to her before turning around.

I wasn't really going anywhere, just wanting to give them some privacy, as far as that was possible at a party. Hopefully Alice would take the opportunity to work her bubbly personality to her own advantage for a change, instead of everyone else's.

I decided that tonight was as good an occasion as any to get better acquainted with some of the people I went to school with, and started to make a round through the ground floor. I spotted Angela and Ben cuddled together on the couch in the living room, and Mike and Jessica making up after their break in the kitchen. When I turned, I saw the guy that knocked me over last week, taking up position by the keg. Quickly, I made my escape, not wanting to risk running into him again. Walking back into the living room, I recognized a boy standing near the fireplace from one of my classes. He was alone and looked kind of lost. He noticed me walking up to him and started to both smile and shift nervously. Had he missed the fact that it was Halloween? He didn't look that much different from what I'd seen of him at school: greasy hair, bad case of acne, thick glasses. He had changed his uniform for a plaid Gap-shirt and jeans, but the whole was standard nerd attire. When I got closer, however, I noticed the Superman-logo, barely visibly through the opened buttons at the top.

'Clark Kent?', I asked, pointing at the logo.

His face lit up.

'Wow, you're the first one to notice! The rest keeps asking me why I'm not wearing a costume.'

'Well, yeah, it's subtle. You're Eric, right? I think we have Maths together?'

'Yeah, Eric Yorkie. You're Bella Swan? How do you like Seattle and U-Prep so far?'

He loosened up rather quickly and we chatted for a while.

Out of the corner of my eye I saw the keg-guy had noticed me and was making his way over. Or maybe he was just coming in this general direction. Either way, I didn't want to risk it. Before I could excuse myself to Eric and find a place to hide, I felt that jolt of electricity again as Edward lightly touched his hand to my bare shoulder and whispered 'Follow me'.

'Uhm... Eric, sorry, I've got to go for a minute. See you later, okay?'

'Sure thing, Bella,' he smiled, 'Nice meeting you.'

I waved at him and followed Edward down the hall, to a part of the ground floor I hadn't been before. He opened a door at the end of the hallway, turned back to check if I was coming and walked in. I looked around to see if anyone was paying attention, but everyone was too engrossed in their own activities. I hurried the last couple of feet, as hurriedly as was possible in my shoes, and headed into the unfamiliar room.

I only had time to register that it was some sort of office – probably Carlisle's – before I heard the door close behind me and felt Edward's hands push me back until my back was against the door. The atmosphere was literally humming with both electricity and anticipation as Edward's hands traveled from my shoulders to my wrists and back while his body inched closer and closer, undtil he was pressed against me. I looked up into his eyes and had to remind myself to breathe, because there was something in them I didn't recognize. It reminded me somewhat of the way he had looked at me this morning, but more, very intense. Like a longing, or a hunger, his eyes burned. My heart started pounding almost deafeningly and I felt the blood rushing to my face. He leaned down, not that far this time since I was in four inch heels, my eyes fluttered closed and then his lips crushed mine. His left hand cupped my face, his thumb stroked my cheek, his right arm slipped around my waist, pulling me closer. I felt his tongue licking my bottom lip, asking for entrance, and I gladly opened my mouth to him, tasting him. My hands tangled in his hair, holding him in place, not letting him go. This felt so good, too good, I didn't want it to end. But eventually, I had to break free for air. I could feel him smile against my skin, then trailing kisses down my neck before coming back to my lips.

'Bella...', he sighed.

I felt a goofy grin spreading across my face. He pulled back.

'What?'

'I just like hearing you say my name', I confessed.

'Hmmm, Bella, Bella, Bella', he teased and slipped his tongue back between my lips, causing me to moan into his mouth.

'I've been waiting all day to do this,' Edward said as he lifted me up, 'I've wanted to kiss you all day.'

'Then why didn't you?', I breathed.

He walked us across the room and set me down on top of the desk.

'Alice kept you hostage and I didn't want to cross her. I came _this_ close, though. You don't know how it's tortured me! And then I saw you, dressed like this,' his eyes roamed my body appreciatively, 'I had to keep reminding myself that Emmett is here too tonight and I have to behave. But you're making it very, _very_ difficult...'

'Glad to know I'm not the only one', I said, getting a hold of the dogtags around his neck and pulling his lips back to mine, 'But shut up and kiss me again already.'


	18. Kiss and tell

**A/N: I'm sorry it took me so long to update. I've been very busy with work. Also, a lot is going on in this chapter and at times it was a little difficult to get inside Edward's head. I hope I did a good job and you guys like this chapter.**

**Disclaimer: I don'****t own Twilight or the characters. They're all Stephenie Meyer's invention. I just love to incorporate them into the figments of my own imagination.**

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18. Kiss and tell

This weekend turned out unlike anything I'd expected. Hoped for, but not expected.

Talking to Bella... a little awkward at first, but definitely worth it. She'd tried to act all cool, but I could tell she was as nervous as I was. I didn't want to use any of my standard lines with her, which pretty much left me no other choice than to be completely honest. Like I said before, nothing ventured, nothing gained. Then, when she admitted she liked me... I didn't care anymore that we were both barely dressed. I just had to kiss her. It felt exactly like last week. Just without the alcohol. But there was something new. The moment my lips touched hers, I felt a strange sort of electricity course through me. Startled, I broke away. Had she felt it too? I watched as she slowly opened her eyes and then I was drowning again, drowning in those big pools of chocolate. I kissed her again and this time pulled her closer to me, not leaving any room between our bodies. I could feel her heart beating, so fast. It got harder for me to breathe and her touch left a searing trail on my skin. This kiss was amazing! Suddenly, she pulled back and her blush had made a return.

I chuckled, 'What, not good?'

She shook her head, 'No, very... but I really need to go sho... get dressed.'

_Did she just almost say _shower_? Dude, that's hot!_

I know, don't remind me. Another image of Bella entered my mind, in the shower, water cascading off her body...

_I like where this is going..._

Shut up! I don't want to taint her image like that. She's more than that!

To take my mind off it I asked her what she was doing that night, completely forgetting that we were throwing a Halloween party and she was attending. After reminding me, she went upstairs to my sister, leaving me in the kitchen, trying to calm down. I watched her walk away, blushing and almost tripping over her own feet. She had a slight sway in her hips nontheless. The dark blue satin clinging to her curves fluttered as she moved, calling to my imagination and causing the throbbing in my boxers to increase. What was she wearing underneath? Had the kiss we'd just shared affected her the same way it did me? What I wouldn't give for a repeat... Again, I found myself in need of a cold shower.

When I was relieved – I might not want to taint Bella's images just yet, but sometimes my animalistic side gets the best of me – cleaned up and wide awake I found a note from my sister with instructions for the day. To me, tonight was just another party, but Alice took hosting our annual Halloween party very seriously and expected everyone involved to act accordingly. I spent the greater part of the day running errands and doing chores, while the girls set up the house, effectively keeping me from spending any time with Bella, let alone talk to her. When I had finally finished Alice's to do list, the girls had already locked themselves in her room to get ready. I wasn't allowed to disturb them, but Alice promised me it'd be worth it.

_It had better be..._

There wasn't much left for me to do so I went to my room to get changed for the party. When I got downstairs, Esme was already there and of course she'd brought food. She really was a mother to all of us, not just Jasper and Rosalie. I wondered how long my father would wait to propose to her; they'd been together for so long and they were good together. I heard Emmett's jeep pull up out front so I went outside to see if I could lend a hand. Emmett was convinced he could bring the keg in himself, but Jasper tried to take it off his hands, resulting in both of them stumbling down the hall. Rosalie called from the kitchen and I dragged a whining Jasper with me. The girls had emerged from Alice's room in the meantime and looked absolutely stunning. I mean, they were all cute as far as high school girls go, and Alice would ensure that her friends didn't look anything less than runway ready, so I was expecting this to some extent. Nothing could have prepared me, however, for the sight I was seeing now.

I barely recognized Bella.

Bella in her school uniform was gorgeous. Bella in her regular clothes was breathtaking. Bella in her sleep attire was... tempting. Bella in the hot pink sequined excuse for a dress with the stiletto heels was... like a supermodel. Or better yet, a heavenly vision, if you took in the fairy wings. Amazing. I couldn't keep my eyes off her. Despite my stupor I noticed Jasper gawking at a very nervous Alice. That's it. If anything, I'd get those two alone tonight.

We'd decided to take turns guarding the keg. Luckily I'd been assigned the first shift, but unfortunately that meant I had no idea where Bella was _and_ everyone would make their way to the kitchen first. And _that_ meant having to make small talk with people I didn't particularly care to see. Squealing coming from the front door alerted me to the arrival of Rosalie's friends Jane and Bree. They were nice girls, but a little too _Sorority Life_ and flirtatious with me and Jasper than I liked, especially now. Adding them to the presence of Lauren and Tanya, and I found myself dodging around at the party, trying to avoid their attention, with little success. I tried my hardest to stay polite, but Jane was getting on my nerves. Normally I didn't really mind Jane. It's not like she was forced upon us and usually she'd get the hint that I wasn't interested. She was just Rosalie's friend to me. Tonight she was wearing the same outfit as Rosalie and, even though Rosalie had coordinated somewhat with Emmett, this had apparently made her think she was coordinating with us too. Don't get me wrong, she was cute, but completely not my type.

_She wasn't Bella._

Jasper found himself in a similar situation with Bree. Apparently they'd decided that since one of them was with us, the other two should follow suit.

'Jazz!', I called out, 'Can you come and give me a hand? Sorry Jane,' I turned around, 'there's something I need to talk to Jasper about.'

'Sure, Edward, we'll talk later. We've got all night.'

Before I could contradict her, she'd turned and walked over to Bree, no doubt concocting some plan.

_Arrogant much?_

Not really. I'd seen the way they'd been looking at us lately and I knew that look. They were up to something.

Jasper clapped my shoulder, 'Thanks, man, she just wouldn't take the hint.'

We both laughed a little uncomfortably.

'Look, Jazz, I feel like I need to say this. I know you like my sister,' – he gulped – 'and I know she likes you too. No, shut it, let me finish. I don't know why you don't act on it, but if it's because of me...'

'No, that's not it. I mean, at first... maybe. But... I mean, look at Rose and Em, that wasn't a problem. Aside from the sorority chicks she hangs out with,' he laughed, 'But... I don't know. What if she doesn't like me the same way?'

I couldn't believe this. Was he really that insecure? Or blind?

'Jazz, dude, seriously... are you fucking blind? She obviously likes you and I know you guys kissed at her party last February,' – he looked seriously scared now – 'and I. Don't. Care. You're my best friend. You and Em. Just... go talk to her, okay? Because this shy thing you both seem to have going on is fun to watch but now it's getting old.'

He mumbled something that sounded like he might have actually been listening to me. Emmett came to take over guarding the keg, allowing me to walk around at the party. It was quite the success, but I couldn't really take a lot of credit for it. I'd just invited some people I had classes with and did things Alice told me to do. She planned most of it, together with Rosalie, both of them bossing us guys around in the days, weeks leading up to it. It had been the same with her Sweet Sixteen, worse even, since it was such a huge occassion to her. I didn't really mind, though. She was my little sister and if things like this made her happy, who was I to deny her? Her excitement was infectuous.

Even though he was bound to the kitchen for the time being, Emmett kept watching me like a hawk, which made it a little more difficult to get closer to Bella. I didn't want to cause a scene, because I didn't want to argue with him and doing so at the party would piss off Alice. I comforted myself with the fact that Emmett would be going home tonight, while Bella stayed here. Never thought I'd be excited for one of my two best friends to leave.

After my first round, I spotted Bella and Alice entering the living room. Knowing I couldn't just walk up to her like I had this morning, what with Emmett watching, I decided I could, however, let her know what I thought of her. Alice was looking kind of goofy as Bella made the comment that some guy liked her. See? I wasn't the only one to notice. At that moment I walked past them, slowing down so I could trace my fingers along her arm. Again I felt that jolt of electricity pass as soon as I touched her soft skin. I leaned down quickly, inhaling her heavenly scent, and whispered 'Amazing' in her ear, before continuing on my way back to the kitchen. I felt her stare, but couldn't look back, because honestly, that move had been nervewracking.

As if that weren't enough stress, I felt the sudden urge to compensate for my forwardness towards Bella by hanging out with Emmett. He saw my conflicted expression, but I was able to explain it as being annoyed by Tanya, Lauren and Jane. I hoped this would pass. I didn't like feeling so uneasy around my best friend. Luckily, Emmett wasn't as perceptive as Jasper and also just a cheery person in general. He started cracking jokes and making snide comments about some of the costumes people chose to wear. I mean, a whoopee cushion? While your date is wearing a negligé and a halo?

'Some people are in desperate need of a stylist, I agree,' Alice giggled as she joined us, 'Just wait till I'm done with college, I'll be swamped with clients!'

We laughed for a bit, while Alice was getting some drinks. I noticed Jasper walking up to Bella and striking up a conversation. Another reason why he was such a good friend: he had met his friend's sister just a few hours ago, but was already trying to make her feel at home and welcome within our group.

'Ali, I think Bella would like her drink by now', I suggested.

'Then why don't you bring it over?', she retorted with a wink.

Emmett's eyes shot to mine, but before he could say anything, I interrupted.

'No, she's _your_ friend. Besides, I really think you should talk to Jasper. You might be surprised', I said as I gently pushed her in the desired direction.

'Yeah, and tell him it's his turn with the keg. I wanna go see what Rose is up to,' Emmett added, 'They so need to just come out and hook up for real,' he said when Alice had left, 'before some idiot snatches her up.'

I couldn't agree more. I only hoped he'd see Bella and me that way too. And soon.

Bella and me. I liked that thought.

Keeping myself busy, I decided to go around with a garbage bag to collect empty cups. We'd need to clean up the next day, but that job didn't have to be harder than it needed to. After dumping the bag with the trash out back, I couldn't find Bella. I did spot Jane, so I quickly turned around, not wanting to publicly offend Rosalie's friend tonight, and especially not wanting to humiliate Bella by being seen with another girl hanging all over me.

_Again with the cockiness..._

Sorry, but in this case, it was true.

Scanning the room, I found her standing near the fireplace, talking to a boy I figured must go to school with her and Alice. He was your typical nerd: bad hair, bad skin, oldfashioned glasses and geeky clothes. Or was that his costume?

I nudged a girl I knew to be in Alice's class, 'Who's that geek over there by the fireplace?'

She looked over to where I pointed.

'That's Eric Yorkie. Hey, is that Bella Swan talking to him? That's so nice of her. He's a real loner, I'm surprised he came at all.'

So, not only was she drop dead gorgeous, incredibly smart...

_... your best friend's sister..._

... and kind of shy, she also was kind. I don't know how well she knew this boy, but seeing as he was a loner, she was a little shy, and Alice had kept her busy all week, I guessed that she didn't. So her talking to him here could only mean one thing: she was trying to let him in and enjoy the party. If I hadn't fallen for her already, I would have now.

'Oh my...,' the girl gasped, 'you're Alice's brother...'

_Duh._

'I'm Heidi', she giggled.

I turned to face her briefly to acknowledge her and simultaneously thank her for providing the info that made me want Bella even more, and noticed that not only was her name Heidi, she was dressed as Heidi as well. Very original.

I scanned the room to see if Emmett was around, but I didn't see him or Rosalie, for that matter. I did, however, see Tyler near the keg, obviously having had quite more than his share. Again. Didn't that guy ever learn? He seemed to have laid his eyes on something and I could imagine what, or who, that could be. Following his gaze confirmed it. Bella. I wasn't going to let him harass her again. Luckily I was closer to her this time, so I quickly made my way over to her.

'Thanks, Heidi, now if you'll excuse me...'

'Bye... Edward...'

I mentally rolled my eyes. Why had I conceded in inviting these high school girls again? Right, to please Alice. Well, making my sister happy, especially after she practically forced me to admit my feelings to Bella this morning, was worth dealing with teenage hormones for one night.

I reached Bella in a few seconds. She hadn't noticed me yet, as I was coming up behind her, but the Eric kid had, judging by his widening eyes. I gently touched her bare shoulder and whispered for her to follow me. I walked down the hall towards my father's office, knowing we wouldn't be interrupted there.

_Big plans?_

No. I just wanted her away from Tyler. And having some alone time with her wouldn't hurt either. Opening the door, I looked over my shoulder and was glad to see she was following me and Tyler was nowhere in sight. I walked in and left the door open.

I flicked on a light right before Bella stumbled in. I didn't even give her time to say anything. Instead, I closed the door behind her and pinned her against it. My hands moved up and down her arms and I leaned in closer to her. Her scent was... heaven. Yes, she was wearing perfume, but there was more to it. I knew each perfume smelled different, depending on a person's skin and natural scent. The combination in Bella was surely intoxicating. She blushed and looked up at me through her thick lashes, the sight of which made my breathing hitch for a moment. She was so beautiful. I leaned down and pressed my lips to hers in an urgent kiss.

I hated that we were being secretive like this, but I didn't want anyone beside my sister find out before I'd talked to her brother again. So, I savoured what I could for now, letting out a happy sigh as I deepened the kiss. I felt her smile against my lips and pulled back, curious.

'I just like hearing you say my name', she said.

Well, I just happened to like saying it. When I kissed her again, she moaned softly. She actually moaned! I wrapped my arms around her an lifted her up so I could place her on top of my father's desk.

_If only he knew what you were up to._

Shut up. I never did anything like that in his office.

_But you wouldn't mind now._

I just wanted to enjoy her company for a moment. We still had a party to attend for the rest of the night.

'I've been waiting all day to do this,' I confessed, 'I've wanted to kiss you all day.'

'Then why didn't you?', she breathed.

'Alice kept you hostage and I didn't want to cross her.'

_When did you become such a pussy?_

Have I mentioned how scary that little pixie could be when she was angry?

'I came _this_ close, though. You don't know how it's tortured me! And then I saw you, dressed like this,' I took a moment to look her over again, 'I had to keep reminding myself that Emmett is here too tonight and I have to behave. But you're making it very, _very_ difficult...', I trailed off.

And she was. Just seeing her from across the room had me hard, but now that I was alone with her, holding her in my arms, I was really fighting with myself to stay in control and not grind into her. I didn't want to be too forward with her. Not this early.

She gripped the dogtags we had made for authenticity and pulled me closer again.

'Glad to know I'm not the only one, but shut up and kiss me again already.'

I happily complied. Bella's hands made their way up my chest, over my shoulders and into my hair. I loved the feeling of her grabbing fistfuls and tugging gently, holding me close. The sensation made me groan softly and I heard her gasp as I moved to place soft kisses along her neck and collarbone.

Suddenly, I felt Bella tense in my arms at the same time I heard the door open. We were caught.

_Please don't let it be Emmett. Please don't let it be Emmett._

'Edward Anthony Cullen. What the fuck do you think you're doing?'

Rosalie. I let out a sigh.

'Just this week you're telling us about Bella and now I find you slutting it up with.... Oh, hey Bella', she snickered as Bella moved around me and waved at Rosalie.

'Rose, you're kind of interrupting. What do you want?', I said, both relieved and annoyed.

'I was looking for Carlisle. Tyler got drunk – again – and tried to hit on Jessica. Not really a smart move, since she's been glued to Mike all night. Cliff notes: we kicked Tyler out but Mike might have a broken nose.'

Rosalie knew very well my father and Esme wouldn't be in his office. I got the feeling she was also checking on me. Maybe to protect Bella? Nevertheless, she interrupted the first and only moment I'd had with Bella all day.

'I'll go get him', I sighed, reluctantly letting go of Bella.

'Oh,' Rosalie said before I walked out the door, 'and my brother finally had the nerve to tell your sister he's been in love with her since she started high school. They're out on the back porch making goo-goo eyes at each other.'

'Finally', the three of us laughed simultaneously.

The remainder of the party was relatively normal, quiet even. Mike's nose was in fact broken, so my father drove him and Jessica to the hospital and took him home afterwards. The party quieted down fairly soon after that, but I don't think any of us minded much. The keg had been drained; the one incident aside, it had been a success; Jasper finally admitted his feelings for Alice; Emmett got to take his girl home – the horny basterd had been looking at her with lustful eyes all night; and I had gotten to kiss Bella again. We decided to leave cleaning up until morning, since we were all too tired to care at the moment. I had really wanted to wish Bella good night, but Ben was too tired to drive home and Jasper just didn't want to leave, so I had to set Ben up in one of the guest rooms and pull out a sleeping bag for Jasper in my room, while Alice dragged her friends to her room and closed the door.

Sunday morning I woke up to the mouthwatering smell of Esme cooking breakfast. Jasper, Ben and I made ourselves useful and started cleaning up after the party. We mainly just had to gather the cups and some decorations. We were about finished and just needed to put some of the furniture back in place, when Esme called out to us that breakfast was ready.

It was pretty cute watching Jasper and Alice interact, now that they didn't have to hold back anymore. They still acted a bit shy at first, but as soon as Alice sat down next to Jasper, they exchanged a look that made me want to avert my eyes, feeling as though I were intruding on a very private moment.

Then, Bella surprised everyone, myself included, when she walked in, didn't hesitate one bit, walked straight over to me and gave me a soft kiss. I sat slightly stunned, before grinning like a moron. I was lost in her timid smile and adorable blush, seeing nothing but her. Alice was cheering and clapping, practically bouncing out of her seat.

'I knew it, I knew it, I knew it!', she exclaimed.

'Pix,' I said, 'you knew yesterday. What's with the excitement now?'

'Well, yeah... but now you've gone public.'

'Then why did you warn me Friday to be careful?', Bella asked.

Alice had warned Bella about me? Why?

'Just looking out for you, B. This is wonderful!'

'Don't have a parade just yet. If I want to make it till next weekend, I need to talk to Emmett first.'

'Don't worry about it, lil' E,' Jasper said, 'you'll be fine. You know he's just protective over his lil' sis.'

Of course I knew that, but that didn't make me any less nervous. We made everyone promise not to say anything about it for the time being. Esme just looked at both me and Jasper with a happy smile.

Later in the day, my father came to my room when Jasper and I had just finished cleaning up after is unexpected sleepover.

'Can I talk to you boys for a minute?'

I motioned for him to come in. He cleared his throat.

'Well, first I'd like to compliment you, all of you, on how you handled everything last night. You made both Esme and myself proud and I didn't expect anything less of you. Secondly, I'm glad you both seem to have found someone special.'

_What a corny way of putting it._

'I know you are mature, responsible young men and I don't doubt your intentions with Alice and Bella. However, you must keep in mind that they are still young girls. I expect you to treat them with care and respect and try your hardest not to hurt them. Jasper, you are like a son to me, but Alice is my little girl...'

'Don't worry, dad, if he screws up, I'll be the first to kick his ass', I laughed.

'The same goes for you, Edward. Be careful with Bella.'

As much as I appreciated his sentiment, I thought it a little premature. It had only been a day.

We talked a little while longer about the party, until we heard the girls leave Alice's room.

To a third party observer it probably looked comical: Alice and Bella started to blush, while Jasper and I couldn't contain our smiles, upon seeing each other.

Jessica was going to see how Mike was doing, dropping Ben and Angela of on the way.

I took Bella's hand and tugged gently; she looked at me expectantly.

'I want you to myself for a while,' I explained, 'All weekend I've had to share you with others and watch my every move because of Em.'

I quickly guided her to my room, glad Jasper and I had just tidied it somewhat. I stood by the door, allowing her to look around, feeling nervous all of a sudden. This wasn't the first time a girl was in my room, but Bella wasn't just some girl. I hoped she liked it, because I wanted her to feel comfortable here. She looked so cute in a simple pair of jeans and a purple v-neck sweater. Completely different from last night, but no less stunning. Eventually, she turned to face me and blushed again.

'What?'

'Nothing. I just like seeing you here.'

'Oh... Did you mean what you said earlier, about Emmett?'

'About him killing me? Yeah, I guess so. It won't be that bad, though. I just have to talk to him and soon. I'll make him understand.'

She still had a worried look on her face.

'Don't worry about it, baby. I'll deal with it. I just want to be with you. What time do you have to go home?'

She moved closer to me and slippend her hands in mine.

'Actually, I'm going over to Em and Rose in about an hour. And I promised Rose last night that she wouldn't have to cover for us for long. So... maybe you could come with me?'

That worked out perfectly! I could spend more time with her today and talk to Emmett.

'Of course I'll come with you!'

She broke into a smile, obviously relieved. I pulled her closer and cupped her cheek in my hand, gazing into her eyes. He eyes fluttered closed and she leaned into my embrace as I closed the last few inches between our lips. I don't think I could ever grow tired of kissing her. The sensation of her soft, full lips moving with mine, together with her intoxicating scent and delicious taste was pure heaven. I couldn't get enough of it.

An hour and a half later we were knocking on Emmett and Rosalie's door. The entire drive over I'd held Bella's hand. Right before Rosalie answered the door, Bella squeezed my hand and released me from her grip.

'Hey Eddie', Emmett said when I walked in.

I hated that nickname. But somehow I was stuck with it. I actually prefered Jasper's _big E_ and _lil' E_ to distinguish between me and Emmett.

'Wasn't expecting you today. What brings you here?'

'Bella needed a ride...'

'That's cool, thanks, man. Wanna stay for dinner? We're ordering pizza.'

Rosalie insisted I'd stay to watch a movie with tehm. Since she obviously knew about Bella and me, I figured she wanted to provide ample opportunity for us to tell Emmett.

_Great. No pressure there._

We let the girls decide which movie to watch, so we ended up watching _Pirates of the Caribbean._ The pizzas came when Keira Knightley was being squeezed into a tightly corseted dress and we all dug in. Emmett and Rosalie were cuddled together on one couch, with Bella and me sitting rigidly on opposite ends of the other couch.

_Talk about awkward._

By the time Orlando Bloom was breaking Johnny Depp out of prision I couldn't stand it any longer. I was sitting within arm's reach of the most amazing girl I'd ever met and I was afraid to get closer and let her know, because of her _brother_?

_I could've told you earlier that was stupid._

I decided to be bold and just risk it. I wanted it out in the open. So, when she next leaned over to grab another slice, I motioned for her to sit down next to me. I draped my right arm over the back of the couch, playing with a strand of her hair, mesmerized by the soft texture of it. I took her free hand in my other hand. She looked up at me, blushed, and averted her eyes back to the tv. We sat like that for a few minutes and I could almost relax.

'What the hell?', Emmett suddenly yelled.

He must have finally noticed me holding Bella's hand.

'Kitchen. _Now!_'

I squeezed Bella's hand, got up quickly and followed him into their kitchen.

'What the fuck, Eddie?', he spat, 'I thought I told you to stay away from my baby sister! And now you're touching her? In _my_ house? Exactly what part of _stay away from her_ don't you understand?'

I figured I'd better let him get it all out before speaking up.

'Well, Em, for starters, you told me to stay away from her until _she_ decided otherwise.'

He huffed.

'Dude, come on, she hangs out with _my_ little sister, who, by the way, started hooking up with _your_ brother-in-law. Finally. Anyway, Bella spent the weekend at our place and I ran into her over breakfast yesterday. What was I supposed to do? Ignore her?'

'Yes!', he practically shrieked.

'That's ridiculous!'

'No, it's not! I don't want you fucking my little sister!'

'Em, how many times do I have to tell you: I'm not fucking her! I don't even want to...'

'What, she's not hot enough for you?'

Í didn't know what to respond to that. One moment he was accusing me of taking advantage of Bella, the next I was being a jerk for _not_ wanting her.

'That's not even the point. I told you last week that she's not an easy fuck for me. Hell, we've only kissed! But... I want more with her. I... I want her to be my girlfriend.'

We were both shocked by that statement. I hadn't even thought about it like that until now. I only knew that I wanted to spend time with her, get to know her, be with her... yes, I wanted her to be my girlfriend.

Emmett was about to say something, but my revelation caught him off guard. We both just stared at each other for a few minutes. He obviously needed to process everything.

'Are you serious?'

I nodded.

'Dude, you never have girlfriends...'

'I know. That's what scares me. I've never done this. But I want to... with her. She's special.'

He grinned, 'Don't I know it. I had to scare off pretty much every other guy back in London... Not the point, though', he added when he saw the pained expression on my face.

I didn't want to think about any other guy getting close to Bella. Even if it was before I had met her.

_You're in way over your head already_.

Don't I know it. There was just something about her...

'It's just, she's my _little_ sister, man... I don't want her to get hurt. Sure, Rose and Jazz keep telling me how you're different from what I've experienced with you and I try to keep that in mind... But you have to understand my point of view.'

'I do, really. I know I don't really have a good track record when it comes to girls, but that was before... And I've grown tired of that, like a while ago. You know that too. Please, just trust me and give me a chance. I really need your okay on this. Not that I'll stay away from her anyway, but... you know what I mean. I need my best friends.'

He was silent again. I started to get really nervous. His approval meant so much to me. I was going to see Bella regardless, but it would be so much better if her brother would be okay with it. I didn't want to go around and lie to him or get in a fight.

Finally, after what felt like hours, he spoke again.

'I guess... if you're really serious... I could be okay with this.'

I couldn't stop the huge smile coming up when I heard him say this.

'But,' he stopped me from interrupting, 'if I _ever_ find out you hurt her, I _will_ kill you. You may be my best friend, and Rose's almost stepbrother, but Bella is my baby sister and it's my job to protect her. So if you value your life, you'd better be good to her', he threatened.

'Em, I wouldn't have it any other way. My dad gave me and Jazz a similar speech this morning. Besides, I wouldn't dream of hurting Bella.'

He finally smiled somewhat and pulled me in for a one-armed hug, roughly patting my back.

'Thanks, Em', I said, before we returned to the livingroom.

Bella and Rosalie both looked very anxious when we walked back in, visibly relaxing as they saw us smiling. Well, I was grinning like a fool, whereas Emmett had a somewhat reserved smile plastered on. I gave a small nod to the both of them and sat down next to Bella again, resuming our previous position. Johnny Depp had progressed to switching side back and forth, but I couldn't really concentrate on the movie. I was too happy being able to sit here with her, _with_ her brother's approval. All too soon, the end credits filled the screen. I wasn't ready to go home yet.

'It's still early, let's watch the second one', Rosalie suggested.

'By the way, Bells,' Emmett said, 'I'm driving you to school tomorrow.'

She started to protest, but I quickly interjected.

'I'll tell Alice she doesn't have to pick Bella up tomorrow.'

Rosalie put in the second movie and continued snuggling close to Emmett. Bella got up to get another drink. When she returned, instead of letting her sit down, I pulled her onto my lap. She blushed, but leaned into me, putting her right arm around my shoulders and playing with the hairs in my neck. As soon as she started doing that, the movie was lost to me. For a moment I forgot we were in her brother's livingroom. I trailed kisses along the soft skin of her neck, breathing in her scent. I noticed she started breathing heavier as my own heart rate picked up.

Placing a small kiss just below her ear, I whispered, 'Be my girlfriend?'

Bella gasped and froze. But before I could start to panic that maybe this was too soon to ask, she turned around with a gorgeous smile and kissed me passionately.

'Does that... mean _yes_?', I asked between kisses.

She nodded.

'Yes.'

I hugged her closer and continued kissing her. I was elated.

Bella Swan was my girlfriend!

I was pulled down from my high when I heard Emmett groan.

'Can you please behave? I don't need to see that yet.'

Bella blushed and pulled away. Great. Now she was embarrassed.

'Why don't you show Edward your room, B?', Rosalie offered, 'He's only seen it before you moved in. I'm sure he'd like to see how it turned out.'

Actually, I had a pretty good idea what her room looked like, since I'd helped get it ready for her. Still, having Bella show it to me, being able to be alone with her for a while... I wasn't going to turn that down.

'No funny stuff!', Emmett called after us.

_No, Em, I intend on ravishing your little sister on every flat surface and against every wall in your home._

Best not be sarcastic with him right now.

'So... uhm... this is my room,' Bella started, 'Rosalie went a little overboard, calling me every other day to get my opinion and...'

'Wanna know something?', I interrupted her nervous explanation.

She looked up at me and nodded.

'I helped decorate this room for you.'

Bella's eyes widened.

'I did. Emmett asked me and Jasper to help out. Ordered us, more accurately', I chuckled.

She turned around and looked at her room again.

'So, what did you do exactly?'

'Let me see...', I said.

I moved to stand behind her, wrapping my arms around her waist and resting my chin on her shoulder.

'I put in the lights...'

'I like those lights.'

'I put up those shelves over there...'

She put her hands over mine and stroked them softly.

'Good shelves', she said as she leaned her head back against my shoulder.

I had to swallow the lump that had risen in my throat before I was able to finish. She had no idea what she did to me.

'And I set up your bed for you', I finally managed to whisper.

I heard her sharp intake of breath at my revelation. Then, I realized what I just said. Fuck! She could've taken this completely the wrong way. But, for the second time today, Bella took me by surprise.

She turned around in my arms, looked me straight in the eye and said, 'I love my bed', then kissed me.

She stepped back but held on to me, continuing our kiss. We stumbled towards her bed and fell down on it, laughing. Who would have thought that just a few weeks ago I was helping my best friend turn his spare room into his little sister's room, and now I was laying on the bed I put together, kissing said girl.

I had to remind myself to take it slow, though. I didn't want to overwhelm or rush her. Being with her like this mad that difficult, however. She fit in my arms perfectly and molded her body to mine. I tried not to lean too heavily on her, not wanting to crush her with my weight, but she pulled me in closer.

'Bella...', I groaned.

'What?', she breathed.

'I really want to behave... but you're making it extremely difficult...'

She blushed but also looked up at me with a smile that was almost my undoing. Did she even know what she was doing to me?

_Let's hope not, because that's even hotter._

Still, I had to regain some control. I leaned back on one arm and took one of her hands in my free one. She looked up at me and sighed. This felt so... _right_.

'Let's just... slow down a little, okay?', I said reluctantly.

We laid like that for a while, just looking at each other with our fingers entwined. I don't know how long we spent like that, but after a while I noticed Bella was dozing off somewhat. It was getting pretty late after all and it had been a busy weekend. I moved to get up so she could get under the covers, but Bella held on to me and snuggled closer. I figured it couldn't hurt to stay a little while longer. I was amazed that she already felt comfortable enought with me to fall asleep in my arms. When her breathing had evened out completely, I gently moved her off my chest and pulled the covers over her.

'Goodnight, sweet girl', I whispered in her ear.

She smiled in her sleep and I couldn't resist softly kissing her lips before going home.

Bella Swan was my girlfriend.


	19. Confessionals

**A/N: Thank you for all the reviews so far. I don't answer every single review, but trust me, I read them all!**

******Disclaimer: I don'****t own Twilight or the characters. They're all Stephenie Meyer's invention. I just love to incorporate them into the figments of my own imagination.**

* * *

19. Confessionals

Things progressed pretty fast after that amazing weekend. To think that just Friday night, I was only crushing on Edward, convinced I was nothing more to him than his sister's friend. Then having him come out and say he liked me too, Saturday morning, sneaking off to kiss later that night... I never expected that.

But the best part definitely had been Sunday night. At first it was a bit awkward, sitting there, and for a while I was worried about Emmett's reaction, especially when he started yellig and went to talk to Edward in the kitchen. But when they came back out, everything seemed fine. Edward even pulled me onto his lap and we sort of made out a little. And the best thing: Edward asked me to be his girlfriend! I couldn't be happier. Yes, it was a bit corny that he asked, but on the other hand, it saved us the awkward conversation of where this was headed.

When I showed him my room I found out he'd actually helped decorate it, which was a little weird to think about. I mean, I hadn't even met him yet, and he had already been in my room, probably more that I had been thusfar. Lying on my bed, kissing, was amazing, even though Edward seemed to be holding back. I ended up falling asleep in his arms, which I could definitely get used to... I was a little confused though, when I woke up in my pyjamas Monday morning. I couldn't remember putting them on, and even though I was highly attracted to Edward, I didn't want to think about him undressing me like that.

_No, you want to be conscious for that._

But Rosalie quickly eased my worries, explaining that Edward told her when he left that I fell asleep in my clothes and she changed my clothes for me. Emmett drove me to school, using the time we spent in his car to have a brotherly talk with me.

'So...', he started.

I waited for him to continue, but he didn't.

'So...', I prompted.

He sighed, 'Look, Bells, I don't really want to have this conversation with you... but I have to.'

He looked positively uncomfortable. I felt kind of bad for him. My brother was an generally cheery person and he didn't really like to deal with serious issues. He would, of course, if he had to, but it killed his mood. He always tried to see the sunny side of things, so I could imagine he was less than thrilled at the moment.

'Just say it, Em.'

'Well, I know you're seventeen and all... but you'll always be my little sister and I just want what's best for you. If it's Edward, fine, but please be careful.'

Okay, this was weird. I was expecting some sort of speech, maybe even an argument, but this... he was kind of sweet, protective and even mature. What the hell did he and Edward talk about last night? Or better yet, what had Edward told him?

'What do you mean?'

'You see, I know you've probably talked to Rosalie or Alice about it, too, and they know him differently, but the way I know him... Yeah, he's my best friend and he's great to hang out with, but like I told you before, he doesn't have the best reputation when it comes to girls. So you can imagine I'm a little hesitant to let him get closer to you...'

_Let_ him? I was pretty sure that in the end it was _my_ decision. I snorted and frowned.

'Shit. I'm fucking this up, aren't I? I don't mean to make your decisions for you, I just don't want to see you get hurt. I guess I'm just protective over you. I haven't seen you in so long. I want to look out for you. And…'

'Em, will you stop rambling? I get it, you love me, you've missed me, you're protective, and that's all fine. But will you please trust me?'

'I do trust you, Bells, I really do. But I'd hate to see you make mistakes…'

'Do you think Edward's a mistake?'

'No, I don't mean it like that. I meant mistakes in general. I'm your big brother, I'm supposed to look out for you.'

'Okay, fine. Look out for me. But don't overreact. And if you don't trust _my_ judgment regarding Edward, can you trust Rosalie's? Or Jasper's? They grew up with him. If he really was bad news, they would've told me, don't you think?'

He was quiet for a minute. We were close to school by now.

'That's true. And I talked to him last night. He seemed genuine, and you guys behaved. So that's good. I guess what I mean to say is, I trust you, I _want_ to trust him with you, but please be careful. And I want you to know you can tell me anything. Just... take care of yourself, don't let him rush or intimidate you and...'

I put my hand on his arm, trying to appease and silence him.

'I will, Em. Thank you. I really appreciate this, even though you're an overprotective goofball...'

He laughed.

'Just... take it easy on Edward, will you? He was really stressing out over your reaction. You're important to both of us, you know? Besides, I'm not ever sure where this is going yet. Well, I'm gonna be late for class. Thanks for the ride and I'll talk to you soon, okay?'

'Sure. Bye, Bells, have a good day.'

'Bye, Em, love you.'

Glad that was over and done with. I loved Emmett and he meant well, but this was a little too… I don't know. _Not_ us. I pecked him on the cheeck and got out of the car. I noticed a few people looking my way, but didn't pay them much attention.

I hurried to class, where I was met by an exhilirated Alice. All day long, she couldn't get over how finally something was happening with Jasper, how amazing the party had been, how awful Mike's broken nose looked, how sweet, wonderful and sexy Jasper was... I could barely get a word in to agree with her. During lunch, she got a phonecall.

'Hey! … Yeah, Gym last… Hm-mm… Yup, see you then, bye.'

When she ended the call, she shot me a look.

'What's that about?', I asked.

'Nothing,' she said innocently, 'Are you still coming over to my place after school?'

'Don't I always?', I joked.

Even though I had only met Alice last week, it felt like we had known each other for years. Hanging out at Alice's had become second nature to me.

'Just checking.'

She was up to something. I just didn't know what yet.

When we were changing after Gym, she insisted I put on some mascara and lipgloss and she actually fussed over my hair for five minutes. I finally gave in and just asked.

'Alice, what's going on?'

Her hands stilled as she looked away guiltily.

'Alice...', I pressed.

'Edward is picking us up!', she blurted out.

Instantly, my body reacted; heart hammering in my chest, face flushing, sweaty palms...

The few girls that were left in the lockerroom turned their heads in our direction and started whispering amongst themselves, frantically checking their appearances in any shiny surface that was close by. Really?

'What?', I squeaked.

'He insisted I ride with Angela this morning, and during lunch he called me to tell me he's picking us up. Come on, we've got to go, he's waiting!'

She pulled me up from the bench and yanked me outside, barely giving me enough time to grab my things. Why hadn't I known he was picking us up? He had been texting me throughout the day... I stumbled outside after Alice and almost ran her over as she stopped at the parking lot. When I looked up and followed her gaze, I saw Edward across the lot, leaning against the hood of a shiny, silver Volvo.

_A Volvo? Seriously? __How quaint can you get? He'd better have a good reason to have a car like that._

Then again, Edward could probably make a cart and donkey look good. I exhaled heavily, trying to calm myself a little before walking over. A pair of faded and torn jeans hung low on his hips and, combined with a black leather jacket and grey hooded sweater, he looked absolutely delectable. He had a cigarette dangling from his lips, adding a bad boy edge to his scruffy appearance. I felt butterflies in my stomach at the sight of him. Edward's eyes fell on me and he smiled that gorgeous crooked smile.

'Eddie!', Alice screamed.

Even at this distance I could see him roll his eyes. I had noticed before that he had this reaction when someone called him that. He must not like it.

'Hey, Pix!', he yelled back and Alice frowned.

We made our way over as fast as possible without running, me tripping over my own feet several times. We stopped a few feet short of the car.

'Hi', I said.

_Very smooth._

He put out his cigarette, grinned at Alice, and closed the gap between us in two quick strides.

'Hey', he said, before cupping my face in his hands.

He leaned down and I was lost in his scent. Again, the Armani Code, this time complemented with a hint of cigarette and something else I couldn't pinpoint. He smelled so... masculine. My eyes fluttered closed in anticipation and the butterflies were going crazy. Then, I felt his lips gently graze mine, almost brushing against them, barely touching. Immediately, the jolt I first felt Saturday night was present again. I dropped my things, snaked my arms around his waist and leaned up, increasing the pressure of our lips. His tongue traced my lips, I opened my mouth to him and let him explore. I could taste the cigarette, but surprisingly, I didn't mind. It suited him. For a moment, it was just the two of us in our own little bubble.

Until Alice honked impatiently. Reluctantly we broke apart, Edward took my bags from me – yes, plural, since I had my weekend bag, gym bag and book bag – put them in the trunk of his car and opened the passenger side door for me. When we had both gotten in, he made a half-hearted apology to Alice.

'Sorry, Ali, but I had to properly greet Bella. I haven't seen my girlfriend all day', he said as he pulled out of the school parking lot.

Alice waved dismissively from the backseat, 'Yeah, yeah, whatever. Just don't... wait... _girlfriend_?'

Edward smiled at me and took my hand, causing me to blush.

'What?', she shrieked, 'When did this happen?'

Edward chuckled at Alice's enthusiasm.

'Last night. After I talked to Emmett.'

'Oh my gosh, this is so awesome! I can't believe it! My brother and my best friend... You'd better not screw this up though. I won't let you hurt B. I swear, I'll kick your ass!'

Edward fullout laughed.

'You might have to get in line for that. Dad, Jazz, Rose _and _Em all threatened to kill me in various torturous ways if I fuck up.'

He turned to look me in the eye and added softly, 'But I promise it won't be necessary.'

I didn't know how to respond to that, so I just smiled back at him.

'Surprised to see me?', he asked.

'Yeah, you never said anything about this in your texts today, so...'

'Good surprise, though?'

'Very.'

Then it registered that Alice had just refered to me as her best friend. Wow. That was huge. I had never had a girl best friend before. I actually found myself tearing up a bit. When we arrived at the Cullen house, Edward helped me out of the car and went to get my bags from the trunk. I hurried over to Alice and hugged her fiercely.

'What brought this on?', she asked while hugging me back.

'You're my best friend, too', I choked out.

We finally managed to pull ourselves together and enter the house. Edward dropped my bags in the hall and walked over to me.

'I'll let you get to your homework first, but come see me when you're done. I've missed you today.'

He gave me a quick kiss and went up to his room.

Alice and I got settled in her room and got to work. We didn't really have a lot to do, so we finished early. We talked some more about the party, Jasper and Edward. Apparently, Jasper had been texting her non stop since Sunday afternoon and they were going on a date on Wednesday. I was happy for them. They were cute together and according to Rosalie it had been obvious they liked each other for quite some time.

'I was wondering why Edward was acting so weird this morning,' Alice said, 'but now it makes sense. Don't you agree it's great how everyone in our group is pairing up now? We actually all have boyfriends now, _and_ best friends! Oh wait, Rosalie doesn't…'

'What about Jane and Bree?'

'No, they're BFFs. In high school it was the three of them, but when they went to college, Jane and Bree joined a sorority. They asked Rose to join too, but she wasn't interested. It didn't really affect their friendship in general, but Bree and Jane bonded. I'm glad she didn't pledge, though. I like her individuality. Her friends sort of became these Barbie dolls.'

I couldn't agree more with her. I felt a little bad for Rosalie, too. Every girl should have a best friend.

'Why don't we be her best friends? It makes sense: she's my almost-sister-in-law and your almost-stepsister.'

'That's a great idea! Yes, let's!'

We decided to plan a sisterly/best friend get together to make it official. Alice's words, not mine. Still, a good plan.

'So... What's with the Volvo?'

Alice started laughing uncontrollably at my question.

'I know, right?', she managed between fits of laughter, 'A little too _soccer mom_ for _Sexward_.' – I frowned in confusion at that nickname – 'He had a BMW 6 series convertible that was like his _pussy wagon_' – I cringed – 'but then all of a sudden, last semester, he came home one day and announced he was selling it and getting the Volvo instead. He had it completely detailed, of course, but still... it's a freaking _Volvo_!'

'But why did he do that?'

'I honestly don't know. You should ask him. And then enlighten me', she winked.

I couldn't help but giggle at that. Alice was amazing. I was glad she considered me her best friend.

A little while later, I found myself in front of Edward's door. Alice was calling Esme to ask if she wanted to come over for dinner. She obviously wanted an excuse to spend time with Jasper, and inviting Esme over was one way of accomplishing that. I got a little nervous at the thought of going into Edward's room in a moment, being alone with him. Don't ask me why, I just was.

_Don't be a pussy. He asked you to come. So just suck it up and knock._

Edward was at the door instantly. He smiled and pulled me in for a kiss.

'You never have to knock, B, I've got nothing to hide from you.'

Well, that was good. If I could get the nerve to ask what I wanted to know right now. He noticed me hesitating in the doorway, deliberating whether or not to bring up the nickname and the car. He took my hand and gently tugged. I stepped forward into his room.

'I'm serious. I want you to feel comfortable here.'

I moved to take in his room. When I had been in here Sunday afternoon, I didn't really notice a lot. I was too preoccupied with kissing Edward and asking him to come with me that night. Also, this provided me with some time to gather my courage. Emmett might have told me not to let him intimidate me, but I doubt he meant in the way he was intimidating me now. I'd gotten the impression that Edward wouldn't pressure me to do anything I wasn't ready for, but I _was_ intimidated by his sheer presence. I was just little old me, a seventeen-year-old in a high school uniform who's nothing like the girls he preferred before. Yes, I'd seen the way several girls were eyeing him at the party, and even though I sucked at Maths, I could still put two and two together. So, yeah, slightly intimidated by my incredibly hot, in-demand boyfriend. I felt giddy at the thought. Edward Cullen was my boyfriend.

I slowly walked around his room, taking it in. For starters, it was huge, almost twice the size of my room. Considering the basic layout was the same as Alice's room, only in reverse, the differences were remarkable. Both rooms had a large window covering the long wall opposite the door, overlooking the backyard, and a walk-in closet and a bathroom behind the short wall on the far end of the room. But whereas Alice's room was a sunny yellow with warm accents, Edward's was a lot darker. The walls were a dark grey, more like anthracite, the carpet and velvety curtains a rich charcoal and his furniture was black with silver accents. The massive bookcase, the wooden desk, the black leather couch against the wall of the walk-in closet, where Alice's was completely taken up by a mirror. Not to mention the enormous bed in the middle of the room. It was placed slightly diagonally while facing the window. The frame was made of a dark iron and the bed was covered in black satin. The afternoon sun was streaming in, adding a warm glow. Despite the dark colors, I liked his room. It had and understated air of luxury. Safe from a message board above the desk, the mirror next to his door and a few framed pictures, the walls were empty. Edward apparently was very organized.

There was a picture on the wall above the couch and I stepped closer to get a better look. It was a family portrait, showing a younger version of Carlisle standing behind a beautiful woman, his hands on her shoulders. This must have been Edward's mother. Her hair was jetblack, like Alice's, styled in soft waves framing her delicate features. Here eyes were the same emerald green as Edward's and she had a loving smile. In her lap she held a toddler-sized Alice in a bright yellow dress. Next to them, holding his mother's hand, was an adorable little boy. Edward. The same unruly bronze hair, the same mischievous crooked grin and the same dazzling green eyes. Only, there was an innocence in the little boy's eyes that I hadn't seen in Edward.

'My mother', Edward said softly as he came up behind me.

'She's beautiful', I whispered.

Somehow I felt almost reverent, looking at this picture. Edward wrapped his arms around me and kissed my temple.

'Thank you.'

'You have her eyes.'

He was silent.

'And I see where Alice gets her looks. But your hair...?'

'My grandmother.'

'You look so cute here. How old were you?'

'Seven, I think.'

'What... uhm…'

I didn't know how to ask about his mother. It seemed so natural for Carlisle and Esme to be together.

'She died when I was eleven.'

'Oh... I'm sorry. I didn't mean to...'

'It's okay, love, you didn't know.'

'Do you miss her?'

'Yes. Every day. But Esme has been like a mother to me, to us, for a really long time now. I'm glad she and my father found each other. It makes it less… painful, I guess. She actually was a friend of my mother's, so we get to keep a little bit of her with us still.'

That must have been a little weird, though, I thought. But seeing how loving Esme was... I couldn't think ill of her for it. You can't help who you fall in love with, right?

'Elizabeth, my mother, would've been thrilled with you, by the way. So far, you're everything she told me she ever wanted for me.'

I didn't know what to say to that.

Instead I just leaned into him and whispered, 'Wow.'

So far I had spent more time at Alice's and at Emmett's than I had at my parents'. Sure, I slept there on schoolnights, but that was about it. I felt like I needed to spend time with Renee and also provide her with some sort of reason for my absence. She'd want to know who I was spending most of my time with. So Wednesday during lunch I texted Edward, asking him to pick me up from school and if he wanted to come over to have tea with my mother. He was surprisingly acquiescing. As far as I knew, guys weren't really all that willing to meet the parents. Especially after just five short days of dating. Then again, it already felt like it was more than just casual dating. Not that I wanted my parents to know _that_ just yet. But I figured they, or at least Renee, should know who I was with. Edward agreed. Good.

Before I could meet up with him after Gym, though, I had to deal with quite a disturbing rumour. Apparently, someone had seen me get out of Emmett's car Monday morning and getting in Edward's car that same afternoon. Shallow as they were, the school's gossip queens, also known as the cheerleading squad, had spread the rumour that I was dating both Emmett and Edward. Different versions of the rumour circulated, several even entertaining the thought of a threesome.

_Ugh, that's discusting. It's your _brother_ they're talking about!_

Don't I know it. It was quite disturbing to think about. But I tried not to take too much notice of it, hoping the rumours would die out and people would lose interest.

No such luck. The girls that started the rumour had also decided to confront me about my allegedly outrageous behavior that day after Gym. Unfortunately, Alice had hurried home to start getting ready for her big date with Jasper, leaving me to fend for myself. Three girls cornered me in the lockerroom when I was about to text Edward I'd be right out.

'Well, well, well, Bella,' a tanorexic bleached-blonde I recalled was named Whitney started, 'You sure don't waste any time making your move, now do you?'

I feigned ignorance. I barely knew her and it was none of her business anyway.

'We _saw_ you,' Britney sneered, flipping her long, black, straightened hair over her shoulder, 'kissing Emmett and making out with Edward. One isn't enough for you?'

I tried not to let their comments get to me, but they were just being ridiculous.

'What's it to you?'

All three girls huffed, like it was obvious. In their minds it probably was.

'Hello,' Courtney, the third girl, a copy of Whitney, said indignantly, 'they are clearly meant for us.'

I tried to stifle my laughter. These girls were delusional.

'And what makes you think that?'

'Duh,' Britney said, ever so eloquently, 'we're the head cheerleaders. We're supposed to date the hottest guys at U-Prep _and_ U-Dub. And you're intruding. So back off.'

I couldn't contain my laughter anymore.

'Dream on, girls. You can't date a guy who's taken and you definitely can't date a guy who doesn't even know you exist.'

'You're lying!', they shrieked in unison.

'Seriously, how pathetic are you? Now move, you're wasting my time. My boyfriend's waiting for me.'

'Which one?', Whitney muttered.

I wasn't going to dignify their insane thoughts with an answer, so I just exited the Gym building, making my way to the parking lot.

_Petty high school drama queens. Geez, get a life!_

They actually followed me to the parking lot.

_Well, if they want drama and gossip, I can give them a show._

I stalked over to Edward, who was waiting by his car. His face broke into a smile upon seeing me, but it shifted to a curious look when he noticed my aggravated expression.

'B? What's wrong, love?'

'Just play along', I ordered and dropped my bag to my feet.

Before he could respond I threw my arms around his neck and kissed him hard. He responded immediately, pulling me close against him and slipping his tongue in my mouth. Soon, I forgot what had gotten me so worked up and started to get all sorts of a different kind of worked up. I found myself pressing closer to Edward's body, both of us leaning heavily on his car. I held onto him tightly, playing with his silky hair, while his hands were gripping me around the waist and inching lower. There were three layers of clothing between his hands and my skin, and even more between our bodies, but his touch already left me tingling all over. A small sliver of skin was exposed between my jacket and my skirt, and when his fingers caressed it, my skin burst out in flames. That such a simple touch could be so intense... I was losing myself in Edward, in his kiss... At the very least, I forgot to breathe – again. I was starting to feel lightheaded when Edward broke away, leaning his forehead against mine. He was also breathing heavily.

'Not that I mind the PDA and the audience,' he said against my lips, smiling, 'but is there something bothering you?'

I waited for my breathing to calm down somewhat, so I could talk without panting too much.

'Cheerleader gossip. According to them I'm fucking both you and my brother.'

Edward laughed, 'And you let them get to you?'

I felt embarrassed by his question. Surely I should be above that. But I wasn't.

'B, that's perfectly normal. I'd hate to hear rumours about you. But people are going to talk regardless.'

'I know. They were just... getting on my nerves. They kept me from you.'

'Well, if this is how you're going to act when they do that, I really should thank them. I'm sure as hell not complaining about the boldness it elicits in you. I actually kind of like it', he grinned mischievously.

I blushed, but smiled.

'Let's get out of here, shall we? Time to meet your mother.'

He opened my door for me. When he walked over to his side of the car, I chanced a glance over to were Courtney, Whitney and Britney were still standing, mouths agape, eyes bulging. I stuck my tongue out at them. Childish, I know, but their reaction was priceless. They stomped off to their cars, texting furiously.

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**A/N: I'll be going on holiday in two weeks, which means I won't be able to update until mid-July, probably. I will take a notepad with me, though, so I can write on the road when I get the chance. I will post two more chapters before I leave, so that should get you through the short hiatus.**

**Further, I'd like to thank my RL friends Marly, Fabian, Laura and Sam for helping me bounce off ideas for this story. The guys are especially helpful when it comes to the male dynamics and conversations. And thank you, faithful readers/reviewers, you know who you are!**


	20. Meet the parents

******Disclaimer: I don'****t own Twilight or the characters. They're all Stephenie Meyer's invention. I just love to incorporate them into the figments of my own imagination.**

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20. Meet the parents

'Hi girls!', Renee called from the living room, 'How was school?'

Her eyes widened when she saw Alice wasn't with me.

_Feast your eyes on this, mom!_

'Alice couldn't come today', I explained, before introducing Edward.

He completely charmed Renee with his polite, gentlemanly manners. I didn't expect any less. When Edward excused himself to use the bathroom, she barely waited till he was out of earshot before asking the inevitable question.

'So... is this your boyfriend?'

I blushed and grinned. No need to answer.

'Well, sweetie, he seems like a very nice boy.'

_Boy? There's nothing boyish about him. He's all man._

'He's very polite... and so handsome!'

_Oh, you noticed, now did you?_

'But the way he looks at you... it's so intense... Are you being careful?'

'Mom! It's not like that!'

She raised an eyebrow at me. Damn her for being so perceptive.

'I mean, it's all very new, we're just getting to know each other.'

Luckily, she didn't push the subject any further. For now.

'Alright then. Just, be careful, okay? I know first loves can be overwhelming...'

Edward returned and we shared another cup of tea. I was anxious to be alone with him. Sitting next to him, not touching him, downplaying my feelings because Renee was watching our every move, no doubt interpreting every bit of it... it was unnerving. After a while I just stood up and made to leave.

'I'm gonna show Edward my room.'

'Okay...? But behave, will you? I don't want...'

'Mom!', I flushed, 'We're gonna study. You know, there are actually a few subjects that I struggle with, and Edward happens to know stuff.'

'Mrs. Swan, I promise we're not up to anything you wouldn't approve of. I respect Bella too much.'

Before either of them could continue their unspoken competition of making me blush ten shades of crimson, I pulled Edward off the couch and made my way out of the room.

'Yeah, yeah,' I muttered, 'Let's go.'

'Thanks for the tea...', Edward said as he trailed behind me.

When we were approaching my room, I got a little nervous about showing it to him. I had never had a guy in my room before, at least not a guy that wasn't just a friend. Yes, he had already been in my room at Emmett's place, but this was my official room, at my parents'. What if he didn't like it? My room at Emmett's had been coordinated by Rosalie, probably with Esme's help, so it was bound to be a success. For my room here I hadn't had that expert advice. I only asked that the walls be painted a soft shade of purple and deep purple curtains be ordered, but other than that, I basically was going to decorate this room myself. I thought it represented my personality pretty well, even if it was only half done; a little messy, but homy, and, well, purple. But what if Edward found it too girlie, or maybe even childish? Had I remembered to clean up a bit? It would be embarrassing, to say the least, if I happened to have underwear scattered around the room. Oh well, not much I could do about that anymore... Edward seemed to sense my hesitation, as he placed a hand on my lower back and kissed my neck.

'Uhm... sorry if it's kinda messy...', I said apologetically, before I opened the door.

I watched as he walked slowly around my room. There wasn't really that much to see. I hadn't even finished unpacking yet; my walls were mostly bare. I quickly texted Alice and Rosalie, asking them to come help me finish my room on Saturday. This could be some BFF bonding time.

'Not really much to see yet, I know,' I explained, 'I haven't been here that much...'

'I like the colors, they suit you. Like your other room.'

'Thanks.'

'Your mom's friendly.'

'She's a good judge of character. She likes you.'

He swiftly looked away, pretending to examine my bed.

_Did Edward I'm-so-sexy-it's-intimidating Cullen just _blush_?_

I closed the door and walked over to the bed, sitting crosslegged in the middle of it. Edward grabbed my bookbag from where I'd dropped it by the door and walked over to me. He carefully sat down on the edge of my bed, placing my bag between us, opening it.

'So... homework, you said,' he smirked at me, 'Is that all I'm good for?'

I stifled my nervous giggle. This gorgeous man was in my bedroom, sitting on my bed. For the last hour I'd been holding back, fighting the urge to reach out and touch him... and now he seriously wanted to help me do my homework?

_You've got to be kidding me._

'Actually... I don't have any... homework.'

He grinned.

'I'm still ahead in most classes, and I'll do Chem tomorrow with Alice during lunch.'

He smiled his dazzling crooked smile.

'So... you're saying we came up here... without needing to study? Hm... what to do with all that spare time?'

He tapped his chin, pretending to think.

'I'm sure you can think of something, mr. Cullen,' I teased and patted the spot next to me, 'Why don't you make yourself comfortable while you try to come up with something?'

Edward tossed my bag to the floor and moved next to me. But instead of either of us making a move after that, we sat in awkward silence.

_This is ridiculous! It's your room. Take charge!_

Right. I shouldn't be shy.

_You weren't when you attacked him in the parking lot. And now there isn't even an audience..._

But I mostly acted like that because I was angry with those girls.

_Are you sure?_

I don't know...

_You mean you didn't like how it felt, being in control like that?_

More like losing control...

_Exactly! Go for it!_

I chanced a glance at Edward out of the corner of my eye and caught him looking at me too. Yes. I could be bold. Especially in the privacy of my own room.

I swung my left leg over him, effectively straddling him. He looked up at me a little surprised. I took his head in my hands and leaned down to kiss him. Edward's hands moved from my knees, over my thighs, up to my hips, grasping me there and holding me tight. While his tongue explored my mouth, I lowered myself down onto his lap; one of his hands moved to my lower back, pressing me against him. I let out a contented sigh and fisted my hands in his hair, earning a groan from him. Because our bodies were pressed so close, I felt the vibrations of his groan throughout my body. I shivered in response.

Suddenly, Edward flipped us over so I was flat on my back, my legs wrapped around him. I gasped in surprise and he chuckled against my lips, moving ever so slowly to the collar of my shirt and back, leaving a scorching trail of kisses. Goosebumps broke out all over my skin and my breathing became labored. Feeling him so close against me, encaged by my legs, was so... arousing. The feeling was unfamiliar to me, but I really liked it, this warm feeling, this tightening of muscles unbeknowst to me until now. I squirmed a little, though, and involuntarily ground my hips against his. Oh my... what was _that_? I gasped and stilled. Edward's head was buried in my hair, placing kisses along my neck, but he pulled back at my reaction.

'Are you okay?', he whispered.

I nodded, wide-eyed.

'What?'

I was still rendered speechless.

'Baby, you're starting to get me worried.'

'Is that...?', I asked suggestively, while pushing my hips up against him once more.

He swallowed noisily and nodded.

'Because of... me?', I asked, a little shy for my own question.

He nodded again.

'Really?', I squeaked.

'Yes', he whispered.

'Just now or...?'

'B, this is pretty much a permanent fixture when I'm around you... or thinking of you...', he said hoarsely.

Wow.

_Edward Cullen gets turned on by me!_

I couldn't help but grin at his confession.

'You like that, don't you?'

I nodded, still grinning, and pulled his lips back to mine.

'Hm, Bella,' he groaned, and ground his hips against mine again, 'what you do to me...'

One of his hands moved under my skirt, to my ass, squeezing gently, while the other stroked the entire length of my leg, still wrapped around him, before moving up to my waist, my ribcage, hovering just below my breast... I arched off the bed, pushing myself into his hand, and when he cupped my breast and started massaging it, we both moaned. While he moved his hand from my ass to cupping my face, I slowly traced his face and trailed down his chest to the hem of his shirt. Tentatively slipping my hands underneath, Edward's breathing hitched and I felt his abs flex. Ever since our barely dressed encounter in his kitchen Saturday morning I'd been dying to feel his body again. Continuing our kiss, I trailed over his abs, then to his back, and I felt his muscles ripple under his skin, under my touch. I wanted to explore more, so I pushed his shirt up. He understood what I was getting at; he sat up and quickly removed his shirt. The motion allowed me to really appreciate how toned and well-defined he was; broad shoulders, muscular arms, tight abs, slim waist and just above the waistband of his jeans, a chiseled V leading down, together with a thin line of hair below his belly button, to the bulge in his pants. I licked my lips. He was so delicious. And to think that his present state of undress and arousal was because of _me_...

'Enjoying the view, baby?'

I nodded. He cocked an eyebrow.

'A little cocky, are we?', I retorted.

'Oh, you ain't seen nothing yet', he smiled.

'In that case, I'll continue discovering then', I said, sitting up.

Edward looked at me, then down, and grinned. I realized a little belatedly that sitting up with my legs still somewhat wrapped around him gave him full view of my panties. Not that my blue boyshorts were something to be ashamed of, but still... I rather unelegantly pushed him back, feeling the familiar blush creeping up to my face.

'Don't even think about it, mister,' I said in the best warning tone I could muster, 'we're not going there.'

He looked a little disappointed.

'Sit back,' I ordered, 'I want to look at my boyfriend's hot body some more.'

_Feeling bossy today?_

Edward leaned back on his elbows, eyeing me expectantly. I resumed my previous position, straddling him, and let my hands rest on his stomach. Softly, I traced the muscles there and the line of hair leading down. His eyes widened. I shook my head and smiled. I moved my hands up, towards his chest, and played with his chesthair. I hadn't thought I would like it. It hadn't even occured to me. Chesthair had never really factored into the equation.. I knew Emmett, though huge as a bear, was void of any. And it wasn't like Edward was particularly hairy. Like the scruff covering his jaw, it was just the right amount to make me want to run my fingers through it, or to lick him there. So I did both. He tasted about as good as he looked and smelled. The salty goodness that was Edward Cullen. I looked up and saw his head had fallen back and his eyes were closed. _I_ was the cause of that!

I moved my hands up further, to his shoulders, and tugged, silently asking him to sit up. I was sitting in his lap again and moved my hands to his back. Between his shoulderblades I felt a slightly different texture in his skin. Curious, I moved around him. Oh wow... Edward had a tattoo. It was about the size of my hand and consisted of an intricate triangular pattern pointing down. I traced it with my fingertips. It was beautiful.

'I didn't know you had a tattoo...', I said softly.

How hadn't I noticed before? I'd seen him in his underwear.

_Maybe your mind was otherwise engaged and too busy to notice his back._

'Uhm... yeah... well...'

'What is it?'

'A Celtic trifold knot.'

'Does it mean anything?'

'It can be a Trinity symbol, or an eternity knot. But in this case, it's a symbol for friendship.'

'Oh... that's nice. When did you get it?'

'When Jazz turned twenty-one, last summer.'

'Did it hurt?'

'Not really. It's more of an annoying feeling. Just the part directly over my spine was a little sensitive. Jazz and I pretty much toughed it out. But Rose had to hold Emmett's hand the entire time. It was pretty funny watching that big guy wince', he laughed.

'Emmett has one, too?'

'Yeah, the three of us got them together... Wait, you didn't konw?'

Apparently not. Why hadn't Emmett told me? It's not like I'd judge him. The design was beautiful, and the meaning behind it even more.

'No. But then again, it never came up,' I shrugged, 'It looks good on you, though.'

He turned around, 'You really mean that?'

'Of course I do', I said and place a kiss in the middle of the triangle.

Edward pulled me back into his lap and started kissing me again.

After a while Renee called us downstairs, because my father would be home soon. Edward fixed his shirt and I fixed me hair – it was practically screaming _we just made our for over an hour!_ – before joining her again in the living room.

'You have lovely home', Edward commented.

'Thank you, dear. We had a little help, though, I must confess,' Renee winked, 'my son's girlfriend's mother, Esme Hale, is a wonderful interior designer and she did an amazing job.'

I didn't know what to say. _Esme_ had worked on this house? I suspected Renee had met her at some point, Esme being Rosalie's mother, but I had no idea she had hired her. Edward recovered quickly, when I was still trying to control my surprised expression.

'Yes, she's very good at what she does. My parents hired her to do our house, too.'

Before Renee could delve any deeper into the subject, Charlie walked in; Armani suit, Gucci briefcase, cellphone stuck to his ear.

'I don't care,' he barked to whoever was on the other end, 'Make it happen!'

Even before we actually moved here, Charlie had been very busy with the office he was managing now. Apparently, it was a mess and needed a lot of fixing. He worked long days lately and was perpetually stressed. On of the reasons I was so glad Emmett was living close by; I could legitimately escape if need be. My father was clearly in need of a fishing or hunting trip. That usually calmed him down.

Charlie glanced around the room, noticed we had company and ended the call with an annoyed, 'See to it', before snapping his phone shut.

'Charlie, darling, I hope work wasn't too tiring today', Renee started and greeted him with a kiss.

He grunted in response. Okay, I can take a hint. I'd lived with them both long enough to know that a stressed, grunting Charlie would best be approached calmly, to the point and, most of all, briefly.

'Hi dad,' I said, 'Uhm...'

'Who's this?', he interrupted, eyeing Edward suspiciously.

_Uh-oh._

Edward stepped forward and extended his hand.

'Good evening, sir. I'm Edward Cullen.'

Charlie grunted, again, but shook Edward's hand. I could see he was going for a strong, firm handshake, but Edward didn't wince or anything and kept the polite smile on his face. The room fell silent then as Charlie kept glancing from Edward to me and back while I held onto Edward's hand like it was a lifeline. When the silence was becoming very uncomfortable, Renee thankfully stepped in.

'How did you two meet, by the way?', she asked.

I hesitated. So did Edward.

'Forgive me, Edward, but you just don't seem like you're in high school. You look older, and you don't wear the uniform... And we haven't been here that long, so I'm curious...'

'Well, mrs. Swan...'

'Renee, please.'

'Renee. Bella and I met at U-Dub.'

She frowned.

'Mom, remember I spent the weekend at Emmett's last week? He took me on a tour of the campus.'

I shot Edward a pointed look, pleading him to go along with this. If my parents knew I went out partying when I was at Emmett's, they probably wouldn't approve and limit my time there. I didn't want to give up on that.

'I was looking up some things for a class that was starting. We ran into each other in a coffee shop on campus. Literally. Bella bumped into me, spilled both our coffees over her shirt...'

Renee laughed, Charlie frowned, I started to blush.

'Yeah, clumsy me.'

Charlie's frown softened a little, so at least he could recognize the humor of that situation, even though we'd changed some of the details.

_And why exactly did you do that?_

Like I said, I didn't think my parents would be too thrilled knowing Emmett had taken me to a frat party.

'Anyway, Edward insisted he help me get cleaned up.'

'Well, I couldn't let her walk around in a dirty shirt for the rest of the day, now could I? So I showed her to the ladiesroom and gave her my shirt to change into.'

Hm, I remembered that. Edward taking his shirt off...

_Stop thinking of shirtless Edward!_

'That was very curteous of you', Renee said.

I blushed. She wouldn't think him very curteous if she knew what we were doing not half an hour ago.

'After that I gave her my number, so she could get the shirt back to me. We started texting and stuff and here we are', he smiled at me.

During the conversation we had moved back to the couch. Charlie leaned forward in an obvious attempt to stare Edward down.

'So, how old are you exactly?'

'Twenty-one, sir. I'm a junior at U-Dub.'

'And what do you plan on doing after you graduate?'

'I'm thinking about going to Law School here. My father would like for me to practice Medicine, like him, but it's just not for me.'

'Your father is a doctor?', Renee interjected.

'Yes, he works at Harborview.'

'Very well', Charlie grumbled and took out his newspaper.

'Dinner is ready in about twenty minutes,' Renee said, 'Will you be joining us, Edward?'

'I'd like to, ma'am, but I'm afraid I can't. My stepmother is expecting me home for dinner.'

Renee frowned when Edward called her _ma'am_, but smiled at him nontheless.

'Oh well, some other time then. It's been nice meeting you.'

'Likewise... Renee. I'd better get going. Mr. Swan.'

Charlie nodded and continued reading his paper. I walked Edward to the front door, aware of both my parents' eyes following us. Edward was aware too, because he only kissed me once, on the lips. Then he moved to whisper in my ear, voice low and seductive, his breath caressing my neck.

'I'll call you later.'

He pulled back and gave me his dazzling smile again, before quickly kissing me again. I was left speechless as well as breathless and could just manage to smile at him when he got in the Volvo and drove off.

That went pretty well.


	21. Clouding up my mind

******Disclaimer: I don'****t own Twilight or the characters. They're all Stephenie Meyer's invention. I just love to incorporate them into the figments of my own imagination.**

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21. Clouding up my mind

Somehow everything seemed to be going wrong today. It started even before I got up. The last couple of nights I had been sleeping very restlessly. If I slept at all. Even in my dreams I was thinking, worrying, but not about the usual – my mother. A different face haunted me, different questions kept coming up in my head. Bella. Always Bella. Where was she? Why hadn't she called me back? Why didn't she answer her phone? Minutes before my alarm would go off, I'd finally fall asleep, which of course made getting up even harder.

I slipped into the lecture room at the last moment. My regular seat had been taken, and I didn't want to disturb the professor by scurrying past other students, so I sank down in the first available seat. I wished I had bothered to check. Victoria was in this class too. What a wonderful way of making this dreadful day even worse. As if she'd been expecting me – who knows, maybe she had – she was wearing something that was bound to attract attention. When she noticed me accidentally sitting next to her, she flipped her long red curls over her shoulder and batted her eyes, in what I assume was supposed to be a seductive way, while leaning over, providing me with a view of her ample cleavage, conveniently on display.

'Hey hot stuff', she breathed while sliding her hand over my leg.

I yawned, both because I was tired _and_ bored. This was so predictable. What had I ever seen in this girl?

_An easy conquest._

Right. And that's all she ever was. Unfortunately, she was a little too persistent for my liking. Admittedly, the sex had been... interesting, but other than that, she was shallow and meaningless.

Before she could continue her ridiculous performance, I tried to stop her.

'I'm not in the mood for this, Victoria', I whispered, hoping I sounded as aggravated as I was.

But she wouldn't give up that easily.

'I missed you at the party last Friday', she went on.

'Well, I'm not feeling very festive', I quipped, without looking up from the notes I was taking from the PowerPoint on the screen.

I had been avoiding her that night. I had been avoiding everyone. Even Emmett and Jasper. I had locked myself in my room.

'Oh, I'm sure I can help you with that', she cooed, her hand moving up.

She didn't even elicit a physical reaction other than disgust. I pushed her hand away.

'No, thanks.'

'Aw, come on, baby, we used to have fun together', she pouted.

Seriously? How pathetic. Was she _that_ delusional?

'Fuck off, Victoria! Leave me alone!', I growled.

I was trying very hard to keep my voice at a whisper. She kept pouting at me. Apparently she thought it made her look cute. Fine, if that was how it was going to be... I gathered my things and left the lecture hall as quietly as I had entered.

I decided to at least do something constructive with my time and occupied a booth in one of the on-campus coffee shops. There was still some reading to be done. Within two pages Jasper had texted me.

_Where did you run off to__? – J_

_Crappy day__. Victoria made it worse - E_

_Got it_. _I would've run off screaming__ – J_

I asked to copy his notes for the rest of the lecture and tried to concentrate on my book for the remainder of the class. My other classes were a lot more boring, luckily, and by the time I went home my annoyance had been replaced by boredom. Which didn't last very long.

When I opened the front door I heard voices coming from the living room. My sister and Bella, busy doing their homework.

Bella was here! My first thought was rushing over to her, take her in my arms and never let her go again.

_Wow... maybe a tad bit overdoing it. Or have you forgotten all about her last phonecall?_

That thought stopped me in my tracks. How was I to know if she even wanted to see me? She was here with Alice. Why weren't they in Alice's room? Or at school, at Bella's home, in the park? Anywhere but here? I didn't want to see her. Not if I couldn't be with her. I tried to make my way up to my room as quickly and quietly as possible, but Alice's sharp senses had picked up on my presence.

'Hey, Edward, what's up?'

I nodded quickly and continued on my way, desperately trying to avoid Bella's gaze. No need to torture myself even more. I walked passed a large framed picture and caught their reflection in the glass. They exchanged a look and Alice shrugged. There wasn't much else she could do. I closed my door, turned up my stereo and tried to study.

_Like that's going to happen._

Don't remind me. Even the brief glimpse I had caught of her, the muffled conversation, even just these little things were enough to thoroughy distract me. So this was what Emmett had been afraid of. Me being too much of a distraction and a bad influence. Me hurting her. Who would've thought the situation could be reversed.

My mind wandered back to Wednesday. When I picked her up from school she'd practically jumped me in the parking lot. I didn't mind, even though her behavior had been triggered by silly high school gossip. If she didn't have it in her, she wouldn't have acted the way she did. Don't get me wrong, I liked quiet and shy Bella, that's what I'd fallen for. But this bolder, more agressive version of her was a complete turn-on! Of course, she was embarrassed when I called her out on it, and that adorable blush made another appearance.

Then later, hanging out in her room, supposedly doing homework, but in reality making out on her bed. At first it had been a little awkward. She was obviously new at this, as I'd also gathered from Emmett, and here I was, sitting on her bed, while her mother was downstairs. But then she took charge again, moving over me, kissing me. I flipped her over and hovered over her, her legs wrapping around me. I started caressing her, trying very hard to control myself, but thankful once again for the school uniform. I let one of my hands slide up her leg, under her skirt, to her butt and, when she didn't move to stop me, gave it a gentle squeeze. My other hand traveled along her leg, then up her torso. I stopped just shy of her breast, wanting to touch her so badly, but not sure if she'd like it.

_What are you talking about, Eddie? If she didn't like it, she'd have stopped you by now._

Still, I didn't want to push her. So when Bella arched off the bed, effectively pushing herself into my waiting had, I couldn't hold back the moan that escaped me. My erection was straining against the fabric of my jeans and the feel of Bella writhing underneath me, our tongues intertwining, only added to my arousal. Suddenly she'd gasped and I'd started worrying if I'd done something wrong. She finally hinted at having felt how she affected me and the only way I could answer was to simply confess that I was pretty much ready to go whenever she was in my presence or even just in my mind.

_Her_ hands had traveled down and slipped underneath my shirt, which got me even more excited. Her soft fingers carefully exploring my body... even thinking about it now caused an increase in my heartrate, despite my somber mood. Bella's hands had moved further up under my shirt and I decided to just take it off for her. I caught her staring at me and we teased each other a bit. At one point she sat up, offering me a view of her underwear. Dark blue cotton boyshorts. So sexy. She blushed when she realized but immediately took charge again and continued her explorations, leading her to discover my tattoo. She surprised me yet again in this. Usually, people would either like or hate it, without bothering to ask about meaning or motivation. Bella, however, had wanted to know why and when I got it. She was a bit taken aback to find out Emmett had one too, but didn't make a fuss and just went back to appreciating mine.

The entire time spent with her, it had been a challenge reigning myself in, because all I wanted to do was rip off her clothes. She was so incredibly hot! But I didn't want to rush things, didn't want to pressure her to do something she wasn't ready for.

_How do you know whether she's ready?_

Well, I didn't know, but I was intent on letting her take the lead in this. Yes, I wanted her, badly, but it was going to be on her terms, not mine. Just being with her, holding her, kissing her, that was enough for now.

At least, that's what I'd thought. I'd barely gotten home when she called me. And then it was over, just like that.

'I'm sorry, Edward,' she'd said, 'I can't see you anymore. You're not good for me.'

I knew I wasn't good enough for her. Emmett and my inner voice had told me so on several occasions. But I wanted to at least get the chance to prove them both wrong. Guess that chance up and left. She didn't even give me time to respond, to ask her what brought this on, why she changed her mind all of a sudden. She just hung up on me. I'd stood there, phone in hand, staring at it, for a good ten minutes. I was pulled out of my stupor by Esme, shaking my arm.

'Edward? Dinner's ready. Are you alright? You look a little pale...'

Finally I found my voice. Or at least a whisper.

'Bella...'

'Oh no, did something happen to her? She's such a sweet girl.

'She broke up with me...'

'Oh honey, I'm so sorry. Is there anything I can do?'

I shook my head and went up to my room.

'Do you want me to bring you some food?'

'No, thanks, I'm not hungry.'

I flopped down on my bed and just stared at the ceiling. What had happened? And why did it hurt so damn much? It hadn't even been that long. Just a few days. A couple of days of being with her and thinking of her when I wasn't. Five amazing days.

After that followed five days of misery. Alice got home from her first official date with Jasper and she was extatic. I hadn't even _had_ a first official date with Bella. It hurt.

The next day, Jasper's retelling of their date had started to annoy me. Especially after having received a play-by-play by Alice the night before.

'Who are you, you lovestruck fool, and what have you done with my laidback best friend?', I'd grumbled at some point.

'Sorry, E, I can't really help it. I just really like your sister', he'd started to apologize.

'No, Jazz, _I'm_ sorry. I'm just in a bad mood. I'm happy for you, really.'

'What's wrong?'

'Bella dumped me.'

'Damn. Sorry, dude. I wasn't expecting that.'

'Yeah, well, that makes two of us.'

'Are you okay?'

'Of course not! But I don't want to talk about it right now.'

He didn't bring it up again, but he obviously told Alice, who must've also talked to Bella, because later that day I got a very sympathetic text message and she said she'd go over to Bella's house. I felt relieved at being able to avoid her for now. I wasn't sure how I'd react upon seeing her, so soon after her phonecall, and I didn't want to find out just yet.

By Friday, Emmett and Rosalie had heard too. They offered to talk to Bella, maybe they could get her to explain her reasons. I didn't really want to know, anyway. Well, I did want to know, but I was worried I wouldn't like what I'd hear.

Later, they called me asking if I wanted to go to a party hosted by Bree and Jane's sorority.

_Excellent! Get drunk and fuck some random girl. That ought to take your mind off things. Maybe Victoria will be there. She's always at these parties and she's always available and easy._

Partying was the last thing on my mind. And random sex was even lower on the list.

I shut off my phone when Jasper joined in on asking me to come.

I locked myself in my room, stereo blaring, when they showed up.

When I saw Rosalie's BMW drive off, I made my way downstairs and watched a few dvds while reacquainting myself with my old friend Jack Daniels.

The rest of the weekend I successfully avoided everyone, partly due to my hangover that lasted well into Saturday, party by locking myself in my room, drowning in self-pity, the kind of which I usually reserved for early January, and trying to study. Then, Monday rolled around and I was still miserable. Even more so when I'd come home to find Bella in my livingroom.

I was still in deep thought when a noise at the door startled me and I realized I wasn't alone.

'What?', I snapped.

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**A/N So there you have it, my final update before a 4-week hiatus. But rest asured, I'm taking a notepad with me and I intend on writing lots and lots while I'm on the road. Let me know what you think of these last few chapters and my story so far!**

**I'm also curious to hear how you've come across my story... Tell me!**


	22. Blowout

**A/N I'm back from my trip and it was amazing! I didn't get a wristband for the red carpet in LA, because I refuse to camp out for 4 days when I'm only in town for a week and have other things to do as well, but I did go to see the premiere. I actually got a pretty good spot where I had a good view. Got a few pics that I put on my Facebook. Unfortunately, my camera decided to die just seconds before Robert and Taylor showed up – FML. But I did see them and Robert look positively delicious! Then the next day, I was walking in Venice Beach. A car drove by and I recognized the guys in it as Tyson Houseman and Kiowa Gordon. So that's cool, too.**

**Went to see the movie twice already while I was in New York (will go again next week with a friend who hasn't seen it yet). The second time was because of a Twitter-update alerting me to the presence of a cast member that night. Turned out to be Xavier Samuel, dropping by to say hi to us. So much fun!**

**Anyway, during my trip I kept a notepad with me and I continued writing. The first chapter of that is below, the rest will follow shortly. There will be some lemony goodness coming up. I wrote about 2 ½ chapters, which I hope you'll like and will clear some stuff up for you. Let me know what you think!**

**Disclaimer: although Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and the canon characters, this storyline and any additional characters are mine entirely. Please do not copy.**

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22. Blowout

'What?', Edward snapped.

He looked so angry. I cringed.

Alice pushed me into his room, 'Bella has something she needs to tell you', and shut the door behind me.

I shifted nervously under Edward's glare.

He then sighed, 'Fine. Spill', before turning to look out his window, arms crossed.

_He can't even look at me!_

I took a deep breath, thinking of how to start.

'This is ridiculous!', Alice had exclaimed, 'He's angry, you're upset, and you both don't want or need to be.'

'I don't know how to fix this, Alice. He obviously doesn't want to see me. He's been avoiding me...'

'B, he's been avoiding everyone! He's just as miserable as you are, trust me. Just go talk to him.'

The last five days had been horrible and made me realize just exactly how fast and hard I'd fallen for Edward. Charlie had confiscated my cellphone and laptop, forcing me to use the desktop in his study, supervised. There was no way of contacting Edward and no way of accidentally running into him or sneaking off to see him, because I had also been grounded until Monday. And for an absolutely ridiculous reason.

After Edward had left and I had managed to tone down my goofy grin to a somewhat normal smile, Charlie had called me back to the living room.

'This Edward, is he your boyfriend?'

There was something in the way he looked when he asked this, and in his tone of voice, that warned me to better me nice and docile.

'Yes, daddy.'

'And you met him when you were with Emmett?'

'Yes.'

He frowned.

'Emmett is looking out for me, Dad.'

'Obviously not good enough, because if he was, this wouldn't have happened.'

I looked at him, confused.

'You are not to see that boy again, Isabella.'

Excuse me?

'He's too old for you.'

'He's Emmett's age.'

'Exactly. And you're seventeen. He's too old. And he's going against his father's wishes.'

_Talk about old-fashioned._

I knew Carlisle supported Edward's chosen career. Of course he'd have liked it if he'd decided to attend medical school and follow in his footsteps – what father wouldn't? – but he respected his children's free will in the matter.

'Law school isn't good enough?'

'Not when his father is a doctor and he could be one too. And the boy looks a mess. You can do much better than that. You are calling him now and ending it.'

'But, Dad...', I started.

'You won't argue with me on this, Isabella,' Charlie said in an eerily calm tone of voice, 'You are _my_ underaged daughter and you'll do as I say. I won't have it.'

'But, Dad, I _like_ Edward. And he likes me. He treats me well and...'

'That's all irrelevant. I won't have it.'

I couldn't believe this. Had he not met Edward? Had he not seen how polite and responsible he was? What was not to like? Yes, he was a little older than me, but what was wrong with that? It wasn't like he was _Charlie's age._ If he'd just try to get to know him... And the other reasons were plain nonsense. What did it matter that he looked a little scruffy? I felt myself getting angry at Charlie's reasoning. Unfortunately, I had a tendency to start acting a little childish when I was angry, especially when I was faced with injustice. I'd demonstrated that earlier when I'd stuck my tongue out at the cheerleaders. Charlie usually didn't respond well to that, not even on a good day. Today was not a good day, so I could've anticipated what happened next. That didn't stop me, however, from crossing my arms and glaring at him defiantly.

'You can't make me.'

'You bet I can, young lady. You are calling him right this minute.'

'No. I won't.'

'Isabella', he warned.

I hated that he'd always call me by my full name. I preferred _Bella._

'There's no point in arguing with me.'

By then, angry tears had formed and added to my childish appearance. I wasn't giving up, though.

'You don't want me to date Edward, or you don't want me to date, period?'

'I'd rather you didn't date until college, but if you must date now, it should be with someone more suitable and more your age.'

'Yes, because any horny teenager is much better than a _doctor's son_ who's going to be a _lawyer_ and who _respects_ me. Edward hasn't tried to take advantage of me, Dad, unlike some of the more appropriate boys you've introduced me to in London, who couldn't keep their hands to themselves the moment you turned your back. I had to tell them off myself. And here I've got Emmett, who's watching every move Edward makes, he's so protective. But he doesn't even need to, because Edward treats me with more respect than even you could dream of, without someone telling him to. You're being ridiculous with this!'

I felt pretty good about my rant, having made a good point. Charlie wasn't deterred, though.

'I don't care about that. Emmett shouldn't even have allowed that boy near you in the first place. He'll get a piece of my mind about that. As far as those other boys are concerned, you should've come to me. Still, you are calling that boy now and telling him it's over.'

I couldn't believe this. How could Charlie persist like this? And where was Renee? Was she even aware of what he was doing? I felt like this argument had been going on for hours, but it probably had been mere minutes and she'd just stepped out to finish dinner. Or whatever. I didn't really care about that. All that mattered to me in those minutes was how narrowminded Charlie was being and how it seemed inevitable that I was going to obey him. Still, I wasn't going down without putting up a fight, so I crossed my arms and literally put my foot down. This seemed to piss Charlie off ever more, because he grabbed my arm and shoved the phone in my hands.

'Call him. Now. End of discussion.'

His grip on my arm was tight enough to make me wince, but he didn't notice. Tears started to spill over and I didn't even bother wiping them away. My hands were shaking when I dialled Edward's number.

'I'm sorry, Edward, I can't see you anymore. You're not good for me.'

'What do you mean? Baby, I...'

But I couldn't listen to his questions and pleading. There wasn't anything else I could say. Not with Charlie standing right next to me. So I hung up on him.

'Satisfied?', I said, tossing the phone onto the couch and yanking my arm free from his grip.

'How stupid do you think I am, Isabella? You have a cellphone and a laptop. I won't let you contact that boy behind my back. Hand them over.'

'What? You can't do that! How am I going to do my homework?'

'Use the computer in my study. You won't be going anywhere that requires a cellphone, anyway. You're grounded till Monday.'

'You suck!'

Immature, I know.

'I'm only doing what's best for you, Isabella.'

Except that he wasn't. Charlie only ever looked out for himself, his job and his reputation. As long as I didn't jeopardize those, he couldn't care less about my well-being.

I stomped off to my room and slammed the door.

Immediately, I heard my phone buzz from my bag. It was Edward, of course.

_WTF, B? What happened? – E_

I wanted so badly to call him right that second and explain everything, hear his voice and make sure we were alright. But I knew Charlie would be up there any minute to take away my phone and laptop. So I sent him a quick text, hoping he would be okay.

_Can't talk right now. Will explain asap. So sorry – B_

I hit _send_ just when Charlie barged in. I quickly turned my phone off. Charlie wasn't going to be able to access it and read all my texts.

'This is only for the best, Isabella, you just don't understand yet.'

'Shut up! I don't want to hear it. You've ruined everything! Just take it and leave me alone!'

Yup, the seventeen-year-old me was definitely present and letting herself be heard. I might as well go with that, I decided, and flopped down on my bed.

The bed I had been making out with Edward on just a few hours before. I was still messy. I clutched the pillow he'd been laying on and let the tears flow. This was so unfair.

A while later Renee came to check on me. She'd realized something was off when I didn't show up for dinner and Charlie had informed her that he'd 'taken care of the situation'. She said she had no idea he was going to react that way and she was going to try and reason with him.

'Don't bother, Mom, he's a stubborn idiot. He'll only get mad at you.'

She conceded in waiting until the next day. I was glad she agreed with me that he was wrong. So what that Edward was a little older? Renee was smitten with him. She did think, however, that Charlie only did what he thought was best for me. I wasn't buying it.

'Do you want something to eat, honey?'

'No, thanks. I lost my appetite.'

So, I was grounded until Monday. That meant that my plans for the weekend – decorating my room with Alice and Rosalie and hanging out with Edward – were off. I was looking at a boring weekend.

There were some distractions, though. Like Thursday. Alice and Jasper's date went so well, Alice was even more excited than usual. She talked a mile a minute about what they were wearing, where he took her, what he'd said, and sighed when she got to the part where he'd kissed her goodnight. I nodded, mmm'd and ah'd at all the right places, and had to admit listening to her took my mind off the night before a little. So it took Alice some time to realize something wasn't quite right with me.

When she met me outside Maths before lunch she looked concerned.

'Everything okay, Pix?', I asked.

I'd taken to using Edward's nickname for her. She didn't seem to mind, even though she'd shoot daggers at him whenever he used it. Maybe it was a sibling thing.

'I don't know. I'm still on my Jasper-induced high, but I have this feeling that something's very wrong and you look like you're part of it.'

_Gee, thanks. It's always nice to have your best friend tell you that you look like shit._

'I don't want to talk about it right now. Oh, Saturday's off, by the way. I'm grounded.'

'What? Why?'

'Charlie went all crazy last night. I should be able to come over again on Monday.'

'That sucks! I got all excited about doing your room and hanging out with Rose... Well, better do it next week, then.'

While we were standing in the lunch line, she got a text.

'What?', she shrieked, making me jump and almost drop my tray.

The entire lunch line turned to see what was going on. Alice's eyes went over the text a couple of times before she looked at me. She then grabbed my arm.

'You. Outside. Now!'

She pulled me out of the line, leaving both our trays behind. She dragged me outside, all the way to the back of the Gym building.

'Alice, you're kind of freaking me out here.'

'Did you break up with my brother?', she accused, hands on her hips, staring me down.

I completely understood why Edward said he was at times scared of his tiny sister; she looked absolutely menacing.

She tapped her foot impatiently.

'Well? Did you?'

'I had to,' I mumbled, 'but I don't want to talk about it. Not here.'

'Well, you'd better explain yourself, B. Jazz just texted me, saying he's a mess.'

I felt an aching in my chest at her words. I knew I had hurt him, but to hear it confirmed like this...

'Will you come over after school, Ali? I'll explain everything then.'

She conceded and we made our way back inside.

Having completely lost my appetite, I just sat down at our table and tried to partake in the conversation.

On our way to Chemistry, Alice's phone buzzed with a text from Emmett to me.

_Charlie ordered me__ & Rose over for dinner. Said it had to do w/ B. Something happen? – Em_

Great. Just what we both needed. We were probably in for another lecture, maybe even new rules regarding the time I spent at their place.

_He hated Edward. Blames u partly for it. Fucked up. Took my phone. I'm sorry – B_

_U kidding me? I'll call u before we come over. Good luck – Em_

After school, Alice and I drove home in silence, which had never happened before. As usual, Renee was waiting for me with tea.

'Hi, sweetie, how are you? Oh, hey, Alice. I didn't know you were coming over.'

'Mom, I know I'm grounded, but is it okay if Alice comes here? We always study together.'

'Sure, that's fine. But have some tea first.'

A few cups later we took off to my room. Alice sat crosslegged on the middle of my bed and motioned for me to join her.

'Spill.'

So I spilled. I told her what had happened the night before and how I tried to reason with Charlie but he wouldn't listen.

'That's crazy! Those are lame reasons. Let me talk to him. I'll make him see that my brother...'

Then it dawned on me that Charlie was thusfar unaware of the fact that Edward was Alice's brother. Or Emmett's best friend.

'No, no, don't. If he finds out you're his sister, I might not be allowed to come over anymore.'

Alice eyes widened and she started to smile.

'Cheeky girl! I'll talk to Edward, though.'

Suddenly, the outlook of the situation improved slightly. I texted Emmett to warn him.

_Charlie doesn't know Edward's ur friend. Keep it that way for now. I wanna be able to come over – B_

He replied with a wink.

Alice left before Charlie got home, promising to talk to Edward. Emmett and I, but mostly Emmett, received a lecture about his responsibilities when I was over there. Long story short: no college guy was supposed to even look at me and Emmett had to make sure of that. When they left, Rosalie and Emmett promised to help us, even though Emmett still acted very protective. I didn't really mind _his_ protectiveness, though, because he meant well. Charlie was only being selfish and arrogant.

Friday was a bit of a disappointment. Both Alice and Emmett had been unsuccessful in trying to talk to Edward. Apparently, he'd locked himself in his room.

I still didn't have access to any form of communication and by the time it was Saturday afternoon, I was bored out of my mind. I resorted to working ahead for school, which would leave me pretty much free of homework until December.

Sunday night at dinner, Charlie laid out his new rules for me. I would get my cellphone and laptop back Monday night. I was allowed to hang out with my friends from school, but I would be home for dinner, unless there was a special occasion. I could have sleepovers at Alice's once or twice a month, and I could spend every other weekend at Emmett's. I happily agreed to these rules, which pleased Charlie. He obviously thought it would keep me away from Edward.

But then Monday rolled around and Alice still hadn't been able to talk to him.

'We'll sit in the living room today,' she said when we got to her house, 'that way he can't physically avoid you when he comes home.'

No such luck. When Edward walked in he hurried to his room without so much as looking at me. If he'd shot me and angry look, even, that would have been fine, because at least he would have acknowledged me then. Alice let out an exasperated sigh and pulled me up the stairs with her, to his room.

I told him the entire story, and all the while Edward kept his gaze fixed on a tree in the backyard.

'Please, Edward, you have to believe me. Do you honestly think I'd be that cruel, doing something like that over the phone? I didn't want to do it. But I had to. Charlie was right there, listening to every word. I didn't want to break up with you. We haven't even had an official first date yet.'

By this point, tears were streaming down my face. I didn't care. All I wanted was for him to understand.

Slowly, Edward turned around in his chair. His expression was blank, his voice soft and low.

'Do you really mean that?'


	23. I'm an idiot

**A/N This chapter is a little shorter, but I hope you'll still like it.**

**Disclaimer: although Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and the canon characters, this storyline and any additional characters are mine entirely. Please do not copy.**

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23. I'm an idiot

I couldn't believe Alice was doing this to me. She should know better. Yes, Bella was her best friend, but I was her _brother._ And said best friend had ripped my heart out and stomped on it.

_A little overdramatic, are we?_

Maybe. But it just wasn't fair. Not only was Bella in _my house_, but now Alice had forced her into my room. I was so angry. But at the same time I felt the already familiar pull towards Bella. I was confused, couldn't determine what it was exactly that I was feeling.

Hurt. Anger. That much was obvious. But angry at whom? At Alice? No, I was annoyed with her for interfering, but that was Alice. She meant well and probably had some insight I was lacking.

I was angry at Bella. For dumping me over the damn phone! Who does that? I'd done a lot of shitty things to girls over the years, but I'd never been that cruel. I hoped.

I was angry at her for subsequently ignoring me. I'd sent her numerous texts all of Wednesday night and Thursday morning, yet she never answered.

And I was angry at myself. For allowing her to hurt me like that. I had been weak and let a girl gain so much control over me, in such a short time.

I was angry at myself for still wanting her, for still reacting to her.

So when Alice announced that Bella had something to tell me, I responded in a very immature way. I turned away from her and stubbornly glared out my window. I couldn't look at her. Because one look at her would be my undoing.

But then her words registered.

Charlie had apparently decided he hated my guts and I wasn't good enough for his daughter.

_Who the hell does he think he is?_

Uhm... her father?

_He doesn't even know you. How can he decide you're wrong for her?_

Bella had stood up to him, though. Pride filled me. She had defended me and our relationship.

But he had still forced her to make that call. And then he'd grounded her? That explained a lot.

Then I started to get angry at myself again, for locking myself in my room and avoiding everyone. They had all been trying to talk to me, to fill me in. What a mess!

As she continued her monologue, Bella had started to cry. What an idiot I was! To think she'd actually do such a thing. She was such a sweet girl and this situation had hurt her as much as it had hurt me.

'I didn't want to break up with you', she said.

Slowly, I turned around in my chair, trying to control my emotions. I didn't want Bella to think I was angry with her. Because I wasn't anymore.

Her face was tearstreaked and she looked tired, skinnier.

'Do you really mean that?', I asked carefully.

She nodded.

That was all I needed.

I jumped up from my chair, quickly strode over to her, cupped her face in my hands and pressed my lips to hers. She gasped in surprise, but almost immediately relaxed in my arms and kissed me back. She clutched my shirt and I pulled her in tighter, needing to feel her as close to me as possible.

After a couple of minutes she pulled back a little.

'I'm sorry, Edward,' she whispered against my lips, still crying, 'I'm so, so, so sorry.'

'Shhh...,' I said as I kissed her tears away, 'It wasn't your fault, love. And I've been acting like an idiot too.'

She shook her head vigourously, trying to take the blame for the situation entirely upon herself. I stilled her head, which was still in my hands, and locked eyes with her.

'I'm just so glad I've got you back, B.'

That night Bella got her cellphone back. She texted me just when I was about to go to bed.

_Just got all of ur messages. Again: so sorry – B_

_Glad u turned it off. Don't want Charlie reading up on us – E_

_He won't know I'm seeing u – B_

_R u sure u're ok w/ that? – E_

_Don't like to lie but he gives me no other choice – B_

_If u're sure... – E_

_U're worth it – B_

_:D – E_

_Btw I'm picking u & Pix up from school tomorrow – E_

_I'll keep that in mind :p Going to sleep now – B_

_Sweet dreams, sweet girl – E_

We spent the rest of the week working out different ways of seeing each other while keeping with Charlie's rules as much as possible. In theory his rules weren't that irrational, except that they were designed to keep me away from my girlfriend. The good thing was that she was still allowed to hang out with Alice and Emmett, and since we both spent a lot of time with them, that worked out perfectly. Our little group actually bonded even more now.

It was a little weird, though, at first, that Emmett, Jasper and I were dating each other's sisters. Not to mention that those sisters had decided to become each other's best friends, too. Like, I wasn't sure how much Emmett would want to know about Bella and me. But then again, I could pretty much take my feelings about Jasper and Alice as a guideline and add a little apprehension because of my history. And of course the protectiveness that comes with being a big brother that we all shared. For the girls it was probably pretty much the same: dating each other's brothers, maybe finding out details they'd never thought they'd learn about them. Like when Bella found out about our tattoo. I didn't think Emmett had kept it from her intentionally; more likely it hadn't come up yet or he wanted to show her instead of telling her on the phone. Another thing was that we all knew Rosalie and Emmett were very physical in their relationship. Of course we talked about stuff like that, but in time Emmett had learned when to stop as to not make Jasper uncomfortable. And for now only Emmett and Rosalie were having sex. I wondered what would happen once the other couples started as well.

_Let's see... Freak outs, yelling, awkwardness... Have I left anything out?_

Sure, it might be a little awkward at first, but come on, we're each other's best friends!

The only real problem that arose because of the new rules was that Bella and I still hadn't had our first date yet. Originally I had wanted... honestly? I had no idea. New territory, remember?

_Come on, you must have had _some _idea._

Maybe. I was thinking along the lines of...

_Dinner and a movie? Very original. And cue eyeroll._

No! That's just lame.

I had been wanting to show her the city, since she'd just moved here. I wanted her to think of me when she went certain places or did certain things, because I had taken her there the first time. But I had not yet made a decision as to where to go and what to do. But that was no longer an option. At least not with just the two of us. Or I'd have to ask Bella to lie even more to her parents, and I couldn't expect that of her. So I had to come up with something else. Which would have to include at least Emmett or Alice. And I wanted to have to date preferably the next weekend.

I wanted Bella and I to be more than just two people sneaking off to make out on a regular basis. I wanted to take her out, be in public with her, _be_ with her.

I'd never dated before. I'd had hook-ups. Sometimes, when I was still in high school, I would hang out with one of those girls, but always as a group thing. In college... never. This was all new to me and I didn't really know how to act or what to do. And now the situation had become slightly more complicated. I was at a loss. So I did what any selfrespecting guy would do: I asked my best friends what to do.

'You don't really have much of a choice, lil' E', Jasper'd said, 'You'll either hang out at home or make it a double date.'

'I know, but how special is that? I want it to be a _real_ first date.'

'Sorry, dude, I don't see it happening. Just ask B if she's okay with a group date. I'm sure we can work something out so it can be more of a date.'

Bella indeed was okay with it.

'Face it, Edward, until Charlie can be reasoned with, we'll have to be a little creative to spend time together.'

_Are you sure you're twenty-one? This seventeen-year-old is way more mature than your whining ass._

Fine. I would listen to my inner voice, my friends and my girlfriend and enjoy whatever we were able to enjoy together.

'This weekend it is, then.'

We decided to ask Emmett and Rosalie to join us too, so we had the entire group together. Alice couldn't be happier, because this gave her an excuse to shop and at the same time bond with Rosalie. So while the girls were busy shopping and pampering that Wednesday afternoon, the guys and I tried to come up with some ideas for our date.

'So you want to go on a date with my sister and you want us to go with you?', Emmett laughed.

'Dude. Shut up. You promised you'd help', Jasper said, 'Remember how I never gave you a hard time about Rose?'

'Em, please,' I said, 'I'm trying to do the right thing here. I wanna take her on a real date, but because of your father I can't do that without your help.'

'Relax, Eddie, I was just having a laugh at ya. You've gotta admit it's kinda funny that you, _Sexward_, need help getting a date, don't you?'

_Great. I was never going to live this down._

Eventually, we came up with a plan we could all agree on.

Bella must have kept the fact that I was Alice's brother from her parents, because she was still allowed to come over and, even better, spend the occasional weekend. The first weekend she stayed after having been grounded was the weekend of our first date. I decided to make it as special for her as I could.

I didn't see her much on Friday, because after school Alice, Bella, Angela and Jessica disappeared into Alice's room, claimin they were in desperate need of _girl time_. I managed to steal a quick kiss before heading over to Jasper's.

Saturday morning I got up early to make breakfast. I wasn't a gourmet chef, but I knew how to scramble eggs, bake pancakes and cut fruit. I took a tray up to my room and put the rest of the food on the kitchen table. A very sleepy Alice opened the door to her room

'Edward? Is there something wrong?'

'Not at all. I made breakfast for you girls. It's in the kitchen.'

'Oh. Wow. That's so nice of you. I'll go wake them up.'

I waited outside the door, listening to their muffled squeals and hearing them shuffle around the room. After a few minutes, Jessica and Angela emerged. Suddenly I was glad I'd remembered to throw on some sweats this time.

'Goodmorning, Edward,' they both giggled, 'Thanks for breakfast.'

I flashed them a smile. The smile Bella had accused me of using when I wanted to _dazzle_ someone.

_Yes, might as well play it up a little._

True enough, both girls' step faltered and their jaws dropped.

_Very mature, messing with barely awake teenage girls' minds._

Wait, didn't they both have boyfriends? I turned away from them, anxious to see Bella. When she and Alice appeared, I quickly pulled her to my side.

'Our breakfast is in my room.'

Her eyes widened and she bit her bottom lip. Damn, those gorgeous lips. I wanted to kiss them so badly.

While the other girls made their way downstairs, I led Bella to my room. I had left the tray of food on my desk, letting her decide whether to sit on the couch or the bed. When I'd closed the door, I wrapped my arms around her waist, leaned down and placed a soft kiss on her shoulder.

'Goodmorning, love', I whispered.

Bella giggled and leaned into my embrace.

'Oh. You actually _did_ bring breakfast up here', she said.

'You thought I was lying?'

She shrugged, 'I don't know.'

I turned her around.

'Did you think I just wanted to get you alone, to make out or whatever?'

She bit her lip again.

'Maybe I wouldn't have minded.'

O. M. G.

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**A/N I'm so excited! I keep getting notifications that people are adding me and/or this story to their alert subscription. Which can only mean you like it! So thank you for that.**

**I have some faithful reviewers and I appreciate every single one of you. But I'd love to get some more reviews. So I'll make a deal with you: I'll update again once I've reached 110 reviews. Review reward is a teaser from the next chapter.**


	24. Build up to something

**A/N I know I said I wouldn't update until I got 110 reviews after the last chapter. But then I finished this chapter and I'm actually pretty happy with the way it turned out. So instead of waiting patiently for 3 more reviews, I decided to humor you, and myself, by just updating. A little warning, though, just in case: the rating is getting into effect in this chapter. Let's hope I did okay with it.**

**Disclaimer: although Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and the canon characters, this storyline and any additional characters are mine entirely. Please do not copy.**

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24. Build up to… something

Girl time was great! We had watched some movies and, more importantly, talked about boys. I hardly ever used to do this with my friends in London. Mostly because I wasn't all that interested in dating anyone I knew there. So having Leah and Kim gush about Paul and Jared and asking me what was going on with Jacob even though they knew we were just friends wasn't all that appealing. Back then, I preferred hanging out with the entire group, boys included.

But now, I really like spending time with just the girls. Even more so now that Edward and I were somewhat official, albeit below the radar, I wanted to make sure I devided my time between him and Alice as equally as possible. Angela and Jessica knew the basics of my situation and luckily they were supportive. Well, it wasn't as if they had even met Charlie yet, but just in case they were to run into him, they'd promised to cover for us.

In Jessica's case, support also consisted of a lot of sexual advice. At first I was a little apprehensive. I mean, we were talking about Alice's brother.

'Oh, come on, B! I don't mind, really. I'd rather hear it from you than some skank.'

'Are you sure?'

'Yes! You wouldn't believe me if I told you how many cold showers Edward's been taking lately. There's so much sexual tension between the two of you... Now dish!'

Jessica leaned in, focusing all her attention on what I was about to divulge. She may have been on again with Mike, that didn't mean she wasn't interested in drooling some more over my boyfriend. The fact might have disturbed me somewhat, where it not that I knew Jessica wasn't going to do anything. She was just very interested, sympathetic and trying to help.

_Keep telling yourself that. The girl just wants details to add to her spank-bank. About _your _boyfriend._

Whatever. As long as she kept her hands – and her fantasies – to herself, I would listen to her suggestions. We were going into unchartered territory, and she was the only one of us who had been there before.

And I actually felt a little relieved being able to talk about it. I had no idea what I was doing and Edward was much more experienced than I was...

Wait... cold showers? Combined with sexual tension?

'_B, this is pretty much a permanent fixture when I'm arou__nd you... or thinking of you...'_

Did this mean...? Wow. Edward really did get turned on by me!

_Very perceptive. You've felt the way he reacts to you!_

I know. But this little piece of information somehow made me feel giddy. Edward Cullen was so attracted to me that even his sister noticed. He needed cold showers!

Of course, my blush and giggles didn't go unnoticed, and the girls started prying for more details. I didn't tell them everything that had happened, but they were sqealing with delight nontheless.

'Edward's got a tattoo?', Alice exclaimed.

Oops. Apparently she didn't know yet.

'Uhm, yeah. Em and Jazz too...'

'What? I didn't know! What kind of tattoo?'

'A friendship symbol. They got it last summer.'

'Oh. I guess that's kind of... cool. But why didn't he tell me?'

'I don't know. I mean, Em didn't tell me either. I found out when I saw Edward's.'

'When he was halfnaked!', Jessica chimed in, practically drooling, 'Don't forget about that!'

'Thanks, Jess, for reminding me. I almost forgot that little tidbit', I said, voice dripping with sarcasm.

'To think of that glorious piece of man meat, inked up...'

_Yes. I _am_ thinking of it. He's delicious. And mine._

I was getting a little annoyed. I didn't mind Jessica wanting to discuss making out, ranging from the most general sense to more individual cases. But to have her uttering her fascination with _my_ boyfriend right in front of me... A quick change of subject was very much needed.

'So, Jess... What kind of _activities_ do you engage in with Mike to get him to follow you around like the little puppy that he is?', Alice asked her, sensing my growing aggravation.

She was so easily distracted. Which was a good thing, considering I really liked her, despite her sometimes wandering eye.

_Just stick to your own boyfriend and we'll all be fine._

Exactly.

'Well...', Jessica started, wiggling her eyebrows suggestively, 'there's this thing I like to do to him...'

What followed was a lengthy lecture about the art of fellatio and hand jobs. I tried to control my embarrassment, then realized the only one of us who wasn't fazed was Jessica herself so I started paying attention to what she was explaining.

_Some of the stuff she's saying might come in handy._

When Edward said he had our breakfast in his room, I honestly thought it was just an excuse to get me alone. After all, our date today was a group date with our siblings. The look on his face when I admitted that I wouldn't have minded was priceless. He swallowed hard.

'Edward, relax. Let's eat first. I can't believe you cooked for me!'

'It's not that big a deal. But I just want today to be special for you. And I wanted to spend some time alone with you.'

He blushed. Edward actually blushed!

'Uhm... so where do you want to sit?'

'Couch', I said decidedly.

His deskchair wasn't really comfortable enough for two people to sit on for longer than a few minutes. And although his bed looked very inviting, I didn't want to presume any more than I already had. Yes, my desire, my want for Edward was ever-growing, but I still needed to eat something and I didn't want his breakfast to go to waste. His bed would be too much of a distraction. For now.

But instead of sitting down next to him, I crawled onto his lap and snuggled close into his chest. His chest that was hidden from view by one of his UW t-shirts, I might add.

_You can always get rid of that, you know..._

And I intended on doing just that. After breakfast.

The food he had prepared was delicious. Or maybe it had something to do with the way I was eating it. Because instead of handing me a plate, Edward fed me small bites while trailing kisses up and down my neck and shoulder. It was exhilirating. And totally distracting.

When his hands joined in, I was done for. His left arm was wrapped around me, hand resting on my hip. About halfway through the first pancake he moved that hand up my spine, lingering for a moment at my collarbone, then pulled my hair back, exposing more of my neck. I tilted my head a little, granting him better access. Edward's lips easily found the sensitive spot where my neck met my shoulder, sending a shiver down my spine. I gasped when I felt his teeth graze the skin there.

It became increasingly difficult to keep my eyes openend and to focus on breakfast. To make it even more challenging, Edward also started breathing harder as I shifted a little in his lap, feeling his arousal. I gave up trying to focus, closed my eyes and let the sensations wash over me. His left hand was lightly drawing designs on my back while he kept kissing and nipping along my neck. He didn't actually bite, but somehow this anticipation, this teasing, was so enticing.

'Breathe, Bella', Edward whispered.

I exhaled shakily, not even realizing until now that I'd been holding my breath.

He continued his slow and exquisit torture to my senses by feeding me a bite of fruit, his fingers lingering on my lips just a little longer. He then dropped his hand to my left shoulder and slipped the strap of my dress down. The smooth fabric fell from my body easily, exposing me. I didn't have time to feel selfconscious about it, though, because in the same fluid motion, Edward's hand travelled down, tentatively stroking my now naked breast. My breaths were coming in pants by the time his thumb reached my nipple, hardening under his touch. The next sensation forced my eyes open in surprise. I looked down to find Edward leaning forward, cupping my breast in his hand, flicking my nipple with his tongue.

'Edward...', I breathed.

He looked up, a worried look in his eyes. Did he think he did something wrong? If he did, my expression must have convinced him otherwise, because he moved up to kiss me. This kiss was so much more intense than any of the kisses we'd shared before, even when we'd been making out on my bed. There was so much lust, so much desire in this kiss. I snaked my hands around his neck, pulling him closer.

I was vaguely aware of the tray with the rest of our breakfast falling to the ground as Edward moved me to lay back on the couch with him hovering over me. He moved his ministrations to my other breast, while his right hand traveled down to my leg, all the while continuing to kiss me. Breakfast was over and forgotten. And I couldn't care less. Because Edward was kissing me, touching me. Ever so slowly, he slid my nightgown up, pausing when he reached the seam of my boyshorts. Why was he stopping? I was leaning into his touches, desperate to feel more. I grumbled and he looked up at me through his lashes.

'Can I?', he asked hesitantly.

Why was he hesitating? Didn't he know by know that I wanted him?

_Apparently not. So let him know!_

I nodded and started tugging on his shirt.

'Off', I demanded.

He complied with a grin, that amazing crooked grin that had become so familiar to me and one of my favorite sights, exposing his perfect chest to me. Another favorite. I could look at him all day and not get bored. Especially the way he was looking right now. Eyes wide, hungry expression, mouth slightly agape, heavy breaths, half naked, hands roaming my own barely dressed body... I felt my cheeks flush and bit my lip. Edward's eyes immediately went to my mouth, licking his own lips before crashing back down on mine. The hand that was already working its way up my body underneath my skimpy dress softly stroked the planes of my abdomen, grazed the undersides of my breasts, then went back down to trace the top of my underwear.

_Oh my... he's going to touch me... there!_

Suddenly I was glad I had let Alice and Rosalie talk me into getting a wax when we were out shopping and 'getting pretty', as Rosalie had called it, last Wednesday. At the time I had deemed it completely unneccessary and premature, asking for only a facial and a mani-pedi, but they had insisted, claiming it was never too early to look after myself.

'You'll never know what might happen,' Rosalie had said, 'And even so, I always like the thought of being well-groomed, top to bottom.'

At that, Alice had started giggling and Rosalie shot her a disapproving look.

'But Rose, we haven't even done anything yet...', I'd started to protest.

'Relax, B, I'm not saying that you have or that you should, I'm just saying, if you know you've taken care of yourself, you'll feel more confident. And should anything happen, you won't be selfconscious about it. Believe me, that's the last thing you'll want. And if nothing happens for a while, at least you'll get used to the feeling and it won't be so bad the next time around.'

I just gave in and let the woman in the salon torture me, Rosalie and Alice holding my hands throughout the proces. Also, I _had_ been curious about what to do in that department, so I sort of appreciated them for making the decision for me. Still, throughout the painful proces I had silently cursed them for making me do this, and myself for being such a pushover. Now, with Edward's hand a mere inch away, I started to feel like I should thank them. Maybe later.

When his hand finally slipped into my panties and I felt his fingers caress me, I almost lost it then and there. I had felt my own fingers there on occasion, but usually just when I was in the shower, washing myself. I'd never really appreciated the possibilities before, and they had never really appealed to me. But to have Edward touch me there, even the barest hint of a caress, was absolutely exquisit. He had only stroked me there once, very lightly, but already I was left panting.

'Geez, Bella, you're so wet...'

His voice was barely more than a whisper, but he'd kept his eyes locked with mine and I could see the excitement and lust in them, as he could probably see in mine as well.

Then his fingers started to explore further. By the time he found my clit and started rubbing it, I was reduced to a quivering mess beneath his expert fingers. I could already feel the tension building. I clutched his shoulders, calling out his name.

'Damn...', he breathed as he gently slipped one finger inside me, then added another, 'you're so tight...'

Well, of course I was. I had never done anything even remotely close to this before. He was the first to ever touch me like this. The first to ever go further than a kiss. And I had only kissed Jacob on a rare drunk occasion, so in my book that didn't really count as a proper kiss.

_Now is not the time to think about Jacob. Or anyone else beside Edward and what he's doing__ right now. So shut up and enjoy it!_

I didn't really know what was happening – well, technically, I did know, I'd just never experienced it – but I instinctively knew that I loved Edward's touch and at the same time craved more. The force of the sensations had left me speechless and the only thing left for me to do was hold on to him and kiss him. One of my hands had made its way into his hair, playing with it at first, but fisting it as the pleasurable feelings grew.

I let out an almost embarrassing moan when he combined moving his fingers inside me with stroking my clit with his thumb, but by that time I was too aroused to care and he surely didn't seem to mind. In fact, I think the sounds coming from me actually encouraged him to continue. He kept on touching me and I could feel something building deep inside me. It started where he was touching me, moved to every nerve-ending in my body and back, and built to an almost uncomfortable level.

'Edward... so...good...'

He answered by locking his lips onto that sensitive spot on my neck and teasing my nipples with his free hand. The build-up was so amazing it was almost painful, and he just kept going... Was he trying to torture me? What an exquisite torture! I needed a release, soon. Please, don't stop. But too much... keep going... I didn't know how I was going to take much more. His touch felt too good.

'Oh... my... Edward... ugh... so... good...', I managed between pants.

Not losing the rhythm, he minutely changed the pressure with which his thumb was working me, along with the angle his fingers were moving inside me. They hit another sensitive spot I didn't know I had and the sensation made my back arch off the couch and my hips to move up towards him. What was this boy doing to me?

'Let go, baby', he murmured between kisses.

I couldn't hold on any longer and let myself succumb to his touch and his kisses. I convulsed around his fingers and practically screamed his name. Was this what it was supposed to feel like? Losing control, not knowing what was happening, even forgetting my own name? Because the only thing that existed in that moment was Edward. His body pressed to mine, his fingers deep inside me, as deep as they could go. His thumb touching me in the best way possible. His lips on my skin, his breath fanning out, his heartbeat echoing in my own body, his sweat mixing with my own...

He was everything.

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**A/N There you have it: my first lemon. I hope I did okay. Let me know what you think of it. Next chapter is the date.**

**So... I'm a little weird sometimes. I've been writing bits and pieces of this story for a while now, and I actually have some material that's coming up within a few chapters. But I haven't written the chapters in between yet. I do like the material, though, and don't want to keep it from you guys that long. So here's what I'll do:**

**The first 5 reviews for this chapter will get a teaser of what's to come.**

**If you're not one of the first 5 but your review totally rocked my world, I might make an exception and send you a teaser too. You know the magic word(s)! (If not: surprise me!)**


	25. Balls, skanks and Italian cuisine

**A/N I'm sorry it took me so long to update. I've had a pretty busy time at work, with long hours, less sleep, lots of partying and houseguests.**

**Disclaimer: although Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and the canon characters, this storyline and any additional characters are mine entirely. Please do not copy.**

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25. Balls, skanks and Italian cuisine

'Bella?'

Edward's soft voice slowly broke through my daze. I didn't know how long it had been. It could have been minutes, or mere seconds.

'Baby?', he asked again.

I blinked a couple of times and focused on his eyes, which were sparkling even greener than usual.

'Hey', I said as I smiled up at him.

'Hey.'

I couldn't read his expression. He looked a little restraint, worried even.

'What's wrong?'

'I was about to ask you the same thing.'

'How come?'

'You were real quiet for a while. I was starting to worry I'd done something wrong.'

Oh. He _was_ worried. But that was just silly. There was no need for him to be insecure about anything that had just happened.

'It's just... I never knew I could feel like this.'

He was deep in thought for a few minutes as he sat back up, pulled me onto his lap again and adjusted my dress.

'You mean... you've never...?'

I shook my head.

'Not even by yourself?'

I blushed.

'It's not really something I do.'

He was quiet.

'Is that a bad thing?'

'No. It's just... I don't know...'

Then his face broke into that crooked grin that I'd come to love.

'I guess I sort of like the idea of being the first, and hopefully the only one, to make you feel this way. You know?'

I didn't respond. Instead, I wrapped my arms around his neck and kissed him. It was all the answer he required. He hugged me close and deepened our kiss. My left hand explored the plains of his muscular torso, softly trailing down towards his chiseled abs. I could tell Edward was aroused; he was breathing harder, I felt his heartrate increase and his erection was poking my thigh. But when my fingers reached the top of his sweatpants, he grabbed my wrist.

'Bella...', he said and swallowed hard, 'No.'

'You don't want to...?'

'Believe me, I do.'

'Then why did you stop me?'

'Because I don't want you to do it just because I just... did... _that_... for you', he said and blushed a little.

It was kind of endearing seeing confident and sexy Edward flustered to speak the words.

'And secondly... I want right now to be about you.'

He cupped my face with his hands and gave me a tender kiss. I rested my head on his shoulder and sighed contentedly. Then I noticed the tray of food spilled over the carpet.

'Sorry about breakfast...', I started to apologize.

'Don't worry about it, love,' Edward interrupted me, 'Did you enjoy it, though?'

I looked up at him through my lashes, giving him a sly grin.

'Very', I said and bit my lip in a shy reflex.

It was all it took for him to attack me with a passionate kiss.

A loud banging on the door interrupted us.

'Bella!', Alice sang through the closed door, 'We need to start getting ready!'

Edward and I both groaned.

'I have to go', I said reluctantly and moved to get up.

Edward walked me to the door, unlocked and opened it and managed to quickly kiss me one last time before Alice pulled me outside and dragged me back to her room.

'Where are Ang and Jess?', I asked, glancing around.

Their bags were gone and the air matrasses had disappeared too.

'They left over an hour ago. We didn't want to interrupt you and Edward's... uhm... breakfast', Alice winked.

Oh no. Had they heard us? I had no idea how loud I had been.

'Chill, B, don't worry about it. And for the record: we didn't hear one bit. I turned up the stereo, just in case.'

Good. Talking about it was one thing, knowing someone is probably doing it, too, but having to face them after they might have actually heard it... that was a whole other thing and I wasn't sure I was ready for _that_ yet.

'But I take it you had fun?'

And my goofy, happy, lazy grin was back.

'That's great!', she practically squealed, 'You're positively glowing! I'm so happy for you!'

Alice proceeded to shove me into her bathroom, ordering me to shower while she picked out my outfit for our date.

I was glad the guys had told Alice it would be best if we were dressed somewhat comfortably, because this meant I was spared the danger of having to walk in heels. And it turned out Alice was rather clueless when it came to dressing down. I mean, she paired our school uniform with a petticoat, a designer handbag and at least three-inch heels. So this time I had been allowed to bring my own choice of clothes. Alice had insisted, though, that I brought a variety, so she could put together the perfect outfit for today. I had to admit I was curious why they had specifically told us to dress comfortably. I sure hoped we weren't going hiking or something along those lines. I was prone to accidents, as I had already demonstrated on numerous occasions. Surely Emmett knew and wouldn't subject me to that on purpose. At least not on my first date with Edward.

But something told me I didn't have to worry about that; Alice was wearing True Religion skinny jeans, a Chanel blazer over a white top, a cashmere pashmina scarf and Manolo Blahnik stiletto pumps. Luckily the outfit she'd chosen for me was a lot more low-key – loose-fitting charcoal plat pants, a purple tank, black ballet flats and the pink v-neck hoodie I'd bought on our first shopping trip.

While working on my hair and make up, Alice gushed about Jasper and how excited she was about tonight. Apparently, Jasper was still rather shy, even though it was obvious they had been crushing on each other for years.

'And it's like, I keep telling him to just relax and let go, but then he just... doesn't. I really like him, you know? And he's the sweetest! He's texting me all the time and like, just this week, he remembered I told him what kind of Starbucks coffee I like and he brought me a cup. It's all in the details, right? So he does these things that make me melt and I'm almost putty in his hands. You have no idea what I want his hands to do... But then, when we're alone, it stays so very PG-13, it's frustrating!'

'But Ali, it's only been two weeks. Give it some time.'

'No, see, that's the thing. It's only been two weeks for you and Edward, too. And you haven't known him your whole life. Oh shit!'

'What?'

'What if that's the problem? Jasper has known me my whole life. What if this is all we get? A couple of dates and some kisses, and then it gets awkward?'

She was getting so worked up over this and she didn't even know what the real reasons were. I needed to calm her down, especially since she was holding a curling iron close to my head.

'Alice, chill, okay? You don't know that. Don't compare your progress to mine, your situation is completely different from mine. And for what it's worth, I don't think this is all you'll get. I've seen the way you look at each other. He's crazy about you! Just talk to him, okay? Let him know how you feel.'

She closed her eyes, sighed and when she opened them gave me a smile in the mirror.

After having calmed down somewhat, Alice went back to work. With the amount of time she had alotted for a casual date, I began to fear any slightly more formal event. At least this time I got off easy. She merely curled the ends of my hair and pulled a little of the front back with a pink clip. Part of me was thinking I should pay more attention when Alice was working her magic on me, so I could also do it myself. But then another part argued, convincingly, to just let her be, because she enjoyed using me as Bella Barbie way too much. Plus, she came up with combinations I never would have considered. Like using purple eyeshadow as a soft eyeliner. I never would have thought of that, but the effect in combination with my brown eyes was remarkable.

'Are you sure this is okay for tonight?', I asked her hesitantly.

I liked that I was comfortable, but I didn't want to be underdressed. Compared to Alice, I felt like I was. But then again, Alice always dressed as if she had just gotten off a runway or was on her way to some high end party, so there wasn't really a way to tell for sure. She looked me up and down and instructed me to spin around, checking to see if anything was out of place or tucked the wrong way.

'B, you look adorable! Unless we end up at a black tie event, you're good to go.'

When we entered the parking lot of the bowling alley, Alice's face scrunched up.

'Bowling?', she asked skeptically.

'Come on, Pix, it'll be fun.'

'As in, I have to wear shoes previously worn by who knows how many people with smelly feet?'

She wrinkled her nose in disgust. Luckily, Edward had anticipated this reaction and had come prepared with desinfectant and a few pairs of socks for us. At least I got why they had instructed us to dress comfortably. Trying to bowl gracefully was a challenge in itself. Adding a dress to it would only make it more difficult. I wasn't so sure about the success of the activity, though. My hand-eye coordination was about as good as my balance; non-existant. Well, we'd get a few laughs out of it, to be sure.

Alice's scowl pretty much evaporated when she caught sight of Jasper getting out of Emmett's Jeep. Suddenly, she didn't seem to mind the scheduled activity. The girl was so predictable. I bet we could get her to do anything, so long as Jasper was involved.

I didn't really object to the provided shoes – I mean, I was wearing socks – but I was glad my flared pants obscured them from view, as they were, in fact, hideous.

We were booked for one lane and we decided to team up – boys versus girls. As bowling isn't so much a game of strength as it is of aim, it didn't really matter that the other team had Emmett and his bearlike musclepower. I think we were actually having the upperhand in that his strength was matched by his goofyness, almost rivalling my own clumsiness. For instance, where most of my balls landed in the gutter, Emmett managed to miss our lane more than he hit any of it, including the gutter. At one point he actually threw the ball backwards into our booth. We were barely able to jump aside or pull our feet up, or it would have knocked at least one of us over. He did manage to bowl a strike, though. Two lanes over. All in all, it was pretty hilarious. And as a result of my brother's antics and my lack of coordination, both teams were even throughout the game.

Another good thing about bowling was that we got to ogle our boyfriends' butts when it was their turn. Which wasn't a punishment. At all. Edward's tattered and torn jeans fit him perfectly and the strategically placed tears in the fabric showed just enough skin to be mesmerizing. To be fair, I caught them staring at us with slack jaws on more than one occasion, too.

Following Edward's retreating form when he went to get us another round of drinks, however, I also caught every single girl and woman undressing him with their eyes. Even the ones who were obviously there with a date. Or with their children. Seriously, the nerve of some women! Trying to get my attention – I had been so busy looking at Edward that I nearly missed my turn – Rosalie noticed my frown.

'Don't worry about it, sweetie, we get that all the time. I'd tell you to ignore it, but I know that's easier said than done. Just remember that he's here with you.'

I smiled a little at that.

'And for the record, he doesn't even look at them. Trust me, I've seen him before, and the way he behaves since he's met you... he's only got eyes for you.'

I couldn't help the smug grin that appeared at hearing that.

'Good. Now... it's your turn.'

As I was mentally preparing for my next try, Rosalie groaned.

'What is _she_ doing here?'

Judging by her tone, she must have seen someone she didn't like. Rosalie might come off as cold and intimidating, but I had come to know her as a very warm girl, once you'd earned her trust. She was also very honest and straightforward and didn't see much use in sugarcoating things.

Swinging back my arm for probably another gutterball I heard Alice comment, 'Yuck! And what is she _wearing_?'

My curiosity got the best of me and I turned around, my ball effectively landing in the gutter, following both their gazes towards a girl walking in. From afar she was rather pretty: tall, slim, proportioned... Perhaps a little tan for Washington, but maybe she just had good pigmentation. Upon closer examination I understood Alice's comment. Her outfit was rather... tacky. Leatherlook leggings and a white garment that was either a top or a dress. Regardless, it was short, tight and strapless. And... were those stripperheels? Like I said, tacky. Oh well, I figured, I didn't know her, so why waste my time. I returned my attention to the task at hand: trying to knock over some pins.

Of course, the girl in question went to occupy the only available lane, the one next to ours. I could tell Rosalie was getting aggravated, but didn't really understand why. What could be so bad about this girl to elicit such a reaction? Alice's reaction to her proximity was quite humorous. I could almost see her planning a thorough make over in her head.

'Isn't this a coincidence?', a shrill voice suddenly sounded from the now occupied booth next to us, 'Rosalie! What a surprise seeing you here! I never pictured you as the bowling type.'

Despite her obvious dislike for the girl, Rosalie managed a polite reply, after a not so subtle eyeroll at us.

'Same goes for you, Victoria.'

'Oh well, you know me,' Victoria giggled, 'I'm up for whatever.'

That answer was somehow funny to Rosalie, because she burst out laughing. Victoria was taken aback for a moment, but then composed herself.

'Anyway... So, you're here with your brother and Emmett? That's nice.'

She continued to babble on about the people she was with, before she noticed Alice and me.

'Oh, I'm sorry!'

Her tone indicated she wasn't.

'I haven't introduced myself to your little friends. How rude of me.'

_Rude indeed._

I took the opportunity to give her a once-over. She wasn't slim and proportioned, rather than skin, bones and fake boobs. She obviously wasn't wearing a bra and with the way her nipples – one pierced – were pointing towards the ceiling, I doubt she needed to. Her tan looked spray-on.

_Figures. No natural redhead can get _that_ tan without a little help. Unless those flaming red curls are fake too._

She extended a manicured hand – acrylic, of course – and smiled sweetly. I noticed a jeweled stud to the left of her lower lip, which was painted bright red.

_Ew._

'Hi, I'm Vicki, with an i.'

Right, her gold nameplate necklace said so too. Seriously, how many clichés could one person embody?

Alice shook Vicki/Victoria's hand.

'I'm Alice, Jasper's girlfriend. And this,' she motioned to me, 'is Bella, E...'

'Oh!', Vicki/Victoria exclaimed, 'You must be Emmett's little sister! I've heard _so much_ about you!'

Somehow I doubted that.

'That's so nice of him, letting you tag along... Wait! Aren't you Eddie's sister?'

Her eyes glanced around the bowling alley while she pushed her chest out even more.

'Is he here too?'

'As a matter of fact,' Rosalie answered, 'he is. We're here on a triple date of sorts.'

Vicki/Victoria looked between the three of us, apparently not quite understanding. Then, as I felt two arms slide around my waist, she let out another squeal.

'Hey, Eddie! What's up?'

'Hey, gorgeous,' Edward stage-whispered to me, ignoring the tacky girl whose connection to our group still eluded me, 'Are you having fun?'

I nodded as he placed a kiss below my ear.

'Victoria,' he clipped, 'I take it you met my girlfriend?'

'G-girlfriend?', she stuttered incredulously.

Then, without so much as a second glance at her, Edward turned us around, focusing our attention back on our game.

After the game had ended in a three-point victory by the boys, but only because most of my balls ended in the gutter and Jasper had considerably better aim, we left the bowling alley to have dinner. I had learned that the date was a joint effort of all three of them. Bowling had probably been Emmett's suggestion. Now I wondered who had choses the cozy and romantic Italian restaurant we were currently entering. The host batted her lashes at Edward and Jasper, completely ignoring Alice and me, but cowered back from flirting with Emmett after a murderous stare from Rosalie, who slid her hand in Emmett's in an obvious move to stake her claim. The boys were oblivious to the girl's blatant ogling, or had the good grace to pretend not to notice.

We were seated at one of the family tables, because of our number, which wasn't as romantic as the secluded booths in the corners, but I didn't really mind. Not when Edward moved his chair closer to mine and moved his hand to my knee the moment we both sat down.

Alice and I both ordered a Coke, as did Edward and Emmett, our designated drivers. Apparently, Rosalie and Jasper didn't want to be the only ones drinking, so they followed suit. Opening the menu, I took one look at the prices and decided to just order some soup. Everything was so expensive! Edward must have noticed my eyes widening in shock, because he leaned over and asked what was wrong. When I explained to him, he chuckled softly and told me not to worry, since the boys were splitting the bill, as they were taking us girls out on a date. And that I should get used to being spoiled a little. I blushed as he tucked my hair behind my ear, kissed my temple and told me to order whatever I'd like.

I decided on the _carpaccio_ and the _ossobuco con fettuccine_, while Edward ordered _bruschetta_, _calamari_ and the mushroom _ravioli_ with a salad. I for one couldn't stomach mushrooms of any kind, which was apparent in my facial expression, causing Edward to tease me a little when our food arrived.

'Who's Victoria?'

Edward's fork paused mid-air before he quietly set it back down on his plate. Emmett practically choked on his drink, Rosalie patted his back, trying to offer him some relief, and Jasper looked at us wide-eyed. The only one who didn't appear shocked by my question was Alice.

'Yeah, what's up with her? How come you guys know a skank like her?'

But before she could continue, Jasper took her hand and all but dragged her towards the restrooms.

'Baby, I need something from the car', Rosalie said.

Emmett waved his hand, indicating he had heard her, but keeping his gaze on Edward and me.

'You need to come with me.'

'Can't you get it yourself?'

'No. I need you to come to the car with me.'

My brother really couldn't take a hint.

'Emmett!'

He finally realized what Rosalie was doing, got up and followed her to the parking lot.

All the while, Edward was silent.

'I know you all know her. And that something's going on. Who is she?'

'She's not important.'

He tried to sound dismissively, but I could see how tense he had gotten. His jaw was clenched and his hands were in fists, knuckles white from strain.

'Bullshit. If she weren't, my brother wouldn't have spat his drink all over the table and Jazz wouldn't have dragged Alice away. Tell me.'

Edward sighed and raked a hand through his hair.

'She goes to U-Dub with us.'

'Edward...'

I knew there was more to the story. If she was just a girl he knew from college, he wouldn't be so hesitant in telling me and the others wouldn't have reacted the way they did. Victoria wouldn't have behaved the way she did at the bowling alley. Her actions were more than a little flirtatious, even though Edward had flaunted us in front of her. Which was another clue there was more than he was letting on.

Finally he looked at me.

'What do you want me to say?'

'The truth.'

'I'd rather not.'

'Why?'

'You're not gonna like it. And you're not gonna like me for it. And then you're gonna run away from me, screaming. Like you should.'

'I doubt it.'

'Trust me.'

'I can't if you keep stuff from me.'

He groaned. I kept looking at him, unwavering. I knew I was right and he knew it, too.

'You wanna know about my past? About my sordid ways?'

Not particularly. But there was no other way.

'Fine! I fucked her, okay? Now run along and tell your brother he was right.'

He put his head down on the table and tugged at his hair. Why was he so convinced I was going to run?

'What do you mean, tell Em he was right?'

'I'm no good for you', he stated miserably.

'Because you're not a virgin or a saint?'

That was just ridiculous. I knew he had a past and the little information I had gathered about it told me it wasn't pretty. But I also knew how he treated me. And that his past made him who he was today, good and bad.

'Because of all the fucking!', he exclaimed.

I cringed at the word.

'Edward, shut up! I knew what I was getting myself into the first weekend I stayed over.'

'What, you don't mind?'

'Of course I mind! But there's nothing either of us can do about your past, is there?'

'So Victoria...?'

'Is a skanky, slutty girl and I can't believe you actually...'

'I'm sorry I fucked her', he interrupted me.

What was I supposed to say to that? We were both quiet for a while. I was working up the courage to ask the other question that had been plaguing me since our encounter at the bowling alley.

'Is she... like... typical? I mean, did you... always...'

'Fuck?'

I cringed again, but continued my question.

'Girls like her?'

He avoided looking at me when he admitted it softly, 'Yes.'

Oh.

'Do you get... turned on... by fake tan, fake nails, fake boobs?'

'What? No!'

'But... the way she looks...'

'I meant, yes, I usually fucked girls who were easy, like her.'

_Oh._

'You'd be surprised how readily a lot of girls spread their legs or go down at you at some of these frat parties I used to go to.'

Oh.

'She got the boobjob... after.'

Oh. I couldn't contain a small giggle.

'So... when did you...?'

'Over a year ago.'

'Did you... sleep with her... a lot?'

'Bella, I never slept with her. I fucked her. A few times. Mostly somewhere in a bathroom or in the back of my car...'

When he noticed my frown, he quickly added, 'The car I sold last semester. Never in the Volvo. Never at my house. No girl has ever slept in my bed. And I never stayed the night after I fucked a girl. Didn't want them to think they were more than a means to an end.'

This alleviated my worried thoughts a little bit.

'When was the last time?'

I felt the need to take advantage of how open and forthcoming he was being in regards to the subject, as well as my own boldness in calling him out on it.

'With her or in general?'

'Both.'

'I don't know the exact dates, but she happened around September last year. As for... the rest... I haven't... been with anyone since Spring Break.'

'You mean you haven't had... sex... since late March?', I questioned.

Somehow, that seemed a little... off. I mean, he was still being referred to as _Sexward_. Surely that wouldn't be the case if he...?

He shrugged, 'I just didn't want to. It didn't feel right. And I got over the screwing around.'

We were quiet again. Then he tentatively reached over his hand to touch mine, which was lying limply in my lap.

'I'm sorry. About everything. I'm sorry you had to meet her. I'm sorry you had to find out like this. Are you okay?'

I nodded and bit my lip, willing myself not to cry. Even though he had assured me that it was all in the past, it had still hurt to hear all of that about him, and the way he berated himself because of it.

'Bella? Are you crying?'

'No', I squeaked unconvincingly.

He pulled me onto his lap and wrapped his arms around me, trying to comfort me.

'Shhh, baby, don't cry. I'm sorry, so, so sorry', he repeated over and over.

I sniffled a little before looking up at him.

'Just... don't lie to me or keep things from me, okay?'

'I promise.'

He sealed his promise with a tender kiss. When he pulled back, he glanced around and subtly waved, signaling it was okay for the others to return to our table. They had graciously given us some privacy, but I felt a little bad that they had to abandon their food to do so. Jasper hurried to assure me that it was of no consequence. Glancing over at Alice, I noticed she had reapplied her make up a little and her eyes were glistening. Maybe they had taken the opportunity to have a little talk of their own.

After that stressful talk and a few concerned glances from Emmett to Edward and me, the remainder of dinner was pleasantly filled with comments on the delicious food and some light banter. When it was time to order dessert, Alice and I were both torn between the vanilla _panna cotta_ and the _tiramisù_, so we ordered on of each and shared.

When the boys were settling the bill, I excused myself to use the restrooms. Alice came in when I was washing my hands and reapplying my lipgloss.

'Are you okay? Jazz told me about that... skank. I'm sorry, I really didn't know. I mean, I knew a little about... you know, things he did, but this... Ugh. It's disgusting! Anyway, I didn't want to ask you during dinner, but seriously, are you okay? We can...'

I put my hands up to silence her.

'Alice, it's fine. You couldn't have known, it's not your fault. Thanks for giving us some privacy, though. We talked and... I think it's okay. We'll talk when we get home, okay?'

She smiled and hugged me.

'Of course! The date isn't over yet. Are you having fun?'

I nodded and we left the restrooms, joining the others.

The last stop of our date was the observation deck of the Seattle Space Needle. I was obviously the only one in our group who had never been there, but on the elevator ride up to the deck, Edward disclosed that he had wanted to include it into my first real experience of Seattle. So that also answered the question as to who suggested the different aspects of the day. The other couples ventured out on the deck on their own while Edward pointed out the various landmarks and mountains. They were a little hard to see because of the dark, but I was also thoroughly distracted by Edward's arms around me and his breath on my neck as he whispered in my ear.

While Jasper and Alice said their goodnights quietly a little off to the side, Emmett pulled me into his signature bear hug.

'Hope you had fun today, Bells. Even though you had to have your big brother present during your first date.'

'I don't mind, really. And it _was_ fun. Thanks, for everything.'

'About Vi... the other stuff,' he amended, 'Call me if you want to talk, about anything, okay?'

I promised him I would and we went our seperate ways. I was glad he hadn't mingled in that particular discussion earlier. It had been hard enough just talking about it with Edward. I didn't need Emmett joining in on that. He really was trying to let Edward and me be.

Upon arriving at the Cullen home, Alice hurried up to her room, claiming she desperately needed to call Jasper. I resisted the urge to roll my eyes at her obvious attempt at giving Edward and me a few moments of privacy.

He walked me to Alice's bedroom door, where he pulled me in a tight embrace and kissed me gently goodnight. It was almost as if he was dropping me off at home after we'd had a proper first date – with parental consent. Except that in our case, I got to see him bright and early the next morning. Which made it even better.

I floated into Alice's room, changed into my satin nightgown and crawled into her bed with the biggest smile on my face.


	26. Educating Miss Swan

**A/N I've kept you waiting once again. Let me tell you, getting in Edward's head for this chapter was harder - pun intended - than anticipated. Let's hope I did well.**

**Disclaimer: SM owns Twilight and the canon characters; I came up with the rest. Please do not copy.**

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26. Educating Miss Swan

Sundays. Up until recently a day for sleeping in and hanging out with Jasper and Emmett. Maybe read a book or an article I could use for one of my classes. The odd family function or brunch with Esme. Deal with a hangover. Whatever. But that all changed three weeks ago.

Three weeks and two days ago I met Bella. A cute girl in a bad situation at a party she shouldn't even have been at. A cute girl I felt an almost immediate pull towards. A girl who was decidedly out of my reach. Never thought I'd refer to her as my girlfriend today. But that's how it turned out. For some unfathomable reason she decided I was worth her time. And I can't even begin to describe how that makes me feel.

Scared. Shitless. Because I've never felt this way about a girl before. Who am I kidding? I've never felt anything for any girl before her. I've never let anyone get this close. Hell, I invited her into my room, wanted her there. No girl beside my sister had ever set foot there. When she saw the family portrait on my wall, I didn't change the subject; I told her about it. I cooked her breakfast yesterday. I was attentive. Another novelty. I've never allowed myself to feel anything besides the obvious sexual attraction (if you could even call it that in some cases – sometimes it was just an easy lay) before. But I wanted more with her. And that thought scared me more than I'd have liked to admit.

Insecure. Because I didn't know where this was going. The situation was kind of out of my control. Would she still want me when she had uncovered all there was to know about me? I kind of opened up to her last night. She saw a vulnerable part of me. No turning back now.

Ashamed. Because of my past. 'Nuff said. Or not.

But most of all happy. Because Bella Swan was my girlfriend. Me, a girlfriend. Can you imagine that? I sure as hell never thought I'd see the day. And we had just had our first date. Granted, it was in the presence of our siblings and best friends, but still. I got to spend an entire day with her, without holding back. Without looking over my shoulder, afraid we might get caught.

About three things I was sure. First, there was a change in me, in part previously instigated, in part empowered by Bella. Second, I was falling for her. Hard. And I knew it. And, most of all, third: I didn't care. I welcomed it, even. I loved this feeling. How she made me feel.

I dare to say I was falling in love with her.

I woke up with a happy grin. Considering I had gone out the night before, I was extremely well-rested of nine o'clock on a Sunday morning. Should I take advantage of the relatively early hour by going for a run? I reached for my phone to call one of the guys, but then thought better of it. Jasper was probably still passed out – that guy could sleep all day if you let him – and Emmett... I didn't even want to know what he was doing right now. Besides, I didn't want to miss running into Bella over breakfast.

_Whipped much?_

Pathetic, I know, but like I said before: I didn't care anymore. The girl owned me and I was happy to admit it.

Making my way over to the shower I went over yesterday's events. Our first date had gone exceptionally well.

_Little emphasis on the exception._

Running into Victoria... not something I had anticipated and most certainly not something I had welcomed.

Up until that point it had all gone smoothly. Bella looked utterly at ease in her dark pants and bright pink hoodie. The color was such a stark contrast with her hair and skin, but in a good way, emphasizing her blush and her lips. I prefered the dark blue of the skimpy satin thing she slept in here, but pink was a close second. She just looked so naturally beautiful yesterday.

I couldn't contain my laughter when Alice started complaining, as was expected, about having to wear bowling shoes. Luckily, I had come prepared. And as soon as she had spotted Jasper, her worries seemed to be forgotten. Typical.

The bowling in itself was hilarious. I knew Bella was rather clumsy and Emmett was just a big goofball in general, but the way those two seemed to battle for the most failed attempts provided enough material for an entire series of slapstick films. But even though Bella couldn't hit the pins if her life depended on it, her good mood didn't suffer. Nor the way my eyes were glued to her every movement. Ogling my girlfriend? Yes, guilty as charged. But can you blame me?

When I walked back to our lane with a fresh round of drinks I noticed her. The last girl I wanted to run into. Occupying the lane next to ours. Victoria. In all of her sluttiness.

The guys were busy devising a strategy to make a spare out of a split, so they hadn't noticed her yet. But Rosalie certainly had, judging by the look on her face. And why was she talking to my sister? I felt the need to step in and make sure Victoria knew to back off, before she did or said anything incriminating. I quickly sidled up to my girl, putting our drinks on the table, and slid my arms around her waist in a slightly possessive gesture.

For the remainder of the game we all tried to pay as little attention to Victoria and her antics as possible. Crisis averted.

Or so I'd thought. Over dinner Bella surprised me by asking about that lapse in judgment. Out of the blue. Within moments our table was empty, save the two of us. At first I tried to make light of it and dismiss her saw right through me, of course. She wanted to know the truth. As she was entitled to. But I was convinced it would drive her away. Surely she wouldn't want to be with someone who had been so callous about sex. Who had fucked a girl like Victoria. Emmett was right: I wasn't good enough for her.

I was so angry at myself for already messing things up that I actually snapped at her. But she surprised me yet again. She basically said it didn't matter to her. Then proceeded to ask questions about it! And just in case I wasn't feeling bad enough about it already, I had to explain how I usually just fucked the cheap and easy girls. I tried to explain to her that I did maintain some boundaries, though, and that things with her were different.

The silence after that was... heavy. How would she take all this information? I expected her to be disgusted by me, or angry. What I wasn't prepared for was realizing I'd made her cry. She tried to deny it, of course, act all tough, but I heard the tremor in her voice and noticed she was fidgeting.

Damn it! I punched my fist against the wall of the shower, just thinking about it now. I had hurt my girl. She deserved better than that. I hit the wall again a couple of times for good measure, then rested my head against it.

At least I had been able to console her and apologize. She had let me hold her and kiss her. And that one confrontation aside, the date went perfectly. By the time we'd made it to the observation deck she was able to relax in my arms again.

But still, I wish I could've avoided that particular confrontation. Or at least postponed until I could tell her on my own terms, thoughtfully and with better timing. Why, of all people, did we have to run into Victoria? Why couldn't it have been Lauren, or Tanya? They had been willing, back in the day, but didn't flaunt their sexlife the way Victoria did.

_Karma's a bitch._

After a few minutes I registered the relaxing effect of the hot water and my anxiety abated a little. Other thoughts entered my mind. Memories of yesterday morning. Bella in her skimpy blue satin nightgown, perched on my lap, while I fed her breakfast. Trying to tease and distract her by softly kissing her. It hadn't taken long for her breathing to increase. I reveled in how responsive she was to me. I trailed one hand up her back and goosebumps broke out where I had touched the skin. Intensifying my kisses and nips to her neck, I noticed her nipples had hardened. I wondered if she'd let me touch her. Very carefully I pulled one of the straps down, revealing one of her breasts to me.

The memory alone was enough to get me hard again.

Her breast fit the palm of my hand perfectly. Her skin was even softer there. I wondered what she tasted like. My name tumbled off her lips when my tongue flicked her perfect, pink little nipple. When I looked up at her to gauge her reaction I saw wonder and excitement reflected in her beautiful brown eyes. I was hungry for her and as she pulled me closer I moved to lay her back onto the couch.

Thinking about it now, my right hand moved down my body. I thought back to how my hands roamed her body as I slowly started pumping.

It took me a while to work up the courage to slip my hand inside her panties, but once I did, I nearly came on the spot. Not only was she incredibly wet, she had also been waxed. Quite recently, I would guess.

The memory urged me on and I added more pressure, thinking about how hot and tight she felt around my fingers.

She started writhing under my touch and the most delicious sounds escaped her lips.

I was breathing heavily and had to lean on my left hand that was pressed against the wall for support. What this girl did to me, even just thinking about her!

_What happened to not tainting Bella's image, being a gentleman and all that shit?_

Well, that's been extremely difficult after yesterday.

_Just saying..._

Whatever. It's not like I had some sort of superhuman selfcontrol. Not over the way my body reacted to hers, anyway.

Then I started to fantasize how it would feel to have her touch me. She had tried to, but I didn't let her.

_Remind me again why?_

That moment was about Bella. Just her. But next time... I probably wouldn't stop her.

_You'd better not._

Slightly increasing the tempo, I imagined Bella's soft hand replacing my own, stroking gently. I rested my forehead against the tiles of the shower, too worked up to focus on much beside the fantasy and the feeling. Her name slipped out during a stifled moan.

A thud by the door followed by a low curse brought me back to reality.

Fuck. I hadn't been walked in on since I was, what, fifteen? Not counting the time I was fucking a girl on her desk when her roommate came home early. But that was a different situation.

I looked up and locked eyes with Bella.

'Shit!', she cursed again and started backing away, 'Sorry...'

She bolted out of my bathroom. I didn't think. I just ran from my shower, grabbing a towel on the way out and wrapping it around me as I went after her.

'Bella, wait!', I called.

I caught her at my door just as she was about to open it. I turned her around, but she wouldn't look at me.

'Are you okay?'

She shrugged and mumbled another apology. I coaxed her to look at me by tilting her chin up with my finger.

'What are you apologizing for?'

'I, uhm... y-you said I didn't have to k-knock, s-so I came in... B-but I didn't know you were... in the... shower...'

She was beet red and stammering through her explanation.

'Are you embarrassed?'

Nod.

'Because you saw me in the shower or because you saw what I was doing?'

'Both?'

I softly pressed my lips against hers.

'Still?'

'A little.'

I cupped her face and kissed her again.

'There's nothing to be embarrassed about.'

If it had been anyone else, yes, then probably. But not Bella.

'I was thinking about you, you know.'

She blushed again and tried to look away, but I was still holding her face.

'When are you gonna realize I'm all yours? I've got nothing to hide from you.'

She didn't respond verbally, but relaxed slightly in my arms, closed her eyes and sighed.

'How long have you been standing there?'

'A few minutes.'

She blushed, _again._ Was she still embarrassed about walking in on me? Could be, I mean, despite what happened yesterday morning, she was still rather inexperienced. She had told me so herself. Maybe she had never even seen a guy naked before.

While I was contemplating this, Bella seemed to relax some more and her hands, which had been immobile on my chest up until then, started tracing small designs. It wasn't until one of them reached my happy trail that I realized she might have been blushing for a wholly different reason.

'Like what you saw?'

I was only partly teasing her. She looked up at me through her lashes and nodded.

_Damn, she keeps biting that lip! Does she even know how big of a turn on that is?_

'You could have joined me...'

Her eyes widened.

Shit. Maybe that was too much.

I decided to take it down a notch and focus on making her feel good. And comfortable. I picked her up and she immediately wrapped her arms and legs around me. Man, did I love being able to do this. I kissed her again and carried her to my bed, leaning over to lay her down. I slided us both further toward the middle of the bed, effectively crawling over her. As Bella untangled herself from me I realized rather belatedly that I was still only clad in a towel. I grabbed it with one hand, holding it in place, while I moved to get up.

She frowned, 'Where are you going?'

'To put some clothes on. I case you hadn't noticed: I'm naked', I grinned and kissed the tip of her nose.

She put her arms around my neck and pulled me back down.

'I don't mind.'

_Okay, what?_

My girl was gaining confidence with every passing second, it seemed.

'It's just... I'm curious, you know? I saw you, earlier... but now I wanna see for myself.'

'I knew it!', I said, faking hurt, 'You only want me for my body!'

She laughed at my outburst.

'Seriously, Edward, I want to.'

Who am I to deny her what she wanted? I sat back at bit, giving her control. She pushed me back against the headboard and moved to sit beside me. She started kissing me again.

When she continued to do just that for the next few minutes – not that I was complaining, not at all, I could kiss her all day long – I figured she might be feeling selfconscious again, so I decided to encourage her to take the next step. I took her left hand and moved it to the top of my towel. I had shifted a little, which meant she could feel my erection when I gently pushed her hand down.

_That ought to get her attention._

Bella pulled out of our kiss, looked down at our hands and back up at me with a curious expression. After I nodded and released her hand she slowly removed the loose towel, keeping her eyes locked with mine. Bt I guess once the towel was gone, leaving me naked before her, her curiosity got the best of her and she chanced a glance down.

It was a good thing I was so incredibly turned on by her, because I was nervous as hell. Not knowing what she might have been expecting was almost as nerve-wrecking as not knowing what she was thinking when she laid eyes on me, all of me, for the first time. Not to sound cocky, but I wasn't exactly lacking in that department. I wasn't hung like some porn star, but I was definitely above average.

Bella didn't say anything. She just looked and stroked ever so carefully, letting her fingertips graze along the sensitive skin. To say I hadn't imagined before this moment what it would be like to have Bella touch me like this, even the smallest of caresses, would be lying. But to actually experience it now was almost mindblowing.

Bella looked back up at me and I realized my jaw had gone slack with the sensation and the sight before me. I tucked a stray lock of hair behind her ear.

'Show me how?', she asked.

Of course. She had never done this before. I placed my right hand over her left, reveling in the feeling of her hand around my cock, guiding her first pump. She seemed mesmerized by the motion and the feeling, as well. But after a few pumps she became bolder and added some pressure. I released her hand and leaned back to fully enjoy what she was doing.

'Like that?', she whispered and I could only reply with a moan. She was _that_ good.

She kept up the pace and the pressure, increasing the friction. I had a hard time believing this was the first time she ever did this. It felt so natural, being with her like this.

After a while I noticed her leaning in, a little hesitant. What was she doing? The rhythm her hand was keeping up slowed and almost came to a stop as she seemed to have made up her mind. She licked her lips and leaned in closer.

'Bella...', I half-whispered, half-moaned.

She startled and looked up at me.

'You don't have to do that...'

'Why? Don't you want me to?'

_If only she knew..._

'Uhm... I think that's pretty obvious.'

She blushed but also grinned almost triumphantly.

'But I don't want you to do anything you're not ready for.'

She scoffed, 'Who says I'm not ready?'

'I'm not... What I mean is, don't do it because you think that's what I expect you to do.'

'I don't. I just want to try.'

Again: I wasn't complaining. No guy in his right mind turns something like this down.

Before I could react one way or another, Bella leaned down decidedly and licked me slowly from base to tip. I shut my eyes tightly as I tried my hardest not to come that instant. Next thing I knew, she had wrapped her lips around me and started moving up and down, licking and sucking. Obviously, she was new to this. Still, it felt pretty amazing. Between the shower, Bella's proximity and the first blowjob ever she was giving me now, I wasn't going to last long. I opened my eyes, only to find her looking up at me.

_Fuck me. That's gotta be the hottest sight ever._

'Bella...', I panted, 'I'm... ugh... I'm gonna... I'm gonna...'

I tried to warn her I was about to come, because I wasn't sure she'd want me to do so in her mouth. But I couldn't hold out any longer and she didn't let go. I threw my head back and groaned out her name as I shot my release. Bella continued to amaze me, because she swallowed quickly, slid me out of her mouth and kissed my tip. I pulled her up to me and kissed her deeply. I could taste myself on her tongue, but I didn't mind as it was a reminder of what she had just done for me.

'Are you sure you've never done that before?', I asked her.

She just nodded and giggled.

_Fucking perfect..._

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_**A/N A special thank you to my RL friend F (I will spare you by not mentioning your full name in case you feel a little awkward about this) for putting up with my horny boy mode for the last couple of days and for allowing me to bounce off ideas. I know it must have been slightly uncomfortable/confusing.**


	27. Giving thanks

**A/N A huge thank you to littlestar300 for pre-reading this chapter for me!**** It's a little on the short side, but I didn't feel like dragging the event on and on without any major occurences.**

**Disclaimer: The lovely Stephenie Meyer owns Twilight and the characters. This story is the result of my overactive imagination playing with them. Copying it would be silly.**

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27. Giving thanks

'Are you sure we don't have to bring anything?', Renee asked me for the umpteenth time since, well, basically since Esme had extended her invitation.

Before I had gone home last Sunday, she had asked me about my plans for Thanksgiving, explaining that she was cooking a large dinner for her and Carlisle's joint family. She wanted Emmett and me to be there, too, since she considered us family as well. To say I was flattered would be an understatement.

So when I had gotten home I had asked Renee about it. She was a little surprised that the invitation had passed through me instead of Emmett, but when I explained that Esme was with Alice's father, she started laughing about what a small world it was.

_Yes, mom, and it's only going to get smaller._

Turned out Charlie would be out of town on a business trip. When I was little I'd hate all that traveling, but now, with his ridiculous attitude towards Edward, I didn't mind that much. But I felt a little bad for Renee, being left alone like this.

Renee happily accepted Esme's invitation, calling her to confirm and asking if we needed to bring anything. Esme insisted that dinner was taken care of and she was just happy to have us join them. Renee didn't want to show up empty-handed, so she had bought a very expensive bottle of red wine to go with the turkey.

'Mom, the wine is more than enough. Esme just really wants to have everyone together for the holidays, and since you're her daughter's mother-in-law and I'm her stepdaughter's best friend, that includes us, too.'

I conveniently left out that I was also Esme's stepson's girlfriend. Renee was sure to find that out soon enough.

She sighed, but I could tell she was still nervous.

'Mom, relax.'

'This is a big deal for me, Bella. I've only ever met her briefly a couple of times and I wanna make a good impression. She'll be family one day! And then the doctor... I guess I'm just worried I'll say something silly and embarrass myself. They're all so smart and classy and...'

'Mom, stop! You've got nothing to worry about! You've got a college education, you're not dumb. And Carlisle and Esme are wonderful people. So stop worrying, because this is making me nervous, too. Just focus on the directions so we don't get lost.'

When we pulled up at the house, I had to double-check te address. There was a _For Sale_ sign in the perfectly landscaped frontyard. I didn't know Esme was planning on moving...

We were walking towards the front door when it swung open.

'Bella, Renee!', Esme beamed, 'You've made it!'

She welcomed us into her house and graciously accepted the wine we had brought. She then mentioned that Emmett and Rosalie were already there, prompting Renee to rush into the living room.

'Does she know?'

I looked at Esme, a little taken aback.

'About you and Edward?', she whispered.

'She's met him, and liked him. I think. But she doesn't know we got back together after that.'

'Then I'll try not to mention anything. But please take some advice from me; don't lie to your mother. She'll be hurt. And she might surprise you if you tell her the truth.'

I nodded and we made our way over to the others. Esme was right; I didn't want to lie to Renee anymore. In fact, Edward and I had talked about that earlier that week. Or rather, I had told him about Esme's invitation and that I didn't want to hide us from my mother. He had said it was up to me to decide how and when to tell my parents, he just wanted me to be comfortable. Well, I'd be most comfortable just being able to _be_ with him, without reservations or fears lurking in the background.

'You look lovely, by the way.'

'Thanks. Rosalie helped me pick it out.'

I was wearing a dress that basically consisted of a dark blue satin strapless dress, covered by a black lace shortsleeved dress which closed high. What I lacked in cleavage, I made up for with the short hemline; the dress hit just below mid-thigh. I didn't have much cleavage to speak of, anyway, and I liked showing off my legs. Because of the occasion and the weather, I had paired it with dark blue leggings, so I wasn't showing too much skin. I knew Alice would have insisted I put on some heels, but I decided to wear black Converse for comfort.

We had just settled in the living room with some drinks, when we heard another car pull up. Moments later, Carlisle entered, followed by an energized Alice. Renee immediately became flustered, checking her dress surreptitiously, while I greeted them both with a hug. Alice shot a disapproving glance towards my shoes, but I stopped her from commenting.

'Shut it, Al, they're comfy.'

'But...'

'Actually', Rosalie interrupted, 'I think it's edgy. You know, design meets street? Besides, it suits you, Bells.'

I smiled at her in thanks.

'Bella, good to see you', Carlisle said as he kissed my cheeck.

'You, too. I'd like you to meet my mother, Renee Swan. Mom, this is Carlisle Cullen.'

They exchanged pleasantries and I could tell Carlisle's charm was already working. Edward took after his father like that; they were both very attractive and between them could probably make any woman swoon. Still, Renee had always been very perceptive, even though she might interpret the things she picked up not the way you'd expect, and the detail of the last name wasn't lost on her. Before she had the chance to comment on it or ask questions, however, Edward sauntered in.

I may have sighed dreamily at the sight. Just a little. But anyone would. Swoon-inducing, remember?

If I hadn't been preoccupied, I might have seen Renee looking from Edward to me with raised eyebrows, then shooting a questioning glare towards Emmett. But I so happened to be completely drawn in by Edwards approaching form.

You know how in movies things tend to be shown in slow motion, like when the hero enters for the first time, allowing the audience to fully appreciate his appearance? Somehow, Edward had that ability. Whenever I saw him again I always found a moment or two to take in his lean body, today clad in a black suit – wait, did I spot black Converse underneath? – and a dark blue dress shirt – coincidence or did Rosalie have something to do with that? – with the top two buttons undone, allowing just a small glimpse at his chesthair, and his handsome features. His gorgeous bronze hair, unruly as ever, his strong, scruff-covered jaw, his kissable lips, curled in his telltale smirk, his angular nose, his high cheekbones... I purposely saved taking in his eyes for last, because one look at those sparkling green orbs was enough to do me in. I felt like they could see almost right through me and straight into my soul. They were mesmerizing.

And trained on me.

Without even acknowledging the others in the room, Edward made his way over to me.

'Hey, beautiful', he whispered as he cupped my head in one hand while snaking the other around my waist, pulling me close to him, then leaning down to kiss me.

And this wasn't a chaste peck on the lips. I'm talking soft lips caressing mine, tongues gently licking, the works. I was glad he was holding me, because my mind was reeling.

'Hi', I smiled up at him as he released my lips.

Suddenly, I was accutely aware of all eyes in the room fixed on us. Keeping Edward's arm around my waist, I turned to Renee and took a deep breath.

'Mom, do you remember Edward?'

Edward extended his hand, 'Hello, mrs. Swan, it's nice to see you again.'

Renee had the presence of mind to shake his hand and mumble a greeting, but she quickly turned to me accusingly.

'You lied to me.'

'No, I didn't.'

She gestured towards Edward and looked at his hand around my waist with a raised eyebrow, 'Then what do you call this?'

'Undisclosed details?'

'How long has this been going on?'

'Since dad ungrounded me.'

Renee rubbed my arms in a slightly patronizing way and sighed.

'Bella... why didn't you tell me?'

'Because I was afraid dad would lock me in my room if he found out!'

Edward squeezed me gently, reassuringly.

'But sweetie, how will I know if you're telling me the truth now? I'll be left thinking you're safe while in reality you're off doing lord knows what!'

'Renee,' Carlisle interjected, 'to my knowledge, Bella has never lied about her whereabouts. I understand this is quite upsetting to discover, but trust me when I say Bella has been and will be safe in my home or her brother's. I pride myself in having instilled a certain level of respect in my son and I value Bella's safety as much as Alice's.'

'Yeah, mom, and I've already had the scary big-brother-talk with Eddie-boy here', Emmett added with a wink.

'Uhm... I... uhm...'

Renee appeared to be at a loss for words momentarily. Which didn't happen that often. She was almost as much a chatterbox as Alice. Almost.

Esme took the opportunity to direct us to the dining room, where a lavishly decorated table awaited us. White linen tablecloth and napkins, just begging for me to spill cranberry sauce over, heavy silver candlesticks with tall white candles and crystal bowls with red and orange carnations floating in them. The far wall of the room consisted of large french doors leading onto the back porch and overlooking the garden. They were framed by velvet champagne colored drapes. With what I'd seen of the house so far, it was obvious an interior decorator lived here. The walls of the room were bare except for two rather large paintings, both still-lives. One was definitely cubist, while the other appeared to be more antique. Esme caught me eyeing it and quickly answered my unspoken question.

'It's a seventeenth-century Dutch vanity piece. A gift from Carlisle.'

I was rather stunned at the revelation. I didn't know that much about art, but it sounded like this painting must have been pretty valuable. Come to think of it, the dining room set looked like it might have been antique, too.

Carlisle was seated at the head of the table, with Esme and Renee on either side. Jasper, Alice and Emmett sat next to Renee, while Edward, Rosalie and myself joined Esme on her side of the table. Aside from being very sought after professionally, Esme was a formidable chef. The food was delicious and conversation flowed easily. Both Carlisle and Esme expressed their regret for Charlie's absence, but also conveyed their hope that the uncomfortable situation regarding Edward and me would be cleared up soon.

After the appetizers, Carlisle called the room to attention to make an announcement, adressing the _For Sale_ sign I had noticed upon arrivel. Apparently, Esme and Jasper would be moving in with the Cullens as soon as they had a buyer for the house. Esme explained the situation briefly and thoroughly.

'I got this house in the divorce and it was perfect when the kids still lived here. But now, Rosalie has moved out, Jasper spends more time at his friends' places than here and, of course, Carlisle and I having been together for as long as we have, it only makes sense for me to put the house on the market and move in with him.'

Of course, this all made sense, and I was excited about the news. I chanced a glance at Alice, who appeared thrilled to have her boyfriend move in. I wondered how that would affect their relationship.

Throughout dinner, Edward kept some sort of physical contact, either by resting his arm across the back of my chair and playing with my hair or caressing my arm, or by putting a hand on my leg under the table. During dessert, he surprised me by taking my hand in his own, laying our joined hands on the table and directly adressing my mother.

'Renee, if it's alright with you, I'd like to take Bella out on a date tomorrow.'

My eyes might have widened a bit at his request. But what made my jaw drop was Renee's easy acquiescence.

'Sure. What time will you be picking her up?'

'Around noon? I won't keep her out too late, but I'd really like to spend the day with her.'

Renee nodded and moved on to another conversation.

I tugged Edward's hand, silently asking him to lean over.

'What did you do to make her give in so easily?', I asked quietly.

'I just had a little talk with her while you were helping Esme in the kitchen.'

_That must have been quite the talk._

I wondered briefly how that would fare with Charlie.

Alice, Rosalie and I helped Esme clear the table and load the dishwasher.

'That seemed to have gone rather well, hasn't it?', Esme asked.

'Yeah, I didn't expect her to take it this well, honestly.'

'Your mother appears to be very instinctual, honest and caring. You may have hurt her a little by keeping this from her until now, but I saw her observing the two of you tonight and if I read her expression accurately, she's already coming around.'

With that, she patted my arm and ushered us out of the kitchen.

During after-dinner drinks, Esme extended a lunch invitation to Renee, saying she'd love to get to know her better. My appreciation for Esme grew exponentially that night; inviting us over, graceful hostess, loving mother, offering advice, befriending Renee – who didn't have many friends here, yet, beside some of Charlie's associates' wives.

After some more smalltalk, Renee made to leave, stating that if she had any more wine, she wouldn't be fit to drive home anymore.

'You could always let me drive, you know', I joked.

'Don't be silly, Bella, you don't have you license yet.'

'Only because I haven't been taking lessons.'

'Did you get your permit?', Edward asked.

'Not yet. I haven't gotten around to taking the test.'

'Have you been studying?'

'Ever since I found out we were moving here.'

Edward seemed a little lost in thought after that.

'Well, Bells,' Emmett said, 'as soon as you get your permit, I'll teach you, okay?'

I hesitated a little. I mean, I'd love for my big brother to teach me how to drive, but the thought of doing that in his Jeep scared me.

'Uhm, no offence, Em, but do you really think your car is the best car for me to learn in?'

'You're more than welcome to use my car, if you want', Rosalie offered.

'However,' Renee added, 'you're not driving any car until you get your permit. And honestly, I'm quite tired. I think we should be heading home.'

'Okay, mom, but could you give us a minute?', I asked as I pulled Edward to his feet.

'Alright, alright, but behave! When I finish this delicious cappuccino – thank you, Esme – we're leaving.'

I didn't waste any time and quickly left the living room. Upon entering the foyer, I realized I didn't really know this house and as such had no idea where to go for some privacy without being too obvious about it. Edward took the lead and guided me around the massive stairwell to a hidden corner beneath it.

Upon my questioning look, he explained, 'I was pretty good at Hide and Seek when we were kids. This was one of my hideouts.'

It was small and cavernous. A child could easily hide in there, but we barely fit in the little nook, our bodies pressed close together. So far, no complaints. Edward also wasted no time and hurried to kiss me.

I sighed happily, 'I've missed you.'

'I've been right next to you almost all night, baby.'

'Not like this, with our parent's watching...'

'You're right. With them in the room, I couldn't do this...' he grinned and trailed his hands down my sides and to my butt.

Again, not complaining. I loved to feel his hands on me.

'Have I told you how incredibly hot you look today?', he asked as he hitched my left leg over his hip, stroking it from my thigh to my knee and back.

Pressing himself even closer, I could feel every inch of his rockhard body. Including every inch of his erection. Oh my... I lost my train of thought, if I even had it before, and could only humm in response. I made quick work of the buttons on his shirt, exposing his chiseled chest to my eyes and hands. I frantically moved my hands over it, trying to touch as much of his body in our limited time as possible, probably looking like a clumsy teenager in the process, but I couldn't care less about that. I was hungry for him.

All too soon, he pulled back, albeit reluctantly, and lowered my leg back to the floor.

'We should stop', he panted.

'Why?'

_Petulant little child, are we?_

'Because if we don't, I'm not sure if I _can_ stop anymore.'

I wish I had his selfcontrol. He was right. As much as I wanted to rip his suit off him – the suit that made him look so distinguished and sexy – I didn't want to get caught halfnaked mere hours after having confessed to my mother that I was still seeing Edward. Slowly, I rebuttoned his shirt. He took my hand in his and manoeuvred back into the foyer.

'Let's see how they're doing with that cappuccino, shall we?'

Renee was already getting into her car, eyeing Edward's ruffled hair and shirt and my blush with a smile on her lips. Edward opened my door for me and helped me in. Leaning in, he bid Renee goodnight and kissed me chastely on the cheek before closing the door.

Driving home, the silence in the car was deafening and the tension radiating off me almost palpable. I had no idea what to expect from Renee after tonight's revelations. Sure, she'd been pleasant and agreeing during dinner, but that could have easily been due to the fact that we were guests in Esme's home. Now, just the two of us, there was no telling what would happen. On the one hand, I was hoping she wouldn't say anything about it, deciding that everything had been said during dinner. But on the other hand, I wanted the confrontation, to clarify things without anyone else interfering. I just couldn't decide what to do, or when the most opportune moment for that was.

Renee made the decision for me by suddenly breaking the silence.

'I'm not going to stop you from seeing Edward. He is a nice boy who's obviously in love with you and I see no harm in you dating him. You tell your father in your own time, it's your responsibility, but I'm not going to lie for you either. If he asks me where you are, I'll tell him where you told me you'd be, and with whom.'

She looked at me pointedly before concentrating on the road again.

_Excuse me, what?_

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**A/N ****I'll be entering a one-shot for the All Hallow's Eve One-Shot Anonymous Contest (http:/twilightfanfictionworld(dot)com/Joomla/index(dot)php?view=article&id=77) which closes this month. So just a heads up that the next chapter may be a little late.**


	28. Moving in all sorts of directions

**Disclaimer: SM owns, I just play.**

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****28. Moving in all sorts of directions**

_Smart thinking, Eddie. You were successful in asking Renee i__f you could spend the day with Bella. Wouldn't it be nice to have a general idea of how to spend that time?_

My sarcastic inner voice had a point. I had just taken the opportunity when it was presented to me, not having any semblance of an idea for the date ready. But on the other hand, Bella was still relatively new in town, which provided me with ample date possibilities. I had also come across other bits of information last night that could prove useful. So while I was laying awake in the early hours of Black Friday, an idea was forming in my mind. After a quick shower, some googling and a few phonecalls over breakfast, I was able to text Bella.

_Goodmorning gorgeous! Will be there around f__orward to spending the day w/ u _

Renee opened the door smiling brightly and greeted me with a quick hug. I informed her of my plans for the day, asking if she was okay with them. Her approval was especially essential for the first part of what I had in mind. I also needed to get some papers from her.

Just as I was about to ask what was keeping Bella, my girl came bouncing down the stairs. She looked so adorable in her faded jeans – which, by the way, were very tight – cowboy boots, blue button-down and dark blue beanie. I was glad to see we were both dressed down – I was wearing Docs, darkwash jeans and a black turtleneck with my black leather jacket.

She all but jumped into my arms and I smiled at her enthusiasm. Ignoring Renee's presence, she kissed me while working her hands into my hair, pulling me closer. For a moment I lost myself in her kiss and tightened my grip on her waist. But as much as kissing her was taking over my mind, I was still aware of her mother standing just a few feet away. So after a while I pulled away and untangled her hands, taking one in my own.

'Edward, would you like something to drink?', Renee asked.

Bella started to protest, but I put a finger on her lips to silence her.

'Coffee would be great, Renee.'

As Renee turned back to the kitchen, Bella playfully bit my finger.

'What's with the sucking up? She already likes you. I wanna get going!'

'B, while I love your excitement, I think we should have some coffee with her now. I want her to keep liking me and I think she wants to talk to us. Besides, we've still got some time before...'

I quickly swallowed the rest of my sentence, not wanting to give anything away just yet.

'Before what?'

'Nothing. It's a surprise', I said as I began to steer her into the kitchen.

'I don't usually like surprises', Bella muttered.

'Why is that?'

'Uhm... I don't know... I don't like not knowing?'

I smiled a little to myself at that. She was questioning her own reasoning.

'Silly girl,' I teased, 'that's the whole point of a surprise! Have you had any bad surprises lately?'

I saw her thinking back for a moment before a cheeky smile made an appearance.

'No, not really, but they all involved you.'

'Then you know you'll like this surprise. Come on, just one cup of coffee, be nice to your mom, and we're on our way.'

Two steaming cups of coffee were already waiting for us when we entered the kitchen and Renee was seated at the breakfast bar.

'Look, Bella, Edward,' she made a point of looking at both of us before continuing, 'I'm not going to repeat myself. I think we've all made ourselves quite clear last night.'

I had an idea where this was going, but Bella didn't seem so sure, as she tensed beside me.

'Obviously, I'm not going to stop you two from... being together... dating. I'd rather know what you're up to than being lied to. That being said, Bella, I trust your judgment and I hope you know you can talk to me. Edward, don't make me regret this.'

'You won't, Renee.'

'Very well. Then I just want to remind you that I'll expect you to be where you tell me you'll be, Bells', she added somewhat cryptically, 'Have I made myself clear?'

'Sure...', Bella seemed a little confused.

I, however, knew what she was hinting at. Renee had told me the night before that she didn't want to lie to Charlie about Bella's whereabouts, which basically meant she expected Bella to be at Emmett's when she said she would be, or wherever for that matter, but she wouldn't have to provide detailed information on who else was there with her. Keeping Charlie in the dark by means of _undisclosed details_, as Bella had put it last night.

'Perfectly', I smiled brightly at Renee, earning another confused look from Bella.

Ten minutes later we were on our way. I had explained the whole 'keeping Charlie in the dark' reasoning to her, at which she had laughed and said it was a very Renee kind of thing to suggest.

Out of the corner of my eye I saw her stealing glances at me, but I waited for her to start. Obviously, there was something playing on her mind. After a couple more minutes of silence, I reached over and took her hand in mine, resting both our hands on the center console.

'So... I'm curious. What did you tell Renee last night that made her so agreeable?'

'What do you mean?'

'Well, she said some things that made me wonder.'

'Like?', I prompted.

'You told her you're in love with me?'

'That I did.'

'Oh.'

She was quiet again for a while.

I started to get a little anxious. What was she thinking?

Was it too soon for that kind of confession? Yes, I probably should have thought of that before I told Renee last night, but at the time I wanted her to know I was serious about Bella. I didn't want her to doubt my intentions. And I meant it.

But with every passing second my nerves increased and I started to wonder if maybe I should have waited with that particular revelation.

Finally, after what seemed like ages, Bella spoke again.

'Edward?'

'Yeah?'

'I'm pretty crazy about you, too.'

I exhaled in a rush, not realizing up until that moment that I had been holding my breath in anticipation. I was still holding her hand and brought it up to press a kiss to it, a huge grin breaking out on my face.

_Dude, she said she's crazy about you. That's not the same as 'in love'._

Maybe it isn't, maybe it is. She's seventeen and she hangs out with Alice. Who knows, in their world it might mean the same thing. Right now I was willing to take whatever I could get, as long as it meant being with Bella.

A few minutes later we arrived at our destination. Bella looked at me questioningly as I opened her door for her.

'What are we doing here?'

'I arranged for you to take the knowledge test so you can get your instruction permit,' I explained, watching her smile excitedly, making her eyes sparkle, 'Then after, if you want, I can give you your first lesson.'

'You're serious?'

I just smiled and nodded. Her smile widened even more in response.

'I think you're enjoying the surprise?', I asked, just in case.

'Definitely!'

At the desk I pulled out the paperwork I had procured from Renee: Bella's passport and a signed Parent Authorization form. I was very glad when Renee agreed to this, especially considering it was pretty last minute. But she thought it would be best if Bella started to learn how to drive sooner rather than later. Her school offered a driver training program, so she could take her necessary instruction and training there, but I really wanted to partake in this with her. Of course, Emmett had offered to teach her and I wouldn't deny him this as her brother, given that I had been in the same situation with Alice about a year ago. I really wanted to share this with Bella, though, so I had called him beforehand and he conceded, as long as he got to be there for at least thirty of the required fifty hours and the final driving test.

While Bella was taken to another room to complete her test I thought back to the night before and things I had considered for today.

Thanksgiving dinner had gone well, better than we had hoped. We hadn't really discussed how to clue Renee in on us; Bella had simply said she just wanted to be with me without having to jump through hoops. So when I arrived at Esme's I decided to come out in the open and claim Bella as mine. Renee was surprised, as was to be expected, and maybe also a little hurt that Bella had kept this from her. She relented quickly enough, responding to our explanations and apologies with acquiescence. Working my charm on her may have helped a little, too. I was glad I had been able to convince her I would do right by Bella. She was giving me a chance to prove my worth.

_Now you'll have to make sure you don't screw it up._

As for the rest of the day...

The selfish part of me wanted to take Bella home and lock ourselves in my room for some serious quality time. I had missed being alone with her. Since Sunday, we had only been completely alone once or twice when she came over with Alice after school, stealing a few moments together. It wasn't enough. I wanted her all to myself.

But I knew I had to come up with at least a few options for spending the day. Surely Bella would like to explore the city, maybe go to a museum. I recalled seeing an ad about the iceskating rink opening for the winter season again. Would she like that? She _was_ quite clumsy; maybe she didn't want to subject herself to potential embarrassment.

On the other hand, _I_ wouldn't mind making sure she didn't fall, holding her hand, maybe guiding her by placing my hands on her hips. Resting a hand on the small of her back, 'accidentally' sneaking it underneath her clothes, feeling her warm, soft skin under my fingertips. I'd manoeuvre us to the side of the rink, back her up against the boarding, leaning in close for a heated kiss.

It was crazy, the way our bodies reacted to one another, considering the short amount of time we had been together. It was as if we were pulled toward each other, like gravity, and my body responded to her touch almost instantly.

I was getting lost in my little fantasy and was pleasantly surprised when Bella materialized on my lap, giddy with excitement.

'Hey, baby!', she cheered and kissed me.

'You seem happy', I noted when she released my lips briefly.

'I got my permit!'

I couldn't help but laugh.

'And I only had two mistakes on the test!'

'That's great, B! What do you wanna do next?'

'Take you up on that lesson?'

I instructed her on the workings of my Volvo and before long Bella was pulling out of the parking lot and we were on our way.

Was I worried? Yes, a little, obviously, Traffic was busy because of Black Friday, and in hindsight it might have been better if I had driven us somewhere first, before letting Bella take the wheel. However, there wasn't anything I could do about that once we were on the road, so instead I gave her directions to quickly get us to a quieter neighborhood.

As we sat waiting at a traffic light I asked her what she wanted to do after her lesson.

'What? You didn't plan anything?'

'Not really, no. It was all rather last minute...', I started to apologize.

'Don't worry, I don't mind. I'm just glad to be legitimally spending time with you.'

She looked over at me and we exchanged goofy grins. We were pulled from our moment by a car honking impatiently behind us.

'Oh. Green light', I muttered sheepishly.

We continued on our way. After my initial instruction Bella hardly needed any guidance thus far. Of course, I shouldn't have been surprised given her aptitude at picking up new things and mastering them shortly. I shifted uncomfortably in my seat as my horny mind conjured up images of just how good she was at that.

_You're such a perv._

'No, seriously, what do you want to do today?', I finally asked her.

'I told you, I just wanna be with you. Hang out, whatever. I've missed being alone with you. Take a left here, right?'

She was navigating her way back to my place and I wasn't going to stop her. By the time she pulled into the driveway there wasn't a doubt that we would head up to my room for some alone time. As soon as Bella had put the car in _Park_ I was opening my door and making my way over to her side.

'So, how did I do?', she asked as I opened her door for her.

I pulled her to her feet and crushed my lips to hers, capturing her body between mine and the car. She immediately responded to my kiss, pulling me closer.

'You did great, B', I mumbled against her lips.

As we started to make our way inside Alice came barreling out. She skidded to a halt in front of my car when she noticed the keys were in Bella's hand. Her mouth dropped agape and she stared at us for a couple of seconds before audibly snapping it shut. I had half expected her reaction upon realizing I was letting Bella drive my car. I had never let anyone else drive my car before, neither the Volvo nor the BMW. When I was teaching Alice we always took my father's Mercedes.

'You're driving?'

'Yeah, I just got my permit.'

'That's awesome! Hey, I was gonna go over to Jessica's, wanna come and hang out?'

No way I was letting go of Bella today, so I spoke up before she had a chance to answer.

'Go away, Alice. You get to see Bella almost all day at school. I'm not sharing her with you today.'

She pouted and started to object while Bella shot me a reprimanding look.

'Sorry, Al, but I'm on a date with Edward. We're still on for tomorrow, right?'

That seemed to brighten Alice's mood again.

'Definitely! I can't wait to get my hands on that room of yours!'

'Great, Rosalie said she was gonna pick you up and we'd all have breakfast at my place. Say hi to Jess for me', she quickly added because I was already practically dragging her to the house.

'Will do,' Alice giggled and waved, 'Have fun. See ya!'

Once inside, I made a beeline for my room, not wanting to run in to any other family members. Bella smacked me on the arm.

'Don't be so rude to your sister.'

She tried to sound stern and annoyed, but I could hear some underlying humor in her voice.

'I'm sorry, babe, but I just don't wanna share you today.'

_Or at all._

'I want you all to myself.'

She pretended to contemplate my words for a moment, then shrugged.

'If you insist.'

'I absolutely do', I said as I picked her up to carry her the rest of the way to my room. She giggled, wrapped her legs around my waist and peppered me with kisses.

When we got inside I tossed her onto my bed, then hurried to lock the door and put my iPod in the docking station connected to my stereo. After selecting a playlist filled with slow songs by the likes of Usher, Lenny Kravitz and Sade, I turned around and made my way over to my bed, appreciating the sight before me. Bella had made herself comfortable against some of the pillows, eyeing me expectantly. Intending to spend the rest of the afternoon like that, I crawled up the bed and pulled her to me, kissing her slowly. Bella's hands immediately found purchase in my hair and she sighed into my mouth. I cradled her head in my left hand and moved my right to the small of her back, slipping it underneath her shirt. Opening the top buttons of her button down I pulled her collar to the side, placing kisses down the soft skin of her neck. I felt goosebumps break out across her skin, but if it was because of my kisses or from the contact of her warm skin with the cool satin of the sheets and comforter, I wasn't sure. I liked to think I had that effect on her.

Bella moaned and arched her back, increasing the contact between our bodies. I continued lavishing her neck and collarbone with kisses and soft nips while inching my hand down to caress her left breast throught the fabric of her shirt. I felt her nipple harden, which made me even more anxious to feel her skin. My other hand trailed down to cup her butt, squeezing it once, then further down her leg, hitching it over my hip. She responded by moving her hands down, too, around my back, pulling me closer. Just when I was about to further unbutton her shirt, she shoved her hands under my turtleneck, pushing it up. I helped her take it off and caught her ogling me. If I handn't been so incredibly turned on, I might have blushed from her heated stare. I didn't allow her to look at me for long, though, because I soon recaptured her lips with my own while swiftly ridding her of the button down she was still wearing, to reveal a dark blue tank underneath. This wouldn't do, so I made it my priority to remove the offending garment as well, leaving her in her jeans and bra.

Purple lace. Gorgeous.

Moving down her body, my fingers traced her soft curves, kissing my way down to the waistband of her jeans, where I popped the button. Easing down the zipper, I looked back up at her with a cocked eyebrow, silently asking for permission to continue. She bit her lip and nodded, already fisting the sheets beside her. I pealed her jeans off, then kissed and caressed her legs until I was level with the matching boyshorts she had on. I pulled at the waistband just a bit, revealing a little more of the skin below her hipbones, placing two kisses there. Again, I looked up at her, and again I asked her consent, before taking them off and discarding them at the foot of the bed.

Keeping my eyes locked with hers, I placed another kiss over her left hipbone, then trailed my lips down to her inner thigh. I wanted to make her feel worshipped, because I couldn't even begin to put into words what it meant to me that she let me do this for her.

My face being so close to her most intimate parts, I could see and smell her arousal. It was luring me in, but I was intent on making this moment last. She exhaled a shuddering breath when I skipped over that part of her body, only brushing along her, to lavish the same attention on the other thigh. I reversed the pattern I had started, kissing her right hipbone, then moving to the right, kissing the soft skin below her bellybutton.

Glancing up at her, I noticed she had closed her eyes.

'Bella,' I whispered, 'look at me.'

She opened her eyes, and when I was sure I had her full attention, I dipped my head and lightly licked, just one stroke. Bella's jaw had gone slack and she looked at me wide-eyed. Taking that as my cue, I licked again, earning a soft moan from Bella. This time, I focused a little more on her clit, massaging it with my tongue. She tasted unlike anything I'd ever tasted before; sweet, yet slightly salty, and completely... just... Bella. I continued savoring her languidly while cupping her ass, keeping her at a perfect angle.

Shifting my position a little, I slowly lowered her body back onto the matress, thus freeing my hands. I moved them to her inner thighs, one of them grazing the wet flesh just below my mouth. Bella gasped and one of her hands gripped my hair tightly, holding me in place. Slowly, I eased one, then two fingers inside her. I could feel her heartbeat around my fingers and throbbing against my tongue. Her breathing was getting heavier. I increased the pressure my mouth was exerting, while slowly pumping my fingers in and out. Resting my head against her left leg, I used my free hand to push her right leg up and out somewhat, further opening her to me.

She started mumbling incoherently between pants and I could feel her muscles start to tighten around my fingers, signaling that she was close to release. I only needed to tip her over the edge now.

Alternating licking and sucking on her most sensitive spot, I hummed, creating added vibrations, while curling my fingers inside of her, hitting that small, textured spot I located the first time I touched her. A fact I was still proud of. Bella responded to my efforts, bucking her hips against me and moaning my name. This only served to encourage me further. I could feel her tense up and increased the rhythm my tongue was exerting. Soon, Bella's legs started shaking and she let out a string of incoherent sounds, although I thought I picked up my name and _fuck_ a few times.

I continued my ministrations at a gentler pace until her legs stopped shaking. Only then did I lift my head again, to see hers still thrown back, eyes shut tightly and breathing heavily. After a couple of moments she opened her eyes and looked down at me, a lazy smile on her lips. Tenderly, she pushed my hair back and stroked my cheek lovingly before cupping my jaw, motioning for me to come up. I could still taste her on my lips, licking them appreciatively, making her blush.

'Oh my... Edward... that was... that was... _amazing_! I just... and then you... and then...'

She was a rambling mess, but to me, she made perfect sense. I felt exactly the same. I loved that I could do this for her, make her feel this good.

This was the one thing I had hardly ever done with a girl before, and the few times I _had_ done it, it had never been like this. This intense. Which made the experience even more special.

'I know, baby.'

'Right?', she giggled.

I moved to get off her, but she quickly wrapped her arms and legs around me, securing me in place. I was happy to stay in her arms, listening to her pounding heart, breathing in her scent while nuzzling her neck.

'I'm gonna go get cleaned up,' Bella announced, 'Hand me my underwear?'

It was endearing how, even regarding our previous activities, she was still rather selfconscious about being semi-nude around me.

I rolled off her and quickly retrieved the purple lacy boyshorts I had deposited on the footboard. After putting them back on she hopped off the bed and made for my bathroom. Standing in the doorway, she looked at me over her shoulder and smiled shyly.

'Care to join me?'

_Hell yeah!_

I was already standing at full attention after what I just did – who knew getting my girlfriend off could be such a turn-on? – but the sight before me now; that incredibly sexy girlfriend in nothing but her underwear, emphasizing her beautiful body and creamy skin, blushing like that... She was the epitome of innocent sexiness... or sexy innocence... whatever, and it was turning me on even more, making my jeans seem uncomfortably confining.

I practically jumped off the bed and hurried over to where Bella was standing. She giggled at my eagerness, to which I could only shrug.

'I'd be a fool to turn that down, baby.'

She might have been owning me completely, that didn't stop my cocky confidence from making an appearance from time to time.

While Bella turned the water on to heat up, I took out a couple of towels and placed them on the counter next to the sink. I then made quick work of my jeans, internally breathing a sigh of relief at the much needed extra room.

Bella was positioned just outside my shower, reaching in to test the temperature. I moved up behind her and rested my hands on her hips. I skimmed my nose from her shoulder up her neck to her ear, whispering her name and pulled her against me, my prominent erection caught between us, pressed against her lower back. She froze and gasped. Slowly, I slid down one of her brastraps.

'Uhm, Edward?'

I stopped and she turned around in my arms. She rested her hands on my upper arms but didn't look at me as she spoke.

'I didn't mean to get your hopes up... but... I'm-just-not-ready-for-_that_-yet', she rushed the last part, her blush even deepening.

To say I wasn't a little disappointed would be a lie. But I also knew this was to be expected. And as much as I longed to claim her in every way, to show her what I felt, physically, I didn't want to rush her.

Putting a finger under her chin, I coaxed her to look up at me. I tried to convey my sincerity with my gaze.

'B, I'm not expecting that. Yes, I'm a guy, and as you can probably tell, you have a certain effect on me,' I grinned, 'but we're taking this at your pace, alright? Whenever you're ready. But until then, I just wanna be with you and make you feel good. Okay?'

When she nodded her understanding, I kissed her. Bella moved her hands to my chest and then further down. She hooked her thumbs in the waistband of my boxers and slid them down, thus freeing my aching cock, while sinking to her knees. Then, in a move that made me fall even more in love with her – and yes, at this point my feelings were completely and irrationally tied to my physical reactions – she looked up at me sweetly and placed a quick kiss on my cock, which actually twitched at the contact.

When she stood back up, Bella moved to take off her bra, but I stopped her.

'Allow me.'

_Geez, can you possibly sound any huskier?_

We locked eyes as I unclasped her bra and slid it off her body. Then it was my turn to get on my knees as I pealed off her panties. When she was once again naked before me, I got back to my feet, caressing her skin on the way up, before capturing her lips in a kiss.

When I opened my eyes, the room was already steaming up, so I opened the shower door and stepped under the spray, pulling Bella with me. She stepped under the showerhead and closed her eyes as she tilted her head to soak her hair, offering me a spectacular view of the water running down her naked body. As she ran her hands through the wet strands, I took a moment to appreciate Bella in all her glory for the first time. She was so tiny, but with curves in all the right places; from her long, toned legs, leading up to a well-proportioned ass, to her tiny waist that I could almost completely wrap my hands around, and her flat stomach. And then her breasts: they were just the right size for her frame. Round and perky, they were firm yet soft.

She squeezed her eyes shut and scrunched up her nose in the cutest way while rubbing her hands over her face, getting rid of the excess water before opening her eyes.

'Fucking perfect', I breathed.

Before she had time to respond or react one way or another, I had taken her head in my hands and captured her lips in a heated kiss. I pulled her flush against me, her hands slipped around my waist and she kissed me back hungrily. The hot water was raining down on us, adding to the heat and anticipation crackling between us. Running my hands through her wet strands I tilted her head back, exposing her throat to me, licking and sucking on her skin.

The feel or her soft, slick body against mine made me harder still and I groaned, fighting the urge to thrust inside her, my hips bucking against hers. Bella responded, grinding against me, making it even more difficult for me to keep my urges under control.

Not ten minutes ago she had told me she wasn't ready; I didn't want to push her. And I sure as hell wasn't going to take her virginity in my shower! When she was ready and would let me...

_When?_

Yes, _when._

_Who says she's gonna give it up to you?_

A guy can hope, can't he?

Anyway, I was going to make it special for her, a night worth remembering. Not hurried, uncomfortable, and definitely not while my father and Esme were in the same house.

_Aren't we turning into a romantic sap._

Whatever. Bella deserved it.

So when I began to fear my brain was being clouded by lust, I pulled back.

'Baby, if you keep on doing that...', I shook my head, 'You're making it very hard to contorl myself.'

Bella slipped a hand between us, stroking me while grinning cheekily.

'Hard, huh? I can tell...'

I moaned and involutarily thrusted into her hand. This confident, provocative side of her was going to be my undoing one day.

_Don't you dare tell me you're complaining! Admit it, you love that she's exploring her sexuality with you._

'I don't wanna take advantage of you', I panted while she gripped me more firmly and slowly started pumping.

'I know, baby,' she practically purred in my ear, 'and I think it's amazing that you're willing to wait.'

Her hand around my cock was slick with water and precum as she passed over the head with her thumb.

'But,' she continued, 'we can still do other stuff. Please, Edward, let me make you feel good.'

How could I deny her when she used my own logic against me? Not to mention the sensations her hand was causing and the way she looked up at me, all big, innocent, brown eyes framed by long, dark lashes.

I surrendered to her touch and kissed her. Already, she knew how to read my physical reactions and alternated her grip and tempo accordingly. I felt the telltale tightening in my abs and balls. Dropping my head to her shoulder, I put my right hand on the wall behind her while holding on to her with my left arm. She seemed to sense I was close, because she used her free hand to gently massage my balls while pumping me hard.

That was all it took. I grunted her name as I shot my release over her hand and stomach.

The girl's hands were magic!

When I lifted my head and opened my eyes, I was met with Bella's smug smirk. She was still stroking me. While I appreciated the gesture, my erection was fading and my now sensitive cock twitched at the contact. Kissing her softly, I pried her hand away from me and proceded to clean up the mess I had made.

Bella giggled as I picked her up and carried her out of the shower. I quickly wrapped one of the towels around my waist, then used the other to wrap around her. Usually, I couldn't care less about the kind of detergent we used in this house, as long as it did what it was supposed to do, but in this moment I was glad Esme stocked our laundry room with fabric softener and those little sheets you put in the dryer, because the large, white towel was soft and fluffy – perfect for Bella.

_Dude. Seriously? You're turning into a girl! Since when do you care about fluffy towels and fabric softener?_

Bella grinned up at me and I had to admit it was a rather comical sight: the towel was so big she was completely cocooned by it. I kissed the tip of her nose, then started drying her off.

Bella regarded me as I did so, and I couldn't take my eyes off hers, getting lost in them. Her gaze softened as she reached up her hand and lightly traced the side of my face, from my temple to my jaw.

'What are you doing to me?', she murmured.

_Drying you off._

Taking care of her.

'I'm falling for you,' she sighed, 'so hard...'

In response, I leaned in and kisses her. Her soft lips moulded to mine perfectly and as she opened her mouth and searched out with her tongue to find mine, that's when it hit me. This, right here, right now, this moment, this feeling... it was everything and anything I would ever need.

Bella leaned into me and as my hands moved to her waist, the towel, the ends of which I was still holding, fell open, exposing her naked skin once more. I felt her bare breasts press against my chest and I could feel her heart beating wildly. Again, her hands quickly found their way into my hair. When she tugged, it sent spurts of electricity straight to my groin and reawakening cock and I couldn't help it; I pulled her closer against me and pressed my hips against hers. Bella moaned into my mouth and I knew I had to make her come again. Swiftly, I lifted her up on the counter next to the sink and positioned myself between her legs. Keeping one hand on her hip, I moved the other between us, testing and teasing her still bare flesh. She was so wet – again, still, who knows? – causing my now fully erect cock to strain against my towel.

She held me close to her, locking me in place. As if I was going anywhere anymore! Suddenly, one of her hands flew to my towel, trying to loosen it.

'What are you doing?'

'I need to see you', she replied as she dropped my towel to the floor and gripped my cock in her hand.

My hips jerked at the contact and I could feel her getting even wetter on my fingers. This must be turning her on about as much as it was turning me on.

_Geez, you think?_

Bella hooked her ankles around the backs of my legs, pulling me closer, and scooted more to the edge of the counter. My cock was now only inches from where it longed to be, begging to replace my fingers. She pushed closer still, grinding her hips against me, creating the most excruciatingly amazing friction. I could actually feel how wet she was on my cock.

_Okay, now we just need to push forward a little bit and we're home..._

Instinctively, I moved even closer. I was now grazing against her, but before I could move any further, she tensed up again.

'Edward...', she whispered.

I couldn't bring myself to open my eyes yet. I was too ashamed. I had been so close to literally pushing her too far, to taking her on my bathroom counter in the heat of the moment...

So instead, I rested my forehead against hers and exhaled heavily, trying to calm down and willing my aching cock into submission.

'Hey,' she said, and kissed me, 'look at me.'

When I opened my eyes, instead of the anger I was expecting, I found heat and lust in her gaze, combined with something else... frustration?

'Damn it, Edward, I want you, so bad, but...'

'But you're not ready,' I sighed, resigned, 'I know.'

'I swear, I'm not trying to be a tease...', she started to apologize, but I interrupted her.

'Believe me, I know. This is all new to you. It's new for me, too. We'll have to work together in this. I just don't want to overstep your boundaries, but you're too desirable for your own good.'

She smiled and kissed me again and pulled me close once more.

'You feel so good against me, baby,' she moaned and ground her hips against mine, 'Just try not to slip inside, okay?'

'I think I can manage that.'

But before we could really continue our sort of naked dry humping, there was a knock on my door. I groaned internally at the interruption, yet did not let go of Bella and merely rolled my eyes, to which she giggled.

'Edward?', my father called from the other side of the door.

I knew he wouldn't leave until I had answered; my car was parked right outside, so he knew I was home. Best answer and get it over with.

'Yeah?'

'Esme's got dinner almost ready. Are you coming?'

'In a minute!', I called back, while winking at Bella, who had to stifle laughter by now, the double meaning not lost on her.

When I had heard my father leave, I intended to finish what we started, but Bella moved to get off the counter.

'Where do you think you're going?'

'Uhm... get dressed? Carlisle said dinner...'

'We've still got about twenty minutes before it's actually ready. And besides, I'm not done with you, yet. I need you to come again before we leave this room. I won't be able to for at least a couple of days and I don't do anything halfheartedly.'

'Oh, alright,' she said, 'If you must.'

'Oh, I abso-fucking-lutely must.'

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**A/N I'm sorry it took me so long to update. I've been having a rather crazy time lately, starting a new job and finishing up at the old one. Also, I was seriously lacking mojo for a while and found it difficult to concentrate on my writing. But things are looking up now**** (a Halloween getaway to London with my BFF and another friend helped a lot) and I hope you'll forgive me for the delay. Plus, I gave you THREE (well, two and a bit) lemons this chapter =)**

**I've been doing some beta-work on Littlestar300's new fic****s **_**Love's Little Book**_** and **_**Born Thrice**_**. Check them out here: http:/www (dot) fanfiction (dot) net/s/6344201/1/ and http:/www (dot) fanfiction (dot) net/s/6456517/1/Born_Thrice and leave her some love.**

**Also, I intend to write a o/s for The Cherry Exchange http:/www (dot) thecherryexchange (dot) com which is accepting entries throughout November. Well, if I manage to finish it in time :p**

**Finally, I've been getting ideas for a new fic, which will be AU from New Moon onwards. Be sure to put me on author alert if you're interested.**


	29. Chocolate

**A/N Finally! I managed to get another chapter out. I'm sorry for the delay, but as you can see on my profile, I wrote 2 oneshots in the meantime. One was a Secret Santa gift, the other is an entry in the Pick a Pic ****challenge (****www (dot) fanfiction-challenges (dot) blogspot (dot) com)**** Don't forget to vote in that last one!**

**Lately I've been WC'ing a lot with a few girls I 'met' on Twitter**** – ladies, you know who you are: thanks for the feedback and motivation!**

**Special thanks to JennyK ****(http:/ www (dot) fanfiction (dot) net/ u/ 1677911/ Jessie_Chase and http:/ community (dot) livejournal (dot) com/ jessiechase) for pre-reading this for me!**

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29. Chocolate

To an outsider, Alice and I probably looked like two overly energetic and happy teenage girls. Truth be told, we were. Just not in the usual shallow way. We weren't gushing over the latest gossip about the current Hollywood heartthrob. We also weren't concerned with high school popularity ratings, like the cheerleaders were. Having Jasper and Edward pick us up from school on several occasions proved a sure way to silence Whitney and her ladies-in-waiting. No, our perky demeanors were not caused by such fickle events. Our boyfriends, on the other hand, had a lot to do with it. And we were both on our way to see them.

Esme had sold the house mere days after Thanksgiving and we had spent most of our free time helping them pack up and move into the Cullen house. I envied Alice a little, being able to see her boyfriend whenever she wanted, when I couldn't. True, Renee had kept her word and hadn't told Charlie about Edward and I could see him when I was at his house or Emmett's. But Alice got to be with Jasper until she went to sleep, only to see him again at breakfast. She tried to convince me that, although it was nice having him around so much, it also provided more awkward situations and they also had to deal with the scrutiny of not one watchful parent, but two at the same time.

_Yeah, a very trying situation, I guess._

Driving home from school, Alice had turned up the volume of her radio and we were happily singing along to Christina Aguilera's _Candy Man_. Alice made a good effort in mimicking her playful expressions and gestures and I was playing along just the same.

'_He's a one stop shop, makes my cherry pop, he's a sweet talkin' sugar coated candy man'_, she yelled at the top of her lungs.

'I'm sure Jasper would pop your cherry just fine', I joked.

'Oh, but he did' she smiled at me mischievously.

'Wait, what? Pull over.'

I waited until she had come to a full stop and cut the engine.

'When did this happen?'

'Last night!' she all but cheered.

'Okay, explain. I'll need more than that. This is major!'

'I know, right? Okay, so we had just picked up the last of his stuff and I was helping him unpack in his new room. Which, by the way, as you may have noticed, is just down the hall from mine.'

I remembered. Edward had been adamant that Jasper would not place his bed anywhere near the adjoining wall, even though there were a bathroom and a closet separating their rooms.

'Anyway, Dad and Esme went over to do a final check on the house and meet the realtor, so we had the place to ourselves for a couple of hours. So we started making out and before I knew it I was naked on his freshly made bed and Jazz was hunting down a condom. It was so cute, because he forgot where he put them. But then I remembered seeing them in his bathroom earlier, so that worked out okay', she giggled.

This explained her cheerfulness all day. Alice was usually happy, but today she had been even more elated.

'So…,' I prompted, 'How was it?'

'Uhm… yeah… it was a little uncomfortable at first. I mean, he's so tall and I'm, like, not… And also… he's pretty, uhm, hung', she wiggled her eyebrows.

'How do you know?' I asked, 'Did you compare it to anything?'

'Well, for one, my straightener is only slightly bigger…'

My eyes were literally bugging out of their sockets at this revelation. Who would have thought lanky Jasper would be that well-equipped?

'And second, it took us a few tries before it all fit. But once it did… Damn, B! It was perfect! He just… kept looking at me the entire time, asking me if I was okay… And then, afterwards… he held me and kissed me and told me it was his first time too and that he loved me.'

Her eyes were brimming with tears and I quickly leaned over to hug her.

'Oh, sweetie, that's wonderful! Did you say it back?'

She nodded.

'Did you come?'

She laughed through her happy tears, 'No, but I wasn't expecting to. I'm just glad it didn't hurt. I was so scared of that, because Jess told me her first time with Mike was really painful and she bled like crazy.'

I shuddered at the thought. So far, anything sexual I had done with Edward had been pleasurable. I didn't even want to think about him hurting me.

'I'm so happy for you, Al,' I finally said, 'But let's get home already. I've missed my boyfriend terribly.'

She laughed, wiped her eyes and started her car again.

'So, how are things with you and Edward in that department, by the way?', she asked, giving me a sideways glace.

I blushed, but couldn't keep the smile off my face.

'That good, huh?'

'So far, yes.'

'What do you mean, so far?'

'Well… we haven't, uhm… done everything… yet' I admitted.

She nodded knowingly.

'He's not pressuring you, is he?' she asked after a moment's silence.

'No!' I shouted, 'He said he'd wait until I'm ready.'

'That's good. I'm glad to see Em and Jazz have had a positive influence on him.'

'And in the meantime,' I continued, winking, 'he just wants to make me feel good. Really good.'

We both giggled at that.

'Seriously, though, B,' Alice said, 'he's so different since he met you. Sure, he had flounced the harem and the playboy car a while ago… But ever since you showed up… I don't know. It's been noticeable.'

'What do you mean?'

'Well, he's a lot calmer and more at ease now. And happier. Do you know I actually caught him playing the piano last week?'

'Edward plays the piano?' I asked incredulously.

How had I not known this?

'Used to. When Mom was still…' she shook her head and my heart ached for her, for them, 'But after she died, he stopped. Said it hurt too much. But then, last week, he was playing again. And not just any piece, but Mom's favorite. _Claire de Lune_', she said, voice thick with emotion.

I reached out to touch her hand, letting her know I was there for her. She gripped my hand and looked at me intently before focusing on the road again.

'You did that, B, and I love you for that.'

I honestly didn't know what to say. Sure, Edward was open and relaxed around me, but I didn't know him any other way. Come to think of it, though, I had noticed Carlisle looking at him lately like he was relieved.

'And then the whole girl thing,' Alice continued, 'It's so ridiculously obvious how in love that boy is with you! Like, before, of course I had an inkling what he was up to. I'm neither deaf nor blind. But he never – _ever_ – brought a girl home with him. He would fool around at parties and fuck them in their dorm or the back of the BMW, pretty much anywhere, but at home. I doubt any girl other than you, me, Esme and the cleaning lady, has seen his room. What I'm trying to say is, he's different with you, and it's a good different.'

We both looked at each other with teary eyes, processing the magnitude of what she had just shared.

When we got to the house, I dropped my bag in Alice's room and hurried over to see Edward. I couldn't wait to have some alone time with him. The past few days had been so busy, helping with the move and everything, we had barely gotten a moment to ourselves. I needed to kiss him and be held by him, feeling his hands exploring my skin. I was still amazed at how in-tune we were to each other and how much I craved his touch and our physical connection.

His door was slightly ajar and I could already hear soft music coming from his speaker system.

I smiled to myself.

He was waiting for me.

It was too bad I still had homework to do, because a few days before, I had decided. I was ready.

It could have happened the day I had decided. It would have been perfect. Alice had gone over to help Esme right after school, so I had caught a ride with Angela. By now, I knew where the Cullens kept their spare key and was allowed to let myself in. Upon entering the house, I heard music coming from somewhere downstairs and a delicious smell lured me to the kitchen. As I was approaching the kitchen I heard a lot of clambering and Edward uttering a string of profanities. What was he up to?

Rounding the corner – 'What's going on in here?' – I stopped short and couldn't contain my laughter as I took in the scene before me. There were bowls and utensils scattered across the countertops interspersed with plates of cut-up fruit. There was a pot on the stove and Edward, disheveled hair and aggravated expression on his face, was wiping down one of the cupboards. Upon hearing me laugh, he turned around.

'Are you laughing at me?' he accused.

Still laughing, I held up my hands in defense.

'No, no… I'm laughing at the chaos in this kitchen. What are you doing?'

He frowned.

'Well, I was _trying_ to melt chocolate and dip fruit in it for you, but it's not really cooperating…'

'You wanted to make me a snack? That's so sweet!'

'The occasion called for it', he shrugged.

'What occasion?'

'It's been a month since Halloween', he clarified.

I blanched. Had it already been a month? I mentally checked the calendar – yes, he was right.

'Shit, baby, I'm so sorry! I completely missed the date!'

'That's okay, love,' – he had started calling me that on occasion a week earlier and, even though it was a little old-fashioned, I secretly reveled in it – 'A lot has happened. What's important is that you're here.'

He walked over to me and kissed me sweetly.

'Happy anniversary,' he whispered against my lips, 'Now, let me clean this up real quick and we can salvage what's left of it.'

He continued wiping the spilt chocolate. There was another bowl of already molten chocolate on the counter and a plate of chocolate-covered strawberries and banana slices. I took a bite and hummed in appreciation, causing Edward to look up at me.

'You like?'

'I like', I confirmed, and leaned in for a kiss.

'Hmm… chocolate and Bella… very nice.'

While he was distracted, I dipped a finger in the bowl and smeared some chocolate on his lips before licking them clean. He gaped at me for a moment, then kissed me and lifted me up on the counter, moving to stand between my legs. Cupping my face in one hand, he deepened our kiss while reaching around me with the other. Suddenly, I felt something warm and sticky on my cheek, before I felt his tongue lick at it. I reached for the hem of his shirt, lifting it over his head and tossing it across the kitchen.

_Liking this game so far… So much to play and have fun with._

I trailed my hands over his chest, loving the tickle of his chest hair and seeing goose bumps arise because of my touch. I hooked my fingers in the belt loop of his jeans and used my other hand to apply some chocolate onto his chest, proceeding to lick it off while looking up at him through my lashes. He was looking at me with hooded eyes and a low moan escaped his lips. Using the grip I had on his jeans, I pulled him close for another kiss. He pulled me flush against his body and, instinctively, I wrapped my legs around him, securing him in place. There was hardly any room between our bodies, allowing me to feel exactly how turned on he was by our actions. His hands roamed my body, leaving sparks and tingles in their wake. Hurriedly, he undid the buttons of my shirt, tugging it out of my skirt and pushing it open. His fingers trailed across the edge of my bra cups, before he dipped his hands inside, lowering the cups and freeing my breasts. My nipples hardened as he brushed his thumbs over them. Looking at me, he dipped a finger in the bowl of chocolate and spread it around my breasts.

'Oops…,' he grinned, 'I'd better clean that up.'

I held my breath in anticipation as he lowered his head and, torturing slowly, licked and kissed the chocolate off me. My hands flew up into his hair and I tugged lightly, earning a groan from him. When I locked eyes with him again, I saw my own need and desire reflected in his. They had transformed from a playful, grassy green to a dark, lust filled jade and the intensity I found in them caused a lump to form in my throat. I swallowed, suddenly nervous, and found myself breathing heavier.

It was in that moment that I realized: I wanted him. Desperately. And this time, I was ready.

I pulled him back to me, kissing him, trying to convey my need for him through the kiss. My hands traveled down to the button fly of his jeans on their own accord and I fumbled a little, trying to unbutton it without having to break our kiss. Finally I succeeded and I slipped my hand inside, pleasantly surprised by the lack of underwear. I gripped his hard length and slowly started pumping, running my thumb over the tip when I reached it. He pulled out of our kiss and I licked my lips, trying to capture his taste a little longer.

'Bella…', he moaned.

'What?' I asked innocently, while keeping up the motions of my hand.

'Fuck! That feels so good… But, uhm… oh damn… you know we're in my kitchen, right?'

'Uhuh,' I nodded, 'And I don't care.'

He removed my hand from his pants, clasping both of mine in one of his behind my back and grinned at me wickedly.

'Oh, you _really_ shouldn't have said that.'

I gasped as his lips crashed onto mine again with renewed fervor and he started tugging at the zipper of my skirt.

'As hot as this uniform looks on you, it looks even better when it's off you', he all but growled, sending shivers down my spine.

His forwardness made me a little anxious all of a sudden. Don't get me wrong, I loved it when he took charge and showed his desire for me, and I sure as hell didn't mind making out with him, even when we were at risk of being caught. And we _were_ alone for the time being. But still… you never knew when someone could come home unexpectedly. And I wasn't too keen on having my first time happen in a messy kitchen.

'Edward?' I panted – because, despite my slight anxiety, I was still incredibly turned on, not to mention he was practically devouring my neck, 'Your room?'

He pulled back, his hungry gaze fixed upon me, but after a moment or two he calmed down a bit and nodded. He wouldn't let me get off the counter, though. Instead, he picked me up and started to carry me into the hallway and up the stairs, continuing to kiss and grope me.

We had made it about halfway up the stairs when the front door opened and Emmett, of all people, bellowed Edward's name.

We froze. We both cursed under our breaths.

'Eddie! Where are you? Come on, Jazz needs our help! Oh, hey, man… What the hell? I don't need to see that!', he backtracked as soon as he spotted us in our rather compromising position.

Edward gently untangled me from him, lowered me to stand on the stairs and rebuttoned my shirt with an apologetic smile on his face.

'I'm sorry', he mouthed.

I kissed him.

'Not your fault', I whispered.

'Em, wait,' he called out, 'Let me get Bella something more comfortable to wear and we'll come with you.'

Remembering our kitchen encounter and looking forward to repeating it and continuing on that course, I walked into Edward's room, but stopped dead in my tracks.

Because there, right in front of me, on his desk chair, was Edward, straddled by none other than Victoria, who was grinding on him with wild abandon.

I knew it! How could I have been so blind? Lying to myself, telling myself he was different with me… It was too good to be true.

I was still frozen on the spot, shock evident on my face. I don't know how long I had been standing there. Long enough for Edward to push Victoria off him and make his way over to me. The bitch actually had the nerve to look at me with an evil grin that communicated both pity and pride... I was trying damn hard not to kill her right then and there.

_Relax, B, don't embarrass yourself even more._

Ew. Her lipstick was everywhere! On his mouth, streaked to his cheeks, on his neck, his ear... And what a disgusting shade of hooker-red. What wasn't tacky about her? Certainly not the fake leather leggings with the white strapless piece of fabric paired with a push up bra, patent leather belt and stilettos. I had asked him before and he had denied it then, but now I wondered...Was this the kind of girl he liked? Was I nothing but a game, a toy, a conquest?

I tried to read his expression; it looked like… shame, guilt, regret…? I couldn't decipher it. But then again, I couldn't even comprehend my own emotions, how was I supposed to understand his?

The shock wore off quickly enough, though. I mean, it's not like this had been an improbability, nagging away in the back of my mind. Edward was who he was. No, the shock left about as quickly as it came. In its place came anger. And pain. But I wouldn't show the latter. Anger would have to suffice.

He reached out his hands to me, as if he wanted to stop me, or hold me. He opened his mouth to speak, but I didn't give him the chance.

'I so don't need this', I hissed and stormed out of his room, past Alice, who stood there, stunned silent.

'B, wait!', I heard Edward call as he came running after me, 'Let me explain!'

'Leave me alone!' I screeched.

Yes. Screeched. I had let go of all dignity and I didn't care. I just had to get out of there. I also really didn't care that I didn't know where to go or how to get there. All I knew was that I didn't want to see Edward. Never thought I'd say that, but in this moment, it was the truth.

After a couple of blocks I was about to call Emmett, when I heard him call my name. He didn't even ask what had happened.

'Get in,' he said, 'it'll be okay.'

I looked at him questioningly.

'Alice called.'

Oh.

'I'm taking you home.'

I wasn't too keen on that. I mean, I could hardly confide in Renee about what was going on without forcing her to lie to Charlie afterwards.

'To my place,' Emmett clarified, 'I already called mom to tell her you're not feeling well and ask if it was okay you spend the night.'

Good. At least now I could crawl into my bed and cry myself to sleep.


	30. It's not real until you feel pain

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer and Summit own. I just play.**

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**30. ****It's not real until you feel pain**

This was one of the best moments of my day: knowing I was about to see her again. Not as good as actually seeing her, of course, but the anticipation always got me on edge. It didn't matter what I was doing or where I was, it always got better knowing it wouldn't be long before I was with her again.

I admit, when viewed objectively, it might have been a little obsessive, but I didn't care. This girl… she had entered my life and made it infinitely better. I wanted to spend every minute of every day with her. And so far, I was succeeding nicely at that. Of course we had to be careful and take some precautions because of her father, but we were together as much as possible.

School had let out half an hour ago, so Alice and Bella were due home any minute. She had texted me throughout the day, getting me all worked up already. I was trying to work on a paper, killing time until she would get here, but I was too jittery with anticipation.

Thoughts of our times together popped up in my head, distracting me; meeting her at that party almost two months ago, our steamy encounter in the kitchen last week… our first date… seeing her here with Alice when she had just moved here… exploring each other's bodies… when she agreed to be my girlfriend, Halloween, Thanksgiving…

I couldn't wait to keep her from her homework just a little while longer…

'Hey, hot stuff', a sultry voice suddenly whispered in my ear.

I hadn't even heard her come in. Either she had moved ever so stealthily, or I had been so engrossed in my own thoughts and memories that I had subconsciously blocked out my surroundings completely.

I tried turning my desk chair around so I could kiss her, but she stopped me and instead covered my eyes with her hand.

_Okay, my girl wants to play. I'm up for that._

She climbed onto my lap and pressed her body against mine.

'Guess who', she breathed, then kissed me.

This was… different. I wasn't sure I liked the way she was kissing me. It was much stickier than I was used to, like she had recently slathered on excess amounts of lip gloss, and she was using far too much tongue… What was she up to? Also, her scent was off. I had grown accustomed to her sweet, subtle perfume. Now, she was practically drenched in something a lot heavier, assaulting my nostrils. I didn't like it. Yet, somehow, in the back of my mind, it triggered a long subdued memory.

As I processed all of this, my stomach began to tighten in knots and bile rose in my throat, a sickening understanding dawning on me. I reluctantly opened my eyes to have my suspicions confirmed.

It was Victoria, rubbing herself on me. Not Bella. Shit! How did she get in here?

I tried to get up and push her off me, but she had her legs wrapped around me and continued her slobbering.

'Come on, baby,' she cooed, 'you know you want this.'

Uhm, most definitely _not_.

'I can give you everything that _she_ can't', she continued while licking my neck.

_Another STD? No thanks, that first round of gonorrhea was more than enough._

I couldn't even fathom being with anyone but Bella anymore. The mere thought of doing anything with Victoria was nauseating at best.

'Stop it, Vic', I groaned, and not in a good way.

I had forgotten how much strength she carried in her legs. To think I had once been intrigued by that… I grabbed her roughly by her hips, making her squeal in delight, and tried to extricate myself from her clutches.

That's when I saw her.

Bella. Standing in my door.

Shock written all over her face. Pain evident in her eyes.

And I knew what she was seeing, and how it would appear to her.

This was fucked up beyond words and I needed to fix it. Right the fuck now!

I wanted to take her in my arms, comfort her, reassure her… but when I reached out for her, she rejected me.

'I so don't need this,' she seethed, then stormed off.

I followed after her, begging her to let me explain, but she yelled at me to leave her alone. She stumbled down the stairs and a strangled sob broke out of her chest.

Crap, I had made her cry. This whole situation was rapidly escalating and I felt myself nearing the last of my control. How the fuck had this happened?

Alice was standing in the hallway, stunned silent by the commotion, looking from me to Bella's retreating form and back, her eyes finally coming to rest on Victoria, who sidled up behind me. The bitch had an arrogant smirk plastered on her face which I was dying to wipe off, preferably by force. However, I had been raised a gentleman – aside from my previous fucking around and my predilection for coarse language – and that included never laying a violent hand on a woman.

_Though this chick is a pathetic example of a woman…_

I clenched my hands into fists at my side, trying to reign in my flaring temper. Alice stopped me before I could do either of two things warring in my mind; giving Victoria a piece of my mind or rushing after Bella.

'Edward, stay,' she said, 'you'll only make it worse if you follow after her now.'

I turned around, ready to sarcastically ask her what to do instead, but she cut me off with a furious rant.

'I can't believe you would do this t her! What did she ever do to deserve this?' she shrieked.

In the meantime, Victoria continued her act, sliding up against my back, her hand reaching into my crotch. Alice gaped at her flagrant groping. I didn't want my sister to think any worse of me, especially when I had done nothing wrong, nor did I want to suffer being molested by the slut for another second longer, so I grabbed Victoria's wrist tightly, possibly exerting a little too much force – but she had it coming – and removed her hands from my body. I didn't even get hard at the friction she had caused, I was _that _disgusted with her.

'Get your filthy hands off me', I growled.

She pouted, probably thinking it would make her look innocent and seductive, but it only made her appear tackier in my opinion. Trying to lace my voice with as much venom as I could put into it, I let her have it.

'You backstabbing little slut,' I bit at her, 'I don't care how you got here, but if you don't get the fuck away from me and out of my house, I swear, you'll be the first female I'll ever lay a hand on. You're only good for one thing, and I'm not interested in that. You're a whore, Victoria, and you disgust me. The fact that you're here, throwing yourself at me, only serves to prove that. You're lucky my sister's here now and I don't want to scare her, but if you _ever_ come near me or my girlfriend again, I cannot guarantee your safety. Get. The fuck. Out!'

My voice had steadily risen in volume as I was speaking and I was towering over her. She looked appropriately intimidated by my threat, because as soon as I had finished she rushed out the door, starting with a little yelp and squeak.

Good riddance.

'What _was_ that?' Alice asked.

'I have to find Bella, fix it…' I mumbled, resuming my path toward the front door.

'Wait, Edward,' Alice interrupted, holding me back, 'I don't think she'll listen to you right now. Let me call Emmett.'

She quickly made the call, telling Emmett that his sister was upset and providing general directions as to where she could have run off to, then told Rosalie I would be coming over.

I hoped this would give Bella enough time to calm down.

'What the hell happened?' Rosalie asked as she let me into the apartment, 'Bella is really upset and I've never seen Emmett this worried…'

'Victoria', was my answer.

Her eyes widened and she shook her head knowingly.

'What did the skank do this time?'

I quickly explained what had happened, and also told her about the relentless flirting I had been enduring. Well, it was actually bordering on harassment.

'I hope Em will let you explain…' Rosalie said.

There wasn't really much I could do about that now, except wait for Emmett's return, hopefully with Bella. I really hoped I would be able to explain the situation and fix this. Waiting for that was the hard part. When they got here, at least I would know where I stood.

Rosalie got up to get us a drink and while she was in the kitchen, I heard the key turning in the lock.

I had barely risen from my seat when Emmett burst through the door, jumping at me and knocking me to the ground. I was so caught off guard by this – the guy may be big and brawly, but he was agile – that I didn't even register the impact, nor had I seen if Bella had been with him. As his fist connected with my face, he started yelling at me. I couldn't make much sense of his rant, seeing as I not only felt his blows, but also heard them, and was trying to get him off me – a sheer impossible task, given his build and the fact he was sitting on top of me – while both Bella and Rosalie screamed in shock and were trying to break us apart. I did, however, catch the gist of it: I had corrupted his little sister and deserved to die for hurting her.

Finally, Bella managed to pull Emmett's arm back, making him pause his hits long enough for her to reason with him. He grudgingly released me and we both got to our feet. I was grateful that she had saved me from his assault, but when I started to apologize to Bella and offer her the explanation she deserved, she rounded on me and slapped me across the face. Compared to her brother's beating I barely felt it, but the meaning behind it stung more than my blackened eye, bruised jaw and split lip put together.

'How could you do this to me?' she cried.

'Bella, I…' I started, but she wouldn't let me finish.

'Don't!' she yelled. 'I can't even…'

Then she turned and ran into her bedroom, slamming the door.


	31. The truth hurts, but lies worse

**A/N I've said it before, and I'll say it again: I own lots of stuff, but Stephenie Meyer and Summit own Twilight, the characters and the franchise. I just like to play with them in my mind and**** enjoy sharing what comes out of that with you guys.**

**Thnx to the ladies I've WC'd with while working on this update. And extra thnx to Littlestar300 and miss_rebecca12 for pre-reading.**

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**31. The truth hurts, but lies worse**

Emmett kept glaring at me as I rubbed the sore spots on my face, but before any one of us could speak up, Rosalie took charge.

'Sit down,' she ordered Emmett. 'And hear him out. You're blaming the wrong person. I'll go get you some ice for your face, Edward.'

Emmett huffed. 'Well, I'm _really_ curious how you're gonna talk yourself out of this one, _Eddie._ My sister's devastated and all signs point to you as the heartbreaker. What happened to keeping _Sexward_ in the past?'

Rosalie emerged from the kitchen with a towel full of ice, then excused herself to check on Bella.

'It was Victoria', I sighed, wincing as I put the freezing towel to my face.

'I already knew that, ass hat. Bella saw you sucking face with her. What the hell?'

'That's not what happened, Em, please, let me explain.'

'This'd better be good', he scoffed.

I resisted rolling my eyes at his attitude; there was no use in further angering him. I wasn't sure if I could take a second round of his upper body strength.

'Come on, Em, you _know_ she's been harassing me!'

'Should've thought of that before you stuck your dick in her', he muttered.

'I know, alright! And I regret ever laying eyes on the bitch. But I can't change that, can I? How many times do I have to tell you that I'm in love with your sister? What do I have to do to prove to you that I'm dedicated to Bella?'

'Here's a thought: don't fuck someone else?'

'Em, please! It wasn't like that! I was at home, expecting _Bella_ to get there after school. Then someone put their hands over my eyes and started whispering in my ear. How was I to know that wasn't Bella? She wouldn't let me see. I realized the second she started kissing me that it wasn't her, and I was trying to get away from her, but she was on top of me, man! And by then Bella had gotten home and walked in on us. I swear, I'd never do that to her! Least of all with _Victoria_.'

I nearly hurled at the mention of that name.

'For real?'

'YES!'

'Damn. She's even more vile than I thought…'

I sighed in relief. Part one of the crisis seemed averted.

'Did you know she's been fucking that guy James, from the gym?'

'No kidding?'

'Really. I heard they've actually gone at it _at_ the gym, in the locker room. The guy from reception…'

'Riley?'

'Yeah, him. He said they were also caught on camera. Said she put on quite a show.'

'Yeah, she likes being watched…'

Emmett guffawed, obviously remembering my tales of her tendencies. We had run the risk of getting caught on more than one occasion. I still couldn't believe I had let myself get carried away like that with her. Well, I guess I didn't really care about that back then; the only thing on my mind had been finding temporary relief and I was foolishly believing my promiscuity would somehow prove my masculinity.

I groaned at the memory, hating myself for having it bite me in the ass now. Then I remembered what else Emmett had just said.

'So, this guy James, she's still seeing him?'

He snickered. 'His dick, mostly, from what I've heard.'

'Then why did she try to seduce _me_?'

He shrugged. 'I don't know. The bitch's crazy… Hey! We should probably tell him about today.'

'Whatever.'

I couldn't care less about her 'relationship' with some other guy. I just wanted her out of my life.

Rosalie emerged from Bella's room, closing the door quietly.

'How is she?' Emmett and I asked simultaneously.

'She calmed down a bit, but she's still really upset. Edward, I think she needs to hear the truth from you.'

I looked from her to Emmett, who nodded at me to go ahead.

_Seeking permission to check on your own girlfriend?_

Well, her brother _had_ just beaten me up pretty badly…

I knocked on her door and waited a couple of breaths before I opened it and peeked inside.

'Bella?' I asked.

No answer.

The lamp on her bedside table was casting a soft glow and I could make out her form on the bed, curled up on her side and hugging her pillow. I gingerly sat down next to her and touched her shoulder. She didn't flinch. At least that was some improvement, compared to earlier.

'Bella?' I asked again.

She exhaled a shaky breath before finally speaking.

'Is it true, what Rose said?'

This was it. I had to tell her everything. I thought I had done so that night we ran into Victoria at the bowling alley, thinking then that it couldn't get any worse, but somehow I found myself explaining the situation once more. On the one hand, I was terribly anxious about this, but on the other hand I knew I wasn't the one in the wrong here.

'What did she tell you?'

She sat up, leaning against the headboard, pulling her knees up to her chest and wrapping her arms around them.

'Basically, that Victoria set you up, trying to drive a wedge between us. And that she's been bothering you. A lot.'

I nodded. 'She's right. I don't know what's wrong with the girl, but I did _not_ betray you. She just showed up and caught me by surprise. What you saw was me trying to get her off me. Please, Bella, you have to believe me. I would never do that to you.'

I wasn't above begging at this point, whatever it took to regain her trust and take away her pain. I moved closer, reaching out and grabbing both of her hands in one of mine.

'Please, Bella,' I repeated on a whisper.

I kept holding on to her hands as if they were a lifeline, and, to be honest, they kind of were. I couldn't lose her. Least of all over this. I was so conflicted; hoping beyond hope she would forgive me, but at the same time not thinking myself worthy of her and her trust and forgiveness. Slowly, the seconds passed, and the only sound to be heard was our breathing. Then, after what felt like hours, she moved forward, sitting on her knees in front of me on the bed, and gently brushed her hand along the side of my face.

'Em beat you up pretty badly, didn't he?'

I shrugged. 'If that's what it takes to prove to him how serious I am about you, I'll take it.'

'I'm sorry,' she said.

Why was _she_ apologizing to _me_? It should be the other way around.

'Don't…' I started, but was cut off by her kiss.

'Does that mean you'll forgive me?' I asked when she released my lips.

'There's nothing to forgive. I believe you, Edward. It was stupid of me to think you'd be so heartless. I'm so...'

This time, I cut _her_ off with a kiss. She shouldn't apologize for something she had absolutely no part in.

Not breaking the kiss, I pulled her sideways onto my lap, and she wrapped her arms around my neck, deepening our kiss. She was still crying a little, but she didn't seem as distraught as before. We continued kissing for a while, just holding each other, until I finally pulled back, needing to ask her this one question. Leaning my forehead against hers, I tucked a loose strand of hair behind her ear and sighed deeply, before speaking.

'Why was it so easy for you to believe I was with Vi…' we both cringed a little at the mention of the bitch that nearly ruined everything. 'Her?'

'Because it doesn't make sense for you to be with me,' she sniffled.

Was she absolutely insane?

'Look at me, I'm just… me. When you could be with any number of confident, sexy, experienced _women_, you're with me. A plain high school girl. I wear a fucking uniform, for crying out loud! What do I have to offer?'

Obviously, she didn't see herself clearly. At all. I put my finger to her lips in an attempt to silence her. She shouldn't sell herself short like that. Not on my watch.

'B, you're all I see anymore.'

It was probably bordering on insanity, how much I needed her in my life.

'You occupy every thought in my head.'

She looked up at me with tear-filled eyes.

'You promise me?' she whispered.

'I swear, on… my sister's virginity, that…'

'I wouldn't swear on that anymore,' Bella muttered.

What?

'Shit…' she whispered, and turned to me, wide-eyed.

'Are you saying…' I started.

'You didn't find out from me,' she said defensively. 'I promised Alice I wouldn't. Shit, it just slipped out.'

'Jazz? And… my _little_ sister?'

I was gaping at Bella, but I couldn't help myself. This was pretty huge news.

Bella rolled her eyes. 'Come on, Edward, don't act so shocked. For one, they've been dating for as long as we have, and you said it yourself: they've been in love with each other for much longer. Second, he's your best friend. You _know_ he's a good guy. He _loves_ her! And third, do you now get Emmett's reaction?'

She was right. Of course she was. I couldn't dwell on that for long, though.

'Besides, that's so not the point,' she continued. 'I don't need you to swear on anything. Just… don't hurt me like that again, okay?'

'I'd rather die,' I said sincerely and kissed her once more. 'Oh, and Bella, the _fucking_ uniform? It's exactly that,' I told her, my eyes roaming over her appearance appreciatively, while she blushed. 'Baby, you look hot in it!'

I didn't give her time to respond, because, quite frankly, she didn't need to answer. I just wanted her to feel wanted, desired, as she was.

Before we could take our making up any further, there was a knock on the door.

'Bella, Edward?' Rosalie asked. 'We just ordered take-out. It'll be here in about twenty.'

Bella got up from my lap and opened the door a little.

'Hey, Rose, thanks, we'll be right out.'

After a hushed conversation – Rosalie was probably also checking how we were doing - she closed the door again and turned around.

'I'll just change out of this uniform. Stay, please?'

The way she looked at me when she asked to me she wasn't just referring to dinner.

'Where else am I gonna go?' I replied.

I examined the pictures on her wall – one of her and Emmett; another one with Alice, Angela and Jessica; one of our group; and one of the two of us, sneakily taken by Alice a couple of weeks ago – to give her some privacy while she put on a pair of sweatpants and a U-Prep hoodie.

'You can turn around now,' she giggled. 'I don't mind you watching me change. You've seen more than that.'

That was true, but I still preferred it this way. She should be treated with nothing but the utmost respect, and averting my eyes while she was changing was part of that.

I merely smiled at her and took her hand, leading her back toward the living room. Emmett was eyeing us warily, obviously still not entirely sure about the situation – but who could really blame him for that after what had happened? Bella released my hand and walked over to her brother, enveloping him in a hug and whispering words of thanks in his ear. After all, even though I got the brunt of it, his actions came out of love and concern for his little sister. If I had been in his position, I would have done the same thing.

We took a seat on the couch and Bella purposely leaned in close to me, putting my arm around her shoulders. Rosalie handed us both a carton from the nearby Greek restaurant. I tried balancing my portion on my knee and using my free hand to eat, but that didn't quite work and I nearly dropped my dinner onto the couch. Bella wouldn't give me my arm back, though instead instructing me to hold my carton while she fed me. I hugged her closer to me and kissed her in between bites, communicating my appreciation of her sweet gesture.

'No homework?' Emmett asked after we had finished eating.

'Nope. Already did it at school. Want to watch a movie?'

Deciding on _Sleepy Hollow_, we settled back into our seats. When the end credits started rolling on the flat screen, Bella turned to her brother.

'Is it okay if Edward spends the night?'

Emmett started spluttering objections at her request, but she interrupted him.

'We won't _do_ anything, I promise. Geez. I just don't want to sleep alone tonight. Please?'

'Sweetie,' Rosalie offered. 'I don't see any harm in it. You can trust Bells in this, you know that. And Eddie here won't be _that_ stupid.'

He sighed, 'Fine. But I don't want to hear any sex noises tonight!'

Pulling me to my feet, Bella smiled brightly at her brother, thanking him. I nodded, waving goodnight, and followed her into her room.

She closed and locked the door behind me and moved toward me slowly yet deliberately, pulling the hoodie over her head.

'I'm going to change for bed and I don't want you to turn around this time. Understood?'

'Bella, you don't have to…'

'Yes, I do, and I want to. I _want_ you to look at me.'

This felt so weird, having her undress in front of me. Don't get me wrong, this demanding, more confident side of her was sexy as hell, but I didn't want her to do this out of a false sense of necessity. I'd said it before: she should feel nothing but cherished. I wasn't going to stand by idly while she bared herself to me, in more ways than one.

'Then let me help you,' I said, moving closer and stopping her from taking off the rest of her clothes.

I kind of understood where she was coming from; if it had been the other way around, I would have felt the need to reaffirm our physical relationship, too. But I didn't want her to push her boundaries because of it. If or when we would take that step, I wanted her to do so because she wanted it for herself, not out of fear, hurt or insecurity.

'Where are your pajamas?' I asked, to which she pointed at the dresser.

'Second drawer.'

'Stay here,' I ordered softly. 'Don't move.'

She complied, her features softening, the raging fire in her eyes turning into a slow burn.

Taking out a camisole top and a pair of shorts, I returned to my spot in front of her. I took her hand and guided her over to her bed. Holding both her hands in mine, I looked at her intently, leaning in to plant a soft kiss on her lips before speaking.

'I'm not going to take your virginity tonight. Not like this. You were so upset before… and, you know, Emmett…'

She frowned.

'Baby, I just want it to be special for you. For both of us. Like this, right now, won't be that. Especially when Em will beat me up again afterwards.'

That made her giggle, before she pouted again. I knew exactly how she was feeling, because I felt it too. I wanted her, badly. We had been so close the week before and I was very impatient about being able to convey my feelings for her in every way possible. But it felt completely wrong doing that for the first time in her brother's home. I wanted her in _my_ room, in _my_ bed, where I could make sure she would be as comfortable as possible. I wanted to be able to lock my door, set the mood, shower her with attention, make the experience perfect.

Sighing at her disappointed expression, I pulled her into an embrace, kissing her temple.

'Tonight, let me just hold you, okay B?'

She nodded and tilted her head up to kiss me. Taking that as my cue, I let my hands trail down her back to her sweatpants, lingering on her firm butt for a moment before hooking my fingers in the waistband. I slowly tugged them down her legs, getting on my knees in the process. Bella placed her hands on my shoulders for support as I lifted one foot, then the other, tossing the sweatpants aside. I then reached for the shorts I had laid out on her bed, motioning for her to step into them, then pulling them up while getting back on my feet, ending the circuit with another kiss.

She reached for my shirt, intent on taking it off, but I stopped her.

'Let me do this for you, please,' I said softly.

She dropped her hands to her side, but I wouldn't let her face slip back into a pout, instead kissing her again. In the meantime, I slowly pulled her tank top up and over her head, Bella lifting her arms to accommodate me. Apparently, she had taken her bra off when she changed out of her uniform earlier, and my eyes lingered on her chest for a moment, before I picked up the camisole and helped her put it on.

'There, all done,' I whispered.

Bella was biting her lip again in that adorable nervous habit of hers, except that she didn't appear to be nervous at all right now, as she once more moved her hands to the hem of my shirt. They disappeared underneath, fire igniting from her touch, and she started to push it further up. She was nearly frantic in trying to take it off and I had to bite back a chuckle as she struggled getting the shirt over my head. Once she succeeded, she flung it across the room and attacked my mouth in a hungry kiss, her hands roaming over my chest as I held onto her. She then got to work on my belt and buttons, pushing my jeans over my hips and letting gravity take over. I had taken off my shoes during the movie, so I quickly stepped out of my jeans and pulled off my socks, leaving me in my underwear.

Being this close to her, both of us barely dressed, kissing and touching, had already had a physical effect on me. I'm not going to lie: I was hard as a rock. This didn't go unnoticed by Bella, and she reached down to palm me through my underwear. Out of reflex I moved against her hand. I mean, what guy in his right mind wouldn't? But when she tried to slip her hand inside, I reluctantly pulled back an took her wrist, moving her hand to my lips and kissing her knuckles.

'Bella, please,' I groaned. 'Don't make this any harder for me than it already is. You don't know how this is torturing me! I'm trying to do right by you… Please, just let me hold you tonight.'

'I'm sorry,' she sighed. 'I don't mean to, I just can't seem to resist. But you're right, though. I should… get into bed.'

She started to move away from me, but I didn't want to relinquish our proximity, so I pulled her flush against me.

'Who said anything about letting go of you?' I whispered huskily and kissed her again.

I picked her up and gently laid her down on the bed, not breaking our connection, pulling the covers around us.

We spent a significant amount of time kissing, tangled together in her bed. After a while I could tell she was getting sleepy, so I settled back, wrapping my arms around her. As she was drifting off, she rolled over onto her side, pulling me with her. I curled my body around hers and she melted into my embrace, sighing contentedly.

Suddenly, I was wide awake again, acutely aware of her soft form in my arms, drifting off to sleep. I was holding her in my arms, knowing she chose to be with me. Trusting me. Forgiving me. Accepting me.

And then it hit me. I couldn't imagine my life without her anymore. She was completely embedded into my existence.

I loved her.

Wow.

I loved Bella.

It took a couple of minutes for the profoundness of this realization to really settle into my mind. This feeling was new to me. My first instinct was to freak out over it. But the fear I was expecting never came. Instead, I felt oddly at ease, knowing the true extent of my feelings.

Once my jumbled thoughts settled again, I couldn't wait to share my revelation with her. I knew she was almost asleep now, but I didn't want to wait until morning. But I also hated to wake her up. The day had been so trying on her. So I just nuzzled her hair, softly kissed her shoulder, and whispered in her ear.

'Bella, I love you.'

She froze and I could tell she was holding her breath. For an infinite moment, I worried this might have been too soon and she would push me away.

But before my panic could take over and would make me start thinking of a way out of yet another mess, she leaned back against me and started breathing again. She then took my right hand from around her waist, moving it up to her lips and softly kissing my fingers and palm before moving our joined hands back to her waist.

I could have felt dejected at this, not having her verbally respond to my revelation. But – and this was the more important part – she had forgiven me for the whole clusterfuck that was today _and_ she didn't reject me.

She just wasn't ready yet.

And it was okay.

We were okay.

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***comes out of hiding* So… crisis averted. At least this one. Let me now how I did, please. Reviews are as appreciated as snuggling in bed with Edward…**


	32. Fine, fresh, fierce

**A/N As usual, here's a quick reminder that I don't own anything Twilight, except my own copies of the books and DVDs and an embarrassingly large collection of pics... This story, however, does sprout from my own mind.

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**32. Fine, fresh, fierce**

I woke up feeling uncharacteristically warm and with an unfamiliar weight on top of me. Sorting through my still hazy thoughts and memories it took me a moment or two to recall the situation I was in and how I had gotten there. Once I remembered, though, I felt a happy grin taking over my face.

Edward was holding me tight, lying partially on top of me. He had stayed the night. This was something I could get used to. I made a mental note to ask Emmett and Rosalie if we could work this into our agreement for my sleepovers.

For the moment, however, as much as I enjoyed the feel of Edward all around me, I also really needed to go to the bathroom. Edward, even in his sleeping state, seemed adamant at keeping me exactly where I was, though, as he tightened his grip on me.

_Fine, a couple of minutes more can't hurt_, I thought, and allowed him to pull me even closer.

He was slowly waking up now, too. The hard bulge pressed against my ass was my first clue. His increasingly more deliberately roaming hands were the second. And when he buried his face in my hair and sighed my name, I almost gave in. I mean, I had been all but begging him last night, but he wouldn't give in then. And while I understood his reasons to deny me, I was still more than ready to take the next step with him.

Especially after his confession when we went to bed.

Edward Cullen loved me.

It still baffled me.

Not that he could feel that way about me, mind you. He had made it pretty clear in his actions that he was serious about me and would do just about anything for me – hell, he had let Emmett beat him up to prove that point. But how he could be so sure of it… I was still trying to wrap my head around being so in love with him that he was in my every thought. Could that be love? I wasn't sure yet. Or, at least, I wasn't ready to say it. Maybe it was because of what had happened the day before, with Victoria. Maybe it was because we still had to sneak around somewhat. Anyway, I wasn't there yet. I just hoped he would stick around and wait for me to get there.

I turned my head in search of his lips and got lost in his scent that was so... _Edward._ I knew inherently that this would always be home to me. Right here, in his arms.

_That's what love feels like, Bella,_ my inner voice whispered knowingly.

I shrugged it off, not wanting to ruin the moment by freaking out over it.

Rolling me over, he tangled his left hand in my hair, locking me in place, while his right hand made its way under my tank top. He reached my breast and started to manipulate my nipple as I hitched my leg over his hip and ground myself against his morning erection. The dual sensation further woke him up and he flipped me onto my back, pinning me against the mattress, his hips picking up a steady rhythm. Unfortunately, the added pressure wasn't very helpful in matters of bladder control, so after just a few moments I had to pull back, announcing my unrelenting need to pee. Edward offered me barely enough room to wiggle out from underneath him and as soon as I had gotten up he collapsed back onto the bed with a groan.

He looked so adorable, spread eagle in my small double bed with his face buried in my purple pillow, I giggled as I closed the door behind me.

At the same time, Emmett emerged from his bedroom. He was always a little grumpy upon waking, but when he saw me he frowned even more. I could only imagine what was going through his mind at the thought of his little sister in bed with his best friend. I appreciated his concern and protectiveness, but at some point, preferably soon, he would have to overcome his apprehension. I rolled my eyes at him.

'Relax, big brother, I'm still the only virgin in this house.'

_For now_, I added as an afterthought.

'Yeah, yeah,' he waved dismissively. 'Just promise me you'll tell me when you're ready. I don't want to risk walking in on you guys.'

I nodded, deciding not to tell him he was already somewhat cockblocking me, happy he seemed to be coming around, and hurried into the bathroom.

When I returned to my room, Edward had rolled onto his back, the sheets tangled around his legs, leaving his upper body unobstructed from my view. My mouth went a little dry at the sight and I fidgeted in the doorway. Not for long, though, as I was a woman on a mission. You see, Edward may still have been worried about pushing my boundaries when it came to sex; that didn't mean we couldn't do anything. Especially after the beating he had taken by the hands of my brother.

Silently, I made my way over to the bed, glancing at the alarm clock to learn there was still an hour left before I needed to leave for school. I crawled up my bed, being careful not to stir Edward just yet, and examined his features for a moment or two. He hadn't shaved in a few days, creating the perfect amount of scruff on his jaw. His chiseled chest was rhythmically rising and falling with his sleeping breaths. The muscles of his abs flexed a little as I trailed my hands gingerly over them, tickling his happy trail.

I gasped as my eyes fell upon a large bruise forming on his lower ribcage. What the hell? How much force had Emmett actually used? Resisting the urge to touch it, afraid of causing him discomfort, I quickly scanned his body for any more damage. True enough, I located another bruise, disguised as a shadow in the scruff on his jaw, as well as the beginnings of a black eye and a cut on his lip.

'Poor baby,' I whispered, and softly traced my fingers along the bruises covering his skin.

Feeling he was in need of some special attention, I acted on bold instinct and carefully moved down his side, untangling the sheet from his legs, brushing my hands along his legs in the process. I could make out the contours of his semi through the fabric of his boxers and out of reflex I licked my lips. I hooked my fingers in his waistband and gently pulled his underwear down a little so he was partially exposed. Edward mumbled something incoherently and scratched his butt. I stifled a giggle and used the opportunity to pull his boxers further down.

There was just enough room for me to sit between his legs, so I got on my knees and made myself comfortable. I would have liked to take my time in worshiping his masculinity, but, knowing we really needed to get up soon, I settled for giving him a nice wake up call.

Placing my hands on his hips, I leaned forward and placed a few kisses on his happy trail, before licking his length from base to tip, noticing it swell at my touch. He wasn't fully erect yet, so I decided this would be the perfect moment to provide him with a stimulating visual. I gently took him in my right hand, stroking his inner thigh with my left, and teasingly called out his name. When his sleepy eyes settled on me, I took his entire cock in my mouth, my bottom lip touching his balls. He reacted instantly, eyes bugging out, mouth popping open and his cock growing larger and harder in my mouth, almost making me gag. I remembered a little trick Jessica had told me about and, combined with deep breaths through my nose, I was almost able to hold the position, only moving back a little bit. A string of expletives left his lips when I winked and swallowed around him, then started working him in earnest, licking and sucking him like a popsicle. After I started massaging his balls, it wasn't long before I felt him tense up and hot spurts shot down my throat.

I licked him clean and neatly tucked him back into his boxers. Edward grabbed my arms and yanked me up his body, claiming my lips in a hungry kiss.

'Wow, Bella, that was…'

'Good morning,' I giggled.

'Definitely,' he smirked, obviously satisfied with my efforts.

He kissed me again and moved his hand to my shorts, his intentions clear.

'Sorry, babe,' I said, taking his hand and bringing it up to my lips to kiss his fingers. 'As much as I'd love to stay in bed with you all day, I have school today.'

He gave me the most adorable pout and I quickly kissed it, before continuing.

'Besides, you don't need to reciprocate. This was something I wanted to do for you.'

I got out of bed and gathered some clean underwear and my uniform.

'I'm going to get ready. Rosalie is making some breakfast, so I'll see you in the kitchen in a bit.'

Showered and dressed, I walked into the kitchen. I had opted out of washing my hair – to save time and because it was still clean enough to last the day – instead braiding it back, ending in a loose bun.

'Bella!' Rosalie said cheerfully. 'Morning, sweetie. Feeling better?'

I nodded in response, smiling.

'What do you want for breakfast? I've got cereal and stuff right here, but if you want, I can whip up some pancakes or bacon and eggs…'

'Cereal is fine, Rose,' I replied, waving her off.

I took a bowl and filled it with the Kellogg's red fruit cereal, then poured some yoghurt over it, topping it of with a spoonful of honey. Yummy. Then, instead of taking a seat at the table, I plopped down on Edward's lap, wrapping my arms around his neck and snuggling close, breathing in his scent. He immediately snaked his arms around my waist and kissed the top of my head. He then proceeded to feed me my breakfast, a reversal of dinner last night.

'Are you ready to go?' Edward asked when I was finished.

'Yeah, just let me get my bag.'

'I got it,' he said and disappeared to my room.

After rinsing my bowl and putting it in the dishwasher, I walked over to my brother and surprised him with a big bear hug – well, as big a hug as I could give.

'Thanks, Em,' I whispered in his ear.

His muscular arms enveloped me and he squeezed me in response. He may have overreacted about the whole Victoria situation, but he meant well, only trying to protect and defend me.

When we got to school Alice wasn't there yet, so we waited in the parking lot for a while. During the wait, I called Renee to let her know I was feeling better and I'd be home after school.

'Come with me?' I asked Edward when I had hung up. 'Charlie is out of town on business and I'm sure Renee would love to see you again. Please?'

I batted my lashes for added effect.

'Sure, B, I'll pick you up after school then. Oh, Alice is here,' he said as he glanced over my shoulder.

She was standing outside the Volvo's door. I barely managed to unbuckle my seatbelt when she opened the door and practically pulled me from my seat, hugging me with all her strength.

'Oh Bella, how are you, honey? I'm so sorry about yesterday! I swear, I didn't know. Did Emmett find you alright? Oh my god, I can't even begin to imagine what you were going through. If it had been Jazz…'

'Alice… can't… breathe…' I choked out, interrupting her rant.

For such a petite girl, she sure was strong. Or maybe it was due to her excitement and emotions. I didn't mind that much, it was just the way she was, but I still preferred not to have my oxygen flow cut off.

'Oops, sorry,' she giggled. 'You're okay, though, right?'

I nodded as Edward made his way around the car, putting a possessive arm around me.

'Oh my, what happened to your face, Eddie?' Alice shrieked.

'Emmett went into big brother overdrive,' he shrugged. 'But we talked and it's alright now. No worries. Look, I've got to run by the house before class.'

He turned to me and cupped my face in his hands.

'I'll see you after school, baby. I love you.'

He didn't wait for me to answer, maybe sensing it would make me uncomfortable, and leaned down quickly to kiss me one more time before he got back into his car and drove off. I turned to Alice, only to find her gaping at me.

'What?' I asked.

'He told you he loves you?' she asked, her voice going up about an octave.

I shrugged, starting to make my way to the building, Alice hurrying after me.

'Uhm… yeah. Last night, after we made up.'

'Did you…?' she asked, raising and inquisitive eyebrow.

'No!' I nearly shouted.

'But, he did spend the night, didn't he?'

I nodded. 'Because I didn't want to be alone. I actually may have tried to take it further, but he wouldn't let me. Said he wanted to do the right thing. But it was nice having him hold me.'

'Wow, he really has changed. I've never heard of him refusing sex. Damn, B, he's got it bad for you!'

'I know,' I sighed.

'So, did you say it back?'

I hesitated. My reasoning made perfect sense for me, but I wasn't sure if I could explain it so Alice would understand.

'No,' I whispered.

'What? Why not? Don't you love him?'

'It's not that, Ali, it's just… I don't know. So much has happened and… I just can't say it yet.'

She was quiet for a moment, then nodded.

'I can get that. You want to be sure when you eventually say it. But it's so sweet he said it first! I'm so happy for you!'

'Thanks. And I did show my appreciation to him this morning,' I winked at her, making her burst into a fit of giggles.

When I was about to enter the cafeteria at the start of lunch, Jessica came rushing to me with Angela in tow, their faces flushed from Gym and running across the school grounds.

'Bella, wait!' she called out to me. 'Don't go in yet!'

Curious, I turned around and waited for them to reach me.

'What's wrong?'

Glancing around, Jessica took my hand and pulled me around the corner, out of view from the other students making their way to lunch.

'Okay, so you know I have Gym with the cheerleading triad, right? So, anyway, as we were changing just now, I overheard them talking about you. Well, more about Edward, but it involves you. I wasn't trying to eavesdrop and I'm not gossiping, but I really feel you should know what they're saying about you guys.'

'What, more crap about me hooking up with him and Em?'

'No, they've long since moved on from that. Didn't stick, anyway. Okay, let me explain. Apparently, Whitney's stepsister used to hook up with Edward, like, over a year ago or something. But now she's been bragging about how Edward couldn't possibly be serious about you, because her stepsister slept with him last night. And then…'

I didn't even let her finish.

'What the hell?'

'That's what I thought,' Angela said.

'So, Victoria and Whitney are sisters?'

'Stepsisters,' Jessica specified.

'That explains the slutty similarities,' I muttered, causing both of them to snicker. 'Thanks Jess, for the heads up. Now, let's get lunch. I'm hungry.'

We met Alice and the boys at our usual table and settled down to eat. I was a little distracted from our conversation, as I was still processing what Jessica had told me. It seemed as though last night's drama wasn't completely over yet. But how was I going to end these rumors?

'Hello? Earth to Bella,' Mike waved a hand in front of my face.

'Sorry, I zoned out there for a minute. What?'

'The cheerleaders are looking our way. Again. One of them actually pointed at you just now. Thought you'd want to know.'

I turned around and sure enough, they were looking at us, obviously enjoying some joke. They weren't even hiding their gossiping. I felt anger bubbling up inside me. There was only so much I could take and this was the proverbial straw.

'Excuse me,' I said and loudly pushed my chair back, scraping it across the floor.

Surprisingly graceful, considering my usual tendency to stumble, especially when I was upset or angry, I stalked over to the table full of cheerleaders. They noticed me coming their way, but pretended to not see me when I reached them, so I cleared my throat.

'Oh, if it isn't the Swan girl,' Courtney said. 'What do you want?'

'Well,' I said, plastering on my most sickeningly sweet fake smile. 'There seems to be some lovely story going around, and I'd love to hear more about it.'

'I don't know what you're talking about,' she said.

'Maybe you don't, and I can't blame you for being a bit clueless, but Whitney is bound to know,' I replied, giving her a sympathetic smile and turning to the girl in question, who had the decency to look flustered.

'What do you mean?' she stammered.

'I'm talking about the rumors you're spreading about my boyfriend, Whit.'

She seemed to have recomposed herself, because she replied snarkily, 'Some boyfriend you've got in _Sexward_.'

'For one, that's none of your business, and second, I really don't appreciate that nickname.'

'Oh, well, then…'

'I also _really_ don't want your thoughts on that either. What I _am_ interested in, is why you think you have the right to spread rumors about us.'

She stood up, hands on her hips, and was followed closely by half the squad. No doubt an attempt to intimidate me. If it weren't for my anger still bubbling over, it might have worked.

'I get my information from a very reliable source,' she started.

'Let me guess: yea high, fake tan, dresses like Jwoww, red curly version of you a couple of years down the road...?'

'What's that supposed to mean?'

'It means, Whitney dear, that I know who your slutty sister is. Vicki, is it?'

'Oh right, yeah,' she laughed. 'She's been fucking your boy. Told me all about it over breakfast this morning. I'm surprised you hadn't noticed, but you're not the most perceptive, I guess.'

I resisted the urge to slap her across her lying face. No use in starting a fight in the school cafeteria. And she was after all just the messenger of the lies. So instead, I laughed humorlessly at the show that was put up before me.

'Wow, that's even more pathetic. I normally wouldn't even bother rectifying petty gossip, but I've had just about enough of all of you. Let me set the record straight: your sister is a slut and a liar and she'd be wise to keep her big mouth shut or wrapped around some other guy's dick. And I feel sorry for you girls, because apparently your own lives are so boring that you feel the need to entertain yourself with gossiping about mine. Sad.'

I shook my head as I turned from their dumbfounded stares and walked back to my seat, where my friends were also gaping at me in shock.

Edward was already waiting for me when I exited the Gym building. It had started raining, so I quickly said goodbye to Alice and made my way across the parking lot. When I was within reach of the Volvo, Edward opened the passenger side door from the inside, and I slid in. before I could buckle my seatbelt, he reached for me and pulled me close for a lingering kiss.

'Hi love, how was your day?'

'Fine,' I said. 'But better now that you're here.'

He frowned, 'Did something happen?'

'Nothing I can't handle. Just some stupid gossip coming from the cheerleaders. I told them off, though, so don't worry.'

'Good,' he said as his hand rubbed my leg soothingly. 'If they keep bothering you, though, you'll let me know, right?'

When I nodded, he let the subject drop. I didn't want to worry him about the gossip that was going around, because I was confident I had handled it. No need to make him fret about something that was beyond his control anyway.

'By the way, I've got something for you.'

'What? Why?'

'Does a guy need a reason to give something to his girlfriend?'

'I guess not, but I don't want you spending money on me for no reason.'

'I didn't spend a dime, I promise. And even if I did, I don't mind, because you're worth every last bit of it. Now, open the glove compartment.'

My curiosity piqued, I pulled the handle. Inside was a bundle of white and blue fabric. I noticed the school emblem on the front, and a large 1 on one of the sleeves.

'A school sports shirt?'

'No. Well, yes. But it's my old football jersey.'

I unfolded the shirt and true enough, it read _Cullen_ in large capitals across the back and also on the other sleeve.

'You're giving me your quarterback jersey?'

He nodded, smiling at me. He was obviously excited about this.

'Why?' I asked, then quickly amended my question when I saw his face fall. 'Not that I don't appreciate it, because I do. But it's just… I don't know… it's a little unexpected, you know?'

He reached over and took my hand, giving it a reassuring squeeze.

'Don't worry, I get it. I came across this in my closet a while ago and then last night it dawned on me that I'd love to see you in it. Only if you want to, of course…'

'Don't be silly, I'd love to! Thank you!'

He looked over at me again, his beautiful crooked grin gracing his face and sparkles lighting up his eyes. The sight made my heart swell with happiness. I would do whatever it took to keep that look on his face. I would wear the shirt regardless, but knowing how excited he got about it and the meaning behind it, made it that much more special to me.

'Thanks love, that means a lot to me.'

I leaned over the central console to quickly kiss his cheek, then carefully tucked the jersey into my bag.

We pulled into my driveway minutes later and after Edward ran around the car to open my door for me, we hurried inside, out of the pouring rain. I shrugged out of my trench coat and hung it, together with Edward's leather jacket, on the coat rack, next to the heater, to dry. Calling out to Renee that I was home, I lead him to the kitchen, where I knew she'd be waiting with tea.

'Hey honey, how was your day? Feeling better?' Renee greeted us. 'Oh, hi Edward. Sit down, I've just made some tea. Cookie?'

Renee's cooking left much to be desired, especially when compared to Esme's, but her baking skills were unrivaled. The chocolate chip cookies – with three kinds of chocolate – were still a little warm from the oven. Delicious.

'Thanks, mom. And yeah, I'm feeling better now. About that, though…' I started, fidgeting a little.

I wanted to confide in her, but it was a rather delicate subject, after all, and I didn't want her to get the wrong idea about Edward. She beat me to it, finally looking at him when she offered him his cup.

'Oh dear, Edward, what on earth happened to you?'

'I got into a fight with Emmett.'

She looked from Edward to me and back, obviously confused. I figured some clarifications were in order.

'Edward and I had a fight last night and Emmett got protective over me. It's all cleared up now, so you don't have to worry about it.'

'Well, I suppose that's good, then. But what caused all of this in the first place?'

I was amazed at how calm Edward seemed under the circumstances. I was feeling very uncomfortable, talking about all that mess and his past, but it seemed as though he had been expecting this line of conversation. Well, maybe he _had_; he had known we would see Renee all day. In hindsight, I could have anticipated as much.

'There was a… situation… with an old 'girlfriend', if you will,' he started explaining, emphasizing the air quotes around the term. 'She uhm…'

'The bitch thought she could trick Edward and break us up,' I finished for him.

'Bella!' Renee admonished. 'There's no need to talk like that. I'm sure the girl is…'

'No mom, I'm actually being nice in calling her a bitch. I can fill a dirty dictionary with the names I really want to call her, but I don't. She messed with us and was arrogant enough to think she could get away with it.'

By the end of my rant I was panting again in anger. Edward put his arm around my shoulder and rubbed my arm in an effort to calm me down.

'Sshh, baby, it's okay. We talked about this, right?'

I nodded and motioned for him to continue.

'So anyway, Bella got really upset and went over to Emmett's and he, of course, got mad and took a swing at me. But we talked it out and cleared things up.'

'Look mom, I'm sorry I didn't tell you this last night, but I really didn't want to bother you with this and I just…'

'You needed your brother. I understand. Really, I do. I'm glad you feel like you can tell me now, though. Are you okay?'

She walked around the table and enveloped me in a hug. After I confirmed that I was feeling better and that Edward and I had talked it out, we talked about other things. Like her lunch with Esme the previous week. Apparently, they had bonded tremendously and had another get together already scheduled. I was glad she had found a friend here. She tried not to let it show, but I knew she missed her friends from London, Sarah Black and Sue Clearwater.

Edward charmed her once again with his good manners and general politeness. And truth be told, what was not to like? But as much as I enjoyed how well he got along with Renee, I also really wanted him all to myself for a while. So after our third cup of tea, and having emptied the plate of cookies, I pushed my cup away and made to get up.

'Mom, Edward and I are going up to my room for a bit, okay?'

'Sure… I guess. But Bella, be responsible, okay?'

She gave me a stern, knowing look that made me flush in embarrassment.

'Mom! We'll be fine, I promise.'

I didn't wait for another response and hurried upstairs, Edward in tow.

'Will you be joining us for dinner?' Renee called after us, and Edward confirmed right before the door closed.

We reached my room in record time and I rushed inside, depositing my bag onto the desk. By the time I turned around, Edward had closed the door and was stalking toward me. Even though I craved his proximity, his predatorial stance and the hungry, almost feral look in his eyes made me back up instinctively. He increased his pace and crashed into me, my back meeting the closet, his lips slamming to mine, hands groping, moans escaping, the need for each other tangible. I gave in to the feeling of him, pressed against me, staking his claim on me. My leg was hitched over his hip and we were grinding shamelessly against each other. After a couple of minutes I reluctantly pulled out of the kiss, breathing heavily, as he moved to devour my neck.

'Edward,' I panted. 'I… oh my… I... I need to get out of… oh yes… this uniform.'

His movements didn't falter. He skimmed his one hand up my leg, underneath my skirt, while the other caressed my side, from my hip to my breast. He pulled my mouth back to his and kissed me again, all lips and teeth, before answering me in a voice that was both raw and demanding.

'I can help you with that.'

I opened my eyes and could barely register the wicked gleam in his, before he reached for the hem of my shirt and hastily removed both my blue t-shirt and the white long-sleeved shirt I was wearing underneath. His hands then moved to the button on my skirt, popping it, then lowering the zipper. He pulled it down while sinking to his knees, helping me step out of it. In the same motion, he removed my boots and thick woolen socks. Even though I was used to cold, rainy weather, I still tended to get cold easily, so I usually layered up in winter. I was despising that now even more, because it meant there was that much more fabric between our bodies. My leggings and tights – yes, two pairs – were next to go, leaving me in my underwear and thankful for the heating in my room, though I was sure our current activities could provided substantial warmth in themselves. Edward rose to his feet again and pulled me close once more, reclaiming my lips. He lifted me up and I wrapped my legs around his waist as he moved away from our spot against my closet. Seconds later, I was lowered onto my bed, not releasing him from my grip. He moved back a little and I sat up. He was still fully clothed and I frowned at the contrast, so I quickly started to rectify that situation. His grey hooded sweatshirt was the first item to join my clothes on the floor. I then began to unbutton the white shirt he was wearing underneath. When all the buttons were undone, I pushed it off his shoulders, letting my hands roam over his chest in the process. He was leaning over me and I reveled in his possessive posture. I raised myself up to kiss along his jaw, down his neck, making him shiver, across his chest, following his abs and happy trail until I reached the waistband of his dark jeans. But when I started to undo his button fly, he took my hands and pinned them down over my head.

'Bella,' he sighed. 'Don't get me wrong. I want this as much as you do.'

'Do you?' I challenged, because his continuing rejections were starting to undermine my confidence.

In answer, he moved his hips against mine again while cocking an eyebrow questioningly. I stifled a moan. Yeah, I guess I shouldn't have questioned his attraction to me; it was firmly pressed against my inner thigh. I couldn't push down the irrational pain I was feeling, however. I mean, here I was, offering myself to him – again – and he turned me down – again. So I turned my head in an attempt to hide my hurt expression. But he turned my head back, his eyes gazing intently into mine. I saw it in his entire expression; he hadn't meant to hurt me. My mind knew that, but my heart and body wouldn't listen.

'Then why?' I cried, tears overflowing.

He knew what I was asking.

'Because I love you,' he said, enunciating each word slowly. 'So damn much, B!'

I knew that, too, and it made me even more frustrated with myself. I knew he only wanted to do the right thing, but still, I felt so vulnerable, exposing myself both physically and emotionally. He released my wrists and I brought my arms down across my chest, reflexively trying to cover myself.

'Oh darling, please don't cry,' he begged, and wiped the tears from my face. 'Believe me when I say that I do want you. It's all I can think about. But I want it to be perfect for you. When we make love, it'll be your First time. But it's my first time, too. I've never been with someone I actually cared about. Hell, you're the first, the _only_ girl I've ever loved. So when we take that step, I don't want it to be rushed and hidden because your brother or your mom is right down the hall or downstairs. I want to savor every second of that moment, take care of you. I want it to be just us, just me, loving you, in every possible way.'

How could I argue with that? His words made perfect sense and his eyes… oh, those beautiful green eyes… they were shining with such hope and sincerity. I smiled through my tears and reached up to kiss him again, to which he happily complied.

'Soon, though, right?' I asked in between kisses.

'Sweetheart, I may be wanting to do the right thing here, but trust me when I say I'm only human.'

'Good. That's all I needed to hear.'

I wrapped my arms around his neck again and pulled him close.

He moved his lips from my mouth to my ear, where he whispered seductively, 'Besides, I can't seem to keep my hands off you as it is.'

As he spoke, one of his hands dipped into my panties and started stroking me to bliss.


	33. The boy is mine

**Disclaimer: as usual, I only came up with the storyline and the additional characters. Anything recognizable belongs to its respective creators/owners.**

**Play nice.**

**33.**** The boy is mine**

There was a reason why I loved Rosalie as a friend and as a sister; we had talked just this morning, but as I was getting dressed for dinner – leaving Edward disappointed that I wasn't wearing his shirt, but I promised I'd wear it the next day – she texted me.

_Hey sweetie, just checking in. How are you doing? If you need anything… - xo Rose_

Her concern was sweet and I was about to reply, telling her not to worry, when I remembered what had happened during lunch. I was certain I had sufficiently told off Whitney and her friends, but the original culprit still needed to be dealt with in order to relieve my anger. I wanted to hurt and humiliate Victoria the way she had me. Immature? Perhaps. But she appeared to be immune to reason. Besides, her behavior wasn't exactly showcasing maturity, either.

_Thnx hon, everything okay with E. But V's spreading nasty rumors about us :S – B_

I had barely put down my phone to pull on a sweater, when I got a reply.

_Are you shitting me? That cunt needs to know her place! Give me a sec, I have to check something. BBL._

Wow. She was angry. Rosalie was fiercely loyal to and protective of the people she cared about, so her anger about this was to be expected. I wondered what she was up to. I didn't have to wait long, because during dinner I felt my phone vibrate with multiple texts.

Renee kept up conversation, asking us all sorts of questions; how we were both doing in school, what we had been up to lately… It made me realize I had been neglecting my relationship with her. I silently vowed to myself to make more of an effort.

'So,' she broached another topic. 'One more day till Christmas break, right? Any plans?'

'Not really. I guess just hanging out and stuff. We could do something together if you'd like?' I offered, putting my new vow into effect right away.

Renee smiled at me, 'I'd like that, Bella. Maybe we could go for lunch and get a spa appointment? A little girl time.'

I smiled back, glad she appreciated it, 'Sure, mom.'

'And what about the holidays?' she asked, steering the conversation back to our plans for the upcoming school break.

'Well,' Edward answered. 'Emmett and Rosalie were talking about maybe having a small party at their place for New Year's, because we're all pretty fed up with the college parties.'

'Oh, mom,' I interjected. 'Before I forget: Em and I wanted to treat you and dad to dinner Christmas Eve, just the two of you. Since dad's been working so much and all. But it's supposed to be a surprise.'

'Oh sweetheart, that's wonderful! What a lovely gift. It's been so long since we've had a proper date night…'

I immediately felt a little guilty, because that wasn't the main reason for our gift. We also wanted no excuse not to accept the Cullens' invitation. I reminded myself to have Emmett included in my vow to spend more time with Renee, and was once again glad she had befriended Esme.

'But, will you be alright that night, Bella?'

'As a matter of fact, my father and Esme have invited both Bella and Emmett to dinner, and Bella is always welcome to have a sleepover with Alice,' Edward quickly answered.

'That's perfect, then. Oh, and Bella? I do hope you won't keep this,' she gestured between Edward and me. 'A secret from your father for too much longer. It's so complicated and you just make such a cute couple, you shouldn't be hiding.'

'I won't, mom. I don't like this sneaking around either. I promise to tell him, soon.'

It was the truth; I didn't want to lie to Charlie anymore. I just hoped he would be reasonable this time. Timing our reveal would probably be a hugely contributing factor in that.

After dinner, we had some coffee and indulged Renee in watching an episode of _Grey's Anatomy_ with her. It wasn't that I didn't like that particular show; I just preferred crime series, like _Bones_ or _Criminal Minds_, but they were too gruesome for Renee. When the episode ended, Edward excused himself, as it was getting pretty late. I walked him out and after I had bid him goodnight, I told Renee I would be going to my room.

'Edward's not sneaking back in, is he?' she asked with a wink.

'Mom! Definitely not! But Rosalie wanted to talk to me about something and then I'm going to call it a night. I'm pretty tired.'

'I was only kidding, honey. Goodnight. And say hi to her and Emmett for me.'

Once in the safety of my room, I flipped open my phone, to find a very long message from Rosalie, divided over several texts.

_Okay, here's the deal. V needs to go down. She only knows her own language i.e. __floozy, so we'll have to translate. Called A to check: since tomorrow is the last day before break, you won't really miss much. So: make sure you look even more fabulous than usual. During lunch, come over to the address I've given A. We'll show that whore not to mess with you – R_

I giggled as I re-read the message. I could almost see Rosalie, fuming, furiously typing on her phone. I quickly shot her an affirmative reply before setting my alarm thirty minutes early. I would need the extra time getting ready.

That Friday, during lunch, Alice and I left school in her car after a quick check-up in the bathroom. Angela and Jessica had decided to join us, apparently filled in on the plan by Alice. I, however, still had no idea what we were actually going to do, but Alice filled me in on the way.

'Okay, so it turns out Slutty McSkank shares a seminar with Edward and it's supposed to be about halfway through by the time we get there. Since the bitch won't back off, we're going to show her she's messing with the wrong girl. By the way, kudos for wearing his shirt, it's a nice touch and may be just what we need. So when we get to campus…'

'Wait, what?' I interrupted her. 'We're going to confront her during a seminar at U-Dub? Are you serious?'

I was beginning to freak out. No way could I do that. Standing up to a bunch of cheerleaders at my own school was one thing, but facing someone in a lecture hall full of strangers?

'B, relax. Jazz is in that seminar, too, and Em is in on the plan, so he's meeting us there with Rose. We've all got your back. Besides, nothing will be more humiliating to her than being told off by a gorgeous girl in a school uniform wearing _Edward Cullen's shirt_. Especially if you mention how she's supposed to have a boyfriend. Trust me, it'll work like a charm.'

True to their word, Emmett and Rosalie were waiting for us when we arrived on campus.

'Great idea, Bells, wearing Edward's shirt. I couldn't have come up with a better look,' Rosalie praised me.

'I was going to wear it today, anyway, for him,' I argued, but she waved me off.

'Doesn't matter. It's the icing on the cake. And you look hot in it.'

It turned out the seminar was indeed about halfway through and we reached the lecture hall right before the doors opened during a small coffee break. I peeked inside and saw Edward and Jasper sitting in one of the last rows. Jasper was subtly glancing toward the door and smiled when he noticed me. Edward, on the other hand, looked pretty aggravated and was shrunken away in his seat. It looked like he was trying to hide. I didn't have to search long before I spotted the source of his distress: Victoria was sitting a few rows further down, blatantly ogling him and making crude comments to some people around her. As I hesitantly made my way down the steps toward her, she looked up and her eyes fell on me.

'Speaking of silly virgins,' her shrill voice rang out loudly across the room. 'Look what the cat dragged in.'

That last sneer caught Edward's attention and we locked eyes for a moment. Normally, that would have been enough to occupy my attention, and my body was already gravitating towards him, but my thoughts were still focused. I managed to tear my eyes away from him, my anger and frustration at the forefront of my mind, and stalked down the steps, stopping a few feet in front of Victoria. In the short time it had taken me to reach her, I had gotten a good look at her. Dear lord, what was she thinking with that outfit? She had on the shortest skirt possible – thankfully with, ew, leopard print tights underneath – paired with some sort of skin tight sweater that I couldn't quite figure out, and frankly, didn't even want to. My panicked nerves were quickly replaced with determination to see this through.

Alice's encouraging words rang through my head, 'She's got nothing on you. Remember, he loves _you_ and she's nothing but a lying, conniving hussy.'

Victoria looked at me smugly, 'Well, if it isn't Emmett's little sister. What are you…?'

'Cut the crap, Vicki,' I interrupted her. 'I've had just about enough of you. Apparently you can't get it through your thick skull, or maybe all that spray-tan has caused brain damage, and honestly, I couldn't care less about your derogatory ways. However, they're aimed at _my_ boyfriend, and that just doesn't sit right with me. We've tried to break it to you nicely, and he's even been less gentle in telling you to back off, but you persist. So, since you obviously lack intelligence and common sense, let me give you a quick round up of the situation. For one, Edward is _mine_. See his name on my shirt? He _gave_ that to me, because I'm his _girlfriend_. That means he's off limits. Keep your filthy paws off him, you slore. If I _ever_ catch you within a mile of him, I won't be so friendly. And yes, that mile includes campus. So I suggest you drop this course, because you're obviously not in it for the academic merits.'

A group was forming around us, enjoying the scene. I would have been embarrassed at being in the spotlight like that, but the adrenaline coursing through my veins kept me going. I was on a roll now.

'Second, it's really pathetic that you feel you need to throw yourself at another girl's boyfriend, when you're supposed to have your own. And trying to compete with a high school girl? So sad…'

I shook my head for dramatic effect, then continued, not giving her time to react to my rant.

'Lastly, in case you hadn't noticed, you're in a lecture hall, not on a street corner. I suggest you behave accordingly, and seriously reconsider your wardrobe choices, lest someone mistake you for a cum dumpster. Although, I've heard that's actually a pretty accurate description of your hobby.'

Around me, people started snickering, while Victoria was gaping at me like a fish.

'Close that mouth, honey. Or are you trying to make a point? Someone got a dick to shove in that hole?' I finished, looking around at the gathered spectators as if I was expecting someone to raise their hand.

Someone actually started to applaud. Victoria audibly snapped her mouth shut. I turned around in a daze, the adrenaline making way for a nauseating tightness in my stomach. I managed to smile stiffly and slowly walked back up the steps to the door, where my friends and brother were watching my performance. They didn't even have to step in and add their two cents. I was pleasantly surprised with myself, but right now, I just wanted to get out of there and into the fresh outside air.

Edward met me about halfway up the stairs and took hold of me.

'Bella, what…? That was… wow… I… I'm speechless. You just… blow my mind!'

I didn't let him continue his jumbled praise and instead claimed his mouth with my own. I needed to feel connected to him as much as I wanted the public display of affection. Though the closeness to Edward was the dominant feeling I was craving.

'Take me away from here?' I whispered.

'My pleasure,' he smiled. 'And by the way, you look so hot, wearing my shirt!'

**A/N Wow, this chapter practically wrote itself! I barely updated and already this came out. It's a little shorter than usual, but the part that follows doesn't really fit with the content of this chapter, so I decided to make it into two separate ones. Thanks to JenMixelle and Bleriana for pre-reading and to KitsuShel and missrebecca_12 (among others) for their support during WCs.**


	34. A sky that had never been blue

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer came up with the original characters, Summit put them on film for us all to enjoy. I'm just having my way with them.**

******A/N Thanks to miss_rebecca12 for allowing me to bounce some ideas off her during our WCs.**  


* * *

**34. A sky that had never been blue**

Sunday afternoon found me and Renee at the same spa I had been to with Rosalie and Alice. Renee was of course not yet familiar with all that Seattle had to offer, so she had called Esme for some recommendations. When she made our reservations, I asked her to request Gianna, the aesthetician who had treated me last time. Because, even though she had tortured me with the bikini wax, she was otherwise very gentle and pleasant. Also, she had already seen me in the compromising position.

It was really nice spending some time with my mother. Back in London, we would go out on mother-daughter trips quite regularly; visiting a museum, seeing a musical near Leicester Square… but now that I was spending more time with my brother, my boyfriend and my new friends, these outings had sort of fallen through the cracks. I liked having some time to ourselves right now, and knew Renee would enjoy the pampering. Touching up on the wax was also a, not welcome, but nevertheless necessary opportunity.

We had lunch first and then squeezed in some shopping before our appointment, because Renee wanted to buy a new dress for Christmas. We had decided on a deep green, satin halter dress and I had suggested she get a matching pashmina scarf to wear over it. The moment she had put it on, we both knew it was the perfect dress. She looked so young and beautiful in it!

'So Bella,' Renee started as we were getting our massages. 'Things with you and Edward seem to be going well.'

'Yeah, I guess so. He's really sweet to me and… I don't know, I just feel so safe and comfortable around him,' I answered truthfully.

'I'm glad, sweetie. I just hope you're being careful…'

'Mom!' I cut her off, flushing and thankful I was face down on the chair so she couldn't see the embarrassed look on my face.

'Bella, relax,' she giggled. 'I didn't mean it like that. Well, not completely, anyway. Sweetheart, this is your first boyfriend. I've seen the way he looks at you. Like he would jump in front of a bullet for you.'

_He probably would._

'Is that bad?'

'Not necessarily, but it's intense. You two are so… _aware_ of each other. It both warms and breaks my heart. Do you understand?'

I thought so. She was worried I would get hurt, should things between us not work out.

'I'm your mother; I'm supposed to worry about you. Remember, no matter what happens, you'll always be my little girl and you can talk to me.'

'I will, mom, thanks.'

'That being said, _are_ you being careful… otherwise? We haven't really talked about stuff like this in a while and I know I gave you the basics…'

'Mom, do you really want to know about this?' I groaned.

'Well, you don't have to give me all the details, but honey, you're seventeen and in a pretty serious relationship. It's only natural you'd want to… explore, and I'm not going to tell you not to. That would be silly and unrealistic. But I would like to think you're comfortable in talking to me about this, and letting me know when you've taken that step.'

That sounded fairly reasonable and there wasn't really anything I could think of to argue.

'Sure, mom. And yes, we are being careful. But _that_… hasn't happened… yet,' I offered.

Once the awkward topic was covered to Renee's satisfaction, we continued our massages and the rest of our spa treatment in comfortable silence.

Charlie was sitting in the living room when we got back, engrossed in his newspaper. He put it aside, though, as he heard us come in, and greeted Renee with a kiss. I hadn't seen them be affectionate like that in quite some time, maybe even before we moved, so I was a little flustered at witnessing their exchange.

He appeared to be in a better mood today, more cheerful than he had been in a long while. I supposed that was a good sign. Maybe he really would be reasonable next time I would bring up Edward. Maybe last time was just an untimely coincidence and he had reacted so badly because he was stressed out over work.

I sincerely hoped so.

'How was your spa day?' he asked.

'Wonderful, darling. It was very relaxing and we had a great time together, didn't we, Bella?'

I nodded my affirmation.

'Oh, Isabella?' Charlie addressed me. 'I noticed your report card on my desk. Very well done. I'm glad to see you're spending your time wisely and keeping your grades up and taking those AP classes. This will look very good on your college applications.'

'Thanks, daddy.'

'Now do you see why I didn't want you dating for a while? A boy would only distract you. This way you can spend time with your brother and your friends without having to worry about your academics slipping. Do you understand?'

I resisted the urge to snort at his logic. Edward wasn't a distraction at all. Okay, maybe he was, but it didn't jeopardize my schoolwork. Like Charlie said, I was taking AP courses and was getting straight A's, aside from a B in Chemistry. And all that was _with_ dividing my free time between everyone in my life.

Charlie wouldn't appreciate nor understand that reaction, though, and I didn't want to risk ruining his good mood, so I just nodded meekly.

'Yes, daddy.'

'Good. Oh, by the way, your friend Alice came by and dropped something off for you. I had her put it in your room. She said something about accessorizing for Christmas?'

'Right, she told me Es- her stepmother had gotten me something to go with my outfit for dinner. Thanks, I'll go check it out and then call it a night.'

A couple of days later, Christmas Eve had arrived and I was in my room, putting on my black suede boots. Taking a final look in the mirror, I took in my reflection and was quite pleased with what I saw. I was wearing a short, loose-fitting black silk dress with a cascading neckline, paired with deep blue tights covered in small rhinestones, like glitter. The package Alice had dropped off had contained a beautiful belt-like chain made up of silver flowers, set with stones in a rich sapphire color, and now hung low on my hips. I reminded myself to thank Esme for the gift when I arrived at their house. There had also been a note from Alice, requesting I not wear any other jewellery, so as to not distract from the tights, belt and neckline. Beside Esme's gift, she had also left a small bag on my bed which had already made me suspicious, and hoping Charlie hadn't seen it. _Agent Provocateur_ it read in elegant letters. When I opened it, after checking my door was closed, I found another note from Alice.

_Dear Bella,_

_Here's a little something from Rosalie and me, as an early Christmas gift. Don't worry, we'll both also get you something you can open in front of your and our parents :p_

_I know you're staying in my room, but that's no reason not to give Edward something to think about when he's all alone in his room… And that's the last I'll say of it, because there's no way I want to envision my brother like that. LOL._

_Anyway, open up your present and meet Heather. She's a perfect match to the outfit we've chosen and will make you feel sexy and confident, even if no one else will see it._

_Love_

_Alice_

Curious, I pushed aside the tissue paper and found the most beautiful lingerie I had ever seen. Alice had been right: it was sexy, but not too much to make me feel exposed, and its colors matched my clothes. I didn't even have to hesitate in putting it on.

'Bella,' Renee called from downstairs. 'Are you about ready? Emmett will be here to pick you up soon and then your dad and I are leaving.'

'Coming!' I called, then grabbed my overnight bag and the garment bag with my dress for the next day, before carefully making my way down the stairs.

I was getting more comfortable walking in heals, but I still took extra care in situations like these, to prevent any more injury than I was already prone to. So far, I hadn't fallen down any stairs since that day in October.

'Oh sweetie, you look absolutely lovely! Is that a new belt? I haven't seen it before…' Renee gushed.

'Thanks. Yeah, it was in the package Alice had brought over. You both look very nice, too,' I complimented my parents.

Renee was wearing the dress we had bought together, and Charlie was wearing a matching tie with his Italian suit.

'Do you have everything you need? Are you sure you don't want us to pick you up tomorrow?' she asked.

'Yes, mom, I have my bag and if I've forgotten anything, I'm sure I can borrow something from Alice. And Em will pick me up tomorrow, it's on his way, so don't worry. You just enjoy your evening together and we'll see you tomorrow.'

After hugs from both my parents, I ushered them out the door and waved at them as they drove off. When I turned to go back inside, I heard another car pull up, and Emmett shouting from the passenger side window.

'Bells, come on, we've got to go!'

I laughed at his energy and motioned to give me a minute, before rushing inside to gather my things and my coat, then slid into the back seat of Rosalie's red BMW. She had her hair swept up in a high ponytail with some tendrils falling loose around her face, softening the look, and through her open coat I could see the lace of the layered mini dress she had shown me the week before. Emmett was wearing a black suit with a vest and a light blue v-neck shirt underneath instead of a dress shirt.

'Wow, Em, that's maybe the second time I've seen you in a suit. Are you trying to impress someone?'

The only other time I had seen him wear one, was for his high school prom. He always said he felt restricted in a suit, a he did look more comfortable in his jeans and tight-fitting shirts, but I liked seeing him all cleaned up from time to time.

'Well, daddy C asked us to look nice 'cause it's a special occasion, so…' he started defending himself.

'Don't worry, I'm only joking. You both look great!'

'Thanks, sweetie,' Rosalie interjected. 'I like what you did with your hair, by the way.'

With the compliments exchanged, we went on our way.

Carlisle and Esme greeted us at the door, looking very much like the power couple they were; Esme in a black pencil skirt and a purple silk blouse while Carlisle was wearing a light blue V-neck sweater over his dress shirt and tie, setting off his bright eyes.

'Rosalie, sweetheart, I'm so glad you're here,' Esme gushed as she hugged her daughter.

'Of course, mom. Where else would I be?' Rosalie asked, laughing at her mother's emotions.

Carlisle and Emmett shook hands in greeting and ushered us all inside, quickly closing the door against the chilly December air. When he turned to me, I took the opportunity to thank him for inviting me.

'Nonsense, Bella. You're as much a part of this family as Emmett is and we wouldn't have it any other way,' he dismissed my thanks, to which Esme nodded enthusiastically.

It was nice, feeling so welcome by people that had come to mean a great deal to me in a relatively short amount of time.

I looked around subtly, or at least I hoped it was subtle, trying to locate Edward. Apparently I was pretty obvious in my search, however, because Esme leaned over to whisper to me conspiratorially, 'He's in the kitchen, getting some drinks ready.' She then winked at me as I gaped at her.

'Alice, disentangle yourself from your boyfriend and come greet our guests!' Carlisle called up the stairs and I stifled a giggle.

'Coming!' I heard Alice yell back from her room.

I was amazed at how relaxed both he and Esme were about their children being together and living in the same house. My parents, especially Charlie, wouldn't be as accommodating.

Moments later, Alice practically floated down the stairs, Jasper in tow. And by 'floated' I mean that she looked so ethereal in her flowing white dress with a matching cardigan, she reminded me of one of those angels in a children's book or Christmas carol. Quite fitting for the occasion, I figured.

'Bella! You're here!' she cheered as she launched herself at me.

'Of course, Pix, I was invited, remember?' I giggled.

'Right, duh. Still, I'm so glad my bestie is here tonight! And I see you got Esme's gift I brought over the other day.'

'I did, yes. By the way, thanks so much, Esme. It really wasn't necessary, but I very much appreciate it.'

She beamed at me in response.

'Did you get your other gift as well?' Alice asked excitedly.

'I did,' I answered, and looked at her pointedly, hoping she'd understand not to question me further on the subject.

There was no use in making Emmett all worried about his little sister wearing expensive lingerie, even if his own girlfriend had bought it for her.

'Cute dress,' I commented, directing attention back towards Alice.

'Thanks! It's a J. Mendel, and the shoes are Sergio Rossi. Daddy and Esme gave them to me for Christmas,' she grinned.

I had no idea who they were, but they sounded like high end designers and thus expensive. Nothing but the best for Alice.

'Did you get Fabio here a matching top or something?' Emmett snickered.

Alice huffed, clearly offended at her taste in fashion being questioned, and Rosalie smacked his arm. There wasn't anything wrong with what Jasper was wearing, but I understood why Emmett thought the mostly unbuttoned dress shirt with the suspenders and t-shirt underneath matching the grey pants were funny. It wasn't something he would wear, but it suited Jasper. He actually looked a little like Orlando Bloom, but blonde. I wouldn't put it passed Alice to having used him as inspiration.

'For the record, I happen to be very comfortable in my masculinity, big E,' he answered. 'And if it makes Ali happy, I don't care.'

'And you all look very dashing,' Esme said, effectively ending the discussion. 'Now, let's go into the living room for some drinks before dinner.'

'I'll just go put my stuff upstairs real quick,' I said, heading toward the stairs.

'Here, let me help you,' Edward said, materializing beside me.

I stood there for a moment, dazed at his sudden appearance and the package in which it was presented to me: tousled hair, fitted white shirt, black skinny tie and black pants. How anyone could look so sinful all covered up was beyond me. I shamelessly let my eyes roam his body before focusing on his face. He was watching me with those gorgeous, dazzling green eyes, a knowing smirk playing on his lips. He kissed my cheek, picked up my bag and took my hand, leading the way.

'No defiling of my room!' Alice yelled after us.

After depositing my things in Alice's room, I gingerly closed the door and moved to go back downstairs, but Edward spun me around and pinned me to the wall, his arms trapping me in.

'I really like having you here,' he breathed as his lips skimmed my neck down to the hollow at the base of my throat, making me shiver in pleasure. 'And I can't wait to get you alone for an extended period of time.'

I gasped at his seductive promise and pulled him close to me by his tie, kissing him with a hungry passion. I was getting lost in his kiss and his scent, and whimpered a little when he pulled back, causing him to chuckle.

'Patience, love, first we have a dinner to sit through,' he said, taking my hand and leading my flushed and flustered self to the living room.

After the main course, Carlisle tapped his glass, calling the attention of everyone at the table. As curious eyes turned to him, he rose from his seat and looked at each of us, before speaking.

'I am so happy to be celebrating this holiday with all of you; my children, my stepchildren, and their loves, whom I consider my own. It's good to see you all so loved and loving in return. There is no better way to spend this time of year. Let's toast to this and hope we will have many more occasions like it.'

He raised his glass and we all followed suit. After the toast he continued.

'There's another reason why I'm glad you're all here tonight. As you know, Esme and I have been very happy together for the past eight years. We've both had hardships to overcome and have found kindred spirits in each other. Our combined family is more than I could have ever wished for. But recently,' he said, as he took Esme's hand and gazed at her lovingly. 'Esme has made me an even happier man, when she agreed to be my wife.'

The table fell silent for a moment. Then, everything seemed to happen at once. I felt Edward freeze up next to me and reached for his hand, but he pulled it away. At the same time, both Alice and Rosalie started sniffling, Alice nearly toppling over her chair in her hurry to embrace the happy couple. Emmett rubbed Rosalie's arm soothingly while voicing his congratulations across the table and Jasper was smiling broadly.

'When is the big day?' he asked.

'We've decided on Valentine's Day,' Esme answered. 'And we want all of you there. It won't be an elaborate wedding, but we want all our children there to share the moment with us. Rosalie, would you be my maid of honor, dear?'

'Of course, mom, I'd love to!' she beamed.

'And Edward,' Carlisle said. 'It would mean so much to me if you would be my best man.'

Edward still sat frozen.

I squeezed his leg and whispered his name to pull him out of his thoughts. He looked at me, then Carlisle, startled.

'Uhm, sorry… Yeah, sure… Excuse me,' he mumbled and hastily got to his feet and left the dining room.

We heard him going upstairs, then a door slam, before loud, angry music floated down seconds later. I looked at Esme and Carlisle, shrugging apologetically, but they waved it off after the initial shock to Edward's behavior wore off.

'It's okay, Bella. This is a difficult time for him,' Carlisle explained. 'The anniversary of his mother's death is approaching and he always gets a little troubled around that time of year. This year probably even more, because it's been ten years. It's a difficult time for all of us…'

He trailed off at the end, obviously choking up a little. I felt really bad for him. He was so happy with Esme, but I knew he had never forgotten about his first wife, Elizabeth. How could he; he would see her whenever her saw his children. Esme took his hand in hers again and squeezed it, before speaking gently.

'I know the timing is a little… precarious. But we just didn't want to wait any longer. I'm sure once he's had time to calm down and process everything, he'll be as happy as the others. Just give him some time.'

I hoped she was right. Carlisle was obviously upset, and I could only imagine what this must have been like for Esme. She put on a brave face though, being the mother of this family.

'Should I…?' I started asking, but Alice interrupted my question.

'Just let him be for a moment. He'll come to you when he's ready.'

'Now, as to my other children,' Esme picked up conversation after an uncomfortable silence. 'Jasper, I'd like you to keep the rings safe and walk me down the aisle.'

He smiled and nodded.

'And Alice,' she continued. 'Would you design my dress? Nothing fancy, but classic and elegant.'

'Really?' she squeaked. 'Oh wow, that is such an honor. Yes, of course!'

I couldn't really focus on them anymore, though. Not with Edward blaring music upstairs, locking himself away. After a few more minutes of worrying, I excused myself.

'Esme, Carlisle, congratulations, I'm really happy for you. Also, thank you for dinner. I'm sorry to cut this short, but I think Edward needs me right now.'

They both smiled at me in thanks and Emmett quickly squeezed my hand as I passed him.

I knocked on Edward's door, but received no answer. Carefully, I tried the door, and found it unlocked. His room was dark, music still blasting from his sound system. He wasn't in his room, but I saw light streaming from under his bathroom door. I turned down the volume, flicked on a light and sat down on his bed, waiting for him.

The sight of him when he finally emerged from his bathroom startled me. He looked so tired. Apparently he had put his head under the tap, because his hair was wet. He looked past me, as if he didn't even see me, and mumbled something that sounded like, 'Leave me alone.'

This might be a little tricky, but I was determined to stay, and kept looking at him.

'Go away, B, I'm not in the mood for this.'

Even though I knew he didn't really mean them, his words hurt. He had never turned me away before. I tried not to let it show, though, and was thankful for the relative darkness.

_Okay, deep breaths. Inhale… exhale…_

'No,' I said, trying to sound as calm as possible.

He still wouldn't look at me and made to leave himself. When he walked past me I took hold of his hand in an attempt to stop him. My grip wasn't near as tight or strong enough to stop him, but he did and bowed his head, almost as in defeat.

'Edward?' I tried again.

He sighed. I pulled him to me and slowly, he sat down. I ran a hand gently through his hair and he finally looked up at me.

'What do you expect from me now?' he asked, obviously still trying to put up a distant front.

'I just want to be here for you,' I confessed. 'You shouldn't be alone right now.'

'Do you think you can make me feel better, make me forget?' he asked bitterly.

'No. I just don't want you to wallow all by yourself. It's not good for you.'

He was lost in thought for a moment. I could see he was trying to be stubborn and not give in to my reasoning, but after a while his glare softened and I knew I had persuaded him. He forced a small smile.

'Oh well, some distraction can't hurt, I guess.'

I swung my leg over him so I was facing him on his lap, took his head in my hands and softly kissed him. His hands slid from my thighs to my back, pulling me close. At first I could tell he was still very much distracted; his kisses were more superficial than usual, lacking the passion I knew they could possess.

Continuing with peppering his face with sweet little kisses, I gently stroked his face. This hopelessness to help him was the worst feeling. I wanted to take away all of his pain, all of the sadness he was feeling. But all I could do was be there for him and kiss him. So I did, with everything I had, hoping it would be enough.

Things changed after a couple of minutes; his grip on me tightened and his kiss became more urgent and intense, in the way that usually left me breathless. But there was something else in this heady mix; I just couldn't really pinpoint it yet.

'B,' he sighed. 'I need you. So damn much…'

He sounded so vulnerable… I couldn't hold back the shiver that coursed through me. In answer I pressed myself even closer to him and tangled my fingers in his hair. His warm hands slipped underneath my dress, pushing it up. I understood what he was getting at and helped him take it off. His breathing became heavier, his kisses filled with want and his hands were roaming my skin hungrily. I surrendered to him, his body, his lust, his need…

Suddenly he stopped and pulled back, his forehead resting against mine. Confused, I opened my eyes and was met with his hurt-filled ones, the green shimmering with unshed tears.

'I'm sorry,' he whispered. 'I thought I'd be alright.'

It took me a moment to understand what he was talking about. But when I shifted in his lap, I noticed an absence of the one thing that usually was a _permanent fixture_.

'Oh,' was my genius reply.

He started to move to get up and move me off his lap, but I tightened my arms around his neck and wrapped my legs around his waist.

'Edward, stay,' I said. 'We don't have to do anything. That's not what I came here for. I just want to be there for you.'

He held on to me for dear life. It felt so strange, having him defenseless and vulnerable in my arms. Edward was strong, masculine, confident, protective… This was so wrong. What could possibly be going on in that beautiful head? But at the same time it felt so right, holding him, trying to help him. This was where we both belonged.

He buried his face in my hair, inhaling deeply. The scent of my strawberry shampoo apparently calmed him, or so he had said on one occasion. I ran my hand through his hair and whispered softly in his ear, telling him I was there for him and that everything would be okay.

'Baby, talk to me,' I asked again, but he didn't respond, instead sobbing quietly into my hair.

'I can't… still… not even…' he choked out between sobs, the words barely audible.

I kept stroking his hair, trying to soothe him, then took his head in my hands and pulled back a little so I could look into his eyes. Leaning in, I softly kissed him, tasting the salt of his tears on his lips.

'Talk to me,' I whispered against his lips. 'I'm here for you.'

He tightened his hold on me even more, as if he were bracing himself for a storm. And then he started.

Elizabeth had been such an important person in his life when he was a child. Of course she had been; she was his mother. I couldn't even imagine how he must have felt at losing her. Alice had told me before that it was much different for him than it had been for her. She had been only six years old, but Edward, at eleven, had been fully aware of what was happening to his mother, how the disease was eating at her, and powerless to stop it. To watch his mother whither away before his eyes, not knowing how to help her, having to watch his father despair, not being able to save her… My heart broke for the little boy in his family portrait.

'I was so scared, and so angry. And later, I felt so guilty, because Esme was incredibly good to all of us. So I started doing stupid things, dangerous things. I just couldn't take it anymore, didn't want to feel the hurt and the anger anymore. One time, when I was sixteen, a stunt went bad and I ended up in the ER with a broken wrist and ankle and a big cut on my chin…'

So that's how he got the scar, I thought to myself.

'My father made me see a therapist after that, and he suggested I find a different outlet for my frustrations. I don't think he meant it the way I took it, though. I sought refuge in sex.'

Alice had told me this, too, but it was different, coming from him. It was as if his confession made it all the more real to me. I had to swallow the lump in my throat.

'I was such a horrible kid! But I didn't even care, because it took my mind off thinking too much. But then I grew tired of that, too. I wanted more than some random hook-ups. And then you showed up…' his voice softened and seemed to lose the pained edge to it. 'And you… you gave me peace. Attention and affection, which I don't deserve. I didn't want to hurt you, didn't want to burden you. And why should I? I was doing better. But then, today, the announcement… Despite everything… I still can't… shut it down. And I end up shutting you out. I'm so sorry!'

This was so frustrating! He blamed himself for everything that had happened!

I noticed I was crying to. A strangled sob broke out of my chest and he looked back up at me.

'B, what's wrong? Oh love, I'm so sorry! Now I'm hurting you, too… I'm so sorry…' he cried and clutched me to him.

No! I couldn't allow him to make him feel even worse about himself. This wasn't his fault! I didn't know what I was feeling anymore, whether it were anger, frustration, sadness…

'No, Edward, you're not hurting me. You could never hurt me. I just feel so… _powerless_! I see how this is killing you, and there's nothing I can do to make it better. I love you, but I can't help you… and that's…'

'_What_ did you say?' he interrupted me.

'I… I love you, Edward.'

Yes. That was it. _That_ was why it was all the more frustrating. I loved him, but didn't know how to help him with this.

He looked at me, new tears forming in his eyes, but also an almost triumphant smile gracing his beautiful face. Suddenly his lips crushed mine with so much force, the need and longing in his kiss was apparent.


	35. Truly, madly, deeply

**Disclaimer: Stephenie Meyer came up with Twilight and the characters. I just like to mess with Edward.**

* * *

**35. Truly, madly, deeply**

My father rose to make a speech after the main course. He first toasted to all our happiness and sharing the company of his loved ones. I couldn't agree more with him, and gladly raised my glass. He and Esme had allowed Alice and Bella to drink some champagne, too, because they were under parental supervision and apparently the occasion called for it. I was a little surprised at that, because I had never been allowed to drink before I became of age, not even at Christmas or New Year's spent at home. I wondered what was so special about _this_ dinner.

I would soon find out, though.

'There's another reason why I'm glad you're all here tonight. As you know, Esme and I have been very happy together for the past eight years. We've both had hardships to overcome and have found kindred spirits in each other. Our combined family is more than I could have ever wished for. But recently, Esme has made me an even happier man, when she agreed to be my wife.'

Wait… what? Wife? They were… _getting married_? When did this happen? They had just moved in together! And why marry at all? Esme's first husband pretty much abandoned them… And what about mom? Had he forgotten about her? It hadn't even been ten years yet, for crying out loud! Didn't he know the date was approaching? Is this how he planned on honoring her memory?

I vaguely registered people talking, laughing, crying around me, and someone trying to touch me, but I couldn't. Not now. It was like a bubble of some sort had formed around me, separating me from my surroundings, numbing me. I needed to be alone. The excitement around me, it was just too much to take. The scene before me blurred into non-distinguishable shapes and colors, not making sense anymore.

That was, until I heard a soft voice whispering my name. _Bella_. She was trying to get my attention, get me to come back to the present. I needed to, wanted to. For her. If only for a few seconds. I looked at her, those beautiful brown eyes shimmering with worry.

Dad had asked me something while I wasn't paying attention. What was it again?

Best man.

Could I do that?

Maybe.

After I had given it some thought. I don't know. Whatever.

I couldn't deal with this right now.

I murmured something non-committal, then hurried to excuse myself and escape to my room.

I needed to be alone right now.

How long had I spent in the dark, sulking, listening to angry music, feeling sorry for myself? I had no idea. After a while I trudged into my bathroom and stuck my head under the tap, hoping the cold water would somehow calm me or otherwise pull me from my horrible mood. When I walked back out, prepared to collapse onto my bed and sulk some more, I found Bella waiting for me. She had flicked on a light and turned down the music, but sat still on my bed, looking at me expectantly.

I didn't want to get her involved in this, so I grumbled in her general direction to leave me alone. She just kept looking at me.

'Go away, B, I'm not in the mood for this,' I said, a little louder this time.

It wasn't that I didn't want her there with me; I was trying to get her out of the line of fire.

She paused, but then simply said, 'No.'

Fine, I would leave myself, and started to head towards my door. But when I walked past her, she grabbed my hand, which made me stop. Somehow, her touch, her presence, took the edge off the pain and frustration I was feeling.

'Edward?' she asked softly and I sighed.

She then coaxed me to sit down next to her. When she ran her hand through my hair, I finally looked up at her. I saw nothing but care and worry in her eyes. She obviously wanted to help me, but I wasn't sure if she could. Or if I would be able to share all of that with her. What if it would freak her out? What if she couldn't cope, or understand? What did she expect from me?

'I just want to be here for you,' she said. 'You shouldn't be alone right now.'

'Do you think you can make me feel better, make me forget?' I questioned her harshly.

'No. I just don't want you to wallow all by yourself. It's not good for you.'

I mulled that over for a while.

Did she really mean that? Was she ready, actually willing to put up with all the shit from my past? Sure, she had gotten glimpses of it on a couple of occasions, but this ran so much deeper that what she was aware of.

Then again, it wasn't really my place to tell her what she could and couldn't handle. I should probably let her decide for herself.

Also, maybe spending time with her would take my mind off things, at least for a little while.

She moved to sit in my lap and kissed me, her soft lips gently caressing mine. My hands naturally found purchase on her body, sliding up from her legs to rest on the small of her back, anchoring her to me. I needed to feel her this close to me, to know this was real, to feel her affection.

I needed her.

So fucking much.

She shivered a little, then continued to kiss me, her hands reaching up into my hair and tugging gently. I loved it when she did that – it was just raw enough to give a rough edge to the sweetest of her kisses, and it always made me want her even more.

My body was already reacting to her proximity; my heart was racing and I was breathing heavier, and my desire for this girl, her body as much as everything else that she offered me, was overriding my earlier frustrations and doubts. My hands traced back down to her thighs, slipping underneath her dress and pushing it up. She helped me take it off, revealing more of her skin to me. She was wearing this lacy bra that was either blue or some sort of light purple, with black lace over it, and it fit her perfectly, complementing her skin and her curves. This was what I had been wanting to do ever since she had walked through the door earlier, and when I had her pinned against the wall outside Alice's room. I had been getting lost in her kiss and her scent, and had wanted nothing more than to make the kiss last forever, or take her to my room. Unfortunately, we had our family and friends waiting for us to join them for dinner. But now, she was here, kissing me and holding on to me as desperately as I was her. I surrendered to her, to her touch, her kiss…

But after a while, a nagging little voice in the back of my mind started questioning my actions. Wasn't I as bad as my father, seeking refuge in the soft body of another woman to keep depressing thoughts at bay? Wasn't I also disrespecting my mother's memory? Wasn't this cowardly denial, too? That mental sneer caused me to tumble back down into the spiral of negative thoughts that had been consuming me, extinguishing the fire that had started to burn inside of me because of Bella.

Defeated, I pulled out of the kiss and rested my forehead against hers. When she opened her eyes, I couldn't hold back the tears anymore.

'I'm sorry,' I whispered. 'I thought I'd be alright.'

She appeared confused for a moment, but when she shifted in my lap, and realized what was happening, I tried to move away from her again. There was no use in exposing her to any more of my failures.

Bella wouldn't let me, though, instead tightening her hold on me and telling me to stay.

'I just want to be there for you.'

I clung to her even more securely, needing to feel connected to her, gaining strength from her presence and comforting caresses and soothing voice. I buried my face in her hair and breathed in her scent, the strawberry shampoo mixed with something that wasn't easy to describe, but made her Bella, and home, to me.

She ran her hand through my hair and whispered softly in my ear, 'Baby, talk to me.'

It took me a moment or two before I finally managed to choke out a few unintelligible words. She cupped my face in her hands and looked at me intently before gently kissing me.

'Talk to me,' she whispered. 'I'm here for you.'

This was it. I had to tell her everything.

And so I did.

I told her about my mother. How she was everything to me when I was a kid. Yes, Esme was kind and loving and nurturing and what not, but she wasn't my _mother_. No one could ever replace her. It killed me to know that she would never get to meet Bella, get to see how amazing she was, how she calmed me, how _she_ was now everything to me.

But she had gotten sick when I was ten, and the doctors were powerless against the disease. It had been too aggressive, too fast, and they hadn't known what to do. Alice was just five years old and blissfully ignorant, only aware that her mother was tired. But I was there for every single moment of it. I saw her throwing up after each bite of food that she managed to swallow, eventually vomiting blood when there was nothing left in her stomach. I tried to cool her feverish head and tried to soothe her pains. During her more lucid moments, I played my piano for her, because she said she loved my rendering of her favorite song. I tried so hard to be the strong son she needed me to be, to be the help my father needed me to be. But it wasn't enough. After months of agonizing torture, her body finally gave up on her.

At first, I was devastated, and lost. I didn't know what to do with myself now that I wasn't helping my father take care of her. I couldn't even look at my piano again without feeling a crippling pain tear through me.

After the sorrow and the pain came anger. I couldn't accept that she was gone and there was nothing I could do about it. I also resented my father and all the other doctors who had treated her. They should have saved her. Maybe that was part of the reason why I didn't want to go to medical school, opting for law school instead. I didn't know, for sure, but I did know that I couldn't deal with that kind of frustration again.

Later I felt so guilty, because Esme was incredibly good to all of us. So I started doing stupid things, dangerous things. I just couldn't take it anymore, didn't want to feel the hurt and the anger anymore. One time, when I was sixteen, a stunt went bad and I ended up in the ER with a broken wrist and ankle and a big cut on my chin. My father made me see a therapist after that, and he suggested I find a different outlet for my frustrations. I don't think he meant it the way I took it, though. I sought refuge in sex. I was such a horrible guy! But I didn't even care, because it took my mind off thinking too much. But then I grew tired of that, too. I wanted more than some random hook-ups.

And then I met Bella. And she gave me peace. Attention and affection, which I didn't deserve. I didn't want to hurt her, didn't want to burden her. And why should I? I was doing better. But then, today, the announcement… Despite everything… I still couldn't shut it down. And I ended up shutting her out in my attempts to block the negative feelings.

Bella was quiet, letting me rant and vent. But then I noticed she was breathing heavily and a sob broke out of her chest.

This was so frustrating! Not only had I ruined my family's Christmas dinner and my father's happy news, I had also made the girl I loved cry. What the hell was wrong with me? Couldn't I get anything right?

I started to apologize, but she interrupted me.

'No, Edward, you're not hurting me. You could never hurt me. I just feel so… _powerless_! I see how this is killing you, and there's nothing I can do to make it better. I love you, but I can't help you… and that's…'

Now it was my turn to interrupt her rambling.

'_What_ did you say?'

I wasn't sure if I had heard her correctly. And if I had, I wanted to hear it again.

She gazed back at me, wide-eyed.

'I… I love you, Edward,' she finally repeated.

That jerked me right out of my miserable mood.

Bella loved me. She actually _loved_ me!

Suddenly, I was overcome with emotions of a different kind.

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**A/N Awww don't you just want to hug Edward and make it all better? Well, I guess that's just what Bella did, without even fully realizing it. What did you think?**

**I know this chapter is a little shorter than what you guys are used to with me, but I felt this was a good place to end it. What happens next didn't really mesh well with all the emotions flying around before. I'll try to update before my birthday (which is April 30th, our national holiday) because I want to give myself the following events as a gift, as well. Yeah, it's already in my head and I can't wait to share it with you!**


	36. Like a virgin

**A/N Sorry it took me a little longer to update. RL has been a bitch with making me work long hours and getting up way too early for my liking. Also, the week I had intended to update was extra crazy due to our national holiday and my birthday, so I had even less time to devote to my writing. I hope the chapter was worth the wait…**

**Thanks to my WC peeps for the motivation and bouncing off ideas, and thanks to Rebecca (missrebecca_12) for beta'ing this for me.**

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**36. Like a virgin**

I couldn't believe this was really happening.

I had told Bella all about my past, what I had done, but more importantly, why I had done it. And she hadn't run away screaming. Instead, she had comforted me and listened, being there for me, letting me vent, holding me, letting me hold onto her.

More even, she loved me. She actually told me she loved me.

Bella Swan loved me back!

What a turn of events.

I had feared that my outburst and sulking would have driven her away. It should have. Who would want to put up with that? A grown man, crying over his long dead mother and lashing out to the people who care about him. Fleeing in reckless and promiscuous behavior – granted, that was now in the past, but still. Just about snapping at the one person he finally let in, letting his guard down…

But no, she stayed. She stayed, and showed me, in both her words and her actions, that she wasn't going anywhere. She was right there with me, caring for me.

_Loving_ me.

I was astounded.

And as our kisses grew ever more heated, I became increasingly turned on and burning for her. I needed her; I wanted to show her just how much I loved her and what she was giving me.

I knew she was ready. She had told me so before, and it had almost happened on several occasions over the past two weeks. But even though we both knew this, it was still her first time, _our_ first time, and I wanted to make it worthwhile.

I would show her how much I cherished her, worshiped her, loved her…

Holding her close to me, I leaned back until I was flat on my back, with Bella on top of me, never breaking the kiss. Her hands moved down from my hair to the collar of my shirt where she started loosening my tie and unfastening the buttons. I flipped us over so she was lying down, then swiftly removed my shirt and tie and tossed them, along with her boots, across the room. After peeling off her jeweled tights, I made my way back up her body, kissing every inch of skin along the way and flicking her belly ring with my tongue.

'Say it again,' I pleaded against her lips.

She took my head in her hands and pushed me back a little, looking intently into my eyes.

'Edward Cullen, I love you,' she said deliberately. 'So much.'

Matching grins broke out on both our faces and we kissed slowly, just reveling in the emotion. After a few minutes, Bella pulled me down toward her and started to grind her hips against mine, moaning softly in between kisses. There was an urgency in the way she was moving against me. Before long we were both panting. Bella hooked her legs around mine, anchoring me to her, and fumbled with my button fly while I freed her breasts from her bra cups and massaged them in my hands. I paid special attention to her nipples with both my fingers and my mouth. She responded immediately, arching her back, pushing her soft peaks closer to my face. When she had managed to unbutton my fly, she actually used her feet to push down my jeans.

_Impressive. And coy._

Her boldness further encouraged me and I unclasped her bra, tossing it away. It was a beautiful piece of lingerie, and probably pretty expensive – I had overheardAlicetalking about buying some for Bella and she didn't settle for generic – but at the moment, it was obscuring Bella's body from my view and that just wouldn't do. I kicked my jeans all the way off and was about to make quick work of her panties, when I realized my door wasn't locked and angry music was still coming out of my speakers.

Bella looked confused as I pulled away and got up off the bed, but before she could ask any questions, I explained.

'I'm just going to make sure we're not interrupted, love.'

Quickly, I locked the door, then changed the music to a more romantic playlist. Yes, I had a playlist filled with love songs, inspired by and dedicated to Bella, so sue me. She may have been the virgin here, but this was as much a first for me, too. I had never been with someone I loved. I had never _made_ _love_ before. To say I was a little nervous would be an understatement.

I was gathering a couple of condoms from my dresser and turned back around towards Bella, when the first song came on, very accurately describing my feelings. I locked eyes with her, hoping the meaning of the lyrics wasn't lost on her.

_I'll be your dream, I'll be your wish, I'll be your fantasy_

_I'll be your hope, I'll be your love, be everything that you need_

_I'll love you more with every breath_

_Truly, madly, deeply…_

I would be whatever she needed me to be, just as she was everything I would ever need.

She sat up on her knees near the edge of the bed, reaching for me. Her pale skin stood out next to my black sheets. She was so beautiful… She looked at me with such love and trust in her eyes; I actually had to swallow the lump that was growing in my throat.

Between her lips bites, testifying to her innocence and vulnerability, the lust permeating the air and her tiny panties, I was spurred on and couldn't get back to her side fast enough. She pulled me to her and settled back again, while I stretched out across the bed, hastily dropping the condoms to the floor and careful to keep my weight off her. But apparently she wanted to feel me against her, because she wrapped her arms around my neck and hooked her left leg over my hip, while she deepened our kiss. I trailed my arm up her leg until I felt the edge of her panties. I pulled them slowly down, ridding her of her last piece of clothing.

Bella was in a little bit more of a hurry to get me naked, though, because she didn't even give me time to discard her underwear before she grabbed the waistband of my boxers, yanked them down and took a firm hold of me. I settled my legs between hers and felt the evidence of her arousal on my thigh.

_Damn, those panties must have been soaked!_

I got lost in kissing her again and the feel of her soft body under me. We kissed for a while longer, but when we both started to move our hips against each other, desperate for friction, and I feared I might slip inside, I pulled back and reached for a condom. Somehow, I was incredibly nervous, like I was fifteen again, like _I _was the virgin, and I struggled with the foil wrapper. Bella smiled and took it out of my hands with a sweet kiss, quickly tearing the packaging and extracting the condom, which she then handed back to me.

'I've only ever tried once, in Health Class, so…' she shrugged apologetically.

The comment reminded me of when I had Sex Ed in Health; when instructed to roll the condom onto the dummy, Jasper had scoffed and volunteered to be the dummy himself. Poor Mr. Banner had barely managed to stop him before he whipped it out.

I suppressed a chuckle, mentally berating myself.

_This is no time to be thinking about your best friend and pseudo-brother!_

'What?' Bella asked.

Apparently, I hadn't suppressed it entirely.

'Nothing, love, just a silly memory. I'll tell you some other time,' I said.

But then I realized she might not take it the way I intended. I mean, there's nothing worse than exposing yourself completely and then for the other person to start laughing – especially when they're more experienced. So I hurried to elaborate.

'It's just, what you said about Health Class… it reminded me of something that happened when I was in high school. It was funny but inappropriate. Honestly.'

'Oh, okay,' she responded.

I ended that particular conversation then by passionately kissing her, and sheathed myself in the uncomfortable latex.

Leaning on my left arm, I cupped her face in my right hand.

'Are you sure?' I asked her, because I wanted this to be on _her_ terms and not because she thought she had to do it for me.

She threaded her fingers through the hair at the nape of my neck.

'I'm ready, Edward.'

She pulled me to her and kissed me again, slipping her left arm around to my back. I gripped my cock in my left hand and positioned myself at her entrance.

'Please tell me if it hurts,' I implored.

The last thing I wanted was for her to be in pain. Bella nodded and bit her lip as I slowly pushed forward.

_Oh fuck! She felt so good! Hot and tight and soft and Bella…_

I tried to keep my eyes locked with hers, I really did, but I was afraid I would come instantly if I kept looking at her, with all the sensations already washing over me. When my hips were flush with hers and I was all the way in, I exhaled, only realizing then that I had been holding my breath, and opened my eyes to find Bella looking at me wide-eyed and breathing heavily. Time seemed to slow down as we looked at each other and I felt her all around me, all-consuming. At some point I heard the music change to a new song.

_You could be my unintended_

_Choice to live my life extended_

_You could be the one I'll always love_

Not only could she be that one, she _was_ that one.

Finally, I found my voice again.

'Are you okay?' I asked.

'Uhuh,' she answered, and squeezed her thighs around my waist in an attempt to move.

Although I was glad I hadn't hurt her – yet – I was hesitant to start moving, not quite trusting myself that I wouldn't move too fast or be too rough with her in my excitement.

'Edward, I'm fine,' Bella pleaded. 'But I need you to move. You feel _so good_ already,' she moaned. 'Please, give me more.'

That was all the confirmation I needed, and I slowly extracted my cock from her body, until only the tip was left inside of her. When I pushed back in again, I had to fight to keep my eyes from crossing. The feeling was exquisite.

When I was assured that Bella wasn't uncomfortable or in pain, I wrapped my arm around her waist, pulling her close, then trailed my hand down to grip her perfect ass, slightly changing the angle at which I was entering her. I went deeper this way and she arched her back in response. As the speed of my thrusts increased I felt my orgasm rapidly approaching, but Bella wouldn't let me slow down to prolong the experience as she matched the rhythm of my hips with her own. I tried to keep our gazes locked for as long as possible, but eventually it was all too much for me to take and I dropped my head onto her shoulder, burying my face into her hair, hearing her pants and soft moans in my ear, which only served to urge me on. It only took a few more thrusts before I couldn't hold on anymore and let go, squeezing her to me tightly and released with a shudder, moaning her name.

I stayed like that until my heartbeat started to slow down a little, then pulled out and rolled over onto my side, taking Bella with me. I wasn't letting go of her, needed to feel her skin against mine. She looked up at me, a lazy smile gracing her angelic features. I cupped her chin and leaned down to kiss her. I loved holding her close to me like that, knowing she trusted me, loved me, and wanted me as much as I wanted her.

'I love you,' I whispered against her lips.

'I love you, too,' she answered.

As much as I longed to stay in bed with her until at least morning, I needed to get rid of the condom. Bella protested a little when I got up, but I promised I wouldn't be long.

'Okay. I'll just go get my stuff fromAlice's room, then,' she said.

She got up from the bed, picked my shirt off the floor and pulled it on. Seeing her in my shirt brought back memories of the night we met. The sight had been an incredible turn-on even back then, when she had just been a cute girl I had helped out. Then more recently, her wearing my old jersey… My name across her back - knowing she liked showing that off - it really stirred something deep down inside of me, bordering on possessiveness. But now that the context had changed, and she wasn't wearing anything underneath, with the sex hair to prove it… that was even more amazing. I closed a few of the buttons for her. Thankfully, the shirt was long enough that she was sufficiently covered.

'Hurry back to me,' I said as she walked out the door.

After I had cleaned myself up, I put my underwear back on and sat down on my bed to wait for Bella. When she hadn't come back after ten minutes – which felt like hours – I started to get a little anxious, worrying thatAlicemight have persuaded her to sleep in her room.

'Who is it?' Alice sang as I knocked on her door.

'It's Edward. Can you open the door?'

I was met with the very amused face of my sister.

'Impatient much, brother dear?' she teased.

'Is Bella here?' I asked, not even bothering to answer her.

Of course I was impatient for Bella to return to my room! She of all people should understand my need to be with her now.

'Relax, Edward,' she laughed. 'I'm just messing with you a little. She's right here. Sorry I kept her so long, but we needed to talk for a bit.'

'That's just awesome, Ali, but if you don't mind, I'm taking my girlfriend back to _my_ room now,' I said as I stalked across the room toward Bella, who had just picked up her overnight bag and a garment bag.

I didn't even wait for her to follow me out of the room; instead I picked her up and threw her over my shoulder, causing her to shriek and giggle, and rushed us back to my room, where I plopped her down onto my bed. I put her two bags onto my couch, quickly locked the door again and joined Bella in bed. She was still laughing at my antics and I relished this carefree mood. I ghosted feather light kisses across her skin, before she pulled my mouth to hers.

I fell asleep with my face buried in her neck, holding her tightly, as she ran her hand through my hair and caressed the arm I had around her.


	37. The morning after

**Disclaimer: I forgot to add one to the last chapter, but this applies to the entire story: I'm just playing with AH versions of the characters Stephenie Meyer came up with. No copyright infringement intended. However, it would be appreciated if no one would copy my story as their own, too.**

**A/N Songs from the last chapter: **_**Truly madly deeply**_** by Savage Garden and **_**Unintended**_** by Muse.**

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**3****7. The morning after**

Last night was… incredible! We went from emotional outburst, to my confession of love to Edward, to being together at last, completely together, the way I had been longing to.

I'd had sex with Edward.

No, more so: Edward had _made love_ to me.

And he had been so amazingly sweet about it, checking if I was absolutely sure, before filling me so completely I thought I would cry. Not because it hurt, because it didn't. He was so careful with me; it made me feel even more loved. But when he was inside me, it just… triggered everything.

I knew I loved him, but this new connection only served to intensify that feeling.

He was holding back a little at first, I could see it in the way he was squeezing his eyes shut tightly, the way he was breathing heavily and the way the muscles in his arms were trembling with the effort of holding still. But I needed more. I needed him to move, to allow his passion to surface completely. When he was sufficiently assured that he wasn't hurting me, he finally let go some more and started to move in earnest, holding me close to him and thrusting in a most delicious rhythm…

Sometime during the night I had woken up sprawled across Edward's chest. I wasn't sure what it was that had woken me, but when I realized where I was and under what circumstances, I smiled against his chest and moved my hand to trace along his jaw. I hitched up my leg and only noticed then that we were both barely dressed; Edward in his boxers and me in his shirt. With the new position my leg was in, I became instantly aware of his body's reaction to my proximity and the friction my movements created. I squirmed a little against him and he stirred, tightening his hold on me and mumbling my name in his sleep.

I decided to have a little fun with him and try something new, so I moved until I was entirely on top of him, my legs on either side of his body. I opened my eyes, letting them adjust to the relative darkness, and ghosted my hands over Edward's chest. His abs flexed at my touch and his nipples hardened as I brushed my thumbs over them. I leaned in to softly bite and lick them, before kissing a trail up toward his lips. When I reached them, he immediately kissed me back, his tongue requesting access to my mouth.

'How long have you been awake?' I whispered.

'When you started to bite me.'

'I didn't hurt you, did I?'

'Not at all. I actually quite liked it,' he said as he bucked his hips, emphasizing his statement.

I stifled a moan and managed to croak out, 'Is that so?'

I could hear the smirk in his voice as he answered, 'I can show you that better than I can tell you.'

He unfastened the buttons of the shirt and pushed it open. Sitting up, he moved his mouth to one of my nipples, licking and sucking at first, before gently biting down. He eased the sting of his teeth with another swipe of his tongue and left me torn between the two feelings; pain and pleasure. Or pleasurable pain. Something like that. When he repeated his actions on my other nipple, I fisted my hands in his hair and held him to me, panting heavily. He chuckled, his lips still on my breast, then pulled away to speak, but before he could do so I kissed him hungrily and pushed myself closer to him.

He took my shirt off in its entirety, leaving me naked on his lap, his erection straining against the fabric of his boxers. I reached down and hooked my fingers in the waistband, freeing him from his confines as he lifted his hips to help me pull them down. He then tried to flip us over, but I wasn't having any of that, so I resisted. His expression shifted from confusion to lust filled excitement as he realized what I was getting at. I reached for a condom and scooted back on his thighs, giving me room to help him put it on. Without words, he grabbed hold of my hips and helped me sink down onto him. I groaned as his thickness stretched me and I noticed Edward was biting his lip and struggling to keep his eyes open when I started rocking on his lap. That had happened the first time, too. I stilled my movements and he looked at me, a little frustrated.

'Baby, what's wrong?'

'Nothing's _wrong_. It's just… I want to keep looking at you… but you feel _so_ good… I can barely contain myself.'

I grinned rather smugly. I mean, this was only my second time, and here he was, telling me I was pretty much knocking him off his senses.

'You like that, don't you?'

I nodded. Of course I did. I also liked teasing him like this, like he had been teasing me before.

'Of… c-course,' I stuttered when he bucked his hips, hitting a most delicious spot deep inside of me. 'I don't want you… to hold back... _Oh yes…_ Just… let go,' I moaned.

And let go he did. Just not of me. He gripped my hips even harder, his fingers digging into my flesh as he thrust harder and faster, continuing to hit that spot that sent tingles through my entire body. I was so close, so incredibly close this time… I hadn't come during our first time, but that was to be expected. This time, though, I was a little more adjusted to how he filled me, and it felt amazing. I leaned back a little, resting a hand on his leg while keeping the other wrapped around his neck. He moved one of his hands from my hip to where we were joined and started rubbing tight circles in time with his thrusts. That was all it took to set me off and I cried out his name as I came all around him. I could actually feel him even more now, as my muscles squeezed his cock that was still moving inside me.

When I was able to focus on my surroundings again, specifically, Edward holding me, both of his hands were back on my hips and he was thrusting even more forcefully. His hold on me was almost painful, but I didn't care. It meant that he loved me and was lost in the sensation. His eyes were screwed shut tightly and his jaw was set in concentration. When he threw his head back, I could see the tendons and veins in his neck, all taut and tense. He pulled me down as he thrust up and after a few more strong strokes, he groaned loudly and let out a string of expletives.

And now I found myself waking up in Edward's arms, much like when he had spent the night at Emmett's after our fight, but with at least one major difference. This time, we were both naked. And I wouldn't have it any other way. I didn't even mind the soreness I was starting to feel throughout my body. The reason for it was well worth it.

Remembering all the mind-blowing details of the night before, I sighed happily and snuggled a little closer into his embrace. My back was against his chest, his arm around my waist and his hand seemingly subconsciously fondling one of my breasts. I tried feigning sleep for a little while longer, wanting this moment to last. But apparently, Edward was waking up, too, because I felt him harden against my butt as his lips skimmed my shoulder and neck and the movements of his fingers became more deliberate. I hummed in appreciation. In response, he moved my hair back from my neck, kissed me softly behind my ear, and whispered, 'Best night ever.'

I smiled, my eyes still closed.

Moving his lips to the crook of my neck, he added, 'Thank you.'

I tilted my head back so I could see his face. He looked so relaxed and genuinely happy; it was a complete one-eighty of the night before, when I had first come to his room. It warmed my heart, and I couldn't help but smile up at him.

'I love you so much, Bella,' he spoke sincerely.

I turned a little more so I could reach up my hand to tenderly stroke his face.

'I love you, too, Edward.'

We lay like that for a while, before I spoke up again.

'How are you feeling?'

He grinned at me happily, 'Like I said: best night ever.'

When I blushed – I mean, it was obvious he was talking about more than the quality of his sleep – he elaborated.

'Well, for one, I got to hold you all night. I didn't lie awake, didn't sleep restlessly… And then I woke up with you in my arms… It can't get any better than that.'

I couldn't agree more; if I could I would spend every night with him. But his mention of previous sleepless nights had me worried.

'Do you have trouble sleeping usually?'

'Not all the time, but… yeah.'

'Because of your mom?'

He closed his eyes, swallowed hard and nodded.

'Oh honey, I'm so sorry…'

'It's okay, B. It's what it is. But with you, I'm better.'

'Maybe we should make this a more permanent thing then.'

I was only half joking. His smile grew impossibly large.

'That would be… wow, I can't even…' he stammered. 'We can't, though,' he pouted when reality struck.

'Not _all_ the time,' I offered. 'But I can sneak in here, and you can come over when I'm staying at Em's…'

He looked hopeful again and kissed me.

'I'm sorry I was such a jerk last night,' he started. 'You helped me with that, too.'

This was the perfect moment to bring up something I had been wanting to talk to him about.

'That's what I'm here for, Edward. But, uhm… that's also why it took so long in Alice's room last night.'

I proceeded to tell him about my conversation with her.

When she had opened her door, she had at first squealed in excitement about my obvious state of undress and apparently one raging case of sex hair. But then she had quickly turned the conversation around and asked about his moody behavior after Carlisle's announcement.

'They tried to hide it, but Dad and Esme were really upset. Does he think he's the only one who loved Mom?'

'It's not like that Ali. He feels terrible about the way he reacted. It's hard for him.'

She had huffed, stating that it was difficult for all of them, but he needed to deal with it.

'I know,' he sighed. 'And I am. I'm just… I don't know. I love Esme, she's amazing. And logically I know she won't replace Mom, but…'

I understood. He didn't want to forget her and was irrationally afraid he might if he showed his happiness about the new situation.

'Maybe it'll help if you do something special to commemorate her?' I suggested.

His face lightened up at that.

'That's perfect, B! And I know just the thing to do.'

'You do?' I asked, surprised.

Just a minute ago he was all morose, not knowing his way out of this ostensible impasse, and now he already had a solution?

'Yes. I've been thinking about getting another tattoo, but I wasn't sure about the design. It should mean something, you know? But maybe I could get one for my Mom.'

'You want to get a tattoo for your mother.'

He nodded, already excited about this idea.

'Actually, that _is_ kind of perfect.'

'Do you really think so?' he asked eagerly.

'I do. It would be a great statement. Very permanent. Not to mention it would look hot on you!'

He smirked, 'You like tattoos?'

'I like the right tattoo on the right person. But on you? Yes, definite turn-on.'

I wasn't even embarrassed to say it out loud. His current one was beautiful and gave him an extra edge. I could only imagine how any additional ones would look on him.

'So, what kind of design are you thinking of?'

He leaned back against his pillow, thoughtful for a moment, and I rolled over, leaning on my elbow so I could look at him.

'Well, I'm not going to get something tacky, like a heart with a banner and _MOM_ in large letters.'

I made a face. That would be atrocious.

'I'm thinking, something that's significant to her and me. Something about the piano, maybe?' he pondered.

He then looked back at me and explained, his hand drawing lazy patterns on my back, 'She taught me how to play. She used to be a professional pianist, but after I was born she became a teacher instead. We would play together a lot and when she got sick I always played for her. Her favorite piece was…'

'_Claire de lune_,' I finished his sentence. 'Alice told me. She said you're playing again?'

He blushed a little when he nodded.

'Will you play for me sometime?'

'I'd love to,' he said as he kissed me.

'What do you think of sheet music?' he asked after a while.

'Uhm, it's useful?' I shrugged, not really understanding his apparent change of topic.

'No, baby,' he laughed now. 'I meant as a tattoo.'

'You mean sheet music of _Claire de lune_?'

'Yeah. Not the entire thing, obviously, but maybe the opening bars of it.'

'Depends. What would it look like?'

'Well, I'd have to go to the shop to get a definite design, but I was thinking of having it flow a bit, like a flag, you know?'

'And where do you want it?'

'I'm not sure. My pec? So it's close to my heart?'

I frowned a little at the suggestion.

'No?'

'I don't know… There's just something about tattoos there that irks me. And the way you described the design, I'd put it on a spot that allows for that kind of movement.'

He smiled at me indulgently, 'What do you suggest then?'

I thought about that for a while as my fingers trailed over his abs.

'You could have it wrap around your forearm…' I started.

'I'm not sure about that. It would be kind of big to cover up if I'd need to.'

'Alright. How about your hip? Have it start above your right hip and then float down with the…' I stopped, blushing a little at where my thoughts were taking me.

'With the what?'

I was going to sound like one of those girls that shamelessly drooled over him if I would say it. No way was I embarrassing myself like that. So instead, I pointed the location out on his body; starting above his hip and following the line of the V created by his hipbone. I stopped before I reached his cock and traced back up the same path, outlining the spot.

Edward looked at me wide-eyed and said huskily, 'I like that.'

Now it was my turn to swallow thickly, as I took note of the increasing sexual tension and his growing erection, which lay trapped between our bodies.

'Can I come with you?' I asked in an attempt to keep our conversation going a little while longer.

He raised an eyebrow questioningly.

'When you get it done?'

'Sure,' he said. 'If you don't mind needles and stuff or being bored out of your mind while they're working on me.'

'Not at all. Actually, I really want to see how it's done. I've been thinking about getting one myself, so when I turn eighteen…' I let the sentence drift off.

He gulped audibly, 'You want to get a tattoo? What? And where?'

'Not sure what yet. I want it to have a special meaning. But maybe something small on my wrist… I still have some time to think of something. What?' I asked, because he was gazing at me with a look of intense concentration on his face.

'The thought of you… with ink… is such a huge turn-on! And I think a larger one, like a side piece…' he said as he trailed his fingers over my ribcage and down to the inside of my hip, making me shiver in anticipation. 'That would look incredibly hot on you!'

'Are you serious? I'm, like, tiny! That would be huge on me!'

'It can be intricate and feminine. And the contrast would only make it more spectacular. Trust me, it would look stunning on you!'

I promised him I would keep it in mind. Like I said, it would still be another nine months before I would be doing anything in that respect.

After that, we lost ourselves in countless kisses and tender touches, both of which quickly turned more heated. Edward rolled me onto my side and lay down behind me after sheathing himself in a condom. He started kissing and sucking on my neck and shoulder as he let his fingers travel down my side and across my stomach down to where I was aching for him in the most delicious of ways. He teased me there for a minute before his hand moved further down my leg. When he reached my knee, he paused and hitched it up over his leg. In one swift move he slid inside me and I gasped at the sudden fullness. He continued to hold me leg in place as he started to move in a slow, languid rhythm. Hooking my foot behind his calf, I moved his hand back up, letting him know where I wanted him to touch me, then reached up to tangle my fingers through his crazy bronze locks, which were even more disheveled than usual.

Suddenly, there was a knock on the door and we both froze. We stayed quiet, hoping that whoever it was would think Edward was still asleep and leave, so we could carry on.

Of course, that didn't happen.

_Knock knock knock._

'Yo, lil' E, can I come in for a minute? It's important,' Jasper called.

'I'm kind of busy,' Edward called back, rolling his eyes at me while still gently rolling his hips against my butt.

'I figured as much,' Jasper answered, the smile evident in his voice. 'That's why you need to let me in. It's about that.'

My eyes rolled back because of Edward's shallow thrusts and I couldn't hold back a moan.

'I'm serious, dude, open the door,' Jasper kept on knocking.

Edward groaned and nipped at my shoulder before speaking.

'I'm so sorry, love. I think he's serious…'

He pulled out and kissed me before getting out of bed and making his way over to the door as he put on his discarded boxers, not even bothering to remove the condom. With an exasperated sigh he opened his door and let Jasper in.

'Dude, are you kidding me?' he snickered. 'Put that thing away! You can poke someone's eye out with it. Morning, Bells.'

I mumbled a greeting while pulling the sheets tight around me. The last thing I needed was to give him a free show.

'What's so important it couldn't wait, Jazz?' Edward asked.

'Mom's got brunch almost ready and Carlisle came to see if everyone was up. Alice told him Bella was already in her shower and I offered to wake you up. I figured they don't know about this yet?' he explained as he motioned between us.

Even though I was grateful and appreciated his thought-process, I was mortified. Not only had Jasper pretty much walked in on us in the act and was I still very much naked underneath the sheet I was now desperately clutching to my chest, but he had also come to warn us since we had obviously been too preoccupied to notice anything outside of our little bubble.

'Don't worry, Bells,' he interrupted my panicked train of thought. 'Ali was very convincing. You've got about half an hour before they come looking for you again.'

With that, he nodded at me and clapped Edward on the back before leaving the room again.

'Was that as awkward for you as it was for me?' Edward chuckled as he rubbed the back of his neck.

I just shrugged.

He walked back over to the bed and reached out a hand for me.

'Come on, let's go shower.'

I took his outstretched hand and let the sheet fall to the mattress. He hurried to shed his boxers again and I cocked an eyebrow at him, because, despite Jasper's interruption, he was still rock hard and looking at me with hooded eyes.

'I'm not done with you yet, little girl,' he smirked at me. 'I need to make you come at least once more before we face our family.'

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**A/N No disrespect meant to people with the kind of tattoos I described as being tacky in this chapter. It's Edward and Bella's conversation and even though I personally don't like those ****kinds of tattoos, it eventually boils down to one's own feelings and opinions about the matter. I know there are people who don't like the ones I have and I respect that.**

**Also, this story is drawing to a close. I'm hoping to finish it before I leave for Australia early July.**


	38. Let's talk about sex

**Disclaimer: As usual, Stephenie Meyer gave us the characters. I just put them in my own little story. Anything recognizable belongs to their respective owners and no copyright infringement is intended.**

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**38. ****Let's talk about sex**

Lifted up against the shower wall, the cool tiles against my back, the heat of Edward's body everywhere else, I was convinced there was nothing better to wake up to than this. Edward's strong arms were holding me up as his mouth was working miracles on my skin. He was thrusting up into me forcefully as I felt a pleasurable tightening form all throughout my body.

This was bordering on insanity! We had explored each other's bodies before and yes, I had barely been able to keep my hands off him at any given time. But now that I knew what it was like to actually have sex with Edward… I was near insatiable. And judging on his reactions to me, so was he.

After our shower – and one speedy job of washing my hair – I noticed Edward looking at me with a pained expression on his face as I rummaged through my bag in search of clean underwear, but when he realized I had seen him, he quickly averted his eyes and tried to appear casual.

'Edward?' I asked. 'What is it?'

He walked over to me, guilt written all over his face, and turned me towards the mirror on the door to his closet.

'Look,' he said.

I did, but didn't find anything out of the ordinary. Yes, I was stark naked, Edward standing behind me in his underwear, my hair was dripping wet and my face was a little flushed, but other than that, I looked fine to me. I locked eyes with him in the mirror, silently asking him to tell me what was bothering him. He put his left hand on my waist and used his right to pull my hair back over my shoulder.

'Look,' he repeated.

I focused on where his fingers rested on my neck and noticed a red mark on the junction between my neck and shoulder. Then I remembered our passionate lovemaking the night before.

'You bit me?' I wondered.

He closed his eyes and hung his head in shame, before letting his hands drift down my sides to my legs.

'I hurt you,' he whispered.

True enough, there were several bruises along my hips and thighs. I prodded one and took note of the discoloration. It didn't hurt, though, but I could see why he would think so.

'Edward,' I said.

When he didn't look up, I turned around and cupped his face in my hands, forcing him to make eye contact.

'It's fine,' I said, but he started to disagree. 'Edward, shut up!'

Blazing green eyes locked with mine, challenging me to prove him wrong.

'You didn't hurt me. If you had, I would have said so at the time. In case you forgot: I bruise easily. I'm pale and clumsy; I'm always covered in bruises, and half the time I don't even remember what caused them. These… sex bruises are the best kind of bruises. Please don't worry about hurting me, baby. I don't want you to hold back because you think you need to be careful. I love you and I loved the way you made love to me last night and this morning. Okay?'

'Are you sure?' he questioned.

'Yes! Please, don't beat yourself up over something you didn't do wrong.'

'If you say so,' he conceded hesitantly.

'I do. Now kiss me and let's get dressed.'

Luckily, the dress I had picked out for the day covered all of the marks Edward had left on my body. Well, except for my swollen red lips, but I just put some gloss on them instead. They actually looked nice and pouty like that. My dress was pretty simple: black, velvety and short, with long sleeves and a wide neckline that left my left shoulder bare. I paired it with black leggings and the same boots I had worn the night before. Yes, I was dressed in all black, but we were going to Charlie's office party later and I figured it would be better to dress more conservatively for that occasion. I hurriedly applied some black kohl and smudged it for a smokey effect, before finishing with lots of mascara. There wasn't really enough time left to dry and style my hair, so I just put it in a messy bun so it could dry in waves and twists. While I was doing that, Edward was busy fixing his tie. He looked devilishly handsome in his dark blue suit, crisp white shirt and matching skinny tie. I had forbidden him to shave and scratched the scruff on his jaw appreciatively before kissing him chastely.

When we got downstairs, Alice pulled me aside and informed me she had covered for me, but that Esme had asked us to help her bring out brunch. We would be eating in the living room, allowing gifts to be exchanged simultaneously.

'Good morning, sweetheart,' Esme, in a flowing prune and lavender V-neck dress, greeted me upon entering the kitchen.

She immediately handed Alice a stack of plates to take into the living room.

'What can I do?' I asked.

'You can take out the bread in a minute, but first, I want you to be honest with me.'

I gulped, knowing full well what she meant.

'I know you slept in Edward's room last night. Don't worry, Carlisle and I know better than to forbid you to. I only ask two things, and they're the same things we asked of Jasper and Alice. One – that you are safe and responsible; and two – that you won't sneak around about it anymore. Is that clear?'

I breathed a sigh of relief and nodded.

'Good. Now that that's sorted, why don't you take out the bread and coffee and make yourself comfortable?'

I sat down next to Edward on the couch and whispered in his ear, 'Esme knows.'

'I know,' he replied. 'So does Dad. He was cool about it, though.'

Our conversation was cut short when Esme brought out the last of brunch and Emmett and Rosalie came in moments later. My brother looked very smart in his fitting grey suit with a blue tie, and Rosalie was stunning in a nude long-sleeved dress with a wide V-neck and black and silver print along the edges.

When everyone was seated and supplied with coffee, Edward cleared his throat.

'Before we get started, there's something I need to say. Dad, Esme, I'm so sorry for the way I acted last night. I was out of line and you didn't deserve that. There were some things I had to come to terms with, but I shouldn't have taken it out on you. I truly am happy for you both and, Dad, I'd be honored to stand up with you as your best man.'

Esme clutched her hands to her chest, tears in her eyes, as Edward and Carlisle embraced. Carlisle then came over to me and pulled me into a hug as he softly spoke his gratitude.

'I don't know what you did exactly, but you gave me my son back and I can't thank you enough for that.'

I choked up at the sincerity in his voice and could only nod as he pulled back. Only then did I realize that Edward's pain and his way of dealing with it must have been exceptionally hard on Carlisle, too. Not only had he lost his wife and the mother of his children, but he had also had to deal with his son's lashing out by means of reckless behavior and shutting everyone out emotionally. Even I had noticed the recent changes in Edward, but, as Alice had already pointed out, they were even more apparent to the others.

'Now,' Carlisle proceeded more cheerfully. 'Let's eat and open presents. Merry Christmas, everyone.'

At that, the room became a flurry of activity as people started passing out gifts and food. Esme was delighted with the colorful, personalized coffee mugs we had gotten her. When put in order, they spelled out _CULLEN_, and they all had a different image on the other side. Alice surprised me with a pair of pink Iron Fist Muerte Punk Princess peeptoe pumps. I had been looking at them longingly when I saw them online a few weeks before, but hadn't gotten around to buying them yet. My black boots were quickly replaced with the new shoes. Rosalie had gotten me a Santeria handbag to go with them. Edward started laughing when Emmett opened one of his gifts.

'Dude, did you get one of Rosalie's by accident?'

'No!' my brother exclaimed gleefully. 'I love me some _Gilmore Girls_. Thanks, Jazz!'

Jasper smiled in response, but was quickly distracted when Alice opened his gift to her. She gasped when she held the little black velvet box in her hands and all eyes focused on the exchange.

'Jazzy…' she whispered, tearing up.

'Go ahead, open it,' he encouraged her.

She popped the lid and clasped a hand over her mouth.

'Is this…?' she started to ask, but Jasper interrupted her.

'A promise ring. No offence to anyone here, but when I do, I'm not going to propose to you in a room full of people. This is just a symbol of my love for you.'

'It's beautiful,' she squeaked out. 'Thank you.'

My own vision became a bit blurred by tears as I witnessed their love and happiness. After Jasper had slid the ring onto the third finger of her right hand and they had shared a sweet kiss, I motioned for her to come over so I could have a look at it. The ring was beautiful; a narrow silver band with a princess cut aquamarine surrounded by tiny diamonds to give it the shape of a heart.

I immediately recognized the jewelry box Esme gave to Carlisle – containing gold cuff links engraved with the Cullen family crest – because it came from the same jeweler where Edward and I had bought the bull and bear cuff links for Emmett. When I noticed Jasper opening my gift to him, I paid special attention, hoping he would like it. Alice had assured me he would, but I wanted to see for myself that the book about blunders in world history had been the right gift for him. It was, and he flipped through it, delighted about some of the selected events.

For Alice I had picked up an assortment of bath products from Rituals, since I knew she loved those, and Rosalie was thrilled with her gift certificate for a spa treatment. Emmett proved he could be romantic as well as a goofball when his gift for his girlfriend consisted of a pair of beautiful white gold chandelier earrings set with blue topaz and garnet.

One of the last presents Edward opened was the one from me and I anxiously studied his face, waiting for his reaction. I really hadn't known what to get him, so I ended up buying him a black leather cuff bracelet with large chains around it, because I thought it would look rather sinful on his wrist. It came in a small box, wrapped around a little cushion, and I had put a card in with it, speaking of my affections for him, even if I hadn't been able to call it love yet when I wrote it. He opened it, carefully read the card, a watery smile on his face, then studied the bracelet – I had his initials _EAMC_ engraved on the clasp – before holding it out to me.

'It's perfect, love. Will you help me put it on?'

I attached it to his right wrist and when I was done, he cupped my face in his hands and kissed me.

'I love you, Bella, thank you,' he said, and I knew he was talking about more than just my present. 'Now, open my gift to you.'

He handed me a small rectangular box and three smaller square ones.

'Those are from your brother, my dad and Jasper,' he pointed out. 'And they go with my gift.'

I opened the larger box first. In it was a silver charm bracelet, with one charm already attached to it: a silver lock and key, the key adorned with diamonds, and pink tourmaline embedded in the lock, with a heart-shaped amethyst in its center. Edward turned it around to show me the engraving: _You hold the key to my heart – E._

'Edward,' I choked out, overcome with emotion. 'It's beautiful! Thank you.'

I moved to put it on, but he stopped me and motioned toward the other boxes. Right, the corresponding gifts. I opened them to find a charm in the shape of the Seattle Space Needle from Jasper, a silver _E_ with Emmett's date of birth engraved on its back and a shooting star with pink tourmaline and diamonds in its tail from Carlisle. I thanked them all for the beautiful gifts, attached them to the bracelet and had Edward put it on my wrist.

I couldn't help but glance down at it from time to time, thinking about how lucky I was.

When the remnants of brunch and our gift exchange were cleared from the living room, it was time to go over to Charlie's office for his company's Christmas party. Why they had to have it on Christmas Day was beyond me, but apparently it was an important event in Seattle society and we were all required to attend. Carlisle and Esme, both being very well-respected within the Seattle elite, had also been invited. Edward and I rode with Emmett and Rosalie, my bags already in the trunk so I could go home with them after the party, as Alice and Jasper got in their parents' car. I guess we were being economic. During the drive over, I remembered something Emmett had told me when I had just moved to Seattle.

'Hey Rose, weren't you supposed to be in Texas now?'

At my question, everyone in the car tensed up. Had I said something wrong? I hurried to explain my question.

'Don't get me wrong, I love having you around, but Emmett told me when I moved here that I wouldn't meet Jasper yet, because he was visiting your father, and you'd be going over there for Christmas and New Year's…'

Edward squeezed my leg as he whispered reassuringly, 'Don't worry, love, it's just a sensitive topic for everyone.'

But Rosalie seemed to have composed herself enough to pipe up, 'No, it's okay. She might as well know what's going on.'

She then turned around and addressed me.

'The sperm donor couldn't be bothered to take time off from work for my visit and suggested I spend the week with his new tramp of a girlfriend. She's twenty-fucking-nine and thinks she needs to be _besties_ with me,' she sneered. 'I politely declined so he wanted to send a check instead. I told him to buy me some Louboutins. New collection. If he wants to buy my affections, he might as well dig deep. Jazz got an I-Pad.'

I couldn't blame her for her reaction and tone of voice, but I did spot a glimpse of pain behind her tough façade. As much as I hated my current stressful relationship with Charlie, it was infinitely better than what Rosalie and Jasper had with their father. Emmett had told me how he had pretty much abandoned them after the divorce – though he had barely been there for them to start with – settling for sending a hefty allowance every month and having them fly out to Texas from time to time. During one of those visits, before Emmett had met her, she had been charmed by one of his friends' sons. They had gone out a few times and she had been enjoying herself. When he had wanted more and had forced himself upon her, she had only barely managed to fight him off, but when she had told her father, he had brushed her accusations off as childish overreactions, saying, 'Mr. King's son wouldn't do such a vile thing.' Can you believe, a father choosing his daughter's attacker's side over her own? Rosalie had taken the first available flight out and had never gone back alone.

'I'm so glad Mom's finally marrying Carlisle!' she continued. 'He's such a great guy! And he's been a better father to me and Jazz than the douche bag has ever been. Hey Eddie, would it be really weird if I were to call him Dad? I sort of want to, you know?'

Edward leaned forward, hugging her from around her seat, and kissed her cheek.

'Not at all. I think he'd be thrilled. You're like a daughter to him and I already consider you my sister.'

In the rearview mirror, I saw Emmett furiously biting his lip in an attempt to keep his composure. I soothingly patted his shoulder, where he clasped my hand in his.

Shortly after that, we arrived at the venue and handed the car to the valet to be parked. Once inside, we were greeted by a hostess of the venue, who introduced herself as Chelsea and ushered us to the cloakroom after she pointed us in the direction of the room where the actual party was taking place.

In the car I had pulled my hair out of the bun and fluffed it a little. Edward, in a very gentlemanly gesture, helped me out of my coat and snuck in a kiss on my exposed shoulder, making me shiver. We didn't know yet how meeting Charlie again would fare, so before we entered the main room, he stole a quick yet heated kiss, grabbing my butt in the process. Emmett apparently saw that and finally connected some of the dots, because he hissed accusingly.

'You had sex!'

Edward started spluttering; he was still pretty intimidated by my big brother, but I had grown tired of that and spat out a smart-assed comment.

'No shit, Sherlock,' I said and rolled my eyes.

Rosalie giggled at the interaction and tugged Emmett through the door, effectively putting an end to his supposedly offended reaction to the revelation.

The party was quite nice: the room was tastefully decorated, jazzy Christmas music was being played by a band, people were mingling and dancing and waiters were going around offering drinks and hors d'oeuvres. I snagged two glasses of something clear and sparkly off a tray and offered one to Edward, who looked rather bemused.

'What? It's a party; I might as well enjoy myself a little. Especially considering who we're about to meet.'

He didn't get a chance to respond, because Renee had spotted us and came rushing over.

'Bella, sweetie, you made it!'

I quickly gulped down my drink and turned to greet her. By the time she had finished hugging Edward and embarrassing me, Carlisle and Esme had joined us.

'How was your dinner last night?' Esme enquired politely.

'Oh, it was absolutely magnificent!' Renee exclaimed. 'Such a thoughtful gift of the children… Thank you so much for having Bella over, though. I'd have hated for her to have spent the evening alone, since we were out quite late,' she giggled.

She then winked at Esme, while I blushed crimson. If only she knew.

'Oh, it was our pleasure,' Esme insisted. 'Bella is a wonderful girl and she's always welcome in our home.'

Thankfully, Renee changed the subject after that.

'I really must introduce you to my husband. Follow me; he was standing near the tree earlier.'

We all followed dutifully after her, me dragging my steps a little. This was it; the cat would be out of the bag.

'Charles, darling?' Renee cooed, obviously trying to come across as distinguished at such an official function. 'There are some people I'd like you to meet.'

When she had secured his attention and I had snuck in a quick 'Hi, Daddy,' from beside her, which he thankfully answered with a smile, she motioned toward Carlisle.

'This is Dr. Carlisle Cullen. He's the Chief of surgery at Harborview, and Bella's friend Alice's father. And you remember Rosalie's mother? Esme Hale…'

'Soon to be Cullen,' Esme finished proudly while extending her hand to shake Charlie's.

'You're engaged?' Renee asked. 'What wonderful news! Congratulations!'

Both sets of parents exchanged pleasantries for a moment, but I could already see realization dawn in Charlie. He didn't get the chance to call me out on it yet, though, because soon Alice danced over to us, the others in tow.

'Alice, don't you look positively adorable today,' Renee gushed.

And she did. She was wearing a dangerously short black petticoat skirt with tights and the Sergio Rossi heels she had worn the night before. Her fitted grey blazer was given a twist by the long black scarf she had tied around her torso artfully.

'Thanks, Renee,' she answered. 'And may I say Zac Posen really becomes you?'

Moving over from a now blushing Renee, she addressed Charlie.

'Merry Christmas, Mr. Swan. It's a great party! Have you met my Jasper yet?'

She pushed him forward and he extended his hand, which Charlie took.

'Jasper Hale. It's a pleasure, sir.' At Charlie's confused expression, he elaborated, 'I'm Rosalie's twin brother.'

'Right,' Charlie said. 'Emmett has spoken of you before. Nice to meet you, kid.'

Rosalie, knowing I was planning on revealing mine and Edward's relationship, then moved in and greeted Renee with a hug and Charlie with a kiss on the cheek, charming him. After that, she pulled Edward to the opposite side of the room, claiming she wanted to introduce him to one of her professors, who was in attendance. I gathered all the courage I could find and moved to stand beside Charlie.

'So, Daddy…' I started, fingering the strap of my new purse.

'Cullen, huh?' he interrupted me. 'How long were you planning on keeping this from me?'

'We were going to tell you today, Daddy, I swear.'

'Isabella, I don't like being lied to, and I particularly don't like being thwarted or taken for a fool. I told you he's too old for you and…'

'But, Daddy, he's only a little older than me, and it doesn't bother us. And I didn't lie to you; I just didn't tell you everything.'

'If I may offer some perspective, Charles,' Carlisle spoke up. 'Isabella is very mature and responsible. We've seen her with Edward and their relationship is equal and consensual.'

'Be that as it may, your daughter and your son are together and under your roof…' Charlie insinuated.

'I know what you mean,' Carlisle responded. 'We've spoken with them about that and have agreed upon some ground rules. Truthfully, I'd rather have them be honest about their relationship than thinking they need to sneak around. Surely you can agree with that?'

He was taken aback a little at Carlisle's reasoning, which allowed for Emmett to join the conversation.

'Dad, I was about as happy about this as you were at first, but if you give Eddie a chance, you'll see he's nothing but good to Bells. He really loves her.'

'I can vouch for that,' Renee added. 'And I've only seen them together a handful of times. They make the cutest couple, really! That boy is absolutely smitten with her.'

I blushed at everything that was being said about Edward and me, but was also glad it was being said and confirmed by everyone. I was going to be with Edward regardless, but I didn't want to fight with Charlie over him or worry about him finding out.

'You're all in on this, aren't you?' he asked, a little dejectedly.

He was met with shrugs and sheepish grins. He weighed his options for a minute before sighing.

'Fine. I won't stop you from seeing him. But if he messes up, I'll know where to find him. Have him come over for dinner this week and we'll take it from there.'

I tried to keep my composure, but inside I was squealing and jumping up and down like an excited child. I didn't try to contain my relieved smile, though, and hugged Charlie, thanking him profusely for giving Edward and me a chance.

'I can't believe my little girl is growing up so fast,' he whispered with a thick voice. 'Seems only yesterday I brought you home from the hospital. Look at you now: a beautiful young woman, a boyfriend…'

'Daddy,' I said, a little overcome with emotion myself at his sudden declaration. 'I'll always be your little girl. But I'm Edward's girl now, too.'

'You're serious, aren't you? You love him.'

'So much, it hurts. He's everything.'

'And he treats you right?'

I nodded.

'Good. You deserve nothing but the best.'

'He is, Daddy.'

This time, he nodded, and patted me lightly on the head. That signaled the end of that particular conversation. It was the longest and most emotional and honest I had had with him in a long time.

I started mingling a little and was introduced to people left and right. After a while, I finally found Edward again, engrossed in conversation with Rosalie and her professor. He wrapped his arms around me as he pressed a kiss to my temple.

'How did it go?'

'Pretty good, actually. It took some convincing, but now he knows and won't come between us. You're invited to dinner this week.'

'Good. I was waiting for another chance to make a good impression.'

'So far, you're doing great. And your dad and Em stood up for us, too.'

We stood like that, just holding each other and swaying gently to the music, until I looked up and noticed something above us.

'Hey, Edward?'

'Yeah?'

'Do you know where we're standing?'

He looked around, obviously looking for something that stood out.

'Under the mistletoe,' I clarified.

A knowing look crossed his handsome face and his eyes darkened slightly as he registered what I meant.

'Right,' he said slowly. 'That means you'll probably want a kiss.'

I nodded, smiling at him a little flirtatiously.

'Very well, since we're under the mistletoe and all…' he feigned nonchalance.

He leaned down and cupped one hand around my neck while the other slid down to my waist, pulling me close. I reached up and clasped my arms around his neck, anchoring him to me. Our kiss started out slow, innocent and chaste, but I wanted more and slid my tongue in between his lips, seeking out his. Everything around us ceased to exist as I felt myself get lost in the way his lips moved against mine and his tongue caressed mine. We kissed deeply and passionately for an immeasurable moment, then pulled back in a few sweet little kisses.

'I love you,' I whispered against his lips.

When I opened my eyes, I noticed we had garnered quite some attention with our public display of affection.

'Everyone's staring at us,' I pointed out somewhat bashfully.

Edward chuckled.

'Not everyone. That guy just looked,' he motioned toward a guy near the bar.

'Come on,' he said then, and guided me over to where Carlisle and Esme were standing.

'I'm afraid we'll have to leave,' Carlisle said. 'I've got an early shift tomorrow. It's been great having you over, Bella. We'll see you this week?'

I nodded and bid them all goodbye, telling Edward I'd text him when I was on my way to Emmett's.

As I stood there gazing after him, Renee walked up behind me and put an arm around my shoulder.

'It's happened, hasn't it?'

At my confused expression, she looked at me pointedly.

'You and Edward?'

I blushed, realizing what she meant.

'I'll take that as a yes,' she said a little smugly.

'How did you know?' I wondered aloud.

'Little things, really. There's this vibe coming off you now that wasn't there before. And he's even more tender and delicate with you. It's endearing to watch. Was it what you'd hope it'd be?'

'Even better,' I couldn't help but smile.

'Good, that's all I need to know. Now, you're father and I have got a little something for you. Merry Christmas, sweetie,' she said as she produced a small black velvet box.

'Thanks, Mom,' I said as I took it from her.

In it was a silver swan charm with a diamond beak.

'Emmett told me you were getting a charm bracelet,' she explained, pulling the charm out of the box to attach it to my bracelet.

I hugged her in thanks, and after that she ushered me over to the exit, telling me Emmett and Rosalie wanted to go home for our movie night.

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**A/N Thanks to missrebecca for helping me think of some of the gifts. Also, have you guys read the o/s we wrote together? It's on my profile: Of Mermaids and Wildcats.**


	39. Epilogue  A new beginning

**Disclaimer: Twilight belongs to Stephenie Meyer and Summit. I'm just playing around a little. Please respect that.**

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**Epilogue**

**A new beginning**

Looking back at the past year on this New Year's Eve, I was astounded at where I found myself. Not physically – hanging out at my soon-to-be stepsister's had been second nature even since she moved in with my best friend. No, I mean mentally, emotionally… whatever. Previous years I would have been at some kind of party, working my way into another random girl's pants.

Last year had been particularly bad; I had been drunk out of my mind and could only recall bits and pieces the next day. One of those bits had been fucking the host's cousin against the bathroom counter. Another had been sticking my tongue down that girl's friend's throat at the stroke of midnight. And the last thing I remembered was being dragged out of there by Jasper and Emmett at one in the morning and forcefully being taken home.

Not one of my finest moments.

The upside to all that shit was that it could only get better after that.

And it did.

I can honestly say the best nights – and days – of my existence had all happened since Bella had come into my life.

It had started the night I had met her. Even if I would never have seen her again after that, I would always remember that night. The look in her eyes, the way she had smiled at me, her scent, her kiss…

Then more nights followed, one more amazing than the other. Of course, I had messed up at times, and people had tried to come between us, but in the end we had come out of it together and in love.

And this was only the beginning.

Yes, I had already started to make some changes in my behavior and lifestyle before I had met her, but she had made me even more committed to stick to them. I didn't want to ruin this good thing and risk losing her. She was too important. So I had made it my priority to work hard so I might be worthy of her. I didn't even want to fathom my life without her anymore.

This last week in itself had probably been one of the best out of the year. I still couldn't quite comprehend that Bella loved me. It was more than I could have hoped for at this time. Yet she did, and ever since she had first uttered those three glorious words that faithful Christmas Eve, I couldn't stop saying it, and showing her how much I worshipped her.

Sometimes I was a little overzealous in doing so, and I had already left some marks on her body. They would upset me more than her, though, as she claimed to love my sex bruises and love bites, while I kept berating myself for hurting her. I guess I still had to learn to trust her judgment in this and believe her to tell me if I ever went too far. I just couldn't stand the thought of hurting her, both physically and emotionally. I had done so once, unintentionally, and just thinking back to the look in her eyes at the time made me wince still.

Looking out over the Seattle skyline from the balcony of Emmett and Rosalie's apartment, I quickly shook those thoughts from my mind and took another drag of the cigarette I had come out here to smoke. Suddenly, I felt two arms snake around my waist from behind.

'What are you doing?' Bella softly asked as she rested her cheek against my back.

I covered her hands with one of my own, tracing patterns over the smooth skin of her wrist.

'Just… thinking.'

'Would you like some company?'

'From you? Always,' I responded, and moved to stand behind her, encasing her within my arms between my body and the railing.

She leaned into me, resting her head against my shoulder and caressing my arms. She didn't speak; just stood there with me as I thought back to earlier that week.

After the party at Volturi Inc., I had gone home with my family and had straightened out my room, since I hadn't had the time to do so in the morning. Clothes, underwear and condom wrappers were still strewn across the floor.

The night before had been better than I could have imagined. Who would have thought the shy girl I had met a little over two months ago would wake me up for a round of mind-blowing sex in the middle of the night? She had, though, and had proven to be quite the little vixen, as well. She liked it rough, apparently, and I had been happy to oblige.

I had gathered Bella's clothes and was hunting down a bag to put them in, when she had texted me to let me know she was on her way over to her brother's. I had changed into jeans, a t-shirt and my favorite hoodie and had made to leave. Alice and Jasper had retreated to his room, so I just knocked on his door and yelled that I was leaving, before heading downstairs to bid my father and Esme goodnight.

'Will you be spending the night at Rosalie's?' Esme asked, to which I nodded. 'Be nice to Bella,' she said knowingly. 'Today's been a little stressful for her.'

I could have been embarrassed at their knowledge of why I was going over there, but to be honest, I was glad. They supported our relationship and were realistic about its progression.

'Always am,' I had grinned, and quickly headed to my car.

We had enjoyed a relaxed evening in, just watching movies and cuddling on the couch. Bella had then led me into her room and stripped down to her panties, before tossing my hoodie across the room and lifting my t-shirt over my head so she could put it on.

'This is fast becoming the best part of the day,' she had breathed while unbuttoning my jeans and tugging them down.

'Taking my clothes off?' I had asked cheekily.

She had pondered that for a moment, then replied, 'Well, that too, obviously. But I actually meant just going to bed with you. I'd gladly spend every night in your arms.'

I couldn't agree more.

We had settled in, Bella securely tucked into my side. I had made love to her twice that night, very gentle and very quiet. Even though he had been pretty accepting of us and hadn't given us a hard time about the sexual component that had been gradually added, Emmett was still somewhat uncomfortable with our public displays of affection, and we didn't want him to get freaked out by being too vocal. Literally keeping quiet had also proven to have an added benefit: it made our connection that much more intense, communicating through tender touches and vivid stares. I had reveled in her quiet moans and gasps, though, and had felt ridiculously proud when I had to kiss her deeply throughout her orgasm to keep her from crying out.

The next day, I had driven her home, glad I had thought to bring a change of underwear and a clean shirt, and we had spent the day hanging out with Renee and working on a History paper she had coming up. Sometime before dinner, Charlie had arrived after having been stuck in meetings all day. He had been in a surprisingly good mood, considering he had to work through the holidays and was about to spend the evening with one of his less favorite people.

Dinner had gone pretty well. Bella had offered to make lasagna, with Renee providing a delicious garlic bread and me helping by putting together a salad. Yes, I wanted to make a good impression. I hadn't groped Bella even once, instead sneaking in little kisses from time to time before dinner, and holding her hand under the table during. It had taken some effort remembering to call her Isabella, as Charlie seemed to prefer, but I had managed.

Halfway through dinner, he had put down his fork and looked at both of us sternly.

'So, you've been sneaking around behind my back,' he had stated.

I had started to squirm a little in my seat under his glare, but Bella had stood her ground.

'Neither of us liked it, Daddy, but you didn't leave us a choice at the time. We talked about this yesterday,' she had said, a little exasperatedly. 'I thought you were alright with it now.'

'Doesn't mean I can't make the kid sweat a little,' he had winked.

Winked! Had the guy thought it was funny? Dude was fucking intimidating!

'I just want to know he treats you right and know the consequences of doing you wrong,' he had continued.

'Believe me, sir,' I had answered. 'I'm very well aware of both. I'd rather die than let any harm come to Isabella.'

'Very well. For now, I don't see any harm in the two of you dating. Answer me this, though: are you sleeping with my daughter?'

I had been glad I hadn't just take a bit, but Bella had been sipping her water and had started choking on it, her face turning bright red, both in embarrassment as out of lack of oxygen. I had rubbed her back soothingly as she spluttered, then had swallowed nervously before looking Charlie straight in the eye.

'Mr. Swan, I'm not going to lie to you. I am.'

His jaw had clenched and his hands had balled into fists beside his plate, but other than that he hadn't shown any reaction. Bella's jaw had dropped and she had been squeezing my hand furiously, while Renee had simply looked on in amazement.

'I love her. More than anything in the world. More than life itself. So of course I also want to express that physically. But I haven't pressured her. We've taken things slow and when _she_ was ready, we took that step. Of course, we're taking precautions. I don't want anything to happen to her. I can't stress it enough: I love Isabella.'

He had processed my words for a few minutes, then had nodded ever so slightly.

'I guess that's the best I can expect, under the circumstances,' he had admitted. 'So, you're really serious about this one?' he had asked Bella, who had nodded her ascent, still blushing, only not as brightly anymore.

'Sir,' I answered. 'If I may be so bold; I take this… us…' I motioned between Bella and me. 'I take it extremely seriously. I fully intend on asking Isabella to marry me.'

Instantly, Bella had frozen up beside me while Renee had gasped and Charlie's eyes had widened in surprise.

'If she'll want me. And only when she's ready.'

I had kissed Bella's hand and had whispered to her, 'I told you, you're it for me.'

Charlie had cleared his throat then, 'Right. Let's discuss that when the time comes.'

At that, he had picked up his fork again and had continued eating. Conversation had been limited to light and easy topics for the remainder of the evening. I think Charlie had finally started to see me as more than just some punk chasing his little girl that night.

I was pulled from my thoughts by Bella standing up on her tiptoes to feather soft kisses along my jaw.

'Let's go back inside, baby. It's almost midnight.'

We had opted for a calmer approach to New Year's than previous years; it was just the six of us and Esme – my father was on call and had been called in for an emergency earlier that evening – at Rosalie and Emmett's apartment. Bella and I were spending the night, while Jasper and Alice would be driving home with Esme. We had gotten some snacks and drinks and were simply enjoying each other's company, celebrating the start of the new year.

I already had some things lined up. The day after Christmas, I had gone into the tattoo shop where I had gotten my previous one, to set up an appointment and discuss the design. A few days later Diego, the tattoo artist, had e-mailed me several options, one of which was perfect. The first session would be the next Saturday and Bella was going with me. I had shown the design to my father and we had shared an emotional moment over it.

I had also talked to Diego about possible designs for something to reference Bella without actually getting a tattoo of her name. That one was still in the early stages, but still, something I was working on.

Then, of course, Valentine's Day was approaching. I would have loved to treat Bella to a romantic getaway, but since my father and Esme would be getting married then, I couldn't do that. I might combine it with our three-month anniversary two weeks earlier, though. Maybe I would take her to New York for the weekend. I knew she had never been there before, so that would be something special to share with her. But I would have to discuss it with her parents first.

So, all of that would give me plenty to do outside of school, my friends and Bella. For now, I was content with counting down the last remaining seconds of the year that had marked a turnabout for me and had brought me the girl of my dreams. As the clock ticked them away, I leaned down and whispered quietly to her how much I loved her, then kissed her.

The last kiss of the old year, and the best way to start the new year. A new year, a fresh start, with the girl I loved in my arms.

* * *

**A/N So there you have it. I hope this epilogue gave y'all a little bit of closure. Of course, their story isn't completely finished, but this felt like a good place to wrap up this particular episode of their lives. Also, I wanted to finish it before leaving for Australia in less than two weeks; I don't know how often I'll be able to go online (or on a computer for that matter) when I'm on the road and I didn't want to leave you hanging. I'll probably post some ****future-outtakes in a separate story, so if you're interested, put me on author alert. Again, I can't make any promises concerning a timeframe. Just know that there's some more to come.**

**On another note: I've outlined a **_**New Moon**_** AU plot bunny, titled **_**From Black Moon to Solstice**_**, which I'll be working on while traveling. I'll start posting that one when I've got a few chapters typed out, so bear with me. Jenn (GGSophie on ADF) has graciously made a banner for it already, which can be found on my profile.**

**Anyway, thanks to everyone who's read, reviewed and rec'd this story. I had a great time writing it and reading your thoughts about it. The various WCs I've participated in are also valued greatly.**


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